


Shadows of the Past

by Lady_Sage



Series: Shadows of the Past [1]
Category: Persona 3
Genre: EVERYONE - Freeform, F/M, I've spent so much time on this stupid fic, POV Original Female Character, Spoilers, don't hate me, it's 2018 do I even need to tag spoilers still, it's a day by day thing, like the video game itself, this story follows p3 fes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-02
Updated: 2019-03-08
Packaged: 2019-04-17 03:19:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 116
Words: 155,759
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14179383
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lady_Sage/pseuds/Lady_Sage
Summary: Kirika Nishioka is on her own. Has been for as long as she can remember. When she finds herself in Iwatodai, though, she finds that changing. Strange events are taking place, and she wants answers. So, she starts breaking her "loner" rules to get them. It starts small, interacting with a couple strangers who seem to share her special ability. Then her rule breaking gets out of hand when she joins a special group: SEES. From there, things get worse before they can get better. In the midst of all this magic and mystery, though, she finds herself somehow having a normal teenage life.





	1. Unknown, 2003

**Author's Note:**

> Goddess, I seriously hate summaries. Ugh... I digress.  
> Okay. I get that readers can be supper iffy about original characters. Trust me, I get that. This is a story I have been working on for so damn long now, though, that I just feel I deserve to put it out there. Even if it gets totally shat on, I need to do something with it. And I'm willing to take those risks because, again, I have dedicated so much--way too much--of my time on this stupid fic. I've even written a couple short "spin-offs" for it already. And I've changed my OC's name literally three different times. So...yeah, I'm gonna go for it.  
> As mentioned in the tags, this fic plays out like the game itself. I'm following the timeline/script of p3 FES, but from my OC's point of view. It's not legitimately day-by-day, but it's still hella long. And since it's April and that's when it starts, I figured I'd be funny and post each part on its corresponding date. Good way to keep track, yeah? That being said, it'll take a year for me to finish uploading it. So, stay tuned cuz y'all are in for a long fucking ride if you decide to jump on. Don't think I'll strictly focus on just this fic, though. I'll post others in the midst of this one cuz I'm sure I'll need a break from it here and there, as well lmao  
> Welp, here goes nothing.

Screaming.

 

She couldn’t stand the shouting. It pierced her eardrums. Filled her eyes to the brim with tears. It left her breathless. There was nothing she could do to stop it, though. She couldn’t turn back time. She couldn’t undo what she had just done. She couldn’t stop the stinging on her cheek, amplified by the salt running down it. There was only one thing left for her to do.

 

Run.

 

That was all she could think about; all she could think of doing. Run and get as far away from that person as possible. That person. The stranger. They were nothing to her, just as she was nothing to them. She was nothing more than a target now. A mistake. A girl who had crossed the line. Who knew too much. Who had witnessed too much. A girl who had more power than what should’ve been plausible.

 

Power.

 

She had no idea what these powers were. How they were supposed to be properly used. What they were meant for. All she knew was that she was now being punished for them. She was being punished for powers she never asked for. Powers she never wanted. She was being punished for an accident. A well-deserved accident. But it was somehow still wrong.

 

She had only been trying to help. To protect against the black creature that had come out of nowhere. Aid people who didn’t deserve it. She didn’t deserve this. She was too young for this. Eleven was far too young to have had such morbid experiences. Too young to have been through hell and back. Too young to know death by its name. By its eyes.

 

Death.

 

These thoughts were dizzying her. The moon hanging lower in the sky was baffling her. The strange green atmosphere wasn’t helping, either. Her head grew heavy and she could no longer think straight. She felt as if her consciousness was draining.

 

Draining.

 

She realised she had started slowing down. No. She couldn’t slow down. She had to keep going. She wasn’t far enough away yet. Not nearly far enough away. That fact was proven true when she looked over her shoulder to see the distance between her and them closing. And they looked even angrier than before. Angry. Feral. Ready to make the same mistake she had, but on purpose. So, she let her adrenaline take over. She let her fear carry her feet forward.

 

Fear.

 

The emotion of her childhood. Every time she took a wrong step. Every time she spoke without permission. Every time she failed at a task. The result was always fear. Terror. Anxiety. Distress. It was all she knew. All she had been raised to know. Every other sort of emotion escaped her. Every other emotion ran long before she had started. And the fear heightened when even more of those black creatures began to rise from the bloodied ground.

 

That was when she felt something stir deep in her chest. It was the same feeling she had gotten before the incident. A feeling of something awakening within her. And the next thing she knew, there was another strange creature towering over her. The same creature as before. A creature of light. A creature that wanted to support her this time. Or maybe it had wanted to assist her before, too, but just hadn’t realised what it had been doing was wrong.

 

Stop.

 

Enough thinking. She had to act. She had to—Except, the creature was already acting on its own. It created what seemed to be some sort of barrier between her and the stranger. Her and the creatures. A wall neither could pass through. A shield.

 

Protection.

 

There was even more screaming, but she kept running. And this time, she wasn’t gonna look back. She had to stop caring about the stranger. She had to stop caring about the accident. She had to focus on herself while she still had the chance to escape. Nothing else mattered anymore. All that mattered was her and the—

 

Nothing.

 

Everything stopped. The moon was back to its normal size and the world was no longer tinted green. Somehow, though, she had ended up on the ground. And the creature that had emerged from within her had returned to her. She examined her hands and knees, now covered in scrapes and bleeding from the fall she took. But she didn’t care. It wasn’t important.

 

She looked behind her. The stranger was gone. They had disappeared into the unknown. Now everything seemed calm. As if nothing had even happened. She took a deep breath and placed a hand to her chest. She could feel a faint beating other than her own heart. Almost like something living inside her. Something she had to nurture. Something that would also nurture her.

 

Idun.


	2. April 6th, 2009

Kirika Nishioka stepped off the train, taking a deep breath as she readjusted the small bag on her shoulder. It had been six years since she was last in the city. Iwatodai. The city she literally ran away from. And now she had returned for some reason she still didn’t quite understand. All she knew was that something was telling her it was time to come back. And when that faint beating told her something, despite how much she hated it, she made sure to always listen.

 

She took her time walking around the city, giving herself a mini tour. Although, not much had changed since that fateful night. But she still wanted to give herself the chance to take it all in.

 

Soon enough, she found herself at Paulownia Mall, which was a part of the man-built island that was still fairly new when she had taken off. She stopped by the pharmacy and picked up some snacks. She had a decent amount of money left over from the odd jobs she worked in the last town she temporarily lived in, but she was definitely gonna have to spend it carefully.

 

After leaving the pharmacy, she walked by the police box. She debated stopping inside, asking if there were any shelters in the area, but she knew the city had none. There was an orphanage, but that wasn’t what she needed. Not that she would’ve been able to stay at one even if she wanted to. So, she shook her head and continued on her way.

 

“Anything I can help you with, Miss?” a male voice then said from behind.

 

She froze, turning on her heel to face the Officer who had stopped her. “Uhm, no thank you, sir.”

 

“You seemed to have been contemplating something.”

 

She shrugged her shoulders. “Just…got lost in thought.”

 

He looked her up and down, raising an eyebrow. “Are you sure there isn’t anything I can assist you with?”

 

“I’m positive.” She turned to walk away only to stop again. “Actually, maybe there is one thing.”

 

“And what would that be?”

 

“Do you happen to have a map of the city? I’m sorta new to the area.”

 

With that, Kirika followed the Officer into the police box. He stepped behind the front desk and pulled out a map, laying it flat on the surface before them. He explained where they were and all the other places around the city. The school. The local restaurants and shops. The movie theatre. The shrine. The hospital. The tramline. Everything she could possibly need to know.

 

“What’s this place over here?” she said, pointing out an area the Officer had yet to touch base on.

 

“Ah. That’s an abandoned development. You won’t find anything there.”

 

She traced her finger over the area. “Why was it abandoned?” Dumb question. She was almost certain already knew the answer.

 

The Officer cleared his throat. “Was there anything else you needed?”

 

“No, I think that’s everything.” She stood up straight. “Any chance I can keep this copy of the map?”

 

“Of course.” He folded it up and handed it to her.

 

“Thank you, sir.” She gave him a small bow. “Have a nice day.” She took her leave, taking another deep breath once she was outside the mall. She then pulled the map out of her pocket, looking it over thoughtfully. “There has to be some…out-of-the-way spot in this godforsaken city where I can lay low during the nights.”

 

One thing that hadn’t changed over the last six years was Kirika’s habit of living on the streets. Then again, with no family and no real source of income, it wasn’t like she had much of a choice in the matter. So, she let go of her childish fears and built an immunity—she desensitised herself—to the rough society of being homeless. Plus, she always had Idun.

 

Idun. The temperamental creature living inside her that had a mind of its own. Who only came out to play when she felt it was necessary, rather than when Kirika felt she needed her. It was far from a symbiotic relationship. It was her only relationship, though. That odd creature was the only thing she could depend on.

 

Kirika continued towards the part of Port Island she had yet to venture through. She soon stopped dead in her tracks when she reached a bridge she couldn’t recall. She couldn’t remember it, yet it was somehow far too familiar for her liking. There was a twinge in her chest as Idun reacted to the sight, and a searing rush of white pain filtered in her head. She dug the heels of her palms into her eyes in an attempt to override the pain she felt everywhere else. She stumbled back until she lost her balance, falling to her knees. She continued to squeeze her eyes shut, gritting her teeth and pounding her fists into the ground until, just like that, it all came to a stop.

 

She took a few quick, short breaths before calming herself enough to take a deep one. She then slowly opened her eyes, blinking repeatedly until her gaze refocused. Her hands were shaking, her knuckled covered in blood, and her head was pounding, but Idun had relaxed.

 

Kirika’s gaze fell back upon the bridge before her. Maybe the bridge had never made an impact upon her before, but it was clear now it would hold some sort of importance to her in the future.

 

Slowly, she rose to her feet. She wiped the dirt off her knees, despite the stinging in her knuckles, and looked around. No one else was present, so she assumed her little panic attack had gone unseen. Good. The last she needed was a bunch of strangers checking to make she was all right.

 

She turned her back on the bridge to retrace her steps. Another thing she didn’t need was to be thinking about the future. Or the past, for that matter. She couldn’t dwell on it. Not now. Not after so many years of running away from it and avoiding it. Hmm. For good reason, of course. The past made her weak; she needed to be strong. So, she refused to reminisce.

 

As she walked, she lost sight of herself. Of her surroundings. She had become blissfully unaware of where her feet were leading her. Until, that is, she was about ready to turn a corner when a random fist came at her out of nowhere. She grabbed the person’s wrist, deflecting the punch and practically spinning herself under their arm.

 

“Whoa, that was an impressive dodge,” the puncher said. “Sorry about that. Guess I got so caught up in my training that I lost focus of the people around me.”

 

Kirika turned to get a look at the young man who had nearly hit her. He was about her age with white hair. He was jogging in place, too, as if the encounter hadn’t fazed him in the slightest. She shook her head. “Yeah, well, I’ve spent most of my life protecting myself from morons who don’t watch where they’re going.”

 

His brow furrowed. “Hey, I apologised.”

 

Now she laughed. “Oh, my bad. I completely forgot that saying sorry automatically fixes everything.” She rolled her eyes. “Tch.”

 

“Whatever. I gotta get back to my training.” With that, he jogged off.

 

She watched the young man until he disappeared. Then she continued on until she found herself back at Port Island Station. She took a seat on a nearby bench and glanced at her wristwatch. 4:58. It was nearly sundown and she still had to figure out a place to spend the night. At this point, she’d be content with just about anywhere. So, she looked around the station and observed the people coming and going. After about twenty minutes, she realised that quite a few kids were heading down a narrow alleyway. Her curiosity got the better of her, and she decided to check out where it lead.

 

There were a few people—mostly teenage punks—present. It was just a shifty back alley, though. Nothing special about it. A few of the kids looked her way, but no one bothered to acknowledge her. That was okay. She didn’t need her presence to be made a big deal of. All she needed was a place to spend the night, and this seemed to be her only option now. But hey, it was better than nothing. So, she found herself a small corner and took perch there, sitting down.

 

Soon enough, a young man approached her, squatting before her. “You ain’t from around here, are ya?”

 

“What gave it away?” she said.

 

He chuckled before standing back up. “Hope you can take care of yourself.”

 

“You don’t have to worry about me.”

 

That was when he handed her a cigarette. She took it without questioning the gesture, and he lit it for her before walking away. She took a long drag, holding it in, feeling the smoke spread through her lungs.

 

No, this certainly wasn’t ideal. But it would do. Especially with nightfall so close. After all, the night was a time for shadows.


	3. April 9th, 2009

Kirika took only a few days to adapt to her new surroundings. New…yet old. And while the back alley still wasn’t her ideal homing—or so-called—situation, it was better than nothing. And that same guy walked over to her every evening and offered her a single cigarette without ever saying a word. It was strange, but she wasn’t ready to question it. Which was also strange, because she usually questioned everything. For some reason, though, Idun wasn’t wary of this guy. Not yet, at least.

 

She spent the better part of her morning at the café in the mall. They weren’t hiring at the moment, unfortunately, but they still made a good cup of coffee. So, after having four, she made her way for Port Island Station. She was planning on taking the rest of the day to continue her search for odd jobs. After all, if she wanted to support herself, she would need to figure something out sooner rather than later. She could only go so long without eating. The last time she went any sort of elongated period of time without a substantial amount of food was when she was thirteen, and she had gone at least five months without a full meal. Now she refused to let that happen ever again. She was already thankful the warmer season was on its way, so if only she could also be thankful for a decent amount of money in her pockets.

 

It wasn’t long before the sun began to set. But since it was a particularly warm evening, she decided to stay out for a little while longer. She missed the sight of a city at night. Plus, the last time she had seen Iwatodai at night was when she had been running away from—That wasn’t something she wanted to remember, either. She would give just about anything to forget the incidents of that night.

 

If only Idun could protect her from that sort of pain.

 

Soon enough, Kirika found herself at Naganaki Shrine. Despite the fact that she wasn’t a superstitious person, she figured she would at least pay a visit. Maybe give an offering. Maybe it would benefit her in the long run. So, she made her offer, and then took a seat on one of the empty benches. She sat and let herself enjoy the quiet. The stillness. She let Idun enjoy the peace. Besides, not like she knew how long it would last. And if the past was any indication, it wouldn’t last long.

 

Next thing she knew, it was somehow a quarter to midnight. Unaware of how she had managed to spend that much time at the shrine, she hastily got to her feet and made her way for Iwatodai Station. As she walked, there was a fresh chill in the evening air that sent a shiver throughout her entire her body and into her very bones.

 

Something felt…off.

 

She arrived at Iwatodai Station and awaited the tram that would take her to Port Island Station. With each step she took, she checked her watch for the time.

 

11:57. 11:57. 11:57. 11:58.

 

Her body grew tense.

 

She continued waiting, practically bobbing in place. How could it have gotten so cold so quickly? She checked her surroundings. It seemed she was the only person out at this time. She found that hard to believe, too. She couldn’t have been the only person waiting for the tram.

 

11:59. 11:59. 11:59. 11:59. 12—

 

All of sudden, everything changed. Everything stopped. The lights went dark. The moon seemed to be hanging lower than usual. Red liquid oozed from the cracks in the walls. In the streets. A green tint filled the air.

 

Kirika checked her watch once more to discover that it was unresponsive. “Huh? The hell is going on?” she said under her breath. She tapped the clock-face. “C’mon, you were just working a minute ago…”

 

Bringing her hood up and pulling her bag tighter against herself, she stuffed her hands into her pockets. She ventured from her spot by the tram stop, searching for a sign of anyone else who could be in the area. Ugh. This all seemed vaguely familiar. Like a bad dream. A bad, reoccurring dream. And she still had that same off feeling.

 

Then, out of nowhere, she heard a loud crash. She spun in the direction of the noise, her bag dropping from her shoulder. She left it behind as she began running towards the commotion. Idun wanted her to turn around, but she couldn’t. She had to figure out what had caused that. She had to make sure no one was hurt. She was a defender, after all. A protector.

 

When she reached her destination, she stopped dead in her tracks. A giant black creature stood before her. Her eyes widened at the sight of it. It loomed over her, causing her to feel like a child over again. To fear like a child. The creature reminded her of the ones she had run away from so long ago. This one was different, though. It was much larger. And it looked as if it was wearing a mask. It had eight arms. Ten arms? Or would they be legs? She shook her head. As if that really mattered.

 

The creature hadn’t noticed her yet. It seemed to be focused on something—or someone—she couldn’t see. Then she heard what sounded like a gun being fired, followed by the appearance of a second creature almost out of thin air. She knew better, though. This creature had to be similar to Idun. And it’s arrival definitely intrigued Idun. The creature attacked the black masked one with what looked like streaks of lightning. The black creature grew even more agitated. It fought back, the second creature disappearing. And that was when the initial distraction finally came into Kirika’s view.

 

He was the kid who had just about punched her in the face.

 

She ducked back as the creature turned in her direction. She looked towards the guy on the ground. He was clutching at his shoulder, so she could only assume he had injured it. Idun could tell he was in a lot of pain, but he was still conscious. Lucky for him. The unlucky part was that he didn’t seem to be able to get himself back on his feet. But then he was reaching for something… He brought a hand to his head, but the black creature attacked again. He lost hold of the object in his hand, and it skidded to Kirika’s feet. It was a—

 

A gun.

 

With the sudden urge to pick it up, she went against her basic instincts and grabbed hold of it. Idun was telling her to follow the stranger’s lead, so she put the weapon to her head. She had no idea what would happen next, but she did know the creature was closing in on the guy. So, she had to do something rather than just stand on the sidelines.

 

She pulled the trigger.

 

Once she opened her eyes after realising she had closed them, she saw Idun towering before her, forming a shield between the black creature and the stranger. She pulled her hood back up before rushing behind the shield as well, standing before the guy on the ground.

 

“What the—?” she heard him say.

 

“Get up,” she said.

 

“Who are you?”

 

She shook her head. “Doesn’t matter. Just get out of here. I’ll distract this thing for as long as I can, but you have to go. And don’t forget this.” She held out the gun-like object for him to take, still not looking back at him.

 

He took it from her. “Wait. What about you?”

 

Kirika continued to keep her focus on the creature attempting to break through Idun’s shield. “Don’t worry about me. Just go.”

 

“But—”

 

She held back an eyeroll. “Now.”

 

She sensed his hesitation, but he finally took off in the opposite direction. Good. Now she just had to force Idun not to submerge until she could get herself to safety as well. So, she glanced around the area, searching for a quick escape. All the while, the black creature was still trying to break down Idun’s shield. Soon enough, though, Kirika decided there would be no easy escape. If anything, she would just have to make a run for it.

 

Great. More running.

 

She shook her head at the thought and started carefully taking steps to the side. She kept doing this until she was facing the direction the stranger had run off in. Then she turned around and took off in the opposite direction. But when she looked over her shoulder, she noticed the creature was no longer going after her. Instead, it seemed to have gone in the stranger’s direction.

 

“Shit,” Kirika said, out of breath as she came to an abrupt stop. “Well, hopefully I was able to buy him enough time.”

 

As she took a couple minutes to even out her breathing, she examined her surroundings. She noticed something weird not too far off and headed towards it. Slowly. Cautiously. With her luck, it would end up being another one of those black creatures. Then she’d be screwed, especially with Idun having already returned within her. Once she approached it, though, she saw that it wasn’t another one of those creatures. If at all possible, it was so much worse.

 

A coffin.

 

It was a coffin. An actual, standing coffin. In the middle of the street. Hell, why was there a coffin out in the open like that? Or three coffins, for that matter.

 

Her gaze scoured the area. She focused on the ground and the walls, examining the red liquid seeping from between the cracks in the stone. She couldn’t tell if it was blood or not, and she was too afraid to find out. Then her eyes landed on the coffins again. How the hell did they get there? Were they part of some messed up practical joke? No, they couldn’t have been…

 

She let out a heavy sigh as Idun finally felt at bay within her. Feeling that, she knew there couldn’t be any danger left. So, she made her way back to Iwatodai Station, making sure to retrace her steps to her bag first.

 

Once she returned to the station, she took a seat on a nearby bench. The only thing she could do now was wait. So, that’s exactly what she did. She waited…and she wondered. She wondered why the creature had been so much more intrigued by the stranger. She wondered why she and the stranger seemed to be the only two people who had been physically present. She wondered what the hell was going on in this damn city.

 

Ugh. She hated not knowing. This was something she had been experiencing for about six years now, and she still didn’t understand it in the slightest. But at least now she knew she wasn’t entirely alone. After all, if she was experiencing these oddities, and that guy was experiencing these oddities, then there had to be other people experiencing them as well.

 

One way or another, she would just have to track them down.


	4. April 10th, 2009

Once everything had returned to normal and Kirika made it to the back alley, it was close to 12:30. That struck her as odd given the fact that it seemed as if so much more time had passed. Then again, it also seemed like time had stopped around when that creature showed up. Rather than question it, though, she decided to rest as best she could.

 

And she would have…if she hadn’t been so paranoid.

 

It wasn’t long before the sun had risen. The skies took on a grey colour that day, and she found herself waiting for the rain.

 

Her job search also continued that day. She checked in at every restaurant and every café and every store. Nothing. Somehow she had decided to return to the city at a time when no one would be hiring. Despite how much she didn’t want to, she sighed in defeat. Her money was already running low and she wouldn’t be able to ration it for much longer. It would only last her about another week or so, if that. Maybe two. By the end of the month, though, she would definitely be impoverished.

 

But that wasn’t the only thing on her mind. She still found herself thinking about the stranger and the creature. She wanted to know who he was and why he seemed to have been the only other person—aside from herself—alive during that time. Plus, she wanted to know how much he knew. After all, it had seemed like he had tried parring with that creature. So she wanted to know if, maybe, he had his own Idun; something living within him that protected him from those strange dangers.

 

Only problem was that he was the same stranger she had bumped into before and was rude to. So, why would he want to help her out and cooperate with her? Then again, she had practically saved his life. Who knew what could’ve happened to him if she hadn’t come along when she did? But she also had no idea where to even begin trying to find him. Didn’t help that her skills didn’t include tracking people, but rather…hiding from people.

 

She shook her head of the noxious thoughts. She had to have better things to be thinking about. For instance, finding a job so she could feed herself.

 

Soon enough, she ventured her way back to Paulownia Mall. Despite the fact that it was probably a bad idea, she stopped by the café for a cup of coffee. Hell, she was tired. She needed to rest, but she couldn’t. She just felt weakened by the night’s occurrences. It was a sort of…drained exhaustion. She could only imagine it was caused by running away from that creature. What else could it have been? Either way, she was definitely lacking in her typical energy.

 

She didn’t give herself the opportunity to settle in. If she did, that one cup of coffee would turn into another four cups, and she really couldn’t afford that. So she made haste with her cup, paid, and took her leave. She still hung around the mall, though. Not like she was in any sort of rush to return to the back alley.

 

That was when she noticed someone standing outside Club Escapade. Someone she had never seen before. Anticipating a potential job opportunity, she decided to approach the man.

 

“Excuse me?” she announced her presence.

 

“Hello, miss,” he said after he turned to face her. “Can I help you with something?”

 

“I was wondering if you were maybe hiring.”

 

“We’re currently closed, and you gotta be at least eighteen to work here.”

 

“I’ll be eighteen in October. Is that close enough?”

 

He chuckled, shaking his head. “If that’s the case, then talk to me again in October. For now, though, I’m afraid you’re shit outta luck.”

 

“Please, there’s gotta be something I can do for you. Cleaning. Washing dishes. Anything. I just really need the money.”

 

“That’s what every teenager says.”

 

“Oh yeah? Does every teenager tell you that they’ve been living on the streets for a good six years?”

 

He paused, raising an eyebrow at her. “You seriously expect me to believe that? That a little girl could’ve survived on the streets alone for six years?”

 

“I’m living, breathing proof.”

 

Now he let out a heavy sigh. “Listen, I wish I could help you. I really do. Rules are rules, though. Like I said, talk to me again come October. Until then, ain’t nothing I can do for you.”

 

Kirika swallowed hard, holding back an eye roll. “Okay. Thanks anyway.”

 

With that, she left the mall and made her way back to the alley. Once she arrived and had settled in her corner, the cigarette guy played out his usual routine. She played her part, and sucked in the smoke once the bud was between her lips. When she released it, she followed it up towards the sky. The grey sky. The world was growing dimmer quicker due to the lack of sunshine.

 

The rain never came.

 

Soon enough, she tossed the cigarette away. Her eyes remained on the sky as they drifted closed. Her thoughts wandered into dreams of creatures lurking in the dark. Dreams that turned into reality all too frequently.

 

Nightmares.


	5. April 12th, 2009

The sun had finally returned to Iwatodai, so Kirika decided to roam the city. Especially after spending the previous day dozing on and off in the back alley due to a serious lack of energy.

 

First, she stopped by a comic book store and a used book store and browsed through the literature. Then she hopped on a tram heading for Port Island Station. Upon arrival, she checked out the movie theatre. They were holding a marathon of documentaries; nothing she would’ve been too interested in sitting through. So, she made her way for Paulownia Mall. She stopped by the arcade, but didn’t play any games. Then she checked out the record shop, where she had to talk herself out of buying a couple albums. From there, she went to the café. She figured a hot cup of tea might do her some good.

 

By the time she got herself out of the mall, it was a quarter past nine. She headed for the back alley without thinking twice about it. When she arrived, the cigarette guy wasted no time in walking over to her.

 

“How many cigarettes do I have to give you before you talk to me?” he said.

 

“Tch.” She rolled her eyes at him. “If that’s what you’re going for, then you should just stop giving me cigarettes.”

 

He grinned. “C’mon, don’t deny the chemistry.”

 

“Don’t make me laugh.”

 

“Hmph.” His brows furrowed, yet he still handed her a cigarette. Then he walked away without lighting it.

 

“Aren’t you forgetting something?”

 

“I dunno.” He looked back at her with an ugly sort of smirk. “Talk to me and maybe I’ll remember.”

 

“Ugh.” She placed the unlit bud in her hoodie pocket. “Not that easy.”

 

Kirika leaned against the wall, closing her eyes. But next thing she knew, Idun had her on her feet. She glanced over towards the strangers across from her who seemed to have been…whispering. She then took a deep breath before leaving the alley. She’d come back later. Maybe. For now, though, it looked like she would be wandering the city.

 

In the end, the only place her wondering took her was back to the mall. At this point, it was nearly 10:30pm. She collapsed onto one of the benches with a heavy sigh. Her face fell into her hands, but it wasn’t long before someone disturbed her.

 

“Excuse me, young lady,” an older gentleman in a suit said. “May I have just a moment of your time?”

 

She looked up at the man with a raised eyebrow. “What do you want?”

 

“How would you like to become famous?”

 

“What are you—?”

 

“With a pretty face like yours, you’d be a perfect model for my company. All I need from you is a down payment of—”

 

“Look, I ain’t in the mood for your scam.”

 

“Scam? That’s such a dirty word.”

 

“And if you don’t leave me alone, I’ll tell the cops,” she gestured towards the police box behind her, “just how dirty of a word you used on me.” She smirked at him, making sure to wave in a patronising way. “Bye-bye now.”

 

The man scoffed at her before walking away. Once he was gone, her face dropped and she slumped in the bench again. She barely had any time to relax, though, before being approached by someone else.

 

“Hey, kid, what are you doing here?”

 

Her eyes landed on the owner of Club Escapade. “What do you care?”

 

“It’s late. Don’t you have school in the morning?”

 

“I don’t attend school.”

 

“Well, your parents must be worried about you.”

 

“I don’t have parents.” She tilted her head in an almost thoughtful way. “Like I told you before, I’ve been on my own for the last six years.”

 

His eyes widened a bit. “You were actually serious when you said that?”

 

“Why the hell would I make something like that up? What would be the point of lying about that?”

 

“Sympathy.”

 

“Tch. The last thing I want is for people to feel sorry for me.”

 

“Wow…well…” He shook his head. “Still, what are you doing here at this hour?”

 

“What does it matter?”

 

“Stop being hotheaded and just tell me.”

 

She pursed her lips. “I’ve been sleeping at that back alley by Port Island Station, but the punks there were kinda giving me the creeps tonight, so I left.”

 

“You’ve been sleeping there? That can’t be good for your health.”

 

“Whatever.” She paused before pulling the cigarette out of her pocket. “You got a lighter on you, by chance?”

 

“Aren’t you underage?”

 

She shrugged her shoulders. “I won’t tell if you don’t.”

 

He chuckled a bit. “C’mon, follow me.”

 

She did as she was told, and followed him inside the empty club. He walked behind the bar while she took a seat on one of the stools. When he came back, he had a lighter with him and his own cigarette. He lit Kirika’s and his own and set the lighter down.

 

“Y’know,” he spoke up, “there’s a vacant studio above the bar if you’re interested.”

 

“Don’t do me any favours,” she said, shaking her head. She took a long drag. “Besides, I don’t have the money to pay for something like that. Nowhere in the city seems to be hiring right now.”

 

“Gotta be something you could do.”

 

“My last resort.”

 

“And what’s your last resort?”

 

Another drag. “Palm reading.”

 

Now he laughed. “Trust me, that’ll be popular around here.”

 

“Oh, believe me, I know. There are strange things going on in this city after all.”

 

He furrowed his brow curiously. “What do you mean by that?”

 

She paused, swallowing hard. Idun was now in her _get out of there_ mode again. “Well, I guess I should be going.” She put the cigarette out in a nearby ashtray. “Thanks for the light.”

 

“Hold on, at least stay in the studio for tonight.”

 

“Look, I appreciate the offer, but you don’t gotta put a roof over my head. I’m fine on my own. I’ve been taking care of myself my whole life.”

 

“I don’t doubt that. And I’m not trying to—”

 

“I don’t care what you’re trying or not trying to do. I still ain’t interested. Okay. I don’t deal with people.”

 

“You do know palm reading involves other people, right?”

 

She clenched her jaw. “Thanks again for the offer, but I’ll pass.”

 

With that, she turned on her heel and showed herself out. Once she was outside the mall, she stopped to catch her breath. It wasn’t until then she had realised that she practically ran out. But that’s how Idun was; she wouldn’t let Kirika get close with anyone. Not that Kirika was complaining. It was the truth when she said she didn’t deal with people. She wasn’t into growing any sort of emotional attachments to anyone. And Idun always made sure she stuck to that.

 

It was just another way she was protected.


	6. April 13th, 2009

The next morning, Kirika felt more exhausted than she had in ages. She had ended up curling up on a bench near the hospital for the night. It wasn’t the most comfortable place to sleep, though, and she never really slept for longer than half an hour at any given time. Now the only thing she could think about was coffee. So, she reluctantly returned to the mall to go to the café, deciding to get a cup to-go since she wasn’t at all in the mood to hang around. When she was handed her coffee, though, she forgot to do one crucial thing…

 

Pay.

 

“Excuse me?” the barista called after her.

 

“Hmm?” she said, turning back.

 

“Are you trying to blatantly steal from us?”

 

Her eyes widened. “I’m so sorry. I’ve been up all night, and I’m just so tired—”

 

“Yeah, yeah, I’ve heard it all before. Do I need to report you?”

 

“No, of course not.” She stepped back up to the girl and handed her the money she owed. “I wasn’t even trying to steal. I don’t get why you’re trying to make a scene.”

 

“Just get out of here.”

 

“Seriously? What is your issue?”

 

“Right now, it’s you.”

 

“Is that really any way to speak to a customer?”

 

“Well, since you tried stealing—”

 

“Except I didn’t. It was an honest mistake.”

 

“An honest mistake? Tch. I’m gonna tell you one more time to get out of here.”

 

“This is ridiculous.” She slammed the coffee cup back down in front of the barista. “Keep the change.”

 

She walked out of the shop, taking a deep breath to calm herself down. Not the best start to the morning. So, she decided to stop by the record shop before taking her leave to try to get her mind off things. And after about fifteen minutes of browsing, she left.

 

“That’s her, Officer,” she heard from the other side of the fountain.

 

She turned to look in the direction of the voice to find the barista standing outside the coffee shop with an officer at her side. Kirika clenched her jaw. Just perfect.

 

Next thing she knew, she was in the back room of the police box with the officer sitting directly across from her.

 

“First off,” he spoke up, “what’s your name?”

 

“Kirika Nishioka.”

 

“All right. Why don’t you start with telling me what happened?”

 

“Or you could tell me what the barista told you. Then I can just tell you that it’s bullshit. It’ll make this whole process a lot quicker and easier.”

 

“That’s not how this works. Tell me your side.”

 

She sighed. “I went in for a cup of coffee and accidentally walked away without paying for it. She stopped me and I apologised and gave her the money I owed. Didn’t try making a run for it or anything. Yet she still accused me of stealing even though I didn’t end up even taking the coffee with me.” She shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t know what to tell you. Just…for whatever reason, that damn barista has it in for me.”

 

“Hmm.” He thought for a moment. “She said you did take the coffee.”

 

“Do I look like I’ve had caffeine today?”

 

“You also smell a bit like smoke.”

 

“I sleep in that back alley by Port Island Station because I have nowhere else to go. But what does that have to do with this?” She sighed, rolling her eyes. “Y’know, forget it. It doesn’t even matter. Do whatever you need to do. Convict me. Charge me. Doesn’t make a difference.”

 

“How about I let you off with a warning?”

 

“Tch.” She folded her arms across her chest. “Don’t treat me like a child.”

 

“Don’t be so quick so grow up.”

 

Now she raised an eyebrow. “That’s really it, though? You’re just gonna let me go.”

 

“Well, I have no reason to keep you here. It doesn’t seem you’ve actually done anything wrong.” He paused. “Although, if I do a background check on you and find something odd, we may be in touch.”

 

She let out a little chuckle. “Good luck finding anything on me.” She got to her feet and took her leave. “As far as the rest of the world is concerned, I don’t exist.”


	7. April 19th, 2009

As the next few days passed, Kirika made sure to avoid the mall altogether. She really wasn’t in the mood for dealing with people with poor attitudes. She had enough of a bad attitude from herself; she didn’t need it from other people, too. Instead, she posted up at the strip mall and dealt her cards. Literally. Almost.

 

She resorted to reading people’s palms and giving people tarot readings. It had always been a quick way for her to earn some extra money. And it was especially popular in the cities. That hypothesis continued to prove itself true, too, as captivated stranger after captivated stranger sat before her to have their futures told.

 

At first, she had been afraid of the shops calling the cops on her. Afraid they would claim her to be a nuisance. By the end of the week, though, most of the shop owners had actually thanked her for bringing in some extra business for them.

 

It was a late Sunday night when one of the restaurant owners offered her a hot meal once they had closed. Kirika hesitated at first, but the painful rumble in her stomach caused her to accept the offer. Lucky for her, the owner didn’t attempt to strike up a conversation. He seemed to have been more focused on cleaning his shop.

 

“How much do I owe you for the meal?” she said once she finished.

 

“It’s on the house,” he said. “In exchange for a free palm reading, of course.”

 

She held back the eye roll, forcing a smile through her clenched jaw. “See? There’s always a price.”

 

With that, she set up a mini station and sat across from the owner. Due to having never watched her read someone’s palm before, she was able to give him a quick reading. One that wasn’t so in depth. She touched the surface, but didn’t dive into the waters. And he seemed satisfied by the end, either way. She then bid the man goodnight and took her leave.

 

That was when she realised just how late it was. 11:52. She let out a heavy sigh. There was no way she would be catching any tram at this point. That didn’t stop her from waiting at the station, though. And she waited until her watch was stuck at midnight. Until the moon dropped in the sky. Until the atmosphere turned green. She waited for the start of the stop.

 

That was when she ventured off from the station. She wandered the vacant city, counting the coffins as she went. So far, she had seen a total of five, but she still couldn’t figure out exactly where they were coming from. Just like how she couldn’t figure out where the blood oozing down the streets was coming from. Or who.

 

Soon enough, she came across a section of Iwatodai that looked…abandoned. And not just because of the current atmosphere. It was an area with rows of houses that looked as if they hadn’t been lived in for years. She knew it was the area on the map the officer from her first day back in the city told her to avoid. An area she had no desire being in anyhow. An area where—

 

She didn’t seem to be alone.

 

Kirika froze when she heard movement. Idun had yet to react, though, so she figured it couldn’t be a threat. Not yet, at least. But that still didn’t cause her to be any less cautious as she approached where the sound had come from. She stopped at the corner, taking a deep breath. Idun was still relatively calm, which was surprising, to say the least. But that did explain why Kirika was so calm as well.

 

Just as she was about to turn the corner, she heard the same sound come from behind. So, she turned on her heel and dropped the cautious act. She ran towards the noise until she ran into something. Well. Some _one_.

 

“Oh, thank god,” she said to the stranger, letting out a breath of relief. It was probably the first time she had ever been pleased to interact with another person. “I thought you were gonna be one of those weird creatures. Or another coffin.” She paused. “Ugh. I digress.” She dropped her head as her hands fell to her knees for support. “Any chance you could explain to me what’s happening? What’s been happening?” she continued, but when she stood back up straight, the stranger was already gone. “C’mon, seriously?” She brought her hands to her head, running her fingers through her hair. She then lifted her hood up and stuffed her hands into her pockets. “This is ridiculous.”

 

Aggravated as she was, she made her way back to the station. Hell, she hadn’t even been able to catch a glimpse of the stranger’s face. She could’ve walked by this guy a hundred times over the course of the last couple of weeks, but she wouldn’t know. She wouldn’t be able to recognise him. Although, she couldn’t blame him for his behaviour. Typically, she would do the exact same thing to others as he just did to her. That didn’t make her any less curious, though. Or, again, aggravated.

 

He was now the second person she had come across during this strange hour of the night. And this guy seemed less than eager to speak with her, but she needed answers. She needed them, and she would get them. By any means necessary.


	8. April 21st, 2009

Kirika took a day to recuperate before returning to the strip mall. Almost right away, she had four people lined up to have their futures told. She couldn’t help but chuckle at their eagerness. It’s not that she didn’t believe these sorts of things—otherwise she wouldn’t have learned the craft. What she found amusing were the people who rely so desperately on these things. Even the most accurate palm reading meant nothing because of the way things change so constantly. And the future is definitely—obviously—one thing not set in stone.

 

After going through the four people and a couple more who arrived later on, she decided to take a break. As she walked—to an undetermined location—she had her gaze down and focused on the tarot cards she was organising. Because of that, she didn’t notice the person coming from the other direction, and ended up ramming right into them.

 

“Oh, sorry, I wasn’t—”

 

“Paying attention,” he said when her words faltered after she had looked up at him.

 

It was the same guy from her first day back who had almost hit her while coming around a corner. The same guy who was attacked by that creature. The same guy she had helped escape the creature.

 

She shook her head. “Of all the people I could’ve run into. Ugh. Literally.”

 

He actually smiled in response. “Guess that makes us even.”

 

Now she rolled her eyes. “Whatever.” And she walked away.

 

But he came after her. “Hold on, you seem familiar.”

 

She froze for a moment. No. Her hood had been up that night; there’s no way he could’ve seen her face. “Uh, yeah, probably because you almost punched me in the face when we first met.”

 

“Aside from that, I mean.”

 

“I don’t know what to tell you, then.”

 

“Hmm…”

 

“Look, I really don’t have time to chat. Nor do I want to.”

 

With that, she took her leave. And this time, he didn’t follow her. Idun, on the other hand, was urging her to turn around. So, it took just about every ounce of Kirika’s being to keep herself from looking over her shoulder. Idun was right, though. There was something about that guy. There had to be. She had bumped into him three times now, after all. And it was a decent sized city with plenty of people for her to run into. So why him? Plus, he was the guy she had helped that night. So maybe the reason was as simple as that. Maybe he could give her answers she sought. Maybe he knew more about all these strange happenings and had a better understanding of them. Maybe…

 

She stopped and closed her eyes, taking a deep breath. This was all too much. She wasn’t used to so many casual interactions with people. And maybe that was unhealthy, but she didn’t care. She had raised herself a certain way, and that way involved her not having to deal with people. Not having to form any sort of relationships. She was okay with that, too. More than okay. What she wasn’t okay with was this city. She never wanted to return to it in the first place. She was only here because Idun compelled her to come back.

 

Hell, she could really use a cigarette.

 

Finally, she returned to the strip mall. She already had three more people waiting. So, she set up her little station and took care of them one-by-one. Once she finished up with the third person, though, she decided to call it a day. She then headed for the station and took the tram over to Port Island. From there, she didn’t go to the mall or go on a walk or anything. She just went to the back alley. From there, she walked right up to the cigarette guy. Rather than asking him for one, though, she pulled the one from his own mouth out and took a drag.

 

“The hell you think you’re doing?” he said, reaching to take his cigarette back.

 

Kirika dodged him. “Don’t get the wrong idea.” She took another drag before handing it back to him.

 

“Tch.” He took it and turned his back on her.

 

She went to walk away, but stopped when her eyes landed on someone she had never seen before. A guy who would probably be a lot taller if he had better posture, wearing a beanie and a pea coat. She had never seen him before, yet—

 

She nudged he cigarette guy with her elbow. “Hey.”

 

“What?” he said.

 

“Who is that guy?” She gestured towards the stranger with a nod of her head.

 

“He’s a prick. That’s all you need to know about him.”

 

When she looked back over at him, she found that he was staring at her as well. She froze, but the gaze didn’t last long. He scoffed—or seemed to have—before walking away, leaving the alley. She watched him until he disappeared into the shadows.

 

She shook her head, retiring to her corner for the night. Hell, she couldn’t have been more aggravated with herself for being so caught up on some guy. Or two, in that matter. It wasn’t like her. She didn’t get attached. There was too much shit from her past to deal with to get attached to anyone.

 

Her past…

 

She’d wipe every memory of her entire past if she could. As of right now, though, that wasn’t possible. So, she’d continue living with it. Ignoring it. Forcing herself to forget it. But that wasn’t always easy.

 

Then when it was easy, the reminiscences came back to haunt her in her dreams.


	9. April 26th, 2009

After just about two weeks of avoiding Paulownia Mall, Kirika decided she would put the incident behind her and stop by. She was desperate for a cup of coffee. During her walk, she found an old leather wristwatch. She picked it up and examined it, seeing that it was still in working condition. So she pocketed it and continued on her way.

 

When she entered the café, she braced herself for another encounter with the accusatory barista. She quickly discovered, though, that the girl was nowhere to be found. Instead, there was a new girl behind the counter who greeted her with a bright smile that made her feel just a little bit uncomfortable.

 

Once she ordered her coffee and left, she stopped by the police box. The officer who had taken her in for interrogation was there again.

 

“Good morning, sir,” she said.

 

“It was…Nishioka, correct?”

 

“Yeah. And I’m afraid I never caught your name.”

 

“Kurosawa.”

 

She nodded her head once. “Okay.”

 

“What can I help you with?”

 

“Nothing. I just found this on my way here,” she pulled the watch out of her pocket, “and wanted to turn it in. I’m sure there’s someone out there looking for it.”

 

“Thank you.” He took the watch from her. “I’ll keep it in the lost and found.”

 

“Cool. Later, then.”

 

“Just a moment.”

 

She stopped, closing her eyes and holding back a sigh. Then she turned back to the officer. “Yeah?”

 

“I see you have a coffee there,” he said.

 

“All paid for.”

 

He chuckled just a bit. “I wanted to personally apologise for the incident. As it turns out, the barista who had accused you was stealing from the café herself.”

 

“You don’t have to apologise to me. I’m more than used to people trying to pawn off their stupid schemes on me. Never works out in their favour, though.”

 

“By the way, I did do a background check on you, and…you were right. I couldn’t find anything. I mean, it’s almost like—”

 

“I was never even born,” she finished for him. “I know.”

 

“Why is that?”

 

“It’s a long story.”

 

“Good thing we have some time, then.”

 

Now she took a deep breath. “Let’s just say my parents weren’t the most conventional. Nor were they very good people.”

 

“What happened to them?”

 

“They both died when I was eleven.”

 

“And you were never brought to an orphanage or foster care?”

 

“Couldn’t without any records of myself.”

 

He examined her thoughtfully for a moment. “Well, how do you expect to start a life like that?”

 

“Tch. My life started a long time ago when I had to skip over my entire childhood just so I could figure out how to raise myself. Provide for myself. Support myself. And I don’t need any records to prove that I’m alive.”

 

“Hmm. You seem like a strong girl.”

 

“I’ve had no other choice but to be strong. Now, if you don’t mind, I need to go.”

 

“In a rush to get somewhere?”

 

“Nope. Just don’t wanna be here. Not in the mood to be interrogated, after all.”

 

With that, she took her leave. She left the mall and returned to Port Island Station, trying to figure out something to do. She really didn’t want to go back to the alley already. Yet she stood at the bottom of the stairwell with her eyes glued to the entrance. That seemed to be the only place where she could actually ignore people without getting ridiculed for it. And she wasn’t in a very personable mood that day. So, with a heavy sigh, she made her way for the alley. She stopped at the entrance, already able to smell the smoke. Before she could take another step, though, there was a hand on her shoulder.

 

“Trust me, you do not wanna go back there,” a young man wearing a backwards baseball cap told her.

 

Kirika shrugged his hand off her. “Excuse me?”

 

“All the punks hang out back there. One look at you and they’ll—”

 

“They’ll what? Are you implying I can’t protect myself? Because I can.”

 

His eyes widened a bit. “Whoa, whoa, no, that’s not what I meant at all. I’m just trying to look out for you.”

 

“Tch. I don’t need you to look out for me. You don’t even know me.”

 

“Hey,” he put his hands up in surrender, “it was just a friendly warning.” And he walked away.

 

She let out a heavy sigh. Little did that guy know, she had already been to the back alley a multitude of times. She knew all the punks hung out there. She heard the whispers. She saw the ways they looked at her. She wasn’t an idiot… So then why did she always end up returning there?

 

Oh yeah. Because she had nowhere else to go.

 

Then again, that didn’t mean she wanted to be at the back alley. Especially not right now.  So, she turned away from the alley and headed towards the theatre. Another marathon was being held, and she had earned enough money by this point to purchase a ticket. So that’s what she did instead.

 

By the time the marathon ended, the sun was already beginning to set. Going in, Kirika had no idea how long it was gonna be. She was almost relieved, though, because she just needed to waste time somehow. And she did. Then she spotted the guy with the baseball cap exiting the theatre. He saw her, as well, and gave her a little nod and a smile. She took a deep breath in response, but didn’t acknowledge him, despite Idun’s want to go speak with him. Instead, she ventured off towards the back alley again.

 

She collapsed in her little corner and rested her head against the wall behind her. She was the least bit tired, but she knew she should sleep. She also hadn’t eaten all day, so that fact was bound to catch up with her by the late hours of the night. Or…the early hours of the morning, technically.

 

She sat up straight and observed the rest of the people spending their time in such a dark, place. She wondered what happened to them during that strange time of night. That was when it hit her where the coffins came from. The people turned into the coffins. Oddly enough, that was the only reasonable explanation, seeing as it would also justify why she rarely ever ran into anyone else. Now she just needed to figure out why it happened. She wasn’t sure where to find the answers, though. Ugh. No. That was a lie. She knew exactly where she could get answers from, but she didn’t want to use that approach. And that was the only thing stopping her right now.

 

She let out a heavy sigh as her head fell against the wall again. It had been a while since Idun had really made her presence known, and Kirika couldn’t decide if that was good or bad. She supposed it was good since that meant she hadn’t been in any sort of danger recently. Yet, she also couldn’t help but feel that it was bad because she had grown so used to feeling Idun stir within her. She had spent the last six years with her right there under her skin, after all. By now, she was just so used to her, and she couldn’t bear the thought of somehow losing her. Losing her abilities.

 

Abilities she still didn’t fully understand, even after all this time. Abilities she once used to resent. Abilities she never wanted in the first place, yet grew to rely on. Abilities she practically had to force herself to use. Abilities that hurt her and exhausted her and wore her out. Hmm…

 

Maybe losing them wouldn’t be such a bad thing. Maybe she’d be better off without Idun and these abilities. Maybe…

 

No. She was given these abilities for a reason. It wasn’t random. It couldn’t have been. There was a reason and she still needed to figure it out. She needed to find the meaning behind them. She needed to find her excuse for using them. And she wouldn’t give up on them—or on Idun—until she figured it all out.

 

That was a promise Kirika had made to herself years ago, and she had every intention of keeping it.


	10. April 29th, 2009

Another few days passed that Kirika spent wandering the city. She set up her station outside Paulownia Mall one day. Outside the shrine another day. Then she decided to set up in the back alley. Hell, if she was gonna stay there and let those punks get away with talking about her, then she might as well get something out of it at the same time.

 

“The hell is this about?” the cigarette guy spoke up first.

 

“Palm and tarot reading station,” she said. “All for the low price of 1415 yen.”

 

The girls that hung out at the back alley were the first to approach Kirika. Once a few of them had their palms read and futures told, the guys seemed to grow more intrigued. That was, until the last person sat down in front of her. The cigarette guy with that ugly smirk of his plastered across his face.

 

“I’m gonna prove you wrong,” he said.

 

Kirika didn’t respond. She wasn’t interested in being proven wrong. She didn’t care if he believed it all or not. It was still money in her pocket. That’s what she cared about. So she started her normal routine. Handed him the cards to shuffle. She split the deck. Had him choose the deck that felt more right to him, though she was sure he chose randomly rather than having put any actual feeling into the choice. Either way, she picked up the deck, already sensing a lot of negative energy from it. She dealt the cards and began.

 

Card after card she flipped over was in the reverse direction, thus having the undesirable annotation instead of the encouraging one. And with each card she flipped, he grew more and more pissed off.

 

“You rigged the deck, didn’t you?” he said.

 

“Excuse me? You shuffled it. You chose it. This is your own doing.”

 

“It’s a bad deck.”

 

“There’s no such thing as a bad deck. Just a bad attitude.”

 

“Tch. Whatever. Let’s just move on to the palm reading.”

 

“Stopping this in the middle of a reading could—”

 

“I don’t care.” He stuck out his hands. “I’m growing impatient.”

 

She swallowed hard, still sensing the negative energy. Maybe it was all the smoke in his lungs and brain, but something wasn’t right with this whole scenario. Idun sensed it, too. That off feeling didn’t stop her from continuing, though.

 

Kirika took one of his hands, swatting the other one away. She began examining it while absentmindedly making her speech about the process of palm reading and how it works and…blah, blah…blah. Ugh. She was boring herself, even. No. She wasn’t bored, she was just cautious. Idun was making her cautious. Using her subconscious to her advantage so she could keep a clear focus on the guy sitting before her. The guy who was looking up at her face rather than down at their hands.

 

“Are you paying attention?” she said, breaking her concentration. “Because if you’re not gonna listen, then I’m not gonna waste my time.”

 

There was that ugly smirk again. “C’mon, what are you waiting for?” He took his free hand to trace a soft line along her forearm. “What’s holding you back?”

 

She stiffened. She moved to pull herself away, but before she could get far, he wrapped his hand tightly around her wrist. “Let go,” she said. “Now.”

 

He leaned closer to her. “Make me.”

 

Her hands clenched into fists as she met the guy’s gaze, unfaltering. She swallowed hard. “Get away from me.”

 

“I don’t think so.”

 

She leaned away as he moved even closer, but then his presence was suddenly gone. She opened her eyes, unaware of when she had closed them, and saw someone was standing between her and the guy. The stranger with the beanie. He then turned on her and pulled her to her feet. He kept a grip on her as he started walking away, though, prompting her to follow him. She did so with a clenched jaw.

 

“I didn’t ask for your help,” she spoke up once they were a good distance away from the alley.

 

“Tch. You’re welcome,” he said.

 

“No. I didn’t thank you because I didn’t—”

 

“You didn’t look like you were doing much to help yourself, so I stepped in.”

 

“Ugh. I’m not some damsel in distress.”

 

“Again, you’re welcome.”

 

She rolled her eyes as he began to walk away. And as she caught a glimpse of him out of the corner of her eye, it hit her all once.

 

“Hold on,” she said. “You’re the guy from the other night.”

 

“Excuse me?”

 

She stepped back up to him. “The guy I bumped into in that area of Iwatodai with all the abandoned houses. You’re him.”

 

“The hell you talking about?”

 

“C’mon, you know exactly what I’m talking about.”

 

“Can’t say I do.”

 

“Yes, you do. You’re that same guy. And, y’know, you were so eager to get away from me that night. Now you’re helping me?”

 

He let out a heavy sigh. “You’re new around here, aren’t you?”

 

“What does that have to do with anything?”

 

“Because I can tell you don’t belong here.”

 

“Tch. Now you’re only insulting me to try to get rid of me.”

 

“The hell do you want from me?”

 

“I just want some answers.”

 

“Well, I can’t help you.” And he began to walk away again.

 

She got herself in front of him before he could get very far. “Please. I just want to know what’s going on.”

 

“Gonna need a bit more to go on than that.”

 

“At midnight when time pretty much comes to a standstill and everything stops working properly and—”

 

“Listen, there ain’t nothing I can tell you.”

 

“You have to know something. Like what causes it or—”

 

“I know just as much as you do.”

 

“Why am I finding that hard to believe?”

 

“I dunno. Why am I finding it hard to give a shit?” He shook his head, stuffing his hands even deeper into his coat pockets. “Don’t look for me again.”

 

He walked away, and Kirika let him go without interruption this time. But she watched him until he disappeared.

 

Well, that was a bust. And it had just been a reminder as to why she doesn’t interact or deal with people. Because they never come through; they only ever let down.


	11. May 1st, 2009

A couple days later, Kirika found herself walking along a new—yet old—pathway. She decided that she would try to venture towards the Moonlight Bridge, despite her strange aversion for the place. She figured she’d have to face it again sooner or later. Figure out what about it bothered Idun so much. So why not get it done and over with sooner and while she had the opportunity to decide for herself?

 

Halfway there. Not bad. With each step becoming more and more hesitant, though, she knew she’d end up changing her mind and turning around. Hell, seventeen-years-old and she was cowering like a child. She shook her head, unable to wrap her mind around her vague timidity.

 

Then she heard a soft cry. She stopped in her tracks and listened closely. The crying went on and she attempted to move closer in the direction she presumed it was coming from. By her fourth try, she had started moving on the right track. Before she knew it, she was standing in front of some bushes, but the crying was definitely more prominent now. She walked around to see a little boy crouching down behind the brush, holding his arm. Her eyes widened a bit and she knelt beside him.

 

“Are you all right?” she checked.

 

He shook his head. “No-no. My shoulder r-really hurts.”

 

She gently examined the shoulder of the arm he was clutching. “It looks like you may have dislocated it,” she said.

 

“Can you fix it?”

 

“No, but I can certainly accompany you to the hospital.”

 

He sniffled, nodding. “Okay.”

 

She helped the young boy to his feet and they made their way towards the hospital. Lucky for them, it wasn’t too far off.

 

“Where are your parents?” Kirika spoke up.

 

“They’re both working.”

 

“Then what are you doing here all by yourself?”

 

“School just got out, but I didn’t wanna go home yet. I always play for a bit before going home.”

 

“Playing alone can be dangerous, though.”

 

“That’s what my parents always say.”

 

“Maybe you should listen to your parents more often, then. They seem like pretty smart people.”

 

He giggled a bit. “Yeah, they’re the smartest!”

 

She smiled. “Oh, I bet.”

 

She spent the rest of the short walk attempting to keep the boy’s mind off the pain of his injured shoulder. She told him stupid jokes and made bad puns—really bad—and kept him talking about his family and school and friends. Before either of them knew it, they were standing at the front desk of the emergency room.

 

“Hello, ma’am,” Kirika greeted the woman behind the desk.

 

She smiled. “Good afternoon.”

 

“This little boy has an injured shoulder,” she said. “I’m not positive, but I think it may be dislocated.”

 

“We’ll take a look at that immediately. Just fill out this paperwork for him.” She handed her a clipboard and a pen. “Bring it back to me once you’re finished.”

 

“Oh, I’m actually not his guardian.”

 

“It’s okay for his sister to fill it out, too.”

 

“I’m…not his sister, either.”

 

She raised an eyebrow. “Then who are you?”

 

She swallowed hard in regards to the woman’s abrupt change of tone. “I’m—I’m no one. I was just taking a walk this way when I heard him crying. He told me he had just gotten out of school and his parents were working, so I figured I’d bring him here myself rather than wait for his parents.”

 

She nodded. “I see.” She took back the pen and clipboard, pursing her lips. “We’ll take it from here, then. You’re free to go.”

 

Kirika smiled sheepishly. “Thank you, ma’am.” She turned back to the little boy. “This nice lady is going to watch you from here.”

 

“You mean you’re not gonna stick around till I get better?” he said with a pout.

 

“Afraid not. I have to get going.”

 

“But why?”

 

“I…have to get back to work.” He didn’t have to know that was a lie.

 

He sighed, though he was still pouting. “Well, I guess that’s okay.”

 

Now she laughed. “Thank you. Feel better soon, kiddo.”

 

With that, she took her leave. She exited the hospital and decided there would be another time for her to face the Moonlight Bridge. So, she headed back in the direction she had come from. And it wasn’t long before she spotted a somewhat familiar figure.

 

“Hey there,” she said once she caught up.

 

“I told you not to look for me,” the stranger with the beanie said back, not even bothering to glance over at her.

 

“I didn’t look for you. I was heading this way and I just so happened to see you.”

 

“And what made you think it was okay to talk to me?”

 

She shrugged. “Just surprised to see you out in public. Figured you were a vampire or something with the way you’re able to appear and disappear just like that.” She waited for a reaction she would never receive. “Hmm. So, what are you doing over this side of the city?”

 

“Regretting every choice I’ve made today.”

 

“Nothing like a good dose of regret.”

 

“Tch.”

 

“Wow. You’re just as bad as I am.”

 

“I ain’t nothing like you. So don’t compare yourself to me.”

 

“How would you know? You don’t even know me.”

 

“Good. Let’s keep it that way.”

 

“Whatever. Sorry.” She paused. “Later.”

 

With that, she departed to make her way towards Paulownia Mall as the stranger went on towards Port Island Station. She walked backwards, watching him—again—until he disappeared. Then she turned to face straight forward for the rest of her walk, wondering if the stranger was making his way for the back alley. What did it matter to her, though? It shouldn’t have mattered. Yet it did.

 

She cursed Idun under her breath.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look at that, we've made it through the first month. And I've survived without any major criticism lol  
> Thanks to everyone who's checked out this fic so far (even if you decided if wasn't your taste). The hits are greatly appreciated.


	12. May 5th, 2009

Golden Week came around and, for once, Kirika had actually been looking forward to it. Usually she dreaded it. After all, Golden Week only ever meant larger crowds of people. Extra people she would have to avoid. Except now it meant extra money. On the first day—Constitution Day—she set up her mini station at Port Island. Just about every other passenger to step off the tram was interested in her offer. On the second day—Greenery Day—she set up at the strip mall. That gave Kirika her normal traffic, plus some.

 

On the third and final day, she set up outside Naganaki Shrine. She planned for this to be a simple handout day, seeing as it was Children’s Day. And there certainly were plenty of children running about the city as families came and went throughout the day. Most of the kids seemed to be unsupervised and Kirika couldn’t help but wonder where their parents were at. How could they not be watching their kids? The thought bothered her a bit, especially after having found that little boy only a few days earlier. Of course, that hadn’t been entirely the parents’ fault, but still…

 

“Are you a fortune teller?” a little girl suddenly said, stopping in front of her makeshift station.

 

She put on a smile. “You could say that.” She leaned closer. “Would you like to find out what the future has in store for you?”

 

“Yes, please.”

 

“Okay. Have a seat.” The little girl did as she was told. “What’s your name?”

 

“Maiko.”

 

“What a pretty name.”

 

“Thank you.”

 

“Can I have your hand?” She eagerly stuck her hand out, and Kirika took it gently. “See this line here? It’s your love line.”

 

“Am I gonna fall in love?”

 

“Of course. You’re gonna fall in love and be super happy for the rest of life.” She paused. “Which, if you look at your life line, is gonna last quite a long time.”

 

“Really?”

 

“Yup. You’re gonna live till you’re old and grey. And you’re not gonna waste a moment of your life. Every part of it will be fulfilling.”

 

She had a dreamy look in her eyes. “Wow…”

 

She laughed a bit. “Now close your eyes.” The little girl, once again, did as she was told. Kirika took her tarot cards, shuffled them, and pulled out three. She placed them face down between them. “Okay. You can open your eyes.”

 

The little girl opened her eyes and they widened almost instantly. “What do these cards do?”

 

“One tells of your past. One tells of your present. One tells of your future.” She flipped the first card over. “Ten of Coins. That means your past was filled with security and safety and you had a good home life.”

 

“That’s true,” she said.

 

She smiled again. She then flipped the next card over. She froze for a moment, wondering how that card could’ve been pulled. The little girl didn’t look all too happy, either.

 

“That card looks mean.”

 

“The Hanged Man,” Kirika went on. “I know it sounds bad, but it’s actually a lot better than you realise. You see, it represents regeneration. Y’know, rebirth and renewal. So, it’s not an end, but rather a new beginning.”

 

“Oh.” Her smile returned. “Okay.”

 

“Okay. Last one.” She flipped over the final card. “Ten of Cups. Looks like ten must be your lucky number.” The little girl giggled. “Now, this one means your future will be full of happiness and contentment and peace and love. It also means your family life will still be good.”

 

Her smile widened. “Wow. That was amazing. How do you know all that?”

 

She gestured downwards. “It’s all in the cards. You just have to know how to read them properly.”

 

“Do you think I could be like you one day?”

 

“You can be whatever or whomever you want to be.”

 

“Thank you so much.” With that, the little girl got up and ran off.

 

Kirika stuck around for a while longer. When more and more parents started treating her like something contagious, though, she decided it would be best to leave.

 

“That’s her,” a little boy suddenly said.

 

She turned towards the voice. She spotted the boy and recognised him as the one from the other day. She smiled. “Hey there, kiddo.”

 

He smiled back. “Hi. These are my parents.”

 

She looked up at the couple behind him. “Good evening.”

 

The mother smiled as well. “Hello. Our son has told us quite a bit about you.”

 

“Yes, thank you for helping him the other day,” the father said.

 

Kirika shook her head. “Oh, you don’t have to—”

 

“You didn’t have to, either.”

 

The mother then pointed out her station. “What is this little set up you have here?”

 

“It’s uhm…for tarot and palm reading.”

 

The little boy gasped. “Mommy, Daddy, can I have my future told?”

 

“I’m not sure, son,” the father said. “She looks like she’s wrapping up.”

 

Kirika smiled. “I think I can squeeze him in. If that’s okay.”

 

The mother laughed. “That’s perfectly fine.”

 

“Okay.” She turned to the little boy. “C’mon, let’s sit down.” They took their seats. “Now, close your eyes.” He did so, and she shuffled the tarot cards again before pulling another three out. Once more, she placed them facedown between them. “All right, kiddo, you can open your eyes.” He continued to listen, but remained quiet. She flipped the first card. “Knight of Swords. This card represents your past. It states that you were brave and strong and heroic. That must be talking about when you hurt your shoulder. You were more courageous then than I was.” He giggled, and she couldn’t help but laugh as well. She then flipped the next card. “Strength. This card means you are determined and have a lot of energy and confidence. You accomplish any and everything you set your mind to.” He bounced a little in his spot, but still didn’t speak a word. She flipped the last card. “Six of Batons. This card represents your future. It predicts triumph and good news and an expected victory.” She sat back. “Looks like you’ll be living a pretty exciting life there, kiddo.”

 

“I’m gonna be a hero,” he finally spoke up.

 

“As far as I’m concerned, you’re already a hero.”

 

He giggled again before yawning. That was when the father picked him up. “Well, this little hero is worn out. He’s had quite the day.”

 

The mother beamed at Kirika. “Thank you so much. That was very sweet.”

 

“I was only saying what the cards stated.”

 

 “Oh, of course.” She laughed. “Enjoy the rest of your night.”

 

“Yeah, you too.”

 

She watched as the little family walked away. Then she let out a heavy sigh. Being that cheerful for a bunch of kids was exhausting. So, she finished packing up her things and left the shrine. She found herself heading for Iwatodai Station, but she wasn’t sure why. She couldn’t return to the alley. She hadn’t been there since the incident with the cigarette prick. At this point, though, it was almost second nature for her to head in that direction. But she needed to figure out a new place to stay. And that was when it hit her.

 

The abandoned houses.

 

So that was where she headed instead. For the section of the city that had the rows of old, abandoned houses. She was sure no one would mind if she made herself comfortable in one of them, after all.

 

When she arrived at the area, she stopped to look around. Somehow, she found herself conflicted with making a choice. It was stupid, really. Each house was just as rundown as the next, yet she had to find one that felt right. Correction: Idun had to find one that felt right. And when she finally did, Kirika stood before it. She observed it, noticing that it seemed to be the only house built of brick. And it felt oddly familiar to her.

 

Pushing that sensation aside, she made her way into the old house through a shattered window. Glass crunched under her feet as her weight met the floor. She looked around to find the place less abandoned-looking than she had expected. She pushed that aside as well, though. The only thing she cared about now was sleeping with a roof over her head. Hell, she couldn’t even remember the last time she had been so lucky.

 

She cautiously moved into the next room to find a futon. Without hesitation, she crawled onto it, curling into herself. Exhaustion took her over as the lack of sleep from the last few nights caught up to her. So, she made herself comfortable and drifted off to sleep. Despite being safer than she had been in over a month, though, that didn’t stop the dreams.

 

Dreams of bright lights being smothered by darkness.


	13. May 9th, 2009

That afternoon, Kirika passed by Gekkoukan High just as school was getting out. Much to her surprise, she heard a couple different students mention how there was going to be a full moon that night.

 

Right away, she took this into consideration. Last time there was a full moon… Huh, she was pretty sure one of those creatures had shown up.

 

With her curiosity peaked, she decided she would conduct a little experiment.

 

She returned to the brick house she now occupied and decided to rest until nightfall. She was half expecting to be kept up all night, after all. At this point, it was just about 3:30 in the afternoon. So, she set an alarm on her wristwatch for 11:59pm.

 

She lay down, closed her eyes, and waited…

 

And what felt like ten minutes turned out to be eight and a half hours. Her alarm went off and she woke up instantaneously. Instead of dismissing it, though, she let it keep on beeping.

 

“Forty-six…forty-five…forty-four…” she said, having started the countdown right at sixty. “Thirty-two…thirty-one…thirty…twenty-nine…twenty-eight…” She was waiting to see if her watch would stop working again. There was no reason it shouldn’t, since that always seemed to be the case, but she more so wanted to make sure it definitely happened exactly at midnight. “Sixteen…fifteen…fourteen…thirteen…twelve…” The beeping was starting to annoy her, but she didn’t have much longer to go. “Eight…” At least there was no one else around she could annoy with it. “Four…three…two…”

 

Her watch shutdown. She almost wanted to smile, but didn’t. She then hurried towards the window and crawled out of it. The atmosphere had altered, as per usual, that greenish tint filling the air. Blood oozed down the streets. No coffins in sight, yet, but she was sure she would come across some soon.

 

It was when she neared the more active—though, not at this hour—part of the city that she began spotting coffins. There was a disturbing amount of them. But what was even more disturbing was the fact that there were people unconscious inside them.

 

Her investigation started at the strip mall. That was near where her encounter with the other creature had been. So if another creature were to show up, maybe it would be here again. It was a risky test to take, but worth it. Besides, Idun would be there to warn her of any dangers.

 

The students had been right, too; the moon was most definitely full And, once again, it seemed to be hanging lower than normal somehow. That made it look even bigger. Kirika kept glancing up at it as she waited for something to happen. She was mesmerised by it. She couldn’t decide if it was eerie or if it was beautiful. In a sense, it did remind her of her nightmares. That made her more uncomfortable than anything else.

 

So far, nothing exciting had happened. Nothing had appeared from the darkness. Hmm. Maybe the creature from before had been a fluke of some sort…

 

Soon enough, she found herself at Iwatodai Station. But she didn’t get the chance to stick around before she heard voices. Voices? As in more than one person. As in a small group of people conversing with one another.

 

“Where is she?” she overheard a girl say.

 

“She’ll be here soon,” a guy then said.

 

“There’s a full moon tonight, but it looks even creepier during the Dark Hour.”

 

The Dark Hour? So that’s what this strange time was called…

 

Just then, Kirika heard the revving of a motorcycle. Baffled at first, she decided it wasn’t worth the risk of getting caught by strangers to figure out how that could be possible. So she snuck away from the station, heading in the direction of the shrine. She passed a few more coffins along the way, being vigilant to avoid each and every one of them as she stepped past them.

 

There still wasn’t anything that seemed out of the ordinary. Except for the time itself, of course. There were no traces of any creatures, though. Just the coffins and—

 

“Help!” a male voice shouted out of nowhere. “Help me! Oh god, please! Help!”

 

She ran in the direction of the screaming and didn’t stop until she came across the man who had been yelling. He spotted her and hurried over, reaching out towards her.

 

“Please! You gotta help me! Get that thing away from me! Make it leave me alone! Please! I’m begging you!”

 

Before she had a chance to respond to his pleas—or even react—the man froze. Blood abruptly began spilling from his nostrils and ears and he just collapsed. Her eyes widened in horror as she backed away from the scene. Actually, Idun might as well have pushed her away. And Kirika didn’t wait around long enough to see the thing the man had been yelling about. She had a pretty good idea as to what it could’ve been, though.

 

As she passed by Iwatodai Station again, she sensed… _it_. Something was off. She looked over towards the tracks to see that the tram moving. It wasn’t moving on its own, though; it was being controlled by… _something_. One of those creatures, maybe? It just had to have been.

 

Once again, before she could react, Idun was pulling her away. She looked around to see a small black creature rushing at her. That must’ve been what the man had been yelling about earlier. Rather than thinking too much about it, though, she just ran. Idun was in control by this point. She was guiding her feet—moving so quickly she felt as if she was going to trip over them—making her run in random directions in an attempt to get the creature off her trail.

 

Finally, she lost sight of the creature. So she stopped to catch her breath. She had made it halfway back to the abandoned houses, so she figured she would call it a night. After all, exhaustion had already settled deep into her mind. It wasn’t just from the running, either. This strange time always seemed to leave her drained of energy. It seemed to take a toll on Idun, as well.

 

She arrived at the brick house and crawled inside through the window. She practically collapsed on the floor right underneath it, but somehow managed to stumble her way to the futon in the next room over. Once she was curled up, she noticed the cut on her hand. It didn’t take long before there was a glowing sensation around it, closing the laceration. That was what Idun did. She could heal her. Rid her of the cut, but never the scar. Never the pain.

 

She brought her knees back to her chest to hold herself. And she fell asleep thinking about how there were more people like her out there.

 

She was no longer alone.


	14. May 10th, 2009

The following day, Kirika woke up fairly early. She lay on the futon for a moment, just staring blankly at the ceiling. Last night had felt almost like a dream. A nightmare. Except it hadn’t been. It was all too real. The coffins. The creatures. The monorail. The helpless man who had been attacked. The—the other people. That’s right. She almost forgot how there had been other people out there. People who seemed to have a grasp on that strange time. What had they referred to it as…?

 

The Dark Hour.

 

She shook her head and forced herself up. Once she was on her feet, her head spun. Then the pounding started. She groaned at the pain. It was gonna be a long day.

 

She made her way to Paulownia Mall to stop by the café. She sat down and had two cups of coffee before taking her leave. Unfortunately, though, the caffeine didn’t help to stop the consistent _thump_ in her head. She rubbed at her temples and, before she even realised it, she was back at Port Island Station. She stopped and looked around, her eyes soon landing on the entrance to the back alley. Hell, she knew it was a bad idea—and she wasn’t typically one to pursue people—but she couldn’t help but wonder if the stranger with the beanie would be there. _I know just as much as you do_. Bullshit. He had to know plenty more.

 

Finally, she let out an exasperated sigh. She then practically barged into the alley. After all, if she was gonna go back there after what happened before, then she was gonna go with her head held high. Besides, Idun didn’t believe in shame.

 

“You got a lot of nerve coming back here,” the cigarette guy said.

 

“Where is he?” she replied.

 

“Who?”

 

“The guy you called a prick.”

 

“Why do you wanna know?”

 

“Doesn’t matter. Just tell me.”

 

“Tch.” He stepped up to her. “Let’s just say he ain’t here to save you this time.”

 

She felt the urge to step away from him, but stood her ground. “I didn’t need him to save me in the first place.”

 

“How about I save you instead?” And there was that ugly smirk. “C’mon,” he closed the distance between them, “I can be everything you need and more.”

 

“Pretty sure you only need to get the hell away from me.”

 

“Give me a chance.” He put his hands on her shoulders. She stiffened at his touch. “Let me show you a good time.”

 

The other punks began to surround them. The cigarette guy pulled her closer, jerking her around a bit. Once she felt balanced, she shoved him away. Idun sure was pissed now. And when he came after her again, Kirika was prepared to fight back. Sure, she wasn’t a fighter, but she also wasn’t a pushover.

 

His hands were reaching out, except this time they were aiming for her neck. She grabbed hold of his wrists and kneed him in the gut. His hands moved away from her so he could wrap his arms around his stomach. She backed away from him, watching him. Waiting for his next move. He regained his composure and went after her again. She brought her hands up to defend herself, but he pushed her arms aside, grabbing hold of her shoulders and shoving her against the nearest wall. The back of her head slammed into it, and then a hand crossed her cheek before she had the chance to recover.

 

At the first taste of blood, Idun took over. And there was that searing rush of white pain in her head. Static.

 

Next thing Kirika knew, she was gasping for air and coughing violently. Once her vision refocused and her eyes adjusted to the lighting, she realised she was in a hospital bed. She focused on catching her breath, and it wasn’t long before a Doctor and Nurse barged into the room. She looked at them with wide eyes.

 

“What happened?” she spoke up, her voice hoarse.

 

“She must’ve blacked out,” the Nurse said.

 

“Hmm.” The Doctor seemed to be lost in thought. “Go retrieve the Officer.” The Nurse nodded and left. The Doctor turned his attention on Kirika, giving her a smile. “How are you feeling?”

 

“Flustered.”

 

“Yes, well, you are suffering from a minor concussion,” he told her. He paused. “What’s your name?”

 

“Kirika Nishioka.”

 

“How old are you?”

 

“Seventeen.”

 

“And when’s your birthday?”

 

“October sixteenth.”

 

“Very good. And your parents?”

 

“What about them?”

 

“Who are they so we can get a hold of them and let them know you’re here?”

 

“Oh. Uhm. My parents both passed away when I was young.”

 

“Oh. My apologies. Then the name of the orphanage or—”

 

“There isn’t anyone out there you need to get in touch with,” she said. “I have no family or friends or anyone taking care of me.”

 

The Doctor’s eyes widened before her shook his head. “I see. Well, moving on, then.” He cleared his throat. “Now, what’s the last thing you recall?”

 

She thought for a moment. “I—I was at that alley by Port Island Station. One of the punks attacked me and I fought back. At least, I thought I had…”

 

“You did,” another male voice said. She looked towards the door to see Officer Kurosawa standing there. “If you would excuse us, Doctor.”

 

“Of course. She did just wake up, though, so go easy on her.” He left them be, closing the door behind him.

 

She used her tongue to play with her swollen lip. “Am I in trouble?”

 

“Not necessarily. You were defending yourself, after all.”

 

“You’re just gonna go off that assumption?”

 

“No. The witnesses stated that the young man did indeed go after you first. But they also said you instigated him.”

 

Now she rolled her eyes, only to discover that it was a painful mistake. She squeezed her eyes shut next, trying to relieve the ache. “Yeah, if telling someone to get the hell away from me is an instigation method, then I guess I did.”

 

“Hmm. What were you doing there anyway?”

 

“I was looking for someone.”

 

“There was quite a lot of damage done. You didn’t have a weapon with you or anything, correct?”

 

She stared at him blankly. “Uhm…”

 

He raised an eyebrow at her. “You don’t remember the actual act of attacking this young man, do you?”

 

She swallowed hard. “No. I blacked out.”

 

“Well, you got him a lot worse than he got you.”

 

Now her eyes widened. “What exactly did I do?”

 

He gave her a curious look. “What do you think you did?”

 

“Did I—?” Her voice wavered, her gaze dropping.

 

“He’s…alive, if that’s what you’re getting at.”

 

She let out a shaky breath of relief. “Good.” She paused. “S-so what’s gonna happen to him now?”

 

“Once he recovers, he’ll be sent away.”

 

She nodded. “I promise…I’m not typically a violent person.”

 

“I believe you.”

 

“Thank you, sir.”

 

“You should try to get some rest, though. You’ve been through a lot today.”

 

“I’ll be fine. I’m…quick when it comes to recovering.”

 

He nodded his head. “Very well.” And he didn’t say anything else before departing.

 

Once he was gone, Kirika let out a heavy sigh. She cursed Idun under her breath for acting out in such a manner. They weren’t supposed to be violent; they weren’t fighters. They were defenders. Protectors. _But I was protecting you_. It was almost like she could hear Idun whispering it in her ear. She shook her head. Kirika appreciated the self-defence system, yes, but she didn’t appreciate the blackouts. She didn’t appreciate losing control. Not that it happened often—rarely ever—but… Things never ended well on those rare occasions when it did happen. Including this time.

 

Including the incident from so many years ago.

 

She lay back, trying to make herself comfortable. She seriously hated hospitals. The last time she was in one was when she had gone that elongated period of time without eating a full mean. So it had been about four years. And not only did she hate hospitals, but she never was a favourite patient. After all, due to Idun’s healing abilities, she always found herself recovering much quicker than doctors anticipated. They could never understand it, either. And she always had to play it off as strange, as well.

 

Strange. So many strange things were going on. This entire day, for instance, turned into a single strange experience. Not like she ever expected to end up in a hospital. But there she was. All because of Idun.

 

The power she had control over, yet could still control her.


	15. May 11th, 2009

By the following afternoon, Kirika was released from the hospital. Along with Idun’s defencive abilities came great healing abilities, so she tended to recover from injuries—even severe ones—much more quickly than what was considered standard. Because of that, she usually tried to avoid hospitals altogether. This time, of course, it couldn’t have been avoided.

 

After she was released, she simply enjoyed the rest of the day. There wasn’t much else for her to do anyhow. Not like she was gonna jump into palm and tarot readings again right away. Not with her head still aching the way it did. She shuffled through the decks of cards in her head, though, to check she hadn’t suffered any major memory loss from the concussion.

 

She eventually made her way to the Shrine. It had been a simple day for her, yes, but that hadn’t silenced the city noise. It hadn’t stopped the hustle and bustle of all the strangers around her who weren’t having such a simple day. So, she resigned to the Shrine for some peace and quiet. She didn’t end up being alone, though.

 

“You again,” she said.

 

The guy with the white hair she had bumped into more than enough times already was also there. He stopped jogging in place when he saw her. “Oh. Hey.”

 

“Hi.”

 

“What are you doing out here so late?”

 

“I could ask you the same thing.”

 

“I’m training.”

 

“At this hour?”

 

“I’ve practically been bedridden for the last month,” he said as he started back up with jogging in place. “So now that I’m almost better, I wanted to start exercising again sooner rather than later.”

 

“Hmm.” If her calculations were correct, about a month ago would’ve been the night when— “Have you been sick?”

 

“Just had a few injuries. Shoulder and ribs.”

 

“From?” Stupid question. Kirika was pretty sure she already knew what from, but that hadn’t stopped her from asking.

 

He paused. “Fighting. Or boxing, more specifically.”

 

“I see.” She thought for a moment, nodding. Fighting, huh? So those creatures could take a punch?

 

“What about you? Looks like you have a bruised lip.”

 

She subconsciously ran her tongue over her swollen lip. “Minor concussion, too. Got out of the hospital earlier today.”

 

He stopped again, his eyes wide. “What happened?”

 

“Kinda got the shit beaten out of me by some punk. But I guess he came out of it much worse.”

 

“Hold on…was that news report talking about you?”

 

“What news report?”

 

“There was a report last night about some intense brawl that happened in the back alley by Port Island Station.”

 

“Huh. That didn’t take long to get around.” She shook her head with a sigh.

 

“News travels fast in this city. Rumors travel even faster.”

 

“Good to know.” She swallowed hard. “Hey, uh…sorry about my attitude from our other encounters.”

 

He chuckled a bit. “Don’t worry about it.” He threw a few punches. “They say the third time’s the charm, anyway.”

 

“Hah, yeah…” She paused. “Well, I’ll let you get back to your training.” And she turned to leave.

 

“Actually, I’d best get back to the dorm before it gets to be too late.”

 

“Right. After all, you wouldn’t want to get caught out and about during—” She stopped herself, eyes widening a bit.

 

He froze as well. “During…what?”

 

“Nothing,” she said. “Forget I said anything.” She then began to walk away.

 

“Hold on.” He effortlessly caught up to her and blocked her path. “What were you gonna say?”

 

“Doesn’t matter. You should really get back, though. It’s just about ten o’clock.”

 

With that, Kirika stepped around the stranger and made her way for the abandoned houses, moving at a rapid pace. Once she got to the empty area, it was nearing eleven o’clock. She climbed into the brick house and fumbled towards the futon. Despite the simplicity of the day behind her, it had still been a long one. A tiring one. So as soon as her head hit the old pillow, her unconsciousness got the better of her.


	16. May 17th, 2009

Kirika avoided the public for a few days. And avoiding the public meant skipping a few meals. And skipping meals certainly didn’t help the ache in her head. So, after a good six days, she finally forced herself into the world. Hell, it had been a long while since she last felt this shitty.

 

It was a particularly nice day. The sun seemed to be shining brighter than usual—which worsened her headache—and there wasn’t a single cloud in the sky. She wanted to enjoy it, but it was taking a toll on her body. And her mind.

 

She didn’t last long before no longer being able to tell where she was. She could no longer tell if she was even still moving or not. The world was definitely spinning, though, and Idun was trying to catch up to it. Kirika tried to get her to stop, but arguing with her was usually pointless. So, she did the only thing she could think of doing in that moment; she stuck her hands out looking for something—anything—to grab a hold of. A way to support herself. Finally, her hands found something to latch onto that also held onto her in return.

 

“The hell is wrong with you?” a distant voice said.

 

At least, it sounded distant. It had to belong to the person helping her out, though. Right? She couldn’t tell.

 

Kirika parted her lips to reply, but her mouth was too dry to form words. She tried to force them out, but it was no use. Her vision kept blurring as her grip on the stranger slackened. Then everything went black…

 

When she next woke up, the reddish light from a setting sun was streaming through some nearby window. She blinked a few times, giving her eyes a chance to focus. Once they did, her surroundings became familiar. She was back in the brick house. Or…maybe she had never left to begin with.

 

Had that been some other crazy realistic dream?

 

Cautiously, she attempted to sit up. Her hand almost instantly went to clutch her head, trying to stop the pounding. Ugh, that’s right. She had blacked out again. Except this time Idun hadn’t caused it. Kirika supposed that was a good thing. That meant no one else should’ve gotten hurt.

 

When she heard the _thump_ of two feet hitting the floor in the next room over, she jumped up. She lost her balance, though, and fell back onto the futon. The stranger with the beanie then entered the room, a bag in his hand.

 

“The hell are you doing here?” she said.

 

“Saving your ass again,” he said. “You passed out.”

 

She closed her eyes in realisation. “So that did really happen? Ugh.” She gently shook her head. “And that was voice was yours?”

 

“I dunno. I guess.” He put the bag down. “The hell even happened to you?”

 

“Getting over a concussion.”

 

“Right. Because you were idiotic enough to go back to the alley and get your ass kicked.” He rolled his eyes. “You have a death wish or something?”

 

“The other punk is still in the hospital.”

 

His eyes widened. “No shit?”

 

“Yeah. Told you I could handle myself.”

 

“Then explain to me what happened this afternoon.”

 

“Like you said, I passed out.”

 

“Why, though?”

 

“Why didn’t you just bring me to the hospital?”

 

“Didn’t think you would need to go. You’ve only been out for a couple hours. You’re avoiding the question, though.”

 

“And you’re doing a bad job at pretending to not give a shit.”

 

“Tch. Could say the same about you.”

 

“Hmph.” She paused, considering whether she really should bother telling him the truth or not. “I haven’t eaten anything in almost a week.” She decided she might as well. “On top of that, the heat must’ve gotten to me.”

 

“Kinda had a feeling it was gonna be along those lines.” He pulled a box out of the bag. “That’s why I got you food.”

 

“Where’d you get the money from?”

 

“You.”

 

“You stole from me?”

 

“It’s hardly stealing. I bought you food with your own money. Not like I took it all and used it on myself.”

 

“Those punks were right.” She took the food from him. “You are a prick.”

 

“Yeah, you’re welcome.”

 

She couldn’t help but chuckle. She then opened the to-go box and started eating. “How’d you know to bring me here?”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“I’ve been hiding out here.”

 

He paused. “This is my hideout.”

 

“C’mon, no it’s not.”

 

“Who the hell do you think broke the window?”

 

She shook her head. “Out of all the empty houses here, how could we both have possibly chosen the same one to hide out in?”

 

“Beats me.”

 

“And how have we never run into each other here before?”

 

“I ain’t here all that much.”

 

“Ah.”

 

They fell silent as Kirika continued eating. The stranger sat on the floor, leaning against the wall nearest the futon. He tilted his head back and closed his eyes. She watched him closely, questioning Idun’s curiosity with him. Aside from the fact that she knew he was the guy she had run into that one night who had disappeared on her. Even if he did deny it, she knew it had been him. Hmm. This stranger was treating Kirika a lot like how she was treating the other guy.

 

“Hey,” she spoke up. He popped an eye open. She held the box of food out to him. “You want the rest of this?”

 

“I ain’t the one who needs it. You do.”

 

“Can’t eat too much at once or else I’ll get sick. Gotta pace myself at first.”

 

“That because of the concussion or do you just starve yourself that often?”

 

“Tch. You want it or not?”

 

He paused before getting up to take the food from her. “Speaking of which, the hell were you thinking starving yourself after getting a frigging concussion.”

 

“I was not starving myself.”

 

“You said yourself you hadn’t eaten in a week.”

 

“Haven’t been hungry.”

 

“Bullshit.”

 

“There you go again, sucking at pretending not to care.”

 

“Damn, you’re aggravating.” He eyed her thoughtfully. “For someone with such a tough attitude, though, you don’t seem to care very much about yourself.”

 

She pursed her lips. “For someone who doesn’t even know my name, you seem pretty quick to judge me.”

 

“Whatever.” He paused. “You should probably get some more rest.”

 

She wanted to argue, but she knew he was right. And Idun knew he was right. So Kirika didn’t bother saying anything at all. Instead, she lay back, facing away from the stranger. Usually she would never turn her back on someone she didn’t know, but Idun reassured her she would be safe. And she always trusted her instincts.


	17. May 24th, 2009

The stranger disappeared again after that day. Not that Kirika was complaining. She had other things to focus on rather than where else he was hiding out. For instance, taking care of herself. That needed to be her top priority. Not a couple of strangers who meant nothing to her.

 

After taking it easy for a few days—only going out into the world for food necessities—she decided to actually venture into the city. It had been a while, so she set up her mini reading station at Iwatodai. She got a few excited citizens; people explaining how their friends how talked all about this mystery girl who read people’s palms and cards and how accurate she had been thus far. Kirika resisted the urge to laugh. These were all the people who relied on psychics to plan their futures for them.

 

Once she wrapped things up, she decided to take a walk to the Shrine. When she arrived, the only other person present was a little girl. The same little girl from Golden Week. She recognised Kirika and begged her to play with her. So she did. They played together on the jungle gym until the young girl had to return home. By that point is was around 5:30 in the evening. As soon as she was alone, she took a seat on a bench and closed her eyes. She wasn’t tired, but it sure felt nice to be able to relax.

 

“Hello?” a male voice soon said.

 

Her eyes fluttered open to see a white head of hair jogging in place. “Fancy meeting you here,” she said, sitting up straight.

 

He chuckled a bit. “Fall asleep?”

 

“Nah, just resting my eyes.” She looked him up and down. “And you’re training again, I presume?”

 

“Yeah, doctor says I’m finally fully healed.” He punched a fist into the air. “Feels good to be back.”

 

“I bet.”

 

“You’re looking better, too.”

 

She lightly brushed her lip, which was no longer swollen. Just scarred. “Yeah, well, still getting dizzy here and there.”

 

“Concussions will do that to you.”

 

“Least I didn’t break any ribs. Can’t say the same for the other guy.”

 

“How’s his condition?”

 

“The hell would I know? I don’t give a shit how his recovery process goes. Prick got what was coming to him.”

 

“Hmm.” He paused. “Y’know, I’m still thinking about what you said the other day,” he changed the subject. “Or what you almost said, at least.”

 

“Not sure what you’re talking about.” That was a lie.

 

“About not wanting to get caught during… _something_.”

 

She raised an eyebrow at him. “During…a storm?”

 

He sighed. “No, that wasn’t what you were going to say.”

 

“How do you know? Can you read minds?”

 

He couldn’t help but smile at this. “Yeah, I think I finally just figured out why you seem so familiar.”

 

Now she paused. He couldn’t have just pieced together that she was the one who helped him escape that night… Could he have? She shook her head. “And why’s that?”

 

“You remind me of someone else I know.”

 

“Is that so?” She folded her arms across her chest, leaning back on the bench. “Would this be a good or bad reminder?”

 

He paused, as if he had to really think about it. “Good,” he said at last.

 

“You don’t seem so sure about that.”

 

He chuckled. “No, I’m sure.”

 

“Then I apologise that you have to deal with someone else like me.”

 

He shook his head at her. “Oh, how do you think you did on the exams?” he then asked, changing the subject again.

 

“Excuse me?”

 

This caused him to finally stop jogging. “Do you not go to Gekkoukan?”

 

“I don’t go to any school.”

 

“Oh. Are you homeschooled?”

 

“I don’t have a home, so I’m gonna go with no for that one.”

 

He furrowed his brow. “What do you mean you don’t have a home?”

 

She shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t really know how else to explain it.”

 

He was taken aback by this. “I-I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to assume…”

 

“No worries.” She checked her wristwatch. 6:15. “I should get going,” she said, getting back to her feet.

 

“Where you heading?” He started jogging in place again. “Maybe I could jog along with you.”

 

“Oh, you really don’t have to do that.”

 

“I don’t mind.”

 

“Really. It’s fine.”

 

“Hmm. All right. Maybe I’ll see you around, then.”

 

With that, he took off. Kirika sighed and headed back to the abandoned houses. By the time she got back there, it was almost seven o’clock. There was still no sign of the stranger with the beanie. Damn it. Why did she care so much about his whereabouts? Actually, no, she didn’t care. Idun cared. But Idun had to get over it. One way or another.

 

She crawled onto the futon to lay down. Then she thought about how she really hadn’t taken the time to explore the rest of this brick house yet. She was sure there wasn’t much to it, but of course Idun would make her believe something extravagant lies deeper within the dust. Leave it to Idun to turn something so strange into something so familiar. Then again, perhaps that was another form of protection.


	18. May 29th, 2009

During the next few days, Kirika spent most of her time reading strangers’ palms and doing tarot readings. Except this time she set up outside Paulownia Mall. It was a high traffic area, so she ended up with a good amount of business. Plus a couple complaints. Officer Kurosawa had to observe her at one point to make sure she wasn’t doing anything shady. And the people who had complained were none too happy once he gave her the clear to continue what she was doing. It was harmless, after all.

 

Next thing she knew, the sun had set and the moon had risen. She wasn’t sure where the day had gone, but somehow it was already 11:30. So she wrapped things up and made her way for Port Island Station. There weren’t very many other people around, aside from some people who seemed to have just been standing on the sidelines. Unmoving. Gazing into nothing.

 

“You ain’t gonna make it in time,” a male voice said.

 

She turned to see the stranger with the beanie. “The hell you talking about?”

 

“It’ll hit midnight before the tram arrives.”

 

She looked at her watch. 11:48. “So what does that mean?”

 

“It means you’re not gonna make it.”

 

She let out a heavy sigh. “Then what do you suggest?”

 

“Follow me.” He turned and walked away.

 

She didn’t move right away. Instead, she looked around at the couple of people who were standing around, seemingly empty. She shivered before rising to her feet, rushing to catch up with the stranger. “Hey, what’s with those people?” She pointed at the few people she had noticed. “It’s creepy.”

 

“They’re some of the ones suffering.”

 

“Suffering?”

 

“Yeah…” He raised an eyebrow at her. “They have Apathy Syndrome.”

 

“You say that like I’m supposed to know what it is.”

 

Now he furrowed his brow. “Haven’t you been in the city for at least two months? You’ve seriously never encountered the Lost?”

 

She paused, feeling significantly more stupid. “Please don’t make me repeat that last part in a questioning tone as well.”

 

“Wow.” He sighed out of exasperation. “Hell, do you even pay attention? These affected people are everywhere. It’s practically the only thing ever talked about.”

 

“Well, what—? How—? Why—?”

 

“Could you finish at least one question?”

 

She swallowed hard. “I don’t know what to ask.”

 

“Then I can’t give you any answers.”

 

Just then, the atmosphere shifted. The few other people who were out and about turned into coffins. The air filled with that strange green haze. Blood seeped from the ground. A chill swept over Kirika’s body.

 

“An extra hour between one day and the next,” she said, her voice low. “I don’t think I’ll ever get used to this.”

 

“That may not be such a bad thing.”

 

All of a sudden, the sound of screaming filled the air. She froze and looked in the direction it had come from, but the stranger kept on moving.

 

“Don’t stop,” he said. “You become easier prey that way.”

 

Another scream.

 

“We should go see what’s happening,” she said.

 

“I ain’t getting involved.”

 

“C’mon, we may be able to help.”

 

“There ain’t shit either of us can do.”

 

She clenched her jaw. “Fine. You go on ahead. I’m gonna go check things out.”

 

“You’re shitting me, right?” He paused as he watched her walk away. “I ain’t going after you.” That didn’t stop her. “Whatever.”

 

She didn’t look back. She just kept on walking towards where it sounded like the screams had come from.

 

Soon enough, she came across the high school. Except it was no longer the high school. In its place was a giant tower that seemed to stretch up to the oversized moon. She walked forward, craning her neck to get a glimpse of the highest part of it. She couldn’t believe she had never spotted this tower before with how high it reached. It seemed to just go on forever.

 

She shook her head. She couldn’t let this thing distract her. She was already on a mission.  She still had to figure out where the screaming had come from. The only issue was that things had quieted down again. So she stopped and listened…

 

A third scream sounded off. That was when Idun made her break out into a run. And so she ran until—

 

“Please! You have to help me! Please!” the woman who had been screaming practically toppled onto Kirika, grabbing hold of her hoodie. She held on tight, too. “Please, don’t let it get me! Don’t let it take me! Just keep it away from me! Please!”

 

“What are you talking about?”

 

“Get it away…”

 

She kept repeating those three words as Kirika backed away from her. She attempted to pry her off her clothes, but it was no use. The woman’s grip was far too strong, and she didn’t understand that. Idun wasn’t fond of it, though. Idun wanted the woman to get off her. Now. But she still didn’t feel endangered enough to be released.

 

Then she saw it. Another one of those creatures. Except it wasn’t a big one. It was one of the small ones; the same type she had seen the man get attacked by. And it was heading straight for the woman.

 

“It’s coming!” she said in a panic. “Help me! Please! Make it go away! Make it disappear! You have to do something! Just get rid of it!”

 

“Let go,” Kirika said. “I can only help if you let go.”

 

“No! No, if I let go then you’ll leave me here to die! And if I go down, then I’m taking you down with me!”

 

Her eyes widened a bit at the woman’s insanity. “Let go so I can help you,” she said again. “I’ll be able to get a better advantage if—”

 

“If you have enough time to run,” she said. “But you’re not going anywhere.”

 

All of sudden, there were hands on the woman’s shoulders. They practically ripped her off Kirika and pushed her aside. Out of shock, she stumbled to the ground. Then she saw who it was.

 

“I thought you said you weren’t coming after me,” she said.

 

“I thought you were smarter than this,” the stranger said, holding out a hand to help her back to her feet.

 

The woman screamed again. The creature had reached her and now… Well, there was a lot of blood. Kirika had to look away; she couldn’t bear to watch this time.

 

“Run,” he said, his voice sharp.

 

They took off running and neither of them looked back. Then they didn’t stop until they reached the mall. They figured that was far enough.

 

“I’ve seen that happen twice now,” Kirika spoke up as she tried to catch her breath. “Not gonna lie, it’s pretty frigging disturbing.”

 

“Let’s just hope we got away from the damn thing.”

 

“I dunno. I still have a pretty uneasy feeling.”

 

Just then, the stranger fell to the ground. And that was when she noticed the creature on his leg.

 

“Idun,” she called out without giving it a second thought.

 

There was a flash of light and the presence within her emerged. The creature dissolved and Kirika helped the guy back to his feet. Without saying anything else, they started running again. Hell, she couldn’t remember the last time she had run this much. Except that was a lie; she could remember.

 

She had been eleven years old.

 

She shook her head, pushing that memory out of her mind. She focused on the task at hand that particular night. That’s was what mattered at the moment.

 

Until, that is, they arrived at the Moonlight Bridge. She stopped dead in her tracks.

 

“The hell do you think you’re doing?” he said.

 

“I can’t.” She shook her head. “I can’t go across this bridge.”

 

“You’re gonna have to. It’ll take a little longer, but it’s the only way into Iwatodai at this hour.”

 

“I’m sorry, but I can’t. Just go without me.”

 

Idun shoved her forward. She was so surprised by the action, she ended up falling to her hands and knees. The stranger pulled her back to her feet again and proceeded to pull her across the bridge before she could even react to the scenario. At this point, though, there was no hiding from it.

 

After what seemed like forever, they made it back to the brick house. That was when Idun disappeared back inside Kirika. The stranger didn’t even bother asking any questions. They both just climbed inside and collapsed to the floor. After all, they were more than exhausted. So they fell asleep instantaneously.


	19. May 30th, 2009

Kirika woke up first the next morning. And it was still morning. Despite her exhaustion, she couldn’t stay asleep. So, she gave up on trying and just stayed awake. She glanced over at the stranger on the floor beside her, still fast asleep. She envied him for that, and decided she didn’t want to remain there. So, she took this opportunity to wander around the house instead.

 

She made her way straight for the second level of the house. She moved deliberately, partly in attempt to keep the stairs from creaking as much as possible. When she reached the top, she took note of the long hallway that led in both directions. She went to the right first. There were two doors down this way. The first door was simply a closet. Then the second door was only a bathroom. So she backtracked and went left where there were three more doors. The first door opened up to a bedroom. A large bedroom. There were a couple windows and bureaus and a bed that looked like it had only ever been touched by dust. She took it in for a moment before making her way to the next door. This one led to another bedroom. A smaller bedroom. The room of a young child.

 

Her breath caught in her throat as she stepped through the doorway. Dust shifted under her feet before taking to the air and sparkling in the sunlight. This room had an entirely different feel to it. The bed was unkempt, and a couple of the drawers in the bureau were hanging open. This room felt abandoned. It was lacking the memories that never had the chance to be made…

 

There was a hand on her shoulder.

 

“We need to talk,” the stranger said.

 

She swallowed hard. “I had a feeling.”

 

The two of them headed downstairs together. They seated themselves on the futon, facing each other. For a long while, neither of them said a word. Then he shifted with a sigh.

 

“Last night,” he spoke up, “you did something kinda incredible.”

 

She couldn’t meet his eyes. “I don’t know what it is or why I have it, but—”

 

“Persona,” he said. “You’re a Persona-user.”

 

“I’m assuming you are, too, given the fact you know what it is.”

 

He nodded his head once. “Yeah, I am. But I haven’t used my Persona ability in almost two years.”

 

“Why not?”

 

“Long story. How did you summon yours, though?”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“Me and the others had to use an Evoker—”

 

“The others? So…there are more people like us out there?”

 

“Shut up, that ain’t the point right now. The point is that we have to use something called an Evoker to summon our Personas. You didn’t use anything.”

 

An Evoker. Huh. That had to be the gun-like object she used before when she helped the white-haired stranger that one night. “I—I’m not sure why that is,” Kirika then said. She was trying so hard to keep her voice from shaking. “All I really know is that she only materialises when I’m in extreme danger. Other than that, I can never get her to come out.” She paused. “She also causes me to black out if I’ve already been injured, even if it’s during the regular hours of the day.”

 

“Like when you got attacked.”

 

“Exactly.”

 

“So, it doesn’t necessarily have to be the Dark Hour for you.”

 

“Guess not.” She thought for a moment. “Last night, though, was the first time she’s ever emerged to help someone else who was in danger.”

 

“Hmm. Maybe she sensed that I have a similar power.”

 

“Maybe.”

 

They fell silent. Kirika’s hands were folded tightly on her lap and she was looking down at them, twiddling her thumbs. The stranger had his back against the wall, his hands still stuffed in his pockets.

 

“What are those creatures called?” she broke the silence.

 

“Shadows,” he said. “They feed on human minds. Human consciousness. That’s what causes Apathy Syndrome.”

 

“Why those people?”

 

“They’re people who have the Potential, but don’t live up to it.”

 

“They have the Potential?”

 

“To also be a Persona-user.”

 

“Oh.”

 

“Yeah. That’s why some people don’t always transmogrify during the Dark Hour.”

 

“Transmogrify? You mean turn into coffins.”

 

“Right. And when someone doesn’t transmogrify, they attract Shadows. Then when they don’t awaken to their unknown Potential, they’re preyed upon and—Well…you saw what happened.”

 

She nodded. “Yeah.” She checked her wristwatch. “Ugh. I can’t believe it’s not even nine o’clock yet. Doesn’t even feel like I slept.”

 

“No kidding,” he said, seeming just as glad to be getting away from the subject. “By the way…Aragaki.”

 

“Hmm?”

 

“My name. It’s Shinjiro Aragaki.” He shrugged his shoulders. “I mean, you kinda saved my life last night, so I guess we’re at that point…whether we want to be or not.”

 

“And what point would that be?”

 

“Tch. I was perfectly content never giving you my name and never knowing yours, but now I just feel like I owe you.”

 

She chuckled under her breath. “Kirika Nishioka,” she then said. “And you are officially the first person I have ever introduced myself to. Aside from cops, at least.”

 

He raised an eyebrow at her. “Are you serious?”

 

“Pretty pathetic, huh?”

 

“No shit.” He got to his feet. “C’mon, let’s go gab a cup of coffee or something.”

 

She didn’t respond, only followed his lead. They left the brick house and made their way for Paulownia Mall. For the entire walk, though, the feeling that child’s bedroom had given Kirika stayed with her.

 

The feeling of lost innocence.


	20. May 31st, 2009

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not sure if I've mentioned this already or if it's already come up in previous scenes, but for this fic I've decided that to-go coffees are a thing for the cafe at the mall whose name honestly escapes me at this one particular moment in time lol Either way, yeah, I'm not sure how big to-go coffee shops and whatnot actually are in Japan, but I just felt it worked better for some scenes/parts for the place to have a to-go option. I apologise in advance if that bugs anyone, but I guess it can be considered a "headcanon" of sorts, haha

Once again, Kirika woke up before Shinjiro that morning. She let him be, again, and left the house. She made her way for the mall, grabbing two coffees to-go. Then she made her way back to the brick house. By the time she returned, Shinjiro had woken up. She held out the cup for him, but he only raised an eyebrow at her.

 

“It’s coffee,” she said.

 

He took the cup. “It ain’t healthy to drink coffee so often.”

 

“It also ain’t healthy to starve yourself for a week, but that hasn’t stopped me.”

 

“Tch. That supposed to be funny?” He paused. “Y’know, you look pretty worn out.”

 

“Do I?” She took a sip of her coffee. “Thanks.”

 

“No amount of coffee will change that. Especially if you’re getting sick.”

 

“I’m not sick.”

 

“Whatever.”

 

They fell silent. Kirika moved into the adjacent room, curling up on the futon. Shinjiro didn’t follow her. Not that she had expected him to. She brought her knees to her chest as she nursed her coffee. After about ten minutes, Shinjiro entered the room and sat down beside her. They remained quiet.

 

“I, uhm, feel like we didn’t really finish our conversation yesterday morning,” she spoke up once another few minutes passed. “I mean, it ended kinda abruptly.”

 

“Yeah, I guess I did have a couple more questions,” he said.

 

Kirika shifted a bit. Maybe she shouldn’t have brought this up. “Like what?” she asked anyway.

 

“Well…” He cleared his throat. “When did you discover your abilities?”

 

She took a deep breath. “I was eleven, and I hated them right away. I wanted absolutely nothing to do with them, but I just couldn’t get rid of them. Of course, I couldn’t control them, either. I’ve gotten better at it since, but…y’know, it’s hard to practice something like that. Not like I could’ve gone out and found a trainer or someone to practice with, right?” She chuckled before sighing. “Either way, yeah, I was eleven.”

 

“That’s pretty young. How did it happen?”

 

Now she shook her head. “I’d rather not say.”

 

“That have something to do with your resentment towards them.”

 

She pursed her lips. “Yeah.”

 

“I’ll leave it at that, then.” He paused. “So, what about your hatred with the bridge? You were hellbent on not crossing it the other night.”

 

“I honestly don’t have an answer for that one. There’s just something off-putting about it. Not entirely sure why yet.”

 

“Yet?”

 

“Idun, my…” she struggled for a moment to remember the proper word, “…Persona, She, uhm, almost gives me this sixth sense that acts as a warning of some sort.” She shook her head. “It’s difficult to explain.”

 

“Got it. Hmm.” He paused. “What exactly are your abilities, then? I mean, the way you took out that Shadow was an attack I had never seen before.”

 

“That’s because it wasn’t a technical attack. My Persona isn’t a fighter; she’s a defender. That’s how I like to think of her, at least. As a protector. I don’t believe in fighting, but I know how to handle and take care of myself. Whenever I’m in danger, though, she shows up and protects me. Uses some sort of shield or force field or whatever until I’m able to reach safety. If I’ve already been injured, though… Well, we kinda discussed that already. I mean, that’s when things get complicated.”

 

“Right. That punk you beat the shit out of,” Shinjiro said.

 

“Exactly. She caused me to black out, so she was in control, even though she hadn’t been summoned. She was still defending me. And sometimes she just takes it too far.”

 

“How often has that happened?”

 

“Only in extreme situations.” She paused. “She can heal me, as well. I’m not sure about the extent of that ability yet since I’ve never been severely injured, but it comes in handy nonetheless. I also recover from injuries much more quickly than what’s considered to be normal.”

 

“If you heal someone else, does their recovery process quicken as well?”

 

“I’m not so sure about that, either. I’ve never had the chance to heal another person.”

 

“Huh.” He thought for a moment. “Not gonna lie, that’s pretty impressive.”

 

“Tch. What about you? What are your abilities?”

 

“My Persona is a fighter through and through.”

 

“Go figure.”

 

“Shut up.” He shook his head at her. “He doesn’t really have any particular skills, just a wide assortment of physical attacks.”

 

“And why has it been almost two years since you last summoned him?”

 

“I’d rather not say.”

 

“Fair enough.”

 

Silence fell between them once again. Kirika put the empty coffee cup down beside the futon and leaned against the wall. She closed her eyes. “Think that’s enough real talk for one day,” she spoke up.

 

Shinjiro chuckled a bit. “Something we can agree on.”

 

“Hold on, is that an actual smile? Wow, I thought your face was permanently stuck in a frown.”

 

“Tch. Shut up.” He rose to his feet. “If we’re done here, then I’m leaving.”

 

“Okay.”

 

He paused. He looked as if he wanted to say something else but kept quiet. Instead, he just left. She remained on the futon, ignoring his exit. She brought her knees back into herself. Idun had withdrawn deeper within her. Discussing the past always caused that sort of reaction. It was another reason Kirika avoided the topic. Talking about it meant reliving it. And reliving it meant—

 

She took a deep breath, shaking the thoughts out of her head. Exhaustion was settling in again, and she decided sleeping might be a good thing for once. So, she lay down and closed her eyes. And it didn’t take long for her to lose herself.

 

Nor did it take long for the nightmares to find her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We've finally reached the end of the second month!! See, it's not that bad... At least, I hope it isn't x3 lmao  
> Thanks to everyone who's been checking out this fic so far, and thanks to everyone else who's keeping up with it.


	21. June 5th, 2009

After not seeing Shinjiro for a few days, Kirika returned to the brick house one evening to find him there. He didn’t say anything to her, and she didn’t say anything to him either. At first. But she had been reading the palms of a lot of high schoolers lately, so she had heard quite a few rumours.

 

“Hey, do you go to Gekkoukan?” she broke the silence.

 

“I used to.”

 

“Oh. Have you graduated?”

 

“Nope. Just stopped going. Why?”

 

“Nothing, it’s just…” She shrugged her shoulders. “Well, I’ve been hearing some strange rumours about the high school lately. It’s not the first rumour I’ve heard about the school, either. Is Gekkoukan always this active?”

 

“I dunno. I guess.”

 

“Well, this is the most interesting one I’ve heard so far.”

 

“I’m gonna stop you right there to let you know that I don’t give a shit.”

 

She paused. “Yeah, I’m gonna tell you anyway.” He sighed, but she still got ready to keep going. “So, this rumour is about how the school is allegedly being haunted by some ghost that eats its victims or whatever.” He raised an eyebrow at her. “I know. It’s ridiculous. Apparently, a few days ago, though, a female student was found unconscious on the school grounds and sent to the hospital. Since then there are have been two other similar incidents with female students being found unconscious. They were each seen entering the school after hours, and then they were discovered the following mornings. The three girls are from the same class, as well, and they would hang out together a lot.”

 

“How the hell do you know all this?”

 

“I read palms and do tarot readings in my spare time to earn money.”

 

“And why are you telling me this?”

 

“Why do you feel the need to interrupt me?”

 

“Because I really don’t give a shit.”

 

“Guess where it’s rumoured that they always hung out, though.”

 

“I’m gonna say it one more time—”

 

“That back alley you’re so fond of.”

 

“Tch. I ain’t fond of that place.”

 

“Uhm, yeah, pretty sure that’s where you always disappear to, and you disappear every single day.”

 

Now he sighed. “Whatever. What is this even about?”

 

“I was just thinking about the initial cause of the incidents. I mean, rumour has it that they entered the school after hours. No one seems to understand why, though. So I have a theory.”

 

“Of course you do.”

 

“The school turns into that weird tower thing during the Dark Hour, correct?”

 

“Tartarus.”

 

“Everything has a name, doesn’t it?”

 

“Shut up and finish your damn explanation.”

 

“Oh?” She smirked. “Have I peeked your interest?”

 

“No. The sooner you finish, though, the sooner I don’t have to hear your voice.”

 

She rolled her eyes. “Fine. So, the school turns into _Tartarus_. And that does happen every night, yeah?”

 

“Yes, it’s a nightly thing.”

 

“Okay, bear with me here.” She took a deep breath. “What if these girls got stuck in this tower during the Dark Hour, and then got spit out or something once it was over? That could be why they’re being found unconscious.”

 

He considered this for a moment. “Tartarus is like the Shadows’ nest, though. If they got caught in there, then…they’d become part of the Lost. Or worse.”

 

“Yes, but apparently they’re not showing the same symptoms of Apathy Syndrome,” she went on. “So maybe there’s an area inside where there aren’t any Shadows present.”

 

“How could they be so lucky?”

 

“I dunno. Maybe the tower is just as alive as the Shadows. Maybe it senses that they’re not Persona-users and spares them.”

 

“Tartarus ain’t a living and breathing organism.”

 

“How would you know?”

 

He sighed. “Whatever. Are you done now?”

 

“Aren’t you intrigued?”

 

“Not really.”

 

“Oh, c’mon, we should investigate this. Maybe we could sneak onto the school grounds and—”

 

“I stopped attending that school, and you never even attended it to begin with,” he said. “Sneaking onto the grounds would not be the smartest idea.”

 

“Where’s your sense of adventure, Aragaki?”

 

“Don’t have one.”

 

“Don’t make me go alone.”

 

“I promise, Nishioka, I won’t come after you.”

 

“That’s what you said last time.”

 

“And I mean it this time.” He shook his head at her. “Seriously, don’t get involved with something that don’t even concern you.”

 

“But—”

 

“Leave it alone.”

 

Now she sighed. “Fine.”

 

That was the end of it. Soon after, Shinjiro ended up leaving and Kirika was left alone. That was normal. She was more than used to being on her own. When she was on her own, though, she had more time to think. And that wasn’t always a good thing. Especially now with the rumour she’d heard and her curiosity peaked. She was more than tempted to venture into the night and investigate her theory. She had a feeling Shinjiro would find out somehow, though.

 

“Leave it alone,” she repeated his words. “Just leave it alone.”


	22. June 6th, 2009

Come the next day, Kirika was still thinking about the rumour and her theory. She still wanted to investigate, too. And no matter how many times she repeated _leave it alone_ , it would not sway her curiosity. So she decided that that night she would stop by the back alley to check it out for any sort of suspicious behaviour. Better yet, she would remain there throughout the Dark Hour.

 

Of course, Shinjiro wouldn’t be hearing about this. Sure, she still had a feeling he’d find out about it one way or another, but not until after the fact. And by that point, it would no longer matter.

 

So, she spent the morning at the strip mall, her reading station all set up. She got some new customers, and a few returning customers. By late afternoon, she packed up to make her way to Paulownia Mall. She stopped at the pharmacy first, picking up a couple things she thought might be…essential. Then she crossed the mall to go to the café. Coffee was definitely essential.

 

As she sat drinking her second cup of coffee, she could feel her heart racing. Not from the caffeine, though. It was due to the anticipation. She didn’t get why since it’s not like she was afraid of her plan. Or going back to the alley. She had no reason to be afraid. But that didn’t stop Idun from nagging at her. Nagging and trying to change her mind and make her believe it was a bad idea. No. Kirika wasn’t gonna listen this time because her gut was telling her to follow through.

 

Yet another thing she didn’t quite understand was her determination and stubbornness to investigate this theory of hers. Shinjiro was right, after all; it had nothing to do with her. She wasn’t involved with the situation in any way or form. So why was she so damn set on figuring out the truth behind this rumour?

 

She shook her head of the thoughts. It was too late to change her mind now. Even if Idun was under the impression she still could. Kirika wasn’t going to back down, though.

 

After her third cup of coffee, she left the shop. She made her way to Port Island Station, the sun already setting. By the time she arrived at the alley, the sky had darkened. She stood at the entrance and took a deep breath. Upon stepping into the alley, she got a few glances thrown her way. The punks hanging around acknowledged her, but didn’t act on anything. Instead, they just whispered to one another. Rather than confront them, she chose to ignore them. She didn’t need a second hospitalisation due to another black out because of Idun’s short temper. So, she returned to the small corner of the alley she had always stayed in before and blended into the background as much as she could.

 

Nothing eventful happened as the night dragged on. But then three more people showed up. A girl, a guy wearing a backwards baseball cap—who looked vaguely familiar—and a teen with blue hair. This sparked her interest, but she remained in her corner, containing herself. And Idun.

 

“The hell?” one of the punks said.

 

“Check out those rags,” another guy said. “They’re from Gekko High.”

 

“Oh man, this is worse than I thought,” the guy with the baseball cap said.

 

“Hey, you, I think you’re in the wrong place,” the first guy said.

 

“Uh…well, I—” the one with the baseball cap said. Or tried to say, at least.

 

“You don’t belong here. Get it? Beat it, Goatee.”

 

“G-goatee? Oh, y-you mean me…”

 

“We don’t need your permission to be here,” the girl said.

 

His eyes widened. “H-hey, are you nuts? Take a look around you.”

 

“I’m not blind, y’know.” She faced the boys who had accompanied her. “C’mon, don’t be intimidated by these scum.”

 

“What was that?” the original guy said, clearly taking offence to the comment.

 

“She just called us scum,” one of the punk girls said.

 

“Let’s get ‘em,” a second girl said. “Who cares where they’re from?”

 

“We’ll post some pictures that will make her daddy cry,” the first girl said. “She’ll wish she was never born.”

 

The other girl laughed as if that was the funniest thing she had ever heard. “Oh, that’s so clever.”

 

“These guys are the worst…” the Gekkoukan High girl said.

 

“You oughta learn to shut that trap of yours,” the original punk said. “Man, I feel sorry for you, Goatee. This bitch is a pain in the ass.”

 

With that, he punched the guy with the baseball cap in the gut and he crouched down in the pain.

 

The girl’s eyes widened. “Junpei!”

 

The punks closed in on the three of them.

 

“Hey, pretty boy,” the original said to the blue-haired teen. “I don’t like your face, either. Got anything to say before I beat it to a bloody pulp?”

 

The others laughed.

 

That was the final straw. Kirika couldn’t keep Idun calm any longer, and she made her step in.

 

“No, but I do,” she said. She stepped up to the punk. “Back off.”

 

Now he laughed in her face. “The hell you gonna do to me?”

 

“Dude, that’s the same girl,” the second punk said.

 

She smirked at this. They remembered her for that incident. Good. She then stepped up to the instigator. “Let’s find out.”

 

“That’s enough,” another male voice said. She froze before turning to see Shinjiro. She avoided meeting his gaze. “They didn’t know what they were getting into. I’ll make sure they leave. All right?”

 

“Who do you think you are, dumbass?” the punk said. “You want some, too?”

 

He sighed. “Do I have a choice?”

 

“That’s it, you’re going down.”

 

The punk pushed Kirika aside, knocking her off balance, and charged at Shinjiro. Before he could even throw a punch, though, Shinjiro grabbed him by his shirt and head-butted him. The guy fell straight on his ass while Shinjiro kept his composure, both hands back in his pockets already.

 

“Shit,” the punk said.

 

“Damn you, Shinjiro,” the second punk said. Then he seemed to have a sort of realisation. “That’s right, you’re from Gekko High, too, aren’t you?” He scoffed. “I thought you were one of us.”

 

“What gave you that idea?” Shinjiro said. “I don’t remember swearing a blood oath.”

 

The original punk got back to his feet. “You son of a bitch. You just crossed the line. You think you’re going home alive?”

 

Kirika jumped back to her feet, moving in front of Shinjiro, but he only pushed her aside again. “Sure do,” he said. “Wanna give it a try?”

 

“Uh…” He swallowed hard. “S-screw this…”

 

The girls laughed some more. “What a loser,” they said.

 

“You better grow eyes in the back of your head,” the second punk said.

 

“You better grow a spine,” Kirika called after him.

 

He scoffed at her, and the group took off. Once they were gone, the kid by name of Junpei stood back up.

 

Kirika faced Shinjiro. “Your head okay?” she checked with a low voice.

 

“Oh man, Senpai, that was awesome,” Junpei then said.

 

“You idiots,” Shinjiro said, ignoring Kirika’s question. “Get outta here. This place isn’t for you.” He turned to walk away.

 

“Wait,” the girl stopped him. “We came here for a reason.”

 

“You guys… You were at the hospital.” Shinjiro stepped up to them. “Did Aki tell you to come here?”

 

“No, he didn’t,” the blue-haired teen said.

 

“Hmph.” He paused. “What do you wanna know? About that ghost story?”

 

“Uhm, yeah,” the girl said. “How’d you know?”

 

Shinjiro moved to the stairs to sit down and the other three followed him. “It’s a rumour,” he went on. “Those girls who wound up in the hospital were here talking shit every night about all the things they’d done to some girl named Fuuka.”

 

Kirika clenched her jaw at this. He had originally acted as if he didn’t know anything about the rumour. As if he didn’t care. Ugh.

 

“Fuuka?” Junpei said. “You mean Fuuka Yamagishi, from 2-E? They were picking on her?”

 

“That’s why people are saying it’s Fuuka’s spirit that did it. I hear it’s all over the net, too.”

 

Now Kirika folded her arms across her chest. She was growing more and more livid by this information.

 

“Fuuka’s spirit?” the girl said. “Wait, what do you mean by that?”

 

Shinjiro’s brow furrowed. “You guys don’t know? This Fuuka girl might be dead. She hasn’t been home in over a week. Don’t you guys go to the same school? How do you not know this?”

 

“How do you know all this?” Kirika finally spoke up. Shinjiro cocked his head towards her general direction, but didn’t fully acknowledge her.

 

“Wait, are you serious?” Junpei went on, his eyes wide. “I thought she was out sick, but…she’s missing?”

 

“So much for the ghost story,” the girl said. “Mr. Ekoda is the homeroom teacher for 2-E, right? Does he know about this?”

 

Now Shinjiro stood up. “I get it, Aki,” he said, more to himself than anyone of the others. “Still trying to make up for the past.” He shook his head. “It’s you who can’t let go…” The other three looked at him, puzzled. “Nothing.” He cleared his throat. “That’s all I know. Satisfied?”

 

Junpei bowed. “Y-yeah. Thanks, Senpai.” He looked towards his friends. “C’mon, show some appreciation.”

 

The other two also bowed at this.

 

“Thanks,” the girl said. “You totally helped us out.” She smiled. “You’re very kind.”

 

Shinjiro raised an eyebrow at her. “Huh?”

 

“I…uhm…never mind.”

 

“Tch. Don’t come here again.”

 

With that, Shinjiro walked off. Kirika went to follow him but looked towards the other three instead. “You guys okay getting back home?”

 

The girl nodded. “We should be fine. Thanks, though.”

 

“Yeah. Y’know, just…instinct.”

 

“Wait, what do you—?”

 

Kirika was going after Shinjiro before the girl could even finish her sentence. She caught up to him, pent up frustration ready to come out. “The hell was that?” she said. “I thought you didn’t give a shit. Yet you just spewed the entire rumour plus some.”

 

“What does it matter to you?”

 

“What was the point in lying to me?” She sighed, exasperated. “And I didn’t realise you hung out at the alley enough for them to think you were one of them.”

 

“First of all, I figured if I didn’t show an interest in it, it would deter your interest. Second of all, why do you even care? It ain’t like we’re friends.”

 

She stopped. She wanted to be offended and hurt, but she couldn’t be. He was right. They weren’t friends. Just because they shared a similar ability and she saved his life and they shared a hideout…none of that made them friends. They were barely acquaintances. So why should she care? He had no reason to be honest with her.

 

“You know what?” She nodded as she started walking backwards. “You’re right. We’re not friends. And for the record, your interest in something does not affect my interest in something. I ain’t dependent like that.”

 

Now he sighed. “Nishioka…”

 

“No. Don’t’ even bother. I’m just gonna go, and I’ll be sure to keep my distance. I mean, that’s what you wanted from the start, right? I don’t even like dealing with people. They’re all the same anyway. Selfish and deceitful and—”

 

“You trying to guilt trip me or something?”

 

“All I originally wanted from you were answers, anyway,” she went on. “And you have now provided me those answers to the best of your ability. So, there’s no reason for me to keep coming around.”

 

“Would you quit it?”

 

“Sorry,” she said. “I didn’t mean to burden you.”

 

With that, she turned and walked away. She had no idea what time it was at this point, but she didn’t care. All she knew was that she didn’t feel like going back to the brick house that night. But she couldn’t return to the back alley, either. Obviously. So she had gone full circle to when she had first returned to the city.

 

She was on her own with nowhere to go.


	23. June 8th, 2009

Two days later, and Kirika had yet to interact with anyone. She had yet to eat or sleep or do anything to take care of herself. She didn’t care enough to try.

 

Come six o’clock, she found herself at the Shrine. No one else was present and she liked that. She sat down at a bench and just…breathed. There was nothing for her to be thinking about, nor did she want to worry about anything. So, she just breathed. In and out.

 

Inhale. Exhale.

 

Soon enough, she heard barking. She looked around to see a Shiba Inu running around the Shrine. She smiled as it came running over to her and sat before her.

 

“Hey, there,” she greeted the dog. “What are you doing here, boy?” He barked. “Is your owner around?” Now he whined. “Oh… Are you lost?” He walked around in a circle before sitting back down. “Hmm. I’m not exactly sure what that means, but—”

 

All of a sudden, he started running around again. Soon after, he stopped, facing her, his tail in the air and wagging.

 

Kirika laughed. “You wanna play, boy?” He barked again. “Okay, let’s play.”

 

So, she spent her evening with the dog. And after a while, she was sitting on the ground while he was still running around.

 

“You are much better company than people, you know,” she said. At this, he came over and sat beside her. She scratched him behind the ears. “You don’t lie. You watch where you’re going. Oh, and you’re _such a sweetie_.” He barked and she laughed. “What a good boy, you are. It’s a shame I’ll have to get going soon.” Now he whimpered and nuzzled her hand. “I know, I wish I didn’t have to go, either. It’s not like I can sleep here, though. pretty sure that would get me in a lot of trouble.” She paused. “Hmm. I wonder if that officer would be willing to help me out.” She then shook her head with a sigh. “Doubtful. He has better things to be doing than babysitting a teenager. More important things. Just like everyone else in the world.” She looked up towards the darkened sky and her eyes widened a bit. “It’s a full moon tonight. I wonder…” She jumped to her feet. “Sorry, boy, but I gotta get going. I’m sure I’ll see you later, though” He barked and she smiled again. “Thanks, boy.”

 

With that, Kirika took off. She didn’t know exactly where she was heading, but she knew where she needed to be.

 

Eight o’clock and she found herself halfway back to the abandoned houses. She stopped, not wanting to go in that direction. There were  a few other buildings around, one of them being a four-story building that looked like it could be an apartment complex. Or maybe even a dorm of some sort. She was pretty sure she had heard about Gekkoukan having dorms…

 

She continued down the sidewalk and away from the building. She had four hours to kill before the Dark Hour began. As she waited, she continued to check out her surroundings. It was close to the Iwatodai Strip Mall, yet she felt as if she had never been in the area before. And if she had, then she never paid attention. But what she was paying attention to now was the unsettling amount of the Lost. People with Apathy Syndrome littered the area and it made her more than uncomfortable. Sure, they were harmless, but they were also consciously dead. In a way. That’s how she understood it to be, at least.

 

Eventually, she took a seat on a bench just a couple blocks down from the building. With nowhere else to go and nothing else to do, she figured she might as well just sit and wait. Plus, Idun felt as if she should stay put. Stay close by. So, she stayed.

 

Before she knew it, it was somehow 11:45. Kirika had no idea where the time had gone, but it managed to pass much more quickly than she had been expecting it to. She hadn’t remembered falling asleep or anything, either…

 

She shook her head and got to her feet. She followed Idun’s direction and made her way back towards the building. She wasn’t sure if she should knock on the front door or just let herself in. Then again, she wasn’t sure as to why she would just let herself in. She also wasn’t sure why she was so enticed by this building in the first place. Idun was the one who pointed it out to her, though, so it had to have some sort of significance. Either way, she decided she would wait the last ten minutes until the Dark Hour to do anything.

 

When it did strike and the atmosphere changed, she stepped up to the door. She raised a hand to knock, but then she stepped away from it.

 

“Maybe I shouldn’t do this,” she said. “I have no idea who or what is through that door. It could be some sort of trap.” She sighed and sat down on the front steps. A chill swept over her, sending shivers down her spine. “Hell, the Dark Hour gets creepier and creepier each night.”

 

Just then, the door opened behind her. She jumped back to her feet and spun around to see a girl exiting the building.

 

“Uhm…hello?” she said.

 

“Fuuka…” the girl said. She seemed to almost be in some sort of trance.

 

“Fuuka?” she said. She thought for a moment, then her eyes widened. “Fuuka Yamagishi. The girl from the rumour.”

 

“Fuuka…” the girl said again.

 

“Are you okay?”

 

The girl didn’t respond. She just started walking away. Next thing Kirika knew, there were Shadows appearing in every which direction. And they were heading straight for the girl.

 

“Shit,” she said. She went after the girl. “C’mon, Idun, I know you’re in there. Help this girl. Help me keep her safe until she gets to where she needs to be. You’ve done it before and I know you can do it again.” She looked around to see the Shadows growing closer. “Shit. Idun.” Her heart was pounding as her breath caught in her throat. “Please.”

 

Finally, there was a flash of light and there she was. Idun had emerged and formed a shield around Kirika and the girl, causing the Shadows to practically bounce off them at each attempt to pounce.

 

She smiled out of relief. “Thank you.”

 

After that, Kirika simply followed the girl. She had no idea where she was leading them, but she still went along with every step. Until, that is, they found themselves at Moonlight Bridge.

 

“Shit. No, no, no, no…” She slowed down her pace a bit, but didn’t come to a complete stop. “I can’t do this. Not again. There has to be another way I can direct her.” She looked around, but it was too late; the girl was already crossing the bridge. She slowed down even more, but Idun was urging her on. “Fine, fine, okay. I’ll cross it.” She took a deep breath and continued following the girl.

 

She focused on the girl.

 

Once they made it across the bridge, Kirika let out a heavy breath. She felt as if she had been holding it in the whole way across. Rather than letting it slow her down again, though, she sped up a bit. The girl was still in that weird trance and still repeating the other girl’s name here and there. And she still had no idea where they were going, but the Shadows were showing up less and less.

 

They soon passed Paulownia Mall and kept going. That was when she finally realised where they were heading. Tartarus. She just didn’t understand why. She also wasn’t sure whether or not she should try snapping the girl out of her trance and stopping her from going inside.

 

By the time they reached the tower, the girl didn’t hesitate. She walked right through the entrance and…she was gone. Kirika stopped outside, hesitant of her next move. Curious as she was about what lied within Tartarus, going inside didn’t feel right in that moment. So, she decided she wouldn’t go any farther.

 

“This is my stop, Idun,” she said. “We can go back now.”

 

So, they turned around and started retracing their steps. By the time they reached the Moonlight Bridge, Idun dissolved inside her again.

 

“Oh, thanks a lot,” she said.

 

She decided to turn back around and make her way for Port Island Station. Crossing the bridge once in a night was exhausting enough for her. So, she decided to wait out the Dark Hour and just use the tram if she wanted to head back into Iwatodai after.

 

She was constantly looking around to make sure there weren’t any Shadows closing in on her. That was how she had spent the last couple of nights, as well, which was part of the reason why she hadn’t slept. And that didn’t really make any sense when she thought about it, given the fact that the Dark Hour was exactly that; a single hour. Despite her exhaustion, though, she just couldn’t force herself to sleep. So she didn’t. That was the issue she was having with eating, as well.

 

She sighed, her pace slowing as she passed the tower again. She wondered if the girl was safe inside. She wondered if anyone else had already been inside. Like that Fuuka girl… Maybe her theory about the people getting stuck inside the tower during the shift into the Dark Hour had been correct. Or maybe she had no idea what she was talking about. After all, there was still so much she didn’t understand.

 

Kirika closed her eyes, putting a hand to her chest. Her heart had calmed down, as had Idun. She felt them both within her, and it was soothing. That much she understood. So she reopened her eyes and continued towards the station.

 

Every so often, she glanced over her shoulder at Tartarus. It really did seem to stretch up towards the moon. Or perhaps the moon hung lower to reach the tower.


	24. June 9th, 2009

Kirika was being shaken awake. Her eyes fluttered open and, when her vision cleared, she saw Officer Kurosawa standing before her. She sat up with a start, looking around to find herself at Port Island Station. She figured she must’ve fallen asleep waiting for the Dark Hour to end and for the tram to arrive.

 

“Are you okay?” he spoke up.

 

“I think so,” she said. She rubbed her eyes. “What’s going on?”

 

“Someone called to report a young woman sleeping on a bench.”

 

“Is that a crime now?”

 

“They weren’t sure if you were maybe one of the infected?”

 

“Infected? As in those people with Apathy Syndrome? Yeah, no, I’m fine.”

 

“Did you spend all night here?”

 

She let out a little groan as she sat up straighter. “Maybe.”

 

“You mean you don’t know?”

 

“Honestly…no, I don’t remember. Then again, I have spent the two nights previously not sleeping at all, so maybe I was just that exhausted last night.”

 

He raised an eyebrow at her. “I see. Well, just be more careful about where you decide to spend your nights. Sleeping out in the open isn’t the safest idea.”

 

“Right. Sorry.”

 

“And if you need anything, Nishioka, don’t be afraid to ask.”

 

“Thanks, but I’ll pass. After all, I definitely don’t need your pity.”

 

Now he shook his head at her. “Stay out of trouble.” With that, he took his leave, making his way back in the direction of the mall.

 

Kirika slumped on the bench, letting out a heavy sigh. She still felt so exhausted. Almost like she hadn’t even slept. So, she decided to head for the mall, as well, just so she could get a cup of coffee. Once she did, she set up her reading station outside the mall. Not like she had anything else to do.

 

It was a slow day, but everyone who came to her was someone she had never seen before. And she didn’t get any other complaints, which was a plus. By four o’clock, she decided to wrap things up. One more person managed to catch her before she could fully pack up, though.

 

“Hey, I see you’re making a living for yourself now,” he said.

 

She stared at him with a raised eyebrow. “Do I know you?”

 

“Uh…I’m the owner of Club Escapade.”

 

“Ah. That’s right.” She took a deep breath. “What do you want?”

 

“My future told. That is what you do, right?”

 

“To an extent, yes.” She looked up at him again. “It’s 1415 yen.” He put the money down and she held back an eye roll. “Sit.” He did as he was told, and she sat across from him. “Palm reading first or tarot reading?”

 

“Let’s do the palm reading first.”

 

“Very well.”

 

He held out his hand and she took it. She began her introduction and he listened intently. Then she started analysing his hand, and that seemed to be when he couldn’t keep quiet any longer.

 

“I’m sorry about before,” he spoke up.

 

She kept her gaze on their hands. “Excuse me?”

 

“Y’know, about not helping you out. I should’ve just given you a job. It would’ve been harmless.”

 

“Why are you interrupting me?”

 

He leaned closer to her and she leaned away. He laughed at her reaction. “Oh, come on, there’s no reason for you to be afraid of me.”

 

“Tch. I ain’t afraid of you.” She finally dropped his hand. “There’s just no reason for you to be so close to me.”

 

“I only wanted to let you know that there’s a job position open for you.”

 

“You didn’t have to lean in to tell me that.”

 

“What is your problem?”

 

“Right now, it’s you.”

 

He laughed again. “Let me help you. Maybe we can discuss it over a meal.”

 

“Or maybe you can keep your money and get out of my face.”

 

“Don’t be like that.”

 

She pursed her lips. “Maybe you didn’t hear about what happened to the last guy I wasn’t interested in.”

 

“What are you talking about?”

 

“As far as I’m concerned, he’s still in the hospital.”

 

Now his eyes widened a bit. “You mean that punk from the alley? You’re the chick who did that to him?”

 

“Oh, good, you have heard. Maybe that’ll give you the incentive to leave, then.”

 

“Or maybe it’ll just make me even more intrigued by you.”

 

“You can’t take advantage of my helplessness because I ain’t helpless.”

 

“Perhaps not, but damn… You got some serious issues, huh?”

 

She opened her mouth to respond, but paused, swallowing hard. “No. I’m not wasting my breath on you.” She packed her things and forced the guy’s money back into his hand. “You can go now.”

 

“What’s a guy gotta do to change your mind?”

 

“What’s with all the guys in this city being pricks?”

 

He scoffed at her. “Fine. Be that way.”

 

“Well, you shouldn’t be that way. Grow up.”

 

With that, Kirika made her way for Port Island Station. She was relieved she got away without another blackout scenario. At the same time, though, she wished she could’ve punched that guy. He would’ve deserve it. Tch. She was sick of being treated like nothing more than an object. Just about every guy who spoke with her was only ever interested in what she could give. What she wouldn’t give. These guys were creeps and assholes and—

 

And maybe that was why she felt better around Shinjiro. Because he didn’t act that way. Sure, he was also a prick, but at least he treated her like an actual human being. Now that she thought about it, the other stranger was the same way. Hmm… That had to have something to do with Idun being so intrigued by the two of them. Either way, it was a breath of fresh air being able to have a normal conversation with a stranger.

 

Then again, she still wasn’t used to interacting and conversing with people on such a regular basis. So maybe she was the issue. Maybe she was unintentionally instigating these creeps. Leading them on somehow. Or maybe they simply were just creeps. That’s what Idun seemed to believe anyway. Ugh. Why was she even thinking about all this? What did it matter? All that mattered was not letting any of these guys get to her. In any way or form.


	25. June 12th, 2009

After another couple of days of Kirika keeping to herself, she found herself surrounded by people on the tram. She had spent the day at Port Island Station reading palms and tarot cards. She got a lot of theatre-goers traffic and a lot of student traffic once the high school let out. Then people became scarce, so she decided to wrap things up and head for Iwatodai to grab a quick bite to eat.

 

She boarded the tram, taking a seat as far from the other passengers as feasibly possible. It wasn’t long, though, before someone stepped up to her.

 

“Yo, how are you?” he said.

 

She looked up to see that it was the white-haired teen she’d had a few of encounters with already. “Oh, I’m fine,” she said.

 

He sat down beside her. “I haven’t seen you around the Shrine for a while.”

 

“Yeah, I’ve been busy.”

 

“Work?”

 

“You could say that.”

 

He chuckled a bit. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

 

“It means I get food in my stomach and clothes on my back, and that’s good enough for me.”

 

“What about a roof over your head?”

 

She paused. “Sometimes.”

 

“Only sometimes?”

 

“Yeah, well…” She thought for a moment, shaking her head. “Never mind.”

 

He nodded his head once. “Are you heading to the Shrine now?”

 

“No. Why?”

 

“Oh. Just wondering.”

 

They fell silent and remained silent for what seemed like forever. Every once in a while, Kirika noticed out of the corner of her eye that the guy would punch the air but kept the hits within the confines of his personal space.

 

“Are you ever not training?” she broke the silence. “Or do you even train in your sleep? Or maybe even in your dreams?”

 

He laughed. “Nah, I know when to take a break.”

 

“Besides when you’re injured?”

 

“Yes, besides then. I don’t train in my sleep and I don’t train while I’m in school.”

 

“So, basically, you train during all your free time?”

 

“Well, if I’m not doing homework or studying. I know how to balance everything. I keep a schedule for myself.

 

“Oh, of course you do.”

 

“What’s so bad about training?”

 

“Nothing’s wrong with it. It’s just the constant state of training almost makes it seem like you’re…overcompensating for something.” She smirked.

 

“I’m not.”

 

“Obviously you’re gonna deny it.”

 

Just then, the tram reached the stop at Iwatodai Station. They both got off, but neither of them went their own ways yet.

 

“So…I’m gonna go for a jog,” he said.

 

“Good for you,” she said. “Have a nice run.” She turned to walk away.

 

“We could, uhm, meet at the Shrine later if you’re looking for company.”

 

She paused, holding back a smile. “I think I’ll pass.”

 

He nodded his head once. “No problem. Later.” And he took off.

 

Kirika watched the stranger until he disappeared. That was when Idun threw a little temper tantrum. She put her hand to her chest. “What is your issue?” she said under her breath. “Calm the hell down. Nothing is wrong. I’m not in any sort of danger.” Idun didn’t seem to want to listen. “Seriously, what is up with you?” She let out a heavy sigh and tried to ignore it. That was when she noticed a few passersby eyeing her oddly. “The hell do you want from me? Don’t you have anything better to do than stare?” The citizens turned their gazes downwards and sped away. “Tch. That’s what I thought.”

 

Once no one was paying any attention to her again, she returned to her train of thought. Why was Idun freaking out all of a sudden? Hell, six years and she still didn’t understand Idun’s reactions half the time. Six years and she still didn’t have her Persona figured out. Hmm…

 

Perhaps there was a way she could finally come to terms with Idun’s full potential.


	26. June 20th, 2009

Kirika woke up with a start. She looked around to find herself on a bench just outside the Shrine. She had spent the last week sleeping sporadically. A couple hours here and a couple more hours there. Any amount of time that would allow her to—somewhat—rest without it being considered suspicious.

 

She ran a hand through her hair as she tried to wake herself up more. She was starting to feel as if she was a part of the Lost, despite still having her conscious. Not that it always felt like that. There were times when she questioned her sanity, but she was aware those with Apathy Syndrome lacked any sort of thought process.

 

Once she felt she could stand and support herself, she did so. She left the Shrine and just started walking. As to where she was going, she had no idea. She didn’t have anywhere to go. Well, technically she did, but she didn’t want to go there. As she walked aimlessly, though, she soon found herself exactly where she didn’t want to be.

 

The brick house.

 

“The hell did you bring me here for, Idun?” she said. And she could’ve sworn she could feel Idun snickering within her. “Fine. Have it your way.”

 

So, she climbed through the window into the brick house. Shinjiro already didn’t seem to be around. Then again, he never seemed to have spent much time there during the day anyhow. Not that she cared. She had gone this long without seeing him; she wasn’t eager to see him again at this point.

 

Idun would argue that point.

 

Kirika decided to go back to the second floor. Her previous exploration ended with an interruption, so now she wanted to continue with it. Plus, if she recalled correctly, there was one other door she never had the chance to check out. So she made her way up the staircase and passed the bedrooms. She peaked into the child’s room as she walked by it, swallowing hard at the pain she felt emanating from inside.

 

She reached the door at the end of the hallway and opened it. Slowly. Carefully. Holding her breath. And on the other side was another staircase. A narrower one. She climbed it and found herself in the attic. It was nearly empty. Nearly. Except for a single box sitting off to the side. She furrowed her brow as she walked over to it. She knelt in front of the small object, gently picking it up and blowing the dust off it, causing it to dance around her. And as she examined it, Idun began to panic.

 

“Calm down,” Kirika said with a soft voice, but Idun only panicked more. “Seriously, chill out. I’m getting sick of you being so overdramatic lately.” She then went to lift the box cover, only to find that it was locked. She let out a heavy sigh. “Happy now? Damn thing’s locked, so I can’t open it anyway.”

 

“You sure do have a fascination with this place,” a male voice said from behind.

 

She jumped, almost dropping the box. “Shit, Aragaki… Don’t sneak up on me like that,” she said. “How’d you even know I was here?”

 

“The house is made of brick, but the floors sure as hell ain’t,” Shinjiro said. She looked at him as if she was expecting him to say more. “The floors creak, moron.” He walked up behind her. “What’s that?”

 

“What does it look like? It’s a box. It’s locked, though.” She put it down and got back to her feet. “I need to find the key.” And she began searching the floor.

 

“You need to?”

 

“Yes, I need to.”

 

“Why?”

 

“I need to know what’s inside. If anything.”

 

“No, you don’t need to know. You just want to know.”

 

“Whatever.”

 

“Curiosity killed the cat.”

 

“But satisfaction brought it back.”

 

He chuckled, shaking his head at her. “How do you know the key is even here? Maybe the previous owner took it with them.”

 

“And left the box behind?”

 

“Shit like that happens.”

 

“Not this time.”

 

“How do you know?”

 

“Gut feeling. Now, are you just gonna stand there or you gonna help me look? Oh wait, that’s right, you don’t help anyone but yourself.”

 

He scowled. “That ain’t true.”

 

“Whatever.” She sighed. “Damn it, I don’t even know what kind of key to look for.”

 

“Just let it go. It ain’t that important.”

 

“Not that important?”

 

“Yes, Nishioka, it’s not. Why are you already so obsessed with it? Or have you come up with some theory about this as well?”

 

She glared at him. “Shut up.” She then started back downstairs.

 

He followed her. “Seriously, though, why is it so important to you? I mean, I just don’t get it.”

 

“And I wouldn’t expect you to understand.”

 

“Well, a little explanation might be nice.”

 

She stopped in the doorway for one of the bedrooms. “What’s the point? So you can mock me for it?” She turned and entered the room.

 

“Is this still about that stupid rumour?” He sighed. “Need I remind you that I asked you not to investigate your theory and you went to the alley to investigate it anyway.”

 

“At least I didn’t flat out lie.”

 

“I had a good reason.”

 

“Yeah, to try to sway my interest, which is a load of bullshit. You don’t even have that big of an influence on me.”

 

“That…ain’t how I meant it.”

 

“How else could you have meant it?”

 

“I just—” He sighed, stopping himself, and watched her as she opened each individual drawer in the bureau. “Are you still looking for the key?”

 

“Yes, I’m still looking for it.” She slammed the last drawer shut again. “It has to be here somewhere.”

 

“This is already driving you crazy. C’mon, why does it matter?”

 

“How many times are you gonna ask me that?”

 

“Until I get an answer out of you.”

 

“Ugh. Fine. Because there’s just something about this damn place,” she admitted at long last as she moved across the hall and into the other bedroom. “Something about it seems familiar. It seems…” She shook her head. “I dunno.”

 

“And you think that little box has the answer?”

 

“I think it might have some sort of clue.” She paused as she looked around. This was the child’s room and she couldn’t come to bring herself to touch anything in it. “What do you know about this place?”

 

“Nothing. It’s just a random place I chose.”

 

“There have to be rumours about it, though. There are rumours about everything in this city.”

 

“Yeah…” He cleared his throat. “Apparently a family was killed here a good while back. At least six years. That’s why the whole neighbourhood has been abandoned.”

 

“Six years?” She shook her head. “Of course, it would be six years.”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“I left this city six years ago.”

 

“And?”

 

“Nothing. Never mind it.”

 

“C’mon, Nishioka, I think it’s time for you to get out of here,” he said. “This kind of mindset ain’t very healthy.”

 

She kept shaking her head as she turned to start searching the child’s room. “No, I need to find—”

 

“Kirika.”

 

Now she froze, jaw clenched. She looked back over at Shinjiro. Obviously he felt strongly about this, so she swallowed hard and left the room. She returned to the first floor, and he followed closely behind her.

 

“You need to go be a kid or something,” he said almost teasingly.

 

“Tch. I don’t think I’ve ever been a kid.” He raised an eyebrow at her. “When your parents die young, you grow up fast.”

 

Now he nodded. “I know what you mean.” He thought for a moment. “You said you left six years ago… Why’d you come back?”

 

“Good question. I hate this city. And when I did leave all those years ago, I never thought I’d find myself back here.”

 

“Honestly, I can’t believe you’ve been on your own for so long.”

 

“Don’t make a big deal out of it.”

 

“I ain’t. Just saying you’re tougher than I thought.”

 

She shrugged her shoulders. “Had no choice but to be. Not only because my parents died when I was young, but also because they—” She stopped herself, shaking her head once more.

 

“Because they…what?”

 

She pursed her lips. She didn’t need to go into details about her past. Especially about her parents. It wasn’t worth it. “Nothing. Never mind.”

 

“Hmm.” He eyed her thoughtfully. “So, you don’t even have any friends you’ve made along the way?”

 

“No. I’ve never stayed anywhere long enough to form friendships. Or to learn anyone’s name, for that matter. I don’t get attached to people. It’s easier that way.”

 

“Man, and I thought I had issues.”

 

She couldn’t help but smile. “You’re welcome, for at least reinstating a little bit of your sanity.”

 

“Can’t say I blame you for feeling that way, though.”

 

“I’m gonna stop you right there,” she said. “This is already getting too close for comfort. This got too close for comfort the moment I gave you my name. So, please, stop trying to relate to me.”

 

“You try really hard to keep yourself distanced from people, huh?”

 

“Shut up.”

 

He chuckled under his breath. “Whatever. I ain’t sticking around, though, so you should stay and get some sleep. You look like shit.”

 

She scowled at him, but didn’t respond. Once he was gone, she let out a heavy sigh. Too close for comfort, yet Idun had never felt more comfortable.


	27. June 22nd, 2009

It was eight o’clock at night when Kirika found herself sitting at the café trying to keep herself from going back to the brick house. She had spent the previous day catching up on sleep, but left once the Dark Hour passed. And now not going back turned out to be a lot more difficult than she had originally thought it would be. Something seemed to be calling her back there, though, and she wasn’t sure if it was Idun wanting her to see Shinjiro, or if it was the little box attempting to summon her. Either way, she no longer felt comfortable in her own skin.

 

Once it was ten o’clock and she had ordered three cups of coffee and one cup of tea, she decided it was time to head out. She gave in to her instincts and headed for Port Island Station to return to the brick house. She figured she might as well go back. Maybe there was something legitimately wrong and Shinjiro needed her help. Maybe that’s what the feeling was. So she chose to just check it out. And if she was wrong, then she would turn around and leave.

 

When she arrived, she hesitated. So she took a deep breath and trudged on. She entered the abandoned house and looked around. Shinjiro was nowhere to be found. She went to the bottom of the staircase and stopped.

 

“Hello?” she said, refusing to go up. If she did, she knew she’d go right back to searching for that damn key. And she didn’t want to get distracted by that. Not now, anyway…

 

She waited a while longer to see if he would eventually come back. Soon enough, though, it was 11:15 and there was still no sign of him.

 

“Hmm. I don’t like this,” she said. “Something feels off.”

 

So, she headed for the window to go back out. She’d start at the alley and search the rest of the city from there if she had. As soon as she dropped to the ground and stood up straight, though, she jumped a little.

 

“Shit, stop doing that,” she said.

 

“You say that like I was supposed to know you were here,” Shinjiro said. “I didn’t know you were here, by the way. And I’m almost surprised to see you here.”

 

She shrugged her shoulders. “I had a bad feeling…”

 

“And…?”

 

“And I wanted to make sure everything was okay.”

 

“Tch. I don’t need you checking up on me.”

 

“Fine, whatever.” And she walked away.

 

“Hold on, where do you think you’re going?” he said, following after her.

 

“I don’t know. Anywhere.”

 

“It’s almost 11:30. You should—”

 

“I have half an hour to find a safe place to stay. I think I’ll be fine.”

 

“That amount of time passes way more quickly than you may realise.”

 

“It’ll be plenty of time,” she said. “You should get back to your hideout, though, because if you follow me then you definitely won’t have enough time to get back.”

 

“Why don’t you just come back with me?”

 

“Because we’re not friends, remember?”

 

“Oh, so that’s what this is all about,” he realised. “That’s what’s bothering you?”

 

“Nothing’s bothering me.”

 

“Bullshit.”

 

“In case you’ve already forgotten, I don’t do relationships.”

 

“Tch. You’re a real piece of work, y’know.”

 

“Whatever.”

 

“Damn it, Nishioka, stop being so stubborn and just come back with me.”

 

“No.”

 

“What do I have to do to change your mind?”

 

“Nothing. You don’t have to change my mind. Just like you don’t have to change your attitude. You don’t have to be nice to me. You don’t have to help me. You don’t have to take care of me. And you definitely don’t have to pretend to be my friend. I’ve gone my entire life on my own. I sure as hell don’t need anyone now.”

 

“I think you may take things a bit too personally.”

 

She stopped dead in her tracks and faced him. “Excuse me?”

 

“Don’t hold grudges.”

 

She shook her head. “Can’t hold grudges when I don’t get attached to people. That’s even part of my reasoning. No attachments means no emotions which means I can’t get hurt or betrayed or—” She stopped herself, taking a deep breath. “It’s just never worth it. And what are you still doing here? Why haven’t you gone back yet? You don’t need to be here. I don’t get why you feel so obligated to watch after me.”

 

“Yeah, I don’t get it, either.” He sighed. “But I do.”

 

Her brow furrowed as she looked him up and down. She hadn’t been expecting him to actually admit that. Either way, she kept going until she reached Iwatodai Station. He continued to follow her, too, even as she boarded the tram.

 

“You know this means there’s no making it back now?” he said.

 

“Your loss.”

 

They sat in silence until they got off the tram. Kirika didn’t go far from there. She just took a seat on a nearby bench, and Shinjiro sat beside her.

 

“You really don’t let yourself get attached to people?” he spoke up.

 

“Yeah. Remember how the other day I mentioned how I never stay anyplace long enough to form a friendship or whatever?” Kirika shrugged her shoulders. “Well, I never stay in a single place for longer than two months. I’ve never given myself time to settle and I’ve always done that on purpose.”

 

“And you’re like this all because your parents died when you were little?”

 

“Tch. If you think the reason’s that simple then you haven’t experienced the bullshit life can throw at you.”

 

“Trust me, I’ve experienced it. You ain’t the only one who’s had it bad.”

 

“Whatever.”

 

He shook his head. “When did you even get here?”

 

“Beginning of April.”

 

“That means your two months will be up soon.”

 

She swallowed hard. “Guess so.” She sat up and checked her watch. “11:55.”

 

“Told you time passes quickly.” He stood up. “C’mon, I know a place around here that will provide enough shelter for us.”

 

She stood up as well. “I’m not going with you.”

 

“Where the hell do you think you’re going, then?”

 

“Nowhere in particular.” And she started walking off.

 

He sighed, stepping in front of her before she could get far. “What am I supposed to do with you?”

 

“Leave me alone. You didn’t want anything to do with me in the first place. So why are you the one who’s trying so hard now to keep me around?”

 

“Tch.” He looked away. “It ain’t anything like that.”

 

“Right, of course not.” She rolled her eyes.

 

Just then, the world went dark and the atmosphere shifted.

 

“It’s begun,” he said.

 

“You should get to your little shelter.”

 

“Not unless you plan on coming with me.” She shook her head at him, rolling her eyes. “Fine. I’ve seen firsthand what you’re capable of, though, so I’m not too worried.”

 

“Don’t rely on me for protection. She doesn’t always come through. Not until it’s too late, at least.”

 

“Hmm.”

 

“W-what are you saying?” they suddenly heard a male voice say. “Who the hell are you?” It sounded relatively close.

 

“That’s coming from—” Kirika said.

 

“—the back alley,” Shinjiro said.

 

“Well, Idun does have a way of subconsciously leading me to where I’m supposed to be.” She paused. “Let’s get closer.”

 

They moved into the alley from the opposite entrance, making sure to remain out of sight in the shadows. There were four people standing around, three guys and one girl. There were also a few coffins.

 

“Somebody’s got a grudge against you, and they asked us to get revenge,” a guy with glasses said.

 

“Revenge?” the teen who they originally heard said. “What kinda bullshit is this? Who put you up to this?”

 

“Can’t tell you. We’re professionals.”

 

“Professionals?” He paused before widening his eyes. “Oh shit. You mean the rumours on the net are true?”

 

The guy with glasses took a step back as a shirtless young man stepped forward, pulling out a revolver.

 

“Hey, w-wait,” the teen said. “I haven’t don’t anything! Why me? What’d I do?”

 

“That is not our concern,” the shirtless young man said. “Your notion of right and wrong is irrelevant. My client’s wishes are all that matter. People hear what they choose to hear, and believe what they want to believe.” He raised the gun.

 

The teen moved back. “No-no… Stay away… Get away from me!” He then turned to run away.

 

The shirtless young man smirked. “You squeal most magnificently. Such raw emotion.” With that, he fired his gun.

 

Kirika gasped, covering her mouth as her eyes widened. At the same time, Shinjiro put a hand on her shoulder, grip tight as if to stop her from intruding on the scene.

 

“He’s not dead,” the girl said after she had walked over to the body.

 

“Doesn’t matter,” the guy with the glasses said. “We’ve held up our end of the bargain. Besides, tomorrow this will just seem like some random crime.”

 

“If there’s nothing else,” the shirtless young man said, “I’m feeling rather tired.”

 

With that, the three of them left the scene. Shinjiro pulled Kirika further into the alley’s shadows as they walked by. Once they were gone, they moved out of the shadows and into the open alley. She stepped over the unconscious body on the ground, crouching beside it to place two fingers to the guy’s neck.

 

“We have to report this to the police,” she said.

 

“And tell them what?” Shinjiro said. “The guy’s a goner; I can tell just by the look on your face. And by the time the Dark Hour’s over, there’ll be no helping him.”

 

She stood back up straight. “Who even were those people? And what rumours were they talking about?”

 

“Some revenge site.”

 

“Revenge site?”

 

“It’s exactly as it sounds. If you want to get revenge on someone, for whatever reason, you can go to this site and hire people to off them for you. They must’ve been the people who run the site, which means it must be real.”

 

“Well, we can’t let them get away with this.”

 

“The hell are we supposed to do about it?”

 

She thought for a moment. “Ugh, I dunno… I’m too tired to think straight and still kinda stunned by what we just witnessed.”

 

“Let’s just focus on getting back to the house, then. Besides, like I said, there ain’t shit we can do anyway. Especially not during the Dark Hour.”

 

“We could’ve stepped in and stopped them.”

 

“No, we could’ve stepped in and gotten ourselves shot as well. You told me earlier Idun doesn’t always show up in time and I have a feeling, no offence, she wouldn’t be quick enough to beat a bullet.”

 

She sighed, but made no retort. They then left the alley and waited out the rest of the—uneventful—Dark Hour on a bench in Port Island Station.


	28. June 23rd, 2009

Kirika couldn’t bring herself to sleep that night. It was almost like Idun wouldn’t even give her the chance to. Every time she closed her eyes, all she saw was the image of that teenager getting shot. And the longer she kept her eyes closed, the more times he got shot.

 

Come eight o’clock, she got up to get ready to go. She looked towards Shinjiro, still fast asleep, and decided against waking him. It wouldn’t be the first time she had snuck out, after all. She had plans to come back that evening, anyway.

 

So she left and made her way for Paulownia Mall. When she got there, she stopped at the café to grab a cup of coffee. After a second cup, she paid and left. Then she took a deep breath before making her way into the police box.

 

“Good morning,” she said.

 

Officer Kurosawa looked at her with a raised eyebrow. “Nishioka. Hello.” He paused. “Is something the matter?”

 

“Not really. I just…wanted to ask you something.”

 

“Yes?”

 

“Have you ever received any reports about crime scenes that just didn’t add up?”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“Like…I’ve heard of a few incidents at that alley. So, have any of the kids ever reported their friend getting shot out of nowhere even though they had been totally fine just a moment before?”

 

“I’m not sure I’m following.”

 

She sighed, searching her brain for a better way to explain it. All she could find, though, was the leftover ringing in her ears from the sound of gunfire. It was keeping her on edge. So she squeezed her eyes shut and tried to shake it out of her head.

 

“Are you feeling all right?” Officer Kurosawa spoke up.

 

Her eyes shot back open. She had almost forgotten where she was. “I’m fine. I just get a sharp pain in my head from time to time. I think it’s because of the concussion.”

 

He nodded. “As for your question, I’m afraid I can’t answer it. Even if I understood what you were getting at, crime reports are confidential.”

 

“Right. That makes sense.”

 

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

 

She forced a smile across her face. “Yes. I-I’m positive.”

 

With that, she took her leave. _So much for that._ She let out a heavy sigh and made her way to Port Island Station so she could return to the brick house. By the time she got back, she found that Shinjiro was gone. So she crawled onto the futon and allowed herself to doze off and on for a while. Finally, one of the times she woke up, she awoke to the sound of Shinjiro climbing in through the window.

 

“Hey, I wanted to talk more about last night,” she said right away, sitting up straight. “I just can’t stop thinking about what happened and—” She stopped after having actually taken a good look at him. “Damn, Aragaki, you seem angrier than usual.”

 

“Tch.” He collapsed into the armchair.

 

“Did something happen?”

 

“Just…some jackass I know.”

 

“Harassing you?”

 

“In a way, I guess.”

 

She smiled. “Want me to kick his ass for you?”

 

He glared at her in response. “What about last night?” he then said, seeming more than eager to change the subject.

 

“Oh. I can’t stop thinking about it,” she said again, going along with the change without any hesitation. “I couldn’t sleep last night because I kept seeing the kid get shot every time I closed my eyes. And I’ve had this ringing in my ears all day.”

 

“What do you want me to do about it?”

 

“I just…” She sighed. “There’s something I’ve been wondering about…”

 

“Get to the point, then.” Clearly his patience had already run out.

 

“Seriously. Who is this jackass and how is he able to piss you off more than I am?”

 

“Get to the point or get lost.”

 

“I’ll do both since you clearly need to chill out,” she said. “So, there were a few coffins around last night, which means the kid hadn’t been alone before the Dark Hour began. So…what happened once the Dark Hour ended, and his friends became aware again and saw him bleeding on the ground? They would’ve been so confused and at a loss for what had happened.” Hell, that made so much more sense than the explanation she had tried giving to Officer Kurosawa. Then again, she supposed it helped that Shinjiro was aware of what had happened.

 

“And?”

 

She paused. “Never mind. Just forget it.”

 

He closed his eyes. “Whatever.”

 

“Yeah, whatever.”

 

With that, Kirika took off. Not knowing where else to go, she ended up making her way for the Shrine. She hadn’t stopped by there in a while, after all. And when she got there, she wasn’t alone.

 

“Does anyone else live in this damn city?” she announced her presence, sitting down on her typical bench.

 

The white-haired stranger looked over his shoulder at her and chuckled. “Yeah, it’s easy to realise Iwatodai’s not that big of a city.” He stopped throwing punches. “Hey, what’s up? You look pretty worn down and worked up all at the same time?”

 

She shook her head. “Just some prick.”

 

“Are you getting into fights again?”

 

“Hah. Not this time, no.”

 

“Well, is this guy giving you a hard time?”

 

“He’s just—He’s all over the place. One day he’s somewhat nice to me and helping me out, and the next day he’s cold and rude and doesn’t give a shit about anything or anyone. His attitude is constantly changing and—” She stopped herself.

 

Damn it, she couldn’t believe it. She couldn’t believe she was complaining to one stranger about some other stranger. Hell, what had happened to her? She had been in the city for barely two months, and it was like she was destroying all her rules. Her reservations. She felt as if she was losing sight of herself. She couldn’t let that happen, though. She had to stick to her guns. And that meant backing off. It meant keeping to herself. It meant not getting involved with other people. Strangers.

 

“And…?” the stranger spoke up. She had almost forgotten she wasn’t alone. “What? Did you realise that that sounds a bit too familiar.”

 

“Shut up. You barely know me.”

 

“Just trying to lighten the mood.”

 

She sighed. “I ain’t in the mood to be cheered up.”

 

“That doesn’t make any sense.”

 

“It makes perfect sense.”

 

“Well, it doesn’t sound healthy.”

 

She shrugged her shoulders. “Oh well.”

 

“Hmm.” He paused. “Is this a guy you’re…seeing? Or dating or whatever?”

 

“What? Hell no. I would never.”

 

“Good.”

 

“Good?”

 

“Don’t take that wrong way. All I’m saying is that you two seem to have very similar personalities. Can’t see that doing either of you any good in a relationship.”

 

“They do say opposites attract, so…” She paused. “But don’t worry, I ain’t looking to you for dating advice.”

 

He shook his head. “Trust me, I would never try to give you dating advice. That’s really not my strong suit, to be honest.”

 

“Right.” She stood up. “Well, I’ll let you get back to your training. Wouldn’t want to be a hindrance or anything.”

 

“No, I don’t mind.”

 

“I should get going anyway.” And she began to leave.

 

“At least tell me your name.”

 

“What? That was random.”

 

“C’mon, we’ve met at least five times now and we’ve yet to properly introduce ourselves to each other,” he said.

 

She shrugged. “Don’t you find that a bit exciting?” He shook his head at her, though he was chuckling again. She smiled. “So long, stranger.”


	29. June 26th, 2009

Another few days passed, and they were another few days Kirika spent staying away from the brick house and from Shinjiro. But she couldn’t stop thinking about what the other stranger from the Shrine had said. _Sounds familiar_. Despite how much she didn’t want to admit it, he still had a point. The way she acted was almost exact to how Shinjiro acted.

 

Maybe that was why they had such a hard time getting along.

 

Come late afternoon, she found herself back at the Shrine. And for a while she just sat there. Breathing. Trying not to think. She had been doing a lot of overthinking lately and it was starting to stress her out. She wanted, for one day, to be able to not actually think about anything in particular. Nothing important or crucial or—

 

She heard barking. She looked down to see the dog she had played with before sitting in front of her. She smiled.

 

“Hi, boy,” she said. “How are you?” He barked some more. “Oh, I am so happy to hear that. You walking yourself again?” He walked around himself and sat back down. She laughed and petted him. “You’re so clever.” He wagged his tail.

 

After she greeted him, she watched him run around for a little bit before checking her watch.

 

“I can’t believe it’s 6:30 already,” she said. He ran over to her and sat down again, his tail still wagging. “Hey, buddy, I may have to get going soon.” He tilted his head and whined. “I know, I don’t wanna go, either.”

 

“Oh, I see we have a mutual friend,” a male voice then said.

 

She looked up to see the stranger. “You know this little fella?”

 

“Koromaru,” he said, kneeling down and petting him. “He’s a good, loyal dog.”

 

“Wait, is he yours?”

 

“Oh, no.” He shook his head and stood up as Koromaru began running around again. “His owner died about six months ago. Got hit by a car while he was crossing the street right outside the Shrine here.”

 

“That’s why he’s always hanging around here,” she said.

 

“Exactly. For the time the Priest owned him, they went on a walk every single day, and Koro-chan still walks himself along that same route every single day.”

 

“That’s so sad.”

 

“Yeah.” Koromaru was barking again. “What is it, Koro-chan?” he said, kneeling back down.

 

The Shiba nuzzled his hand before walking over to Kirika and nuzzling her leg. Then he took off.

 

“Guess he just wanted to say goodbye,” she said, staring at the spot the dog had last been seen.

 

The stranger stood back up. “Does that mean you’ll be leaving now?”

 

She stood up as well. “I probably should.”

 

“Let me walk you to wherever you’re going.”

 

“I appreciate that, but I really don’t need an escort.” And she started to walk away.

 

“Do I bother you?”

 

“Hmm?” She stopped. “Excuse me?”

 

“Do I bother or annoy you or—?”

 

“N-no, it’s nothing like that.”

 

“Then where are you going?”

 

She sighed before a sheepish smile spread across her face. “Iwatodai Station.”

 

So, they left the Shrine together and made their way for the station. The walk was quiet at first. Neither of them spoke or even looked at each other, for that matter. Kirika was looking at the other residents of the city, though, and taking note of—

 

“The amount of the Lost seems to be increasing again,” she said aloud before she could stop herself.

 

“Come again?”

 

“Oh. Sorry. It was nothing.”

 

“No, what did you say about the Lost?”

 

“Just that they seem to be increasing in number again.” She shrugged her shoulders. “It’s a little pattern I’ve noticed in the couple of months I’ve been here. Every couple of weeks they increase and decrease. Haven’t figured out exactly why yet.”

 

“Why would you focus on something like that?”

 

“I know it sounds trivial, but it just strikes me as intriguing.”

 

“I see.” He nodded. “So, you’ve been in the city for only a couple months?”

 

“Yeah. I lived here when I was kid, though. Then I left—I moved when I was eleven. Now here I am again, six years later.” She swallowed hard. “Something told me it was time to come back.”

 

“Did you come back alone?”

 

“Who would I have come with?”

 

He looked at her like she was crazy. “I don’t know. Your parents, maybe?”

 

“Shit, that’s right.” She shook her head. “Hah, sometimes I forget that other kids still have parents.”

 

“Actually, my parents passed away when I was younger,” he said.

 

Her eyes widened. “I am so sorry.”

 

“Don’t be. Not like you knew.”

 

“Still…”

 

“You make it sound like your parents are gone, too.”

 

“They are.”

 

They fell silent and remained silent for the rest of the walk. Next thing they knew, they were at Iwatodai Station and the tram was pulling up.

 

“Am I allowed to know your name now?” he spoke up.

 

“Nope.”

 

“When will you tell me?”

 

She smiled. “Who says I’ll ever tell you?”

 

“C’mon, you gotta tell me at some point.”

 

She thought for a moment. “Maybe once you know my deepest, darkest secret.”

 

He laughed. “Seems fair.”

 

“So long, stranger.”

 

With that, she boarded the tram alone. And she took a seat on the opposite side so that she wouldn’t watch the stranger out the window as the tram rode off.

 

Hell, what had gotten into her? What was it about this guy that she was so…attracted to? Attracted. Was that the right word? No. She was drawn to him. There was some sort of odd force pulling her to him rather than pushing her away from him. Idun had taken notice of it, as well. And Idun already seemed pretty damn fond of it. Kirika, on the other hand, couldn’t get used to it. Nor did she want to grow used to it.


	30. June 29th,  2009

After having talked with the other stranger, Kirika kept noticing more and more of the Lost over the course of the next few days. She almost wished she had never bothered to point it out. After all, sometimes ignorance really could be bliss. Not this time, though. Besides, she had a new theory now.

 

“Wow, you actually came back,” Shinjiro said once she climbed through the brick house’s open window. “Oh wait, that’s no surprise at all.”

 

She rolled her eyes at him. “Y’know, I was hoping you’d have a better attitude by now, but I’ll deal.” She sat down. “The Lost are increasing.”

 

“So?”

 

“You’ve been around this city longer and more recently than I have been. Haven’t you noticed the pattern?”

 

“What pattern?”

 

“Every few weeks, the number of the Lost increase, and then they decrease, so on and so forth.”

 

“What makes that a pattern? It’s just coincidence or a—”

 

“The full moon is coming up and the Lost have been increasing. After the last full moon, they started decreasing.”

 

He paused. “They’re not frigging werewolves.”

 

She had to hold back a chuckle at that comment. “Shut up. That’s the pattern. I mentioned to someone just a few days ago how the number was increasing and how it seemed to be a pattern, but I hadn’t figured it out yet. Then I spent the last few days really thinking about it and that’s what I came up with. It would make sense, too.”

 

“You think Apathy Syndrome correlates with the cycle of the moon?”

 

“I do.”

 

He nodded. “And who the hell is this other person you were talking to about this?”

 

“No idea. I don’t know his name. Either way, that doesn’t matter. What matters is the fact that—”

 

“No. No more theories. They’re always crazy and they always almost get you killed.”

 

“One damn time.”

 

“That’s one time too many. And you should probably figure out this guy’s name. I mean, how do you know you can trust him?”

 

“How do I know I can trust you? Okay. Idun gets a good vibe from him and she’s never been wrong before.”

 

“Never?”

 

“Never.”

 

“What vibe does she get from me, then?”

 

She looked him up and down. “Irritated.”

 

“Real funny.”

 

“What’s funny is that you think I’m joking.”

 

“Tch.” He cocked his head to the side. “Did you come here for any other reason or was that stupid theory all you had to share?”

 

“You didn’t even let me finish.”

 

“I know.”

 

“What’s your issue with me?”

 

“The hell you talking about?”

 

“Please, you know exactly what I’m talking about. From the moment you met me you’ve wanted nothing to do with me, yet every so often you’ll decide you want to help me.” She shrugged her shoulders. “Why? What’s the point?”

 

“Much like you, I’m not big on relationships. They’re a waste of time. Better yet, you had the nerve to say all that, yet you still check up on me. And you’re spending time with that other poor bastard. So don’t be a hypocrite.”

 

“That’s why you don’t like me,” she said.

 

“What?”

 

Well, might as well test out her other theory now.

 

“I remind you of yourself,” she went on. “That’s why you don’t like me. We’re too alike, and you see the parts of yourself that you can’t stand the most in me. So because of that, we have a hard time getting along.”

 

He seemed to actually be considering this notion. “What’s your point?” he asked after a few moments of silence.

 

“Can’t say I really have a point. But you have to admit, it makes sense.”

 

“Yeah? That another one of your little theories?”

 

“Yeah. And look, I wasn’t almost killed.”

 

“Tch. You’re a moron.”

 

She couldn’t help but smile at this. “Yes, I believe you’ve said that before.”

 

“What?”

 

“What?”

 

“The hell you smiling for?”

 

“Moron,” she said. He raised an eyebrow at her. “C’mon, it might as well be a term of endearment for you.”

 

“It ain’t a term of endearment.”

 

“Sure it is.”

 

“Fine. You keep telling yourself that.”

 

“I will.”

 

“You will…be leaving soon is what you meant to say, right?”

 

“You wish.”

 

“Whatever. I’ll just do or say something in a few days that’ll piss you off, and then you’ll disappear again for a while.”

 

“That does seem to be the _pattern_.”

 

He rolled his eyes at her. “Pain.”

 

“One and the same, Aragaki,” she said, still smiling. “One and the same.”


	31. July 3rd, 2009

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The tarot deck I have referenced in this chapter is the "Tarot of the Witches" deck by Fergus Hall, published in 1991

Having taken a few days to rest up, Kirika returned to the public to earn more money with her readings. She set up by the Iwatodai Strip Mall again, seeing as she seemed to always have the most success in that area. Even if the success of that business included returning customers. Not that there was anything wrong with that. She was getting used to seeing familiar faces.

 

It was a little after four o’clock when she decided to wrap things up. Right as she finished putting everything away, an older man stepped up to her station. She looked him up and down. He was wearing glasses and a black turtleneck with a brown sort of suit. He smiled down at her, but she couldn’t bring herself to smile back. Especially given the way Idun was reacting within her.

 

“Can I help you?” Kirika spoke up.

 

“I was hoping you would make time for one more reading,” he said. “I’ll even pay full price for just one.”

 

That wasn’t a bad offer. Idun didn’t want to agree to it, though. “Palm reading or tarot reading?” she said, despite Idun’s temper tantrum.

 

“Tarot, please.”

 

She nodded her head once. “Sit down.”

 

“Thank you very much, miss.” He sat down and she pulled her deck back out. “So, how exactly does this work?”

 

“First off, clear your mind,” she said. The man closed his eyes at this. “Now, take the deck and shuffle it.” He did as he was told. “As you shuffle it, think of the question you would like to have answered.”

 

“Does it have to be specific?”

 

“Not necessarily.”

 

“Hmm. I’ve had a sort of very specific goal set for myself for the last ten years,” he said. “So I suppose I would like to know…” He reopened his eyes. “Will I be successful in my endeavours?” He placed the deck back down between them.

 

“Very well.” She picked the deck back up and started placing them. “This is the ten-card spread. Just keep your mentality serious and keep that question in the back of your mind throughout the reading.” He simply nodded in response. “The first card is your present position; it represents who you are.” She flipped the first card over. “Four of Cups. That stands for weariness, disappointment, aversion, disgust, disdain, and bitterness. Perhaps this goal of yours is giving you a bit of a hard time and you’re not very content with your attempts to reach it. The next card is your immediate influence. It shows the nature of involvement or the obstacles which lie just ahead.” She flipped the second card. “Six of Batons. That represents conquest, triumph, progress, good news, advancement, and expected victory. So whatever or whoever you’re surrounding yourself with is helping you a great deal.” She noticed a little smirk flicker across his lips at this. She shifted a bit. “The next card is your goal or destiny. This will tell you how much can be accomplished based on current conditions.” She flipped the third card. “The Chariot. Uhm…that stands for—for war, vengeance, difficulty, trouble, turmoil, triumph, failure, outside factors, conflicting influence, perplexity, defeat, escape, chaos, and fleeing from reality.”

 

“Is that good for me or bad for me?”

 

Her eyes widened a bit. “Well, typically war and vengeance and chaos are bad. Typically, those aren’t things people want to accomplish.”

 

“Hmm. Go on.”

 

“Right. The next card is the distant past. It broadly shows events of the past and how they could impact you now.” She flipped the fourth card. “The Hanged Man. This represents sacrifice, surrender, abandonment, lack of progress, renunciation, transition, suspension, indecision, readjustment, approach of new life forces, and regeneration. So it seems you may have failed your goal in the past, as well, despite all you gave up for it. And now your obsession with it—”

 

“It’s not an obsession,” he said.

 

“My apologies.” She cleared her throat. “Uhm. The next card is recent past events. So this is the current influence of what’s going on in your life.” She flipped the fifth card. “Seven of Batons. Success, advantage, surmountable obstacles, overcoming challenges, and gain. So, once again, whoever you seem to be surrounding yourself with has done a lot in terms of helping you for the better. You’re more successful with these people now than whoever you had helping you in the past.” She smiled unsurely before swallowing hard. “The next card is your future influence. In a broad sense, it’s what to come from your inspirations.” She flipped the sixth card. “Ace of Swords.”

 

“What does it mean since it’s facing you?”

 

“That just means it’ll read backwards or represent the opposite of its initial connotation,” she said. “Normally, it stands for great determination, triumph, power, success, strength, and conquest. Since it’s reversed, though, instead it stands for a lack of determination, disaster, inability, failure, weakness, and surrender. So it seems the outcome of this goal of yours could turn out a lot like it did in the past.” The man raised an eyebrow at her. Idun told her to back down. To lie through her teeth for the rest of reading, but Kirika couldn’t do that. If this man was as bad as Idun sensed, then she would dare to bring out that side of him. “The next card is the Questioner. So it shows you in your present position and your attitude on current events. This card will put you in proper perspective.” She flipped the seventh card and her breath caught in her throat. “The Devil. Violence, ruin, slavery, inferiority, subservience, downfall, weird experience, an ill-tempered person, lack of principles, and black magic.” She paused, nodding. “Talk about a bad attitude. Then again, your present position card does match this one pretty well.”

 

“Just keep going,” he said.

 

She pursed her lips. She should’ve listened to Idun. “The next card is your environmental factors. So this is your effect on the people around you and how they may affect you in return.” She flipped the eighth card over. “Nine of Cups. Success, abundance, well-being, good health, and victory.” She paused. “Huh. You must be a damn good actor if that’s the sort of vibe you give off. Though, it’s certainly not the vibe I’m getting from you at this moment.”

 

He leaned in closer to her. “I don’t think it’s your job to judge. That’s certainly not what I’m paying you to do.”

 

Idun might as well have been screaming within her. But Kirika only took a deep breath before continuing. “Yes, you are correct.” She focused back on the deck. “The next card is your inner emotions. It tells of your hidden hopes and secret desires, fears, and anxieties. It also includes those thoughts that will follow you into the future.” She flipped the ninth card. “Six of Swords. Voyage, attempt through difficulties, and success after anxieties. Well, at least you still believe in yourself. That alone can sometimes be good enough.” She waited for the man to retort, but he said nothing. “The next card is the final result,” she went on. “It shows the culmination of every single one of your influences as revealed by the other cards in the spread.” She flipped the tenth and final card. “The Tower.” She paused as Idun caused her thoughts to go to Tartarus. Hmm… “Change, disruption, adversity, calamity, misery, deception, unexpected event, ruin, termination, events left behind, breaking down of old beliefs, and a breakthrough.” She paused again. “Looks, to me, like you’re never gonna be successful with this goal of yours. Unless—” Maybe this was exactly why Idun got such a bad feeling from this man. “—Unless that’s what you want to come from your goal.”

 

The man remained silent. Instead, he rose to his feet and took back his money.

 

She instinctively reached for his hand. “Excuse me, what the hell do you think you’re doing?”

 

“You rigged that deck,” he said.

 

She rolled her eyes at the man. “Why is it that every time someone is unhappy with their outcome, they assume I somehow rigged it?” She then shook her head, unable to hold back her exasperated chuckle. “Listen, the only time I touched it was when I laid it out. You’re the one who shuffled it. You’re the one who put your mentality into it. That deck came straight from _your_ subconscious. Ain’t my fault it was so negative.”

 

He actually smiled at her now. “Silly girl.” And he walked away.

 

Kirika watched the man until he disappeared. She lightly rubbed at her chest, trying to get Idun to calm down.

 

“What was that about?” Shinjiro suddenly asked.

 

She jolted at his presence. “I dunno. Just some psychotic man,” she said. “He was none too happy with his reading. Not that I can really blame him. The entire time, though, Idun was just giving off a bad sense. And it was seriously the most negative reading I’ve ever done.”

 

“Tch. You’re kidding, right?”

 

“What? Why do you seem so surprised by that?”

 

He only shook his head at her in response. “C’mon, let’s get food. I doubt you’ve eaten all day.” And he made his way for the ramen shop.

 

She looked back in the direction the man had disappeared. “The son of a bitch didn’t even pay me.”

 

“Then I will pay for your food. Just get over it.”

 

Now she sighed. She followed Shinjiro into the ramen shop, but she couldn’t get her mind off that man. Or his reading, better yet.

 

_Silly girl._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another month down, only like, nine more to go lmao  
> Thanks to those who keep coming back for more :3


	32. July 4th, 2009

Another restless night for Kirika. She had slept through the Dark Hour and woke up just as it was ending. After that, she was unable to fall back asleep. Shinjiro didn’t seem to be having any sort of problems, though.

 

Come seven o’clock, she decided to head out. She needed to get some fresh air. And after a bit of walking around, she made her way for the mall. She went to the café and picked up a coffee and a tea. Then she headed back to the brick house. It was just about nine o’clock once she returned, and Shinjiro had woken up by then.

 

“Coffee or tea?” she said as she sat across from him.

 

“Hmm.” He took the cup with the tea. “Thanks.”

 

“Don’t mention it.” She took a sip of the coffee. “I, uh, didn’t sleep very well, so I’m just gonna hang around here today. I’m too exhausted to exert my energy into doing anything useful. Plus, I’m still kinda thrown off by that last reading I did yesterday.”

 

He grunted, still half asleep. “Whatever.”

 

She nodded. “Okay.”

 

“You have trouble sleeping a lot,” he then said.

 

“I’m aware.”

 

“Something on your mind?”

 

She took another sip. “Excuse me?”

 

“Is something bothering you?”

 

“What do you care?”

 

He sighed. “Quit being such a pain, Nishioka.”

 

“Only trying not to burden you.”

 

“Tch.” He sipped his tea. “You’re being more of a burden this way.”

 

“How so?”

 

“Tell me what’s on your mind and I’ll be able to figure out whether or not you’re gonna go do something stupid.” Another sip. “Bottle shit up, though, and I won’t be able to help you when you need it.”

 

“What makes you think I even need your help?”

 

“Because I know you. You’re reckless, and this type of behaviour tends to contribute to that recklessness.”

 

She paused for a moment, just blinking. Then she couldn’t help but laugh. “I’m sorry, but did you actually just say that you know me? Or did I fall back asleep for a moment and dream that?”

 

“Nope. I said it.”

 

She blinked a couple more times, letting the words sink in. “How do you figure?”

 

He took another sip of his tea and when he pulled the cup away, his lips were curled into a discrete smirk. “We’re one and the same, right?” Now she pursed his lips. Damn him for using her own words against her. He chuckled. “Exactly.”

 

“That doesn’t mean you know me.”

 

“Fine. Prove me wrong, then.”

 

“Is that supposed to be some reverse psychology bullshit so you can try to stop me from doing the stupid thing you assume I’m going to do?”

 

And another sip. “Hmph.”

 

She nodded. “Yeah. If you know me then that means I know you, too.”

 

“Tch.”

 

“Wow, two non-word answers in a row.” She grinned. “I must be on a roll.”

 

“Shut up.”

 

“Why do you think I’m gonna do something stupid, anyway?”

 

He shook his head. “It ain’t that I assume you will. I just don’t want you to because I don’t wanna have to save your ass yet again.”

 

“What makes you think you’ll have to save my ass?”

 

“I have before.”

 

“I’ve saved your ass before, too.” She paused. “Oh, I get it now.” She took another sip of her coffee. “You’re trying to piss me off again.”

 

“Actually, no, I ain’t.”

 

“Then what the hell are you doing?”

 

“Looking out for you, moron.”

 

“But I thought—”

 

“Listen. The moment I saved your ass and the moment you saved mine in return was the moment we both formed an attachment for one another. So whether we do relationships or not—”

 

“Shut up.”

 

“What?”

 

“I have not grown attached to you.” Idun would beg to differ.

 

“Then why do you keep coming around? Why bother, right? And why do you check up on me just when you have a feeling something may be off? Why put that time and energy into my wellbeing?”

 

She took another sip and swallowed hard. The coffee was still hot enough to burn her throat just enough to make it sting. “I could ask you all the same questions.”

 

“And we’d both come to the same conclusion.”

 

“No. I would never break my own rule for—”

 

“—someone like me?” he said. “I feel the same why. Yet, here we both are. I’ll never get it either. I mean, I can’t even stand myself. So why in the hell would I want to get involved with someone who reminds me of me?”

 

“Ugh, please don’t put it like that. Makes it sound like we’re a damn couple.” She paused. “Either way, I guess you have a point.”

 

“I know I have a point.”

 

“Right, because I’m the moron, not you.”

 

He smiled a little. “Exactly.”

 

She couldn’t hold back the laugh, though it was small. “Shut up, jackass.”


	33. July 7th, 2009

The next few days passed with ease. And the next thing Kirika knew, it was the night of the full moon. She had decided a while back that she would stay at the brick house for this full moon, whether she and Shinjiro were on good terms or not. That wasn’t an issue at the moment, though. The only issue now was the fact that she got to the hideout around 11:30, and Shinjiro was nowhere to be found.

 

“Where the hell could he be at this hour?” she said, letting out a heavy sigh. With no way to get in touch with him, all she could do was wait.

 

Rather than just sitting around while she waited, though, she found herself wandering upstairs. She made it to the landing of the second floor, and then headed up to the third floor. She brought herself back to the box and kneeled before it.

 

“What’s up, Idun?” she said. “Why you bringing me back here? You’ve had the last few weeks to think about this thing and you decided to remember it now, of all times?” She picked up the box to reexamine it. “That damn key has to be around here somewhere. Anywhere.”

 

She put it down and returned to the second floor. She headed straight into the child’s bedroom, seeing as that was where she had left off before. She rummaged through the bureau, coughing away the specs of dust roaming around her face.

 

The clothes left behind felt colder than they should have…

 

“If you wanna know that badly what’s inside the damn box, why don’t you just break it open?” a male voice asked.

 

“Because I don’t want to break the box.”

 

“So, what if you never find the key?”

 

“Then I guess I’ll never know what the hell is inside.”

 

Shinjiro sighed. “I thought you had already forgotten about the damn thing. All this time and you’ve yet to bring it up again.”

 

“Trust me, I’m just as confused as you are.” She shook her head. “Where even were you? You do realise it’s a full moon tonight, right?”

 

“Yeah, I know.”

 

She checked her wristwatch. “It’s five of.”

 

“So what? I wasn’t gonna get caught; I was keeping track of the time.”

 

“Tch.” She practically shoved past him and headed back downstairs. “The Lost have been showing up in pairs recently,” she prompted. “Don’t you find that odd?”

 

“I’m sure you find it stranger than I do,” he said as he followed her. “What’s your point, though?”

 

“Why pairs? Why are the Shadows attacking couples this time?”

 

“What makes you think they’re attacking couples?”

 

“It’s the only logical explanation.”

 

“Don’t do anything stupid, Nishioka.”

 

“I won’t. I’m just saying—”

 

“You’re saying you want to investigate, but it’s too dangerous. You have no idea what’ll happen tonight.”

 

“It wouldn’t hurt to—”

 

“No, it ain’t worth the risk.”

 

“How do you know? Maybe it would be worth it.”

 

He rolled his eyes at her. “You’re ridiculous.”

 

“Oh, that’s a new one. Usually I’m just a moron.”

 

“I don’t understand your fascination in investigating everything.”

 

She shrugged. “I dunno. It’s a hobby, I guess.”

 

“Well, it’s a damn strange hobby at that.”

 

Darkness.

 

“I’m going out,” she said once she adjusted to the change.

 

“The hell you are,” he said. “You ain’t going anywhere.”

 

“Oh, please. Try to stop me, Aragaki.”

 

With that, she was out the window.

 

“I hope you know I ain’t coming after you this time,” he called after her.

 

“Whatever.”

 

She didn’t bother looking back; she just kept on walking. She had no idea where to go, but she went.

 

Maybe she was too stubborn for her own good.

 

As the Dark Hour passed, Kirika found herself simply wandering the city, going nowhere in particular. She was rather alarmed by the lack of Shadows, too. She thought that maybe they were too busy seeking out couples who were still conscious. Then again, she had yet to come across anyone who had managed to remain aware. But maybe the Shadows had already gotten to those people, too.

 

Soon enough, she started tracking down the whereabouts the unconscious couples had been founded recently. A place called…Shirakawa Boulevard. She figured maybe if she investigated that area she could retrieve some answers for herself. Maybe that’s where all the Shadows were gathered at this moment.

 

Maybe she was being stupid…

 

“Hmm. This looks like it could be a hotel,” she said when she arrived at the place. “Or…it is a hotel.” She shook her head. “Hah, no wonder the Lost have been showing up in pairs lately.”

 

She began to check out the area until she realised she wasn’t as alone as she had originally thought. She quickly hid as three familiar strangers came into view. The group consisted of those three people who had shot the teenager about a week or so ago. She couldn’t hear what they were saying, if anything, but they entered a building across the street. Once they were out of sight, she removed herself from her hiding spot to follow them. She waited a couple minutes before also entering the building.

 

“Be prepared, Idun,” she said as she passed through the door, not knowing what may or may not be awaiting her on the other side.

 

Except they were gone.

 

She searched around a bit, soon stumbling upon a stairwell. She climbed it, guardedly, until she reached the door at the top. It was open a crack, but she couldn’t see anyone or anything on the other side. So, she continued to just wait, not wanting to chance intruding upon something she shouldn’t.

 

It wasn’t long before she heard what sounded like clapping.

 

“Faster than I expected,” a male voice said. “That was quite a show. They’ve been rather busy these last few months, including their frequent forays into the Tower. Their fighting style is positively fascinating… And it seems they’ve gained new recruits, too.” There was a pause. “Well, Jin? Are they our enemy?”

 

“Why don’t we ask our _buddy_?” another male voice said; the one she assumed was Jin. “We’ll be seeing him soon.”

 

“Yes, that’s an excellent idea. Considering that he shares our fate, it would be prudent to seek his opinion. We don’t have much time left…”

 

“We are not alone,” a female voice then said.

 

On the other side of the door, Kirika’s eyes widened. Then she didn’t take her time with rushing back down the stairs. She had to get out of the building before—

 

A hand grabbed her shoulder as soon as she passed through the doorway, and it pushed her to the ground.

 

“My, my, and who might this be?” the shirtless young man said.

 

“She can’t be another one of them,” the guy with glasses—Jin—said. “Not someone from that little group, at least.”

 

The shirtless young man grinned. “Mind telling us yourself exactly who you are?”

 

“Why the hell would I do that?” Kirika said. “I know who you three are, though. You’re the so-called professionals from that revenge site.”

 

“Oh, come now, that won’t do,” he said. “Jin, if you would so please…” He held out an empty hand.

 

“Of course,” Jin said, and he opened the case he was holding.

 

Kirika knew what was coming next. She jumped back to her feet. “I wouldn’t do that if I were you.”

 

“And why not?” he said as he handed the revolver to the shirtless young man. “Don’t try to tell me we should be afraid of you.”

 

“Yes, that’s exactly what I’m saying.”

 

“Prove it.”

 

At this point, she was trying with all her might to summon Idun. Hell, she had a damn gun pointed at her. Yet Idun seemed almost…relaxed. What the hell was going on? Of all the times to not give a shit about her wellbeing.

 

Jin started laughing. “That’s what I thought.”

 

The shirtless young man readied his weapon. “Any last words?”

 

She swallowed hard. The only thing left for her to do was—

 

She charged at the young man before he had a chance to pull the trigger. The hell? That’s not what she was supposed to do; she was supposed to run. Get away. But Idun must’ve had other plans, because now Kirika had a tight hold on his arm, keeping it and the gun pointed upwards. He had yet to fire, but it didn’t take long for Jin to pull her away and shove her back to the ground.

 

“Reckless decision,” Jin spoke up.

 

“Yes…” The shirtless young man smirked. “But I do love how the reckless squirm.”

 

Kirika remained on the ground. Idun was somehow still utterly calm. So, she watched as the shirtless young man readied his weapon. She watched as he aimed it at her. She watched as he pulled the trigger. She watched…

 

The world around her grew distant. She was blacking out again. Going numb. The green atmosphere was still and silent.

 

At first.

 

Her heart was suddenly pounding in her ears. There was a stinging in the back of her throat. A foreign taste on her tongue. Salt? Maybe she was crying. Or…iron? Was it possible she could be—? Her eyes widened a bit and she tried to run even faster, though she only felt like she was stumbling. Hell, she wasn’t usually this clumsy.

 

Was she running, though? How could she be running? Hadn’t she just been shot? Maybe she had gotten away somehow. After all, she couldn’t remember how she had gotten to where she was. She had no idea what was going on, but she was too afraid to question it. Perhaps it was another defence mechanism.

 

Hell, it was like she could almost feel the Dark Hour coming to a close. As if it was a warning from Idun. Even she was beginning to grow more frightened now.

 

That was when Kirika spotted a small group of people in the not-so-far-off distance. She somehow managed to run even faster at the sight of them. And as she grew closer to the group, she could’ve sworn a few of them looked…familiar. Or maybe that was due to her vision beginning to blur. Shit. She was blacking out once again. Or maybe she was simply passing out. Losing consciousness. But she couldn’t. Not yet. She had to reach that group first.

 

Almost there…

 

A member of the group seemed to have finally noticed her, pointing her out to the others. And when she finally reached them, she ran straight into one member in particular. Just as she did, Idun vanished. Kirika lost her balance, collapsing to the ground, but she felt arms wrapping around her. And the last thing she saw was a head of white hair before everything went black.


	34. July 11th, 2009

When Kirika awoke next, she had no recollection of what exactly had happened. Then her vision focused and she took note of her surroundings. White walls. White bed. White sheets. White—

 

She was in a hospital…

 

That’s right. She had been shot.

 

It was slowly coming back to her. The full moon. The three people. The _professionals_. The gunshot. Idun—

 

“Good afternoon,” a young nurse said as she entered the room. She smiled. “How are you feeling?”

 

“Confused,” Kirika said.

 

She laughed a little. “Understandable.”

 

“Uhm, what day is it?”

 

“The eleventh. You were checked in very early in the morning on the eighth. Actually, it was just a little after midnight, I believe. You’ve been in and out of consciousness for the last few days now.”

 

“Who brought me here?”

 

“A couple Gekkoukan High students. They said they came across you not too long after the incident. You should be thankful.”

 

“What’s the damage?”

 

“My, you’re quite aware for having just woken up, you know,” the Nurse said instead. “And you’ve made a much quicker recovery than we had anticipated.”

 

“Is that bad?”

 

“Of course not. Just a bit surprising, is all. We still can’t release you yet, though.”

 

She nodded. “So, what was the damage.”

 

“You were shot in the lower left abdomen. No traces of the bullet were left behind, and it somehow missed all major organs. There was a decent amount of blood loss, though.”

 

“Oh. Wow.”

 

“Doesn’t it hurt?”

 

“Now that I’m fully awake, yeah, I’m definitely starting to feel it.”

 

She laughed a bit again. “Mind if I ask you a few questions now?”

 

“Go for it.”

 

“The students who brought you in weren’t able to tell us much about you. Only one of them seemed to know you, but not even he actually knew your name.”

 

Her eyes widened ever so slightly. “Ask me whatever you need to know.”

 

“Let’s start with your name.”

 

“Kirika Nishioka.”

 

She paused. “That sounds familiar.”

 

“I was in here not too long ago with a concussion.”

 

“Yes. You’re the young woman who—”

 

“Who beat that guy unconscious. Yeah. That was me.”

 

“Right.” Another pause. “I’ll be back in just a moment.” She left the room and returned a couple minutes later. “We have here that you’re seventeen, and your birthday is on the sixteenth of October.”

 

“Correct.”

 

“The one thing we never got from you last time was the information for a parent or legal guardian.”

 

“Uhm…I thought I had mentioned my scenario last time.”

 

“Oh?”

 

She swallowed hard. “I’m…on my own. Both my parents died when I was young and I don’t have any guardians. I kinda raised myself.”

 

“Oh. I see.” She shuffled the papers in her hand a bit. “I suppose we’ll have to contact the Gekkoukan student.”

 

“Wait. Why would you do that?”

 

“The young man left his number with the hospital’s front desk and asked us to give him a call once you woke up.”

 

“H-he did?”

 

She nodded. “He seemed extremely concerned. Tried following us out back to stay with you and everything.”

 

She held back a smile. “Don’t know why he would.”

 

The Nurse smiled for her. “Well, you seem a bit more appreciative than you would like to admit.”

 

Now she laughed. “It’s nothing like that. I mean, I don’t know his name, either.”

 

“Then I’ll leave it alone.” She paused. “I just need to check the wound now, and then I’ll be on my way.”

 

“Okay.”

 

She lifted the sheets and moved Kirika’s hospital gown as well as the bandages covering the bullet wound. As the nurse examined it, she was too afraid to even look at the result of her stupidity.

 

“It’s healing quite nicely,” the Nurse spoke up. “At a decently rapid pace, too, which is lucky for you. Strange, but still lucky.” Kirika shrugged, trying to act as if she didn’t understand why either. “It doesn’t look infected,” the Nurse went on, “but it will most certainly scar. All in all, though, excellent recovery, Miss Nishioka.”

 

“Yeah, well, I’ve always been a pretty fast healer,” she said. “Y’know, my body is ahead of modern medicine.”

 

She chuckled as she took the used gauze to throw away. “I’m going to leave it uncovered for a couple hours so the wound can breathe a little.” She smiled. “I’ll let you be. You should try to rest more.”

 

“Try being the keyword.” She sighed. “Thank you, ma’am.”

 

With that, the nurse took her leave. Kirika then lifted the covers and shifted her gown to get a look at the wound for herself. It was stitched up, but it still looked as if the bullet had made it inside a good depth. She lightly brushed her fingers over the wound and hissed at the stinging sensation. And she couldn’t help but wonder how there couldn’t have been any traces of the bullet left. It didn’t make any sense. Unless…

 

Perhaps Idun took care of that for her as well.

 

She lay back. As much as she didn’t want to admit it, Shinjiro had been right. Idun had pulled through for her, though. Maybe she hadn’t protected her from the bullet itself, but she had gotten her to a place where she was able to be helped. Maybe that was why she had been so calm. Maybe she had just been planning ahead. And now Kirika knew that Idun could, in fact, heal a bullet wound. Sure, maybe not quite as quickly, but any rate was better than normal. She also now knew Idun would cause her to black out to prevent feeling pain as well.

 

Either way, it seemed there was a chance Kirika had new enemies. Better yet, they had to have found out she was a Persona-user. After all, she could only assume Idun appeared as soon as she had been shot. So, unless they shot her and took off right away, there was no way they could’ve missed Idun’s emergence. Then again, she had no recollection of the incident after she had been pulled off the shirtless guy.

 

She let out a heavy sigh. She was too tired to think thoroughly about this, at the moment. So, instead, she closed her eyes. And her mind wandered until she fell asleep…


	35. July 12th, 2009

“Good afternoon,” the Nurse greeted Kirika the following day. “You must be hungry.” She put a tray with a small serving of food on the bed before her.

 

“Thank you, ma’am,” Kirika said. She carefully sat up. “What day is it?”

 

She laughed. “The twelfth. You’ve only slept for another day.”

 

“Good. Sometimes I fear that I sleep for days at a time.”

 

And she laughed some more. “Yes, I’m sure that can be worrisome.”

 

“Yeah.” She took a few bites of the food before her. “When do you think I’ll be able to get out of here?”

 

“Probably within the next couple of days if your recovery keeps up like this. Oh, and you have a visitor.”

 

“I do?”

 

“Yes. I can send him in whenever you like. I mean, I know you just woke up so—”

 

“You can let him in now,” she said. “I don’t mind.”

 

“Very well, then.”

 

With that, the Nurse left. Kirika continued eating in small portions as she waited. A few minutes later, a teen with white hair entered the room.

 

“Hey, stranger,” she greeted him.

 

“Hey, you don’t look half bad for someone who was shot not even a week ago,” he said back.

 

“What can I say? I’m a fast healer.”

 

He pulled up a chair to sit beside the bed. “I would’ve been here sooner, but I had to stop and visit an old friend first.”

 

“No worries. You didn’t even have an obligation to come here in the first place, so…” She shrugged her shoulders.

 

He nodded. “Right. I just wanted to check up on you.”

 

She felt the urge to tell him he didn’t need him to. That she didn’t need to be treated like a child. That she could take care of herself. The same thing she would always tell everyone else. But Idun made her resist that urge. Idun, for once, felt almost grateful.

 

“That’s, uhm,” she cleared her throat, “sweet of you.”

 

He smiled at this. “Don’t mention it. I mean, I know we barely know each other, but I just have this—” He stopped himself, shaking his head. “Never mind. I just remembered you mentioning that you don’t have anyone else, so I figured…” He trailed off with another pause. “Speaking of barely knowing each other… It’s Kirika Nishioka, right?”

 

She pursed her lips, holding back a smile of her own. “You found out my name.”

 

“Uh, yeah, the nurse mentioned it. I also stopped by the police station, though, and spoke with the Officer there. Figured he deserved to know there had been an incident.”

 

“Officer Kurosawa.”

 

“Right. He’s who I got your name from initially.”

 

She nodded. “I see.” She paused. “Thank you for helping me, by the way,” she then said. “The nurse told me a couple Gekkoukan students brought me here, so let your friend know that I thanked them as well.”

 

“Maybe you could thank them yourself.”

 

“Hmm?”

 

“Well, I just…” He sighed. “I wanted to speak with you about a few things.”

 

She raised an eyebrow at the stranger. She already didn’t like where this was going. For now, though, she’d play along. “Like what?”

 

“Well…what even happened that night?” he said. “Who shot you? And how were you able to be running like that when you had been shot in the abdomen? And there was this sort of glowing aura around you, as well. So, what was that? And—?”

 

“Whoa, hold on,” she said. “I’m not even sure if I can answer half those questions.”

 

“For some reason, I’m having a hard time believing that. I mean, you have to know who shot you.”

 

She shrugged her shoulders. “Not really. I mean, it wasn’t anyone in particular. Just some random person, I guess.”

 

“A random person walked up to and, out of the blue, decided to shoot you?”

 

“Gang violence. Ain’t the first time I would’ve gotten involved in something stupid like that.”

 

“I seriously doubt that.”

 

“Then I don’t know what to tell you.” She shrugged again. “Maybe it was that revenge site or whatever the hell it is.”

 

He sighed out of frustration. “C’mon, why do you have to make up excuses? I’m trying to help you, so why can’t you just tell me the truth about what happened? Because there’s obviously more to this than—”

 

That was it. Her patience was running low, and she wasn’t gonna allow Idun to hold her back any longer. “Excuse me, but do you see where we are?”

 

“Huh?” His brow furrowed. He seemed genuinely confused by her sudden inquisition. “Y-yeah, we’re in a hospital.”

 

“Exactly. We are in a hospital right now because I am still recovering from being shot not even a week ago. Right? Isn’t that what you said when you first walked in here?”

 

“Yeah, but—”

 

“Shut up. I ain’t in the mindset to be interrogated.”

 

“I’m not interrogating you.”

 

“Asking me multiple questions is the premise of an interrogation.”

 

“Those weren’t my intentions.”

 

“I don’t care.” She tried to cover up the exasperation in her voice as best she could. “Do you even understand how inconsiderate you’re being?”

 

“I-I’m sorry. I just—”

 

“Get out. Please. I really can’t do this right now.”

 

He paused before nodding his head once. “I understand.” He stood up and walked over to the door, but stopped before opening it. “By the way,” he looked back at her, “I know you didn’t ask, but… Akihiko Sanada.” And he took his leave.

 

Now she let out the exasperated sigh she had been holding back, and closed her eyes. Having lost her appetite, she pushed the tray of food aside. Then she ran a hand through her hair before allowing her head to fall back onto the pillow. Sure, she was pissed that the stranger—Akihiko—came in here and basically jumped straight into questioning the events of the other night, but she probably could’ve handled it a bit more sensibly than she just had. Then again, if she truly was at all like the friend she reminded him of, then she doubted her attitude would sway him. And she was pretty sure she would still see him again at some point to finish up the conversation.

 

Until then, she would continue to recover.


	36. July 14th, 2009

“All vitals seem to be normal,” the Nurse said as she was examining Kirika a couple days later. “The wound seems to have healed properly, as well. Though, the stitches have to stay in for about another week, give or take a couple days. When it looks like they’re starting to come undone, head back this way so we can remove them properly. And, of course, also come back if you feel like you’re having issues of any kind.”

 

“Wait, does that mean—?”

 

She smiled. “Yes, we’ll be able to release you today. But we do have a single request for you.”

 

“Oh? What’s that?”

 

“We’ll need you to stop by the police box at the mall and sit down with Officer Kurosawa. He needs an official report of the incident.”

 

She swallowed hard. “Very well.”

 

With that, she left the hospital and made her way for Paulownia Mall. She set a steady pace for herself, though it was already on the slower side. Idun made her a fast healer, but she didn’t stop the pain any faster. And the pain from this injury was gonna be hard to ignore.

 

She reached the mall and headed straight for the police box. “Sir,” she announced her presence.

 

“Nishioka,” Officer Kurosawa said once he turned around. “I wasn’t expecting you to be released so soon.”

 

“Well, here I am.”

 

“How are you feeling?”

 

“Not too bad.” It wasn’t a total lie.

 

“Come with me.” She followed him out back. “Have a seat. You must be exhausted.”

 

“I’m okay.” She paused. “Don’t feel the need to beat around the bush. Just ask me what you need to know.”

 

“Hmm. All I need is a full report. So tell me exactly what happened.”

 

“Well…” She needed to think quick. “I, uh, had been out for a walk. It was late, yeah, but I needed the fresh air. While I was out and about, I came across a few people who were a bit suspicious. Or seemed to be, at least.” _Hold on_. No. She couldn’t tell him she followed them or eavesdropped on them. That wouldn’t make her look too good. “I-I didn’t really think anything of it, and just continued on my way. But then I unintentionally ended up in the same place as them, and I, uhm, may have overheard some things I never should have heard to begin with.”

 

“What were you thinking going out that late?”

 

“Not the first time I’ve been out that late. I’ve been fine up until now.”

 

He eyed her curiously. “You had gone out for a walk?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Why?”

 

“Like I said, to get some fresh air. Y’know…clear my head.”

 

“What brought you to that particular area, though?”

 

“I dunno. I had just been wandering aimlessly.”

 

“You don’t seem like the aimless type.”

 

“How would you know?”

 

“I can file a better report if you just tell me the full truth, Nishioka.”

 

She let out a heavy sigh. “I was investigating a theory I had come up with based on some rumour I had heard.”

 

“Alone?”

 

“I asked someone to come with me, but he refused.”

 

“Why?”

 

“He said it was stupid and dangerous.”

 

“He seems sensible. So, why didn’t you listen to him? Why did you still go?”

 

“Sir, please, I’m still—”

 

“The sooner we get through this, the sooner you can go.”

 

“Like I said, I was investigating a theory.”

 

He shook his head at her. “What did these suspicious people look like?”

 

“I didn’t get a good look at them.”

 

“How is that possible?”

 

“They had their faces covered. All I can say is that I think it was a group of two guys and a girl.”

 

He paused. “Why don’t you want to help yourself?”

 

“Trust me, that’s not what this is about.”

 

“No?”

 

“Nope.”

 

“Fine. Either way, I’m holding you for the night. That way I can make sure you’ll stay out of trouble.”

 

“Yeah, for one night.”

 

“This could be the night that saves your life.” He looked over his shoulder as he heard the front door open. “Now, if you’ll excuse me.” And he left.

 

Kirika dropped her head into her hands. This was ridiculous. She didn’t need this sort of protection. Then again, Idun didn’t seem to mind the single-night prison sentence all too much. If anything, she seemed almost relieved by it. Kirika just felt trapped, though. And she was tempted to use the Dark Hour to sneak out, but…

 

Hell, maybe Shinjiro was right. Perhaps she was a moron.


	37. July 18th, 2009

Luckily, her single-night prison sentence had been exactly that. A single night. Officer Kurosawa released Kirika the following morning, and she had been more than happy to leave. She didn’t return to the brick house, though. She didn’t need to be lectured. So, she spent her time roaming the small city. Getting herself acclimated to walking with her new injury. It still hurt to put too much pressure on her left side, but at least she was working on strengthening it.

 

After about four days, she noticed her stitching was beginning to come undone, so she made her way back to the hospital. She was halfway there when she decided to take a break. She sat down on the closest bench and stretched her leg a bit. Not too long passed before she had company.

 

“Yo,” Akihiko said.

 

She glanced up at him. “Hi.”

 

“It’s good to see you out of the hospital.”

 

“I’m heading back now.”

 

“Why? Are you okay?”

 

“Stitching.”

 

“Oh. Well, do you want help getting the rest of the way there?”

 

“Tch. I don’t need help.”

 

“I know you don’t need it. That’s why I asked if you wanted it.”

 

Her breath caught in her throat. She was more than ready to still tell him no, but for some reason, she didn’t. “Fine,” she said instead.

 

So, he walked with her the rest of the way to the hospital. And they walked in silence. Then when they arrived, they headed inside to where it was Kirika needed to be. She stepped up to the front desk to inform the Nurse of her situation. Then she took a seat next to Akihiko in the waiting area.

 

“I don’t know how long I’ll be, so—”

 

“I don’t mind waiting,” he said.

 

“Of course you don’t.”

 

His gaze fell to the floor. “Unless you want me to go.”

 

There was that twinge of guilt she felt. Just like when he had asked her if he bothered her. Ugh. “No, it’s fine.”

 

They fell silent again as they waited. About twenty minutes later, Kirika got called to be helped. She stood and looked down at Akihiko.

 

“I’ll be here,” he said with a smile. A reassuring smile.

 

She nodded and headed out back. The same nurse who had taken care of her was present, and she assisted the Doctor who removed the stitching. Once everything was done and over with and he decided all was well, he dismissed Kirika. By this point, about another twenty or so minutes had passed. She returned to the waiting room and Akihiko stood up practically as soon as he saw her.

 

“How is everything?” he said.

 

“Fine,” she said. “We can go.”

 

So, they left.

 

“C’mon, let’s head to the Shrine,” he said. “It’s more private and—”

 

“Private?”

 

“Yeah, well…” He sighed. “I was hoping—”

 

“Is that why you tracked me down?”

 

“What? No. I didn’t track you down.”

 

“No? So, you just happened to be heading in that direction at the same time as me?” She shook her head. “Never mind. Whatever. I’ll go with you.”

 

He smiled sheepishly. “Great. Let’s go, then.” They made their way for Port Island Station where they waited for the train to bring them to Iwatodai. “How about we grab a bite to eat first?” he said as they walked by the few restaurants at the strip mall.

 

“How about we don’t?”

 

“I’ll pay.”

 

“I ain’t hungry.”

 

That was the end of it. They kept moving in silence until they finally arrived at the Shrine. Once they got there, they sat down on the bench.

 

“All right, go ahead,” Kirika spoke up.

 

He nodded his head once. “So…you were shot during the Dark Hour, correct?”

 

“Correct.”

 

“Which means you remain aware during the Dark Hour.”

 

“I do.”

 

“Which also means whoever shot you—”

 

“—also remains aware. Yes.”

 

He hesitated. “Who was it?”

 

“I truly don’t know who they were.”

 

“They? There was more than one person.”

 

“There were three.”

 

“Hmm.” He took this into consideration. “When you ran into me, it was right before the Dark Hour ended. Initially, there was some sort of…glowing light around you. What was that light?”

 

“I can’t say for sure, but it’s probably safe to assume it was Idun.”

 

“Who’s Idun?”

 

“She’s my, uh…” she swallowed hard, “Persona.”

 

His eyes widened. “S-so, you _are_ another Persona-user?”

 

“I’m assuming you are, as well.”

 

“Yeah.” He practically jumped to his feet. “I’m part of this club at Gekkoukan High. The Specialised Extracurricular Execution Squad. Otherwise known as SEES. A-and being a school club is technically just our cover. We’re a small group of students who have the Potential and we go to Tartarus and fight Shadows and—”

 

“And what’s your point?”

 

He calmed himself and sat back down. “Each of our Personas have different skills. Types of abilities. For instance, my Persona uses Zio attacks and—”

 

“Zio attacks?”

 

“Electricity.”

 

She nodded. “I see.”

 

“Yeah. So…what exactly is your Persona’s ability?”

 

“She’s a defender and a healer.”

 

“Oh, that makes sense as to why you were able to reach us after you got shot, then. She practically gave you an adrenaline boost until you reached safety.”

 

“An adrenaline boost?” She considered this. “Yeah, I guess that very well could’ve been what happened.”

 

“Either way, it’s an incredible ability and no one else in the group has it. I mean, some of us can heal, but none of us can pull off anything like that.” He paused. “How did you summon her?”

 

“She sorta just senses whenever I’m in danger and…shows up. It sometimes takes a good amount of convincing, though.”

 

“So, you don’t need an Evoker?”

 

“An Evoker?”

 

“Oh, we use Evokers to summon our Personas. They resemble guns, but they’re entirely harmless.”

 

“Ah.” She nodded her head. She already knew that. First, because she had used Akihiko’s that one night she helped him. Even if he didn’t know it. Second, because Shinjiro had explained it to her. But Kirika figured she might as well still amuse Akihiko. “Any other questions?”

 

“Yeah. Can you protect other people as well as yourself?”

 

“I’ve recently learned that I can, in fact, do so.”

 

“Great. So, I guess my point to all of this is that… Well, I’m wondering if you’d be willing to join the group. I mean, like I said, some of us do have healing abilities, but having someone around who’s strictly a protector would be even better. It’d be more reassuring, almost.”

 

“Thanks,” she stood up, “but no thanks.”

 

“Huh? Why not?”

 

“Ain’t interested.”

 

She began to walk away, but the hand on her shoulder stopped her. A hand that sent a shock coursing through her body, causing her to jolt away from him. They both paused for a moment, unaware of if the other had also felt it or not.

 

Akihiko then shook his head. “You didn’t even think about it.”

 

“I don’t need to think about it.”

 

He reached for her again. “Please—”

 

She shrugged away from him. “What? Am I supposed to join and just let you guys utilise my abilities until they’re not needed anymore? Then what? I get cast aside?”

 

“That’s not even close to what I meant. That’s not what would happen, either.”

 

“Whatever. Doesn’t change the fact that I ain’t interested.”

 

He hurried in front of her before she could get away. “Would you at least consider the offer?” He paused. “It would give you a constant roof over your head.”

 

“I have a place to stay.”

 

“Please, just consider it.” He sighed. “Okay. In two days, I’m going away with the group for a few days. That should give you plenty of time to thoroughly think over the offer. When I get back, you can tell me your final decision.”

 

“And what if I haven’t changed my mind by that point?”

 

“Then I will leave you alone for good and we can carry on as strangers. But you have to promise me you’ll actually consider it.” He paused. “Deal?”

 

She rolled her eyes. “Fine. Deal.”

 

“Say it.”

 

“Say what?”

 

“Say that you promise.”

 

“C’mon, don’t be so ridiculous,” she said. “You sound like a child.” Damn shame he was giving her some sort of look that she couldn’t stay angry at. “Fine. I promise.”

 

He broke into a small smile. “Thank you. I appreciate that.”

 

“Whatever.”

 

“By the way…”

 

“Hmm?”

 

“You’re the girl who helped me that night, aren’t you?”

 

She froze. Shit. She didn’t think he would figure it out that quickly. “Gotta be a little more specific than that.”

 

“The night I was injured during the Dark Hour. It was also the first night one of the giant Shadows popped up in the city. Either way, there was a girl in a hoodie who had shown up and used my Evoker and distracted the Shadow long enough for me to get a bit of a head start on it.” He paused. “That girl was you, wasn’t it? That’s why you’ve seemed so familiar to me.”

 

“Guess that makes us even now.”

 

“Kirika…”

 

She practically cringed at the sound of him saying her name. Yet, at the same time, she only wanted to hear him say it again. “Have fun on your little trip,” she said. “See you when you get back.”

 

With that, she walked away. And she refused to look back despite how much she wanted to. Despite how much Idun wanted her to stay. She let out a heavy sigh. Hell, what was it about this guy that Idun was so fond of? And why now? Or maybe it was just the idea of being a part of a group for once in her life. She shook her head of the thoughts and kept walking. With a slight limp. Hmm…

 

Next thing she knew, her mind was on Shinjiro. She hadn’t seen him since the night of the full moon. She had purposefully been avoiding the brick house just so she could avoid him. She was dreading seeing him again, after all, because then she would have to admit that he had been right. She would wait one more day, though. And for now…

 

Well, all she could do was try to keep herself out of trouble.


	38. July 19th, 2009

It was nearly six o’clock by the time Kirika convinced herself to make her way back to the brick house. Not until after picking up a cup of coffee and a cup of tea, though. When she arrived, she skillfully climbed through the broken window. Despite the time, she wasn’t surprised to find Shinjiro sitting in the armchair. She handed him the cup of tea, and he took it without even bothering to glance up at her.

 

“Where have you been?” he spoke up.

 

“You ask like that you actually care.”

 

“Tch.”

 

“I’ve been at the hospital,” she said.

 

That got his attention. His lifted his head to set his gaze on her and noticed her slight limp before she sat down on the futon. “The hell happened? Sprain a limb or something?”

 

“Got shot.”

 

Now his eyes widened a bit and he sat forward. “You what?”

 

“I got shot.”

 

He paused, taking this information in. “When?”

 

“The night of the full moon.”

 

“Damn it. I told you not to go out there.”

 

She took a sip of her coffee, keeping her cool. “Guess it’s just another thing to add to the list of stupid things I’ve done. And you were right.” Another sip. “Idun isn’t fast enough to beat a bullet. Though, she did give me one hell of an adrenaline rush after the fact to make up for it.”

 

He was staring at her with a sort of expression that told her he wasn’t sure if he should be impressed or pissed. “How can you be so nonchalant about this?” he said.

 

“Well, I didn’t die and I healed relatively quickly.” She shrugged her shoulders. “So, if you ask me, I can’t really complain.”

 

“Yeah? Those couple of factors just make it all better?”

 

“It also helps that I know you don’t give a shit.”

 

“Excuse me?”

 

“Two weeks, Aragaki. It’s been almost two frigging weeks and it’s not like you ever tried tracking me down to make sure I was okay or anything.”

 

“Didn’t realise I was supposed to. Besides, I gave you a fair warning.”

 

“Yeah, you said you weren’t coming after me this time.”

 

“Exactly.”

 

“Tch.”

 

They fell silent and both just sat, sipping at their drinks. Kirika’s eyes were down, but she could feel Shinjiro’s gaze burning right through her. She swallowed hard.

 

“You’re a moron,” he spoke up.

 

“Well, if you had come with me—”

 

“Then we both would’ve ended up getting shot. Having company wouldn’t have made a difference.”

 

She sighed. “Don’t worry. I’ll be more careful next time.”

 

“Next time? You’re already planning for a next time.”

 

“Well…” She thought for a moment. “You know Akihiko Sanada, right?”

 

His brow furrowed. “Huh? Where the hell did that name come from?”

 

“A few weeks ago, when you helped those kids in the back alley from Gekkoukan, you mentioned the name Aki,” she said. “You were referring to Akihiko Sanada at the time, weren’t you?”

 

He paused. “Seriously, where did you hear that name?”

 

“He asked me to join SEES.”

 

“Hold on.” He stood up, putting his cup down. “I’m a little lost here.” Another pause as he collected himself. “Do you know Aki?”

 

“We’re…acquainted,” she said.

 

“Well enough for him to ask you to join the damn group?”

 

“We’ve had a good few encounters over the last couple of months. And the night I was shot, Idun just so happened to lead me to the group. They’re the ones who helped me get to the hospital.”

 

“And now Aki wants you to join?”

 

“I said no, but he’s asking me to at least consider it.”

 

He sat back down, stuffing one hand back into a pocket. “Why’d you say no?”

 

“I’m not really a fan of being used for a single purpose.”

 

“Hmm.” He thought for a moment. “I left that group almost two years ago.”

 

“Two years? So, you stopped using your Persona after you left the group?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“And why’d you leave the group?”

 

“Why’d you leave the city?”

 

“Touché.” She sighed. “Any suggestions?”

 

“Tch. It’s your own damn choice. If you wanna join, go right ahead. If not, whatever. Makes no difference to me.” He paused to take a sip of his tea. “Does Aki know that you and I know each other?”

 

“He shouldn’t. I mean, I haven’t mentioned you. Then again, I only just learned his name not even a week ago. So, I’ve never had a reason to mention you.”

 

“Ah.” He nodded. “Well, like I said, I don’t give a shit what you choose to do.”

 

“Of course you don’t.” She finished her coffee and cleared her throat. Then she took a deep breath. “If I joined…would you consider coming back with me?”

 

“You already know the answer to that.”

 

“So…you won’t rejoin?”

 

“Seriously, did Aki put you up to this?”

 

“He doesn’t know we know each other.”

 

He scoffed at her. “Yeah, whatever. Why the hell would I want to rejoin that stupid group anyway?”

 

“Wow. Talk about hostile.”

 

“Shut up.” Now he was scowling. “What do you think you’re gonna do?”

 

“I didn’t think you cared.”

 

“Would you quit it with that?”

 

She repressed the chuckle. “Either way, I’m not sure yet. He said the group is going away for a few days, so I have some time to think about it.”

 

“Tch. Glad they’re able to find time to relax.”

 

“Well, they actually go to school and explore Tartarus, so—”

 

“Don’t lecture me. I got better things to do. And you aren’t attending school, either, so you’re one to talk.”

 

“Yeah, yeah…” She paused. “So, exactly how long have you and Sanada known each other?”

 

He shook his head. “No. I ain’t doing that reminiscing bullshit.”

 

“It’s a simple question and it doesn’t require you to reminisce.”

 

“I don’t talk about the past.” He stood up again. “Now, I don’t know about you, but I got places to be.”

 

“Sure you do.”

 

Shinjiro froze on the spot. She could see his tension rising just by how rigid his shoulders went. Then he stuffed his hands deep into his pockets and continued to walk away.

 

She pursed her lips. “Later.”

 

He didn’t react that time. Kirika remained seated, staring blankly at the empty coffee cup in her hands. She had at least a week to make a decision. One week.

 

A lot can change in a single week.


	39. July 23rd, 2009

Although she knew she had to be thinking about the offer, Kirika still spent the next few days around the city reading palms and cards just to keep her mind off it. She couldn’t be constantly thinking over it or else it would only drive her insane. And she wasn’t sure exactly when Akihiko was going to be back, but she figured four days meant her time was almost up.

 

For whatever reason, she still wanted one last say from Shinjiro. She wanted a legitimate opinion from him. So, after half a day’s worth of readings and three cups of coffee, she made her way for the brick house.

 

While she was waiting for the tram at Port Island Station, her gaze kept moving towards the alley. Something was off, and Idun could feel it, too. So, she made her way to the back entrance, moving into the area cautiously. She knew better than to go barging in. And soon enough, she heard voices. She let herself continue moving forward until she could see who the voices belonged to, but they still couldn’t see her.

 

And there was Shinjiro, standing with the group who had shot her. Of all people.

 

“Jin,” the shirtless young man said, “give him the capsules.”

 

Jin pulled something out of his pocket and handed it to Shinjiro.

 

“Thanks,” Shinjiro said. He stood up, getting ready to walk away. “I’ll pay you the same as—”

 

“Hold up,” Jin said.

 

“This time, information will suffice,” the shirtless young man said, taking over. “Your acquaintances have been busy lately.” He paused, as if waiting for some sort of reaction. “I’m referring to their activities on nights when the moon is full. They’ve spent a great deal of time in the Tower as well.” Another pause. More waiting. “Why did they take this burden upon themselves?” Shinjiro still didn’t respond. “You do know, don’t you?” the shirtless young man went on. “But you don’t wish to say? Is it because they are your friends?”

 

“No,” Shinjiro finally spoke up. “I’ve got nothing to do with them.”

 

“Then tell us.”

 

“Tch.” He cocked his head to the side. “I don’t know the details, but…” He let out a heavy sigh. “Supposedly, if you destroy all those creatures, then the tower will disappear, and with it, the Dark Hour.”

 

Kirika’s eyes widened at this. Akihiko had failed to mention that to her when he was trying to persuade her. Huh. Maybe joining wouldn’t be such a bad idea, after all…

 

All in all, she didn’t want to hear anything else. Didn’t need to. So, she snuck back out of the alley and made her way around to the station. Lucky for her, she was able to catch the next tram before any of them popped out. Once she was in Iwatodai, she made her way for the brick house. From there, she awaited Shinjiro’s return.

 

“Nishioka,” he said when he saw her, almost as if he hadn’t been expecting her.

 

She sat curled up in the armchair, her gaze set on nothing. “Now I understand why you don’t wanna go rejoin the group,” she started.

 

“Huh?”

 

“You’re too busy selling them out.”

 

“The hell are you talking about?”

 

She looked over at him. “You know damn well what I’m talking about.”

 

“I really don’t, though. So how about you start making sense?”

 

“The professionals.”

 

His brow furrowed, and then his eyes widened. “It ain’t what you think.”

 

“No? So, you’re not working with them?”

 

“No, it’s not anything like that.”

 

“So, you just buy pills from them and that’s the extent of your relationship?” Now he fell silent, and she sat forward in the armchair. “What even are those capsules? What are they meant for?”

 

“Don’t matter.”

 

“Tch. And I’m the moron.” She shook her head as she rose to her feet. “Look who’s being ridiculous now. I mean, what the hell are you thinking? How could you sell out your best friend like that?”

 

“What makes you think Aki and I are friends?”

 

“Akihiko has talked about an old friend of his more than once, and I can only assume he was referring to you. Especially since he told me that I remind him of this friend.”

 

“Whatever. Either way, I didn’t sell them out.”

 

“You gave them crucial information. Ugh. I can’t frigging believe this.”

 

“What are you getting so worked up for?”

 

“Doesn’t matter. By the way,” she took a deep breath, “I’ve made up my mind.”

 

“Oh yeah?”

 

She nodded, swallowing hard. “Now that I know there’s a possible way to eliminate the Dark Hour, I’ve decided that I will join the group.”

 

“Good for you.”

 

“Yeah. So, you no longer gotta worry about making sure I don’t pull any stupid stunts again. I am no longer your burden.” When he only scoffed at her in response, she clenched her jaw and turned to leave. “One last tidbit of information, Aragaki,” she faced him again, “your pale buddy who goes around without a shirt. He’s the one who shot me.”

 

Shinjiro quickly glanced at her before his gaze dropped to the floor. “Kirika…”

 

“Don’t bother.”

 

With that, she took off. And she made her way straight for the Shrine. When she got there, she saw that Akihiko was already present. Not that that was very surprising.

 

“Kirika,” he said when he saw her. He chuckled. “Talk about good timing, but you should really be more careful. You don’t wanna force too much pressure—”

 

“Shut up,” she said. Then she shrugged her shoulders. “I’ll join.”


	40. July 24th, 2009

Everything that happened after Kirika said she would join the group was a bit of a blur. She ended up following Akihiko back to his dorm building and spent the night there, but she didn’t speak with any of the other members. It wasn’t until the following day she even realised just how exhausted she had been since she didn’t wake up until the early afternoon.

 

Still groggy, she carefully made her way to the first floor of the dorm. Her hip was always at its worst first thing after waking up. Then, as she descended the bottommost stairwell, voices filled the air.

 

“What were you thinking?” a female voice said. “How could you ask her to join without consulting the rest of us first?”

 

“I didn’t think it’d be that big of a deal,” Akihiko said. “I mean, she’s more than capable. Hell, she can summon her Persona without an Evoker. Not that that should really make a difference in the matter, but still…”

 

“We know nothing about her,” the girl went on. “The extent of our relationship with her is taking her to the hospital the night she found us after she was shot.”

 

“Maybe that wasn’t just coincidence.”

 

“You think it was fate?”

 

“Maybe. I dunno. But I do know she’s also the girl who saved me back in April. Y’know, the night the very first Shadow popped up. So, she’s not just some random person off the street.”

 

She sighed. “I don’t think the Chairman will be very happy about this, either.”

 

“If my being here is gonna cause an issue,” Kirika then announced her presence, having heard more than enough, “I can leave.” She joined them in the lounge. “It’s really not a problem.”

 

“No, you don’t have to go anywhere,” Akihiko said. “She’s just a bit upset with me since I didn’t discuss the possibility of you joining with the rest of the group.”

 

“If it’s any consolation,” she said to the other girl, “I wasn’t aware of that when he asked me to join.”

 

“Oh, thanks.”

 

“That’s all beside the point now,” the red-haired young woman said. “The point is that we don’t know anything about you.”

 

“And I don’t know anything about any of you, either,” she said. “To me, that puts us on even terms.”

 

“Hmph. I’m sorry, but you cannot stay here.”

 

“C’mon, at least give her a chance,” Akihiko said. “Let’s wait for the others to get back, and then we can sit down in the Command Room and sort this out as a group. You can ask her any questions you want answers to, and we’ll go from there. Don’t dismiss her just like that, though.”

 

The young woman considered this. “Fine. Then I will be waiting in the Command Room with Aigis for now. Once the others are back, send them up immediately.”

 

“Thank you.”

 

With that, she headed upstairs. Akihiko turned to face Kirika.

 

“You didn’t have to defend me like that,” she said.

 

“Hey, it’s not a problem.”

 

“Why do you want me in the group so badly?”

 

“I just think you’d be a good addition.”

 

“Because of my abilities?”

 

“No, I already told you that’s not the case.”

 

She nodded. “Right. Well, this seems to be off to a bad start already.”

 

“And that’s my fault, not yours.”

 

Just then, the front door opened and four more people entered the dorm.

 

“Afternoon, Senpai,” a teal-haired girl said.

 

“See, Yuka-tan, she’s definitely the same girl,” a guy wearing a backwards baseball cap said. He turned his focus on Kirika. “You’re the one who saved our buddy here from being beaten in that back alley before Senpai showed up.”

 

“Wow, you sure do have a good memory,” Kirika said.

 

He smiled smugly. “No one could forget a face like yours.”

 

She blinked a couple times. “Respect your Senpai.”

 

Now his eyes widened a bit. “S-sorry.”

 

The girl in pink rolled her eyes. “Learn to keep your mouth shut, Stupei.”

 

“We gotta head up to the Command Room immediately,” Akihiko then spoke up.

 

“Huh? What’s going on?” the guy with the baseball cap said.

 

Shit. It was really bothering Kirika that she couldn’t remember his name. She shook her head. “I’ll give you one lucky guess.”

 

Akihiko sighed softly. “C’mon.”

 

With that, the six of them headed up to the fourth floor of the dorm. They shuffled into the Command Room, Akihiko entering last. Everyone seated themselves, except for the red-haired young woman and Kirika. They both remained standing.

 

“Is everyone comfortable?” the red-haired girl spoke up.

 

“Not really,” Kirika said.

 

“Hmph.”

 

“Let’s begin with formal introductions,” Akihiko said.

 

The young woman paused. “Very well.” She straightened herself a bit. “I am Mitsuru Kirijo, founder of SEES.” She looked towards the rest of the group. “Proceed.”

 

“I am Aigis,” the girl with short blonde hair said. “I am an anti-shadow weapon.”

 

Huh. Kirika decided to leave that one alone for now.

 

“I’m Fuuka Yamagishi.”

 

“My name is Yukari Takeba.”

 

“Junpei Iori.”

 

“Minato Arisato.”

 

“And I introduced myself at the hospital,” Akihiko said, rounding up the group. “Your turn.”

 

Kirika nodded, swallowing hard. “Kirika Nishioka.”

 

“Moving on,” Mitsuru said right away. “What is your Persona’s name?”

 

“Idun.”

 

“What are her abilities?”

 

“Uhm. She has healing abilities and recovery abilities and can form these sort of barriers or shields or whatever. Basically, she’s a protector. Strictly defence skills.”

 

“And how do you go about summoning her without an Evoker?”

 

“Persuasion.” She paused at the raised eyebrow she received for that answer. “What? I’m sure the rest of you could summon your Personas without those Evoker things, too, it would just take a hell of a lot of effort.”

 

“Hmm.” She straightened herself again. “When did you awaken to your ability?”

 

“I was eleven.”

 

“And what triggered it?”

 

She froze before taking a deep breath. “Doesn’t matter.”

 

“Yes, it does.”

 

“It ain’t important.”

 

“I find it quite suspicious that you’re so unwilling to tell us.”

 

“Mitsuru—” Akihiko spoke up.

 

“You know what? I’ve changed my mind. I don’t need this shit,” Kirika said. “Sorry for wasting your time and thanks for wasting mine.” And she turned to leave.

 

Now Akihiko jumped to his feet. “Kirika, wait—”

 

She stormed out of the Command Room without another word. Though, she didn’t go very far. She went down a few steps before taking a seat on the stairs with a heavy sigh. She stretched her left leg out before dropping her face in her hands. And it wasn’t long before she felt the presence of someone beside her.

 

“I’m sorry,” Akihiko said.

 

“I get that not wanting to talk about my past may sound shady, but—”

 

“You don’t have to explain yourself. I’m not gonna make you talk about it. And I’ll make sure Mitsuru doesn’t pursue the topic, either. Just…please, come back inside.”

 

She sighed again. “If she asks me again—”

 

“She won’t.”

 

She clenched her jaw. “Fine.”

 

He smiled and stood back up. Kirika followed suit and they returned to the Command Room together. Akihiko went back to his seat, while she and Mitsuru continued to remain on their feet.

 

“My apologies,” Mitsuru said.

 

“If you need an answer that badly, let’s just say I went through a traumatic experience and that’s what triggered my Persona,” Kirika said. “Okay?”

 

“Okay.”

 

“Any other questions?”

 

“Could you give us at least one example of how you’ve protected someone other than yourself with your ability?”

 

For a moment, she panicked. But then she remembered… “Yes. During the full moon last month. There was this girl staying here and she walked out of the dorm during the Dark Hour, seemingly in some sort of trance. She kept saying Yamagishi’s name and I followed her and shielded her from other Shadows while she made her way to Tartarus.”

 

Fuuka’s eyes widened. “Natsuki-san.”

 

“Huh. Well, that would explain how she got there safely,” Akihiko said.

 

“I suppose so,” Mitsuru said. “How did you know to be here for her?”

 

“Idun has a way of subconsciously leading me to where I’m needed,” Kirika said. “So, I guess I’m always in the right place at the wrong time.”

 

“Is that why you were at the back alley the night the three of us investigated it?” Yukari spoke up.

 

“Yes and no. I had been planning on investigating myself, anyhow, but me being there to help out the three of you was just a fateful bonus.”

 

Akihiko’s brow furrowed slightly. “You were there that night?”

 

“I was.”

 

“Yeah, like I said downstairs,” Junpei started, “she’s the reason Minato didn’t get the shit beaten out of him.”

 

He took this into consideration. “Like I mentioned before, as well,” he went on, “she’s the reason I was able to escape the very first Shadow that appeared outside of Tartarus. She risked using my Evoker and everything. And I say it like that because there was no way she knew what it could do at the time. Either way, though, she shielded me and distracted the thing long enough for me to get a head start on it before it reached the dorm.”

 

“He’s right,” Mitsuru said. “Picking up a gun-like object and pointing it at your head and pulling the trigger was quite the risky move.” She pursed her lips. “How’d you come up with the idea to do that?”

 

Kirika shrugged her shoulders. “Honestly…I just took a chance. Idun told me it would be okay and I trusted her. I don’t like her, but I still always listen to her. And she almost never leads me astray.”

 

Now her brow furrowed. “What do you mean you don’t like her?”

 

“It has to do with my traumatic experience.”

 

“Let’s leave it at that, then,” Akihiko said before his dorm mate had the chance to make any other inquiries on the topic. “Do you have any other questions for her?”

 

“Just one other,” Mitsuru said. “What are you fighting for?”

 

Kirika shook her head a little. “I ain’t a fighter.” She paused, swallowing hard. “I’m a defender.”

 

She nodded. “Thank you. If you would please excuse yourself now so we can discuss as a group.”

 

“Just…can I say one last thing?”

 

“Of course.”

 

“Your distrust of me doesn’t make me the person you assume I am.”

 

With that, she turned to take her leave. Akihiko gave her a quick smile before she headed out and her stomach flipped. Nervously? Eagerly? It was a strange sensation, to say the least.

 

Then she waited on the stairs again. It felt like forever had passed, but she was sure it had been only a couple minutes. At long last, though, Akihiko exited the Command Room. She jumped to her feet at the sight of him.

 

“Well, as a group, we have unanimously decided to give you a chance,” he said.

 

Kirika’s eyes widened a bit. “Seriously?”

 

He smiled. “Yes, seriously. Only person we still need to talk it over with is the Chairman, but I really don’t think he’ll have an issue with it.”

 

“Wow,” she said. “This is kinda incredible.”

 

Now he laughed. “Let’s grab a bite to eat to celebrate.”

 

“Thank you, but I’m not really hungry.”

 

“C’mon, I know for a fact you haven’t eaten all day. So we are going out to get something to eat.”

 

She rolled her eyes. “Fine.”

 

Just then, Mitsuru exited the Command Room. “Nishioka,” she said. “I just wanted to apologise again for my behaviour.”

 

“It’s fine,” she said. “I’m used to it.”

 

“You’re used to it?”

 

She smiled, shaking it off. “Really, you don’t have to worry about it.”

 

“Well…thank you, then.”

 

“And thank you, as well.”

 

With that, Kirika and Akihiko headed out. And for the rest of the night, she found it pretty hard to stop smiling.


	41. July 25th, 2009

The next day, Kirika found herself outside Paulownia Mall with her makeshift station set up. She made it to about 2:30 before feeling like she was at a total loss for energy. So she packed up and made her way inside the mall to the café. She stopped in for two cups of coffee before heading to Port Island Station. Before she could get far, though—

 

“Yo,” Akihiko greeted her.

 

She froze for a quick moment, almost surprised by his sudden presence. “Hey, what are you doing here?”

 

“Stopping by the police box. C’mon.”

 

“Uhm. Okay.”

 

So, she followed him into the police box. “Afternoon, sir,” he greeted the officer.

 

“Afternoon,” Officer Kurosawa said. “What brings you two here?”

 

“I just wanted to let you know that Kirika is part of SEES now.” He looked over at her. “Kurosawa-san provides us with weapons and armor.”

 

She raised an eyebrow at them. “I’m sorry, but you give a bunch of high school students weaponry?”

 

“Believe it or not, I do trust these kids. Plus, I’m not an idiot. I’m aware something is off in this city.”

 

“And you’re okay with a bunch of teenagers handling things?”

 

He shook his head at her. “Keep this one out of trouble, Sanada. I would expect nothing less of you, after all.”

 

Akihiko chuckled. “Of course, sir.”

 

“Hey, I can handle myself,” Kirika said.

 

“Right, that’s why you got shot.”

 

“Tch. Whatever.” She scoffed at him, though she was laughing. “I’m leaving now.”

 

“I’ll go with you.”

 

With that, they bid their farewells to Officer Kurosawa and made their way for Port Island Station. They sat in silence as they waited for the tram, but Kirika couldn’t shake Idun’s nagging. It seemed she was _needed_ in the alley. How was she supposed to get there with Akihiko right beside her, though? Hmm…

 

She began rummaging through her shoulder bag, and then through the pockets of her hoodie. “Shit,” she said under her voice.

 

“What’s up?” he said.

 

“I think I lost my deck somewhere along the walk here.” That was a lie.

 

“Your deck?”

 

“My tarot deck. I’m gonna go retrace me steps and—”

 

“I’ll help you.”

 

“No, you don’t have to. Get back to the dorm and do what you need to do. I’ll just meet up with you there later.”

 

“Are you sure?”

 

“I’m positive.”

 

He nodded his head. Then he boarded the tram once it arrived. And once it was gone, Kirika made her way towards the back alley. Voices drifted from it, and she moved close enough to hear the conversation.

 

“…It is up to each individual how he will use the strength granted him,” a male voice was saying. “But to erase the Dark Hour would be denying the very power they possess. We cannot tolerate that.” It was the voice of the shirtless guy.

 

“Do whatever you want.” Shinjiro said.

 

“Hold it,” a third male voice spoke up. That must’ve been…Jin? Yeah, that sounded about right. “What’re you gonna do? I know they asked you to come back.”

 

“You’re starting to piss me off,” Shinjiro said.

 

“They’re going down. You hear me? And if you’re on their side, then you’re going down, too.”

 

“Like I said before, it doesn’t concern me.”

 

A few moments later, Shinjiro stepped out of the alley and directly into Kirika’s path. He froze when he saw her. “The hell you doing here?” he said. “Shouldn’t you be getting comfortable at the dorm?” He paused, waiting on a retort she wasn’t planning on giving him. “Tch. You should get out of here. If they see you, they might—”

 

“Whose side are you even on?” she finally spoke up. She then shook her head. “Never mind.” And she walked away to board the next tram.

 

“Hey, did you find your deck?” Akihiko said as soon as she entered the dorm.

 

“Huh?” she said. “Oh. Y-yeah, I found it.”

 

“That’s good.”

 

She forced a smile. “Yeah. Well, I’m exhausted and my hip is killing me, so I’m just gonna head straight to bed.” She made her way for the stairs, but stopped when her eyes landed on a new face. The face of a child. “I’m sorry, who are you?”

 

“Oh, hello.” He bowed to her. “I’m Ken Amada. I’ll be staying here during summer break, but I promise not to get in your way.”

 

She opened her mouth to question it further, but decided against it. Then she headed up to the third floor before anything else could be said. She moved down the hallway to the very last door on the right and let herself in. And after closing the door behind her, she collapsed onto the bed. But it wasn’t long before there was a knock at the door.

 

“Do you have a moment?” Mitsuru said from the other side.

 

“Come in,” she said, sitting up as the door opened.

 

“I got in touch with the Chairman earlier this evening, but it’ll be another few days before he’s at the dorm again,” she said. “Unfortunately, we can’t provide you with an Evoker of your own until he has met you.”

 

“That’s not a problem.”

 

She paused. “That also means you won’t be able to join us on trips to Tartarus until you have been properly equipped.”

 

“Okay. No worries.”

 

“Hmm. Very well, then. Goodnight.”

 

She smiled, pursing her lips. “Night.”

 

As soon as Mitsuru shut the door, Kirika fell back onto the bed, arms and legs sprawled out. She stared at the blank ceiling, mind wandering off to thoughts of fights and battle wounds and the like. She wasn’t typically the type to promote violence, but she knew this case had to be different. How else were the Shadows supposed to be eradicated? That much she could make herself understand. What she didn’t understand was the drive the group had to keep fighting. She hoped they all had good enough reasons to fight. Reasons other than Tartarus and the Dark Hour. Personal reasons.

 

Otherwise, what would be the point?


	42. July 29th, 2009

Kirika took the next few days to adjust to living life at the dorm. There were still some instances when she found herself walking towards the brick house whenever she went out, realising she was heading in the wrong direction once she was already about halfway along. The routine was embedded in her mind. Worse yet, she couldn’t remember the last time she lived in a legitimate housing complex, which didn’t make adjusting any easier for her.

 

It was a few days into the group’s summer break—which was also an adjustment since she wasn’t used to being around so many people so constantly—when she found herself unable to fall asleep. So, she crept out of her room and made her way down to the lounge. She figured she would step outside, get some fresh air, and then head back to bed. No harm done, right?

 

Except when she reached the lounge, she came across Akihiko.

 

“What are you doing up?” she said.

 

He looked over at her. “I could ask you the same thing.”

 

“I couldn’t sleep.”

 

“So, what’d you come down here for?”

 

“I was gonna step outside to get some fresh air.”

 

“Well, I was gonna go for a run if you want to accompany me.”

 

“At this hour?”

 

He paused. “That sounds vaguely familiar.”

 

She smiled. “Shut up. I’m serious. You’re gonna go out for a run right now? Even though the Dark Hour starts in about fifteen minutes?”

 

“Not the first time I’ve done it,” he said.

 

“That’s how you got caught by the Shadow that night I helped you, ain’t it?” She rolled her eyes. “Yet, I’m the one who needs to be kept out of trouble.”

 

He chuckled. “You gonna join me or not?”

 

“I would, but I can’t run right now.” She gestured to her abdomen. “Don’t think it would really end well.”

 

“Then I’ll switch it up and do a light jog instead. I mean, I wouldn’t wanna get too far ahead of you.”

 

“Yeah, you might go to turn around and run right into me.”

 

Now he shook his head, though he was laughing again. “Shut up.” He exited the dorm, and she followed after him. “So, we’ll do a quick lap around the city and be back before the Dark Hour ends.”

 

She gestured ahead of her. “Lead the way.”

 

And they were off, Akihiko jogging a little bit ahead of Kirika as she trailed along behind him. They were quiet, just enjoying one another’s company. And soon enough, the Dark Hour began, but they continued on as if it was normal. Then again, in a way, it kind of was normal.

 

“Not to sound rude,” she spoke up, “but what’s your obsession with training?”

 

“I need to get stronger.”

 

“Why?”

 

“So I can be strong enough.”

 

“Strong enough for what?”

 

He paused. “For…anything.”

 

“Hmm. Does everyone in this group have a rough past or something?”

 

“Honestly,” he slowed to a stop, “yeah.”

 

She stopped beside him. “Hah. Well, that sucks.”

 

All of a sudden, the sound of static filled the air.

 

“What’s that?” she said.

 

“The transceiver,” he said, almost seeming confused. He pulled a device out of his pocket. “Mitsuru? I’m here.”

 

“Akihiko,” Mitsuru said.  “Yamagishi has detected a Shadow outside of Tartarus.”

 

Now his eyes widened. “What?”

 

“She said it’s located near the Shrine. Do you think you could make your way in that direction?”

 

“Yeah, we’re already close by anyway.”

 

“We?”

 

“Kirika’s with me.”

 

“Oh. Very well, then. The two of you head over and contact me once you get there.”

 

“Got it.” He put the device back in his pocket. “Let’s go.”

 

“Special equipment, I presume?” Kirika said as they backtracked, making their way to the Shrine.

 

“Well, yeah. I mean, we needed to be able to communicate during the Dark Hour. And obviously cell phones were out of the question.”

 

“Right.”

 

“It just doesn’t make sense for there to be a Shadow outside of Tartarus, though. Not right now, at least.”

 

With that, they picked up the pace. And when they arrived at the Shrine, it was a sight to behold. A small Shiba Inu attacking and defeating a Shadow. But then the dog collapsed on the spot. They rushed over to him, kneeling down beside him.

 

“Koro-chan…” Kirika said. She knelt beside him, gently pulling him onto her lap. “He’s hurt.”

 

“I can’t believe he managed to fight off a shadow all on his own,” Akihiko said. He pulled the device back out of his pocket to transmit. “I’m here,” he said once it went through. “Sorry, but I think you guys better come right away.”

 

“What’s wrong?” Mitsuru said. “Is it a powerful one?”

 

“No, the Shadow’s been defeated. In fact, it was already defeated when we got here.”

 

“What happened?”

 

“The little fella’s been injured. We wanna save him if we can. So, get here as soon as you can.” With that, he returned the device to his pocket again. He then thought for a quick moment. “You need to heal him. Here.” This time he pulled out a gun-like object. “You can use my Evoker.”

 

“I’m sorry, but I—I can’t. I say Idun has healing abilities, but I-I don’t know the extent of them. I honestly don’t know exactly what she’s capable of.”

 

“Let’s find out, then.”

 

She took a deep breath before taking the Evoker from him. She put it to her head, closing her eyes and pulling the trigger. She felt Idun emerge, so she reopened her eyes. “Idun,” she said. There was a glowing light. “P-protect him.” And that was all it took to shift the light from surrounding her to surrounding the dog. “Whoa…”

 

He smiled. “I think you got it.”

 

She watched with awe as the dog in her lap seemed to relax. “I never knew it could be that simple.”

 

Akihiko placed a hand on her shoulder, causing another jolt of electricity just like that time before. “Good job, Kirika.”

 

She kept her head down as she blushed in return. They then fell silent as they waited for the others to arrive, keeping a close eye on Koromaru. Comforting him. Despite having summoned Idun, the pool of blood around the dog still seemed to be growing. Maybe she wasn’t as great of a healer as she once believed. Maybe she could only slow down injuries. Numb the pain. Or maybe she just hadn’t discovered her abilities’ full potential quite yet.

 

Finally, the rest of the group appeared in the not-so-far-off distance. When they did, Idun vanished.

 

“What happened?” Akihiko said.

 

“I think she’s like me and doesn’t enjoy being around other people.”

 

“Well, that’s okay. You were still a big help.”

 

“Koro-chan,” Fuuka said once they reached them. “Are you okay, Koro-chan?”

 

“You know this dog?” Mitsuru said.

 

“Yeah, everyone around here does,” Yukari said. “We have to help him.”

 

Mitsuru nodded. “First, we must stop the bleeding.”

 

“I was able to slow it down,” Kirika spoke up, “but I couldn’t quite stop it.”

 

“Man, he’s one tough fighter,” Akihiko went on. He shook his head. “He defeated the shadow all by himself.”

 

“Wait, does that mean…?” Junpei’s eyes widened. “This dog’s a Persona-user?”

 

“He says, ‘this is a place of peace, so I protected it,’” Aigis spoke up. She gestured to the flowers leaning next to the gate.

 

“Those flowers…” Fuuka said. “They must be for the priest who died in the accident.”

 

“So he really was guarding this place,” Yukari said.

 

“Uh, Aigis?” Junpei said. “Don’t tell me you can translate dog language, too.”

 

“Canines do not have their own language,” Aigis said. “However, speech is not the only means of communication.”

 

“This fella really is a rare breed,” Akihiko said.

 

“Confirmed,” Aigis said.

 

“He’s not the only one,” Junpei said.

 

“Okay, this conversation is great and all,” Kirika then started, “but it’s not helping. He’s still bleeding. So if we could, y’know, get him help, that’d be even better.”

 

“All right, let’s report to the Chairman so we can conclude this mission,” Mitsuru said. “As for a vet… It may be midnight, but I believe I can arrange for one.”

 

Yukari smiled. “Good job, boy. You’re one amazing dog.”


	43. July 30th, 2009

Exhausted, Kirika spent most of the next day in bed. The Dark Hour somehow always managed to drain her of all energy. She was sure it had the same effect on the others, but there was still something bothersome about it.

 

Around six o’clock that evening, though, there was a knock on her door.

 

“Come in,” she said.

 

Akihiko was the one on the other side, but he remained standing in the doorway. “Hey, I just wanted to thank you for last night.”

 

“Thank me? Why?”

 

“For not doubting your abilities.”

 

“Oh.” She cleared her throat. “Yeah, well—”

 

“Also, I realised I haven’t fully explained everything to you yet.”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“Well, first of all, Tartarus is the Shadow’s nest. It’s like a labyrinth and it has multiple floors,” he said.

 

“Yeah, you can tell just by looking at it.”

 

“The outside is nothing compared to the inside.”

 

“I’ll take your word for it.”

 

“Second of all, since April there have been giant Shadows that escape Tartarus during the full moons. A couple times there have even been two.”

 

“Giant Shadows like the one I saved your ass from? That’s a monthly occurrence?”

 

“Yeah, it is. And there are twelve Shadows in total. Once we defeat them all, Tartarus will disappear and the Dark Hour will come to a permanent end. The next full moon will be the sixth Shadow, so we’re just about halfway through.”

 

“Huh. That’s pretty intense.” She paused. “Y’know, I’ve noticed there’s a pattern with Apathy Syndrome, too. The Lost increase right before a full moon and decrease right after.”

 

“Yeah, I remember you mentioning that before. But it is a definite pattern.”

 

“And the other thing is definite, too?”

 

“You mean about ending the Dark Hour?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“Well…hmm.” He shrugged his shoulders. “It’s what we’re fighting for.”

 

She nodded. “I see.”

 

“As far as we’re concerned, it’s definite. I mean, the head researcher from the experiment ten years ago left behind a video log explaining—”

 

“Whoa, wait, what experiment?”

 

“The experiment that caused the Dark Hour,” he said. “It was actually conducted by the Kirijo Group, which is why Mitsuru formed SEES.”

 

“I don’t really understand…”

 

“Yeah, it’s long and complicated, and we only just found all of this out right after I asked you to join.”

 

“When the group went away for those few days?”

 

“Exactly.”

 

“Well, I’m sure I’ll be able to piece it together on my own.”

 

“If not, you can ask me anything. I’d be more than willing to help you understand.”

 

She smiled a little sheepishly. “Thanks.”

 

“By the way, the Chairman will be at the dorm tomorrow. It’ll be good for you to finally be able to meet him.”

 

“How long after I meet him will I be able to get my own Evoker?”

 

“Hopefully it won’t take too long. But the Chairman has to also confirm that it’s okay for you to join the group.”

 

“Do you think he will?”

 

“In all honestly, I’ll file a complaint if he doesn’t. I mean, he’s debating allowing Amada to join the group and he’s just in elementary school.”

 

“That kid is a Persona-user?”

 

“Well, he has the Potential, yes.” He sighed. “I mean, of course he would…”

 

“Huh? What’s that supposed to mean?”

 

“Nothing, just—just something that happened a couple years back.”

 

“What happened?”

 

Now he shook his head. “It’s not a big deal.”

 

“Not a big deal? Really?”

 

“Really.”

 

She raised an eyebrow at him, looking him up and down. Then she turned her head away. “All right, if you say so.” She thought for a moment. “We all seem to be big on keeping secrets around here. And in the past.”

 

“Yeah, I guess…” He cleared his throat. “I’m gonna head back down to the lounge now. You coming?”

 

“Hmm? Sure, I’ll be right down.”

 

With that, Akihiko left, closing the door behind him. Kirika forced herself out of the bed and walked over to the door. She stopped once her hand was on the knob.

 

“Secrets in the past,” she said under her breath. She mused for a moment. “Secrets for the future.” She sighed, shaking her head. “I need to expose my own secrets before someone else exposes them for me.”


	44. July 31st, 2009

Another restless night. Once the Dark Hour ended, Kirika woke up pretty much every hour on the dot. And she always had a difficult time falling back asleep afterwards, too. Eventually, she didn’t even bother trying to fall back asleep. And before she knew it, it was eight o’clock in the morning and there was a knock at her door. She stumbled over to it and opened it.

 

“Good morning,” Akihiko greeted her.

 

“Not when you haven’t slept,” she said. “Ugh.” She rubbed at her eyes with the heels of her palms. “I’m seriously wiped out.”

 

“Why didn’t you sleep?”

 

“I couldn’t. I just kept waking up.” She shook her head, trying to make herself just a bit more alert. “Don’t you have school?”

 

He laughed. “It’s summer break.”

 

“Shit, that’s right. Almost forgot.”

 

“No worries.” He paused. “C’mon, the Chairman is downstairs.”

 

“What? He’s here already? I figured he’d come in the afternoon or the evening or—” she yawned, “—tomorrow.”

 

“Nope. He decided to come bright and early.”

 

“Great…”

 

She quickly got ready for the day ahead—it never took much for her—and the two of them headed downstairs together. The only other people present were Mitsuru and Aigis. And, of course—

 

She froze when she saw the Chairman. _Is that—? Yeah, it’s gotta be. No doubt_. It was the same man she had done the tarot reading for earlier in the month. Before she got shot. The one who had had the most negative reading she’d ever done. The one Idun told her to run from.

 

Idun was still telling her to run.

 

“Good morning,” the man greeted them. “I hope Akihiko didn’t wake you.”

 

“U-uhm…” Kirika shook her head. _Snap out of it_. If he could act like he didn’t remember her, then she could do the same. “I almost wish he had,” she said. “Then that would’ve implied I had actually slept some last night.”

 

He laughed. “My name is Shuji Ikutsuki.”

 

She swallowed hard. Like hell she wanted this man knowing her name, but how was she supposed to explain that to the others? She had known them all for only a week. It wasn’t her place to accuse their chairman of—Of what, exactly? Negativity? Hell, she had no sort of evidence. Nothing to go on. A single bad reading wasn’t enough to accuse someone of—Damn it, of _what_? What was it about this man that Idun wanted Kirika to be wary of? To run from? What could he be capable of? What—?

 

“Miss?” he spoke up, breaking her out of her thoughts.

 

She shook her head. “Oh. Sorry. Lost myself there, for a moment.” She cleared her throat. “Kirika Nishioka.”

 

“Well, it’s nice to finally meet you.”

 

There was a certain gleam in his eyes. There was no denying he remembered her. And it took everything in her to force a smile. “Likewise.”

 

“I’ve heard a bit about you by this point, and I think you’ll make an excellent addition to the group.”

 

“Yeah? That’s all it takes. A few good words from Kirijo and I’m in?”

 

“Akihiko is really the one who spoke of you,” Mitsuru said. “I only went over the meeting we had as a group with him and informed him of how we made our final decision that day.”

 

“Either way, you are more than welcome here,” Ikutsuki went on. “I should be able to have an Evoker made for you before the next full moon.”

 

“Thank you, sir,” Kirika said. “I appreciate it.”

 

He smiled. There was almost something sinister about it. Something that made her more than uneasy. “You know, I’m very intrigued to see your abilities in action. It’s almost _safe_ to say I’m _dangerously_ impatient.”

 

Now she blinked a few times. That comment threw Idun off guard. “E-excuse me?”

 

“He was making a pun based on your Persona and your abilities to summon her when you feel like you are in danger,” Aigis spoke up.

 

“Yes, making jokes is just a…quirk of the Chairman’s,” Mitsuru said.

 

“They’re clever,” Ikutsuki said.

 

Kirika nodded, still somewhat taken aback by the so-called joke. “Right. Well…I think I’m gonna head on over to the mall for a much-needed cup of coffee.”

 

“I’ll join you,” Akihiko said.

 

So, the two of them left the dorm and headed for Iwatodai Station.

 

“That was…kinda rude,” she said.

 

“What was?”

 

“That stupid pun.”

 

“Oh, that’s just how Ikutsuki-san is. You’ll learn to ignore them over time.”

 

“I just don’t think safety is something to joke about.”

 

“He didn’t mean any harm by it.”

 

She narrowed her eyes. “Was that supposed to be—?”

 

He laughed. “No, that was completely unintentional.”

 

Now she shook her head. “Anyhow, guess it just rubbed me the wrong way.”

 

“Hmm. Well, he’s not around too often, so—”

 

“It’s fine. Like you said, I’ll learn to ignore them.” She smiled. “No _harm_ done.”

 

He looked at her, unamused. “Oh, I get it. So, it’s okay when you make jokes, but no one else can?”

 

She shrugged her shoulders. “Exactly.”

 

He chuckled again. “Of course.”

 

They soon hopped on the tram, making their way to Port Island Station. From there, they headed to Paulownia Mall. Neither of them said much, but that didn’t make it awkward; it was still overall comfortable. Kirika was comfortable with Akihiko. Hell, she couldn’t remember the last time she had felt comfortable with anyone except herself. She couldn’t remember the last time she had felt safe in someone else’s presence. And she did feel safe. Idun could disappear right then and there, but she would still feel safe.

 

That realisation was what made her uncomfortable.


	45. August 3rd, 2009

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another month over!! Now getting into the fourth month...man, time flies, haha I think some of the chapters start getting a bit longer now that we're getting deeper into the story and whatnot. I dunno, I barely remember my own stories half the time lmao

Nothing out of the ordinary happened over the course of the next few days. Kirika spent her time either alone or she went out with Akihiko. But she tried to spend it alone more often than not. Akihiko was so stubborn, though, that it was sometimes hard to get him to let her be. Not that she minded having his company, but after she had made that little realisation…

 

Kirika didn’t do friendships or relationships. She didn’t allow herself to grow attached to people. And she had to keep reminding herself of that rule. A rule that, as of late, was becoming more and more difficult to follow.

 

After being out on her own for a morning of readings, she returned to the dorm late in the afternoon. Everyone was sitting in the lounge, doing their own thing.

 

“Welcome back,” Mitsuru greeted her. “I have something for you.”

 

“For me?” Kirika said.

 

“Yes. Come with me.”

 

She stood up and the two of them headed to the fourth floor of the dorm. They entered the Command Room and Mitsuru pulled out a briefcase.

 

“What’s this?” Kirika said.

 

“Open it and find out. I think you’ll like it.”

 

She couldn’t help but smile at the anticipation. She set the briefcase down and snapped it open. Insider was a revolver. It was compact in size and the sides were engraved with a saying—

 

“Memento vivere,” Kirika read.

 

“Remember to live,” Mitsuru said.

 

She smiled again. “It’s perfect. Thank you.”

 

She smiled back. It was a small smile. “You’re very welcome. And since you have your Evoker now and the next full moon is only in three days, I would like for us all to go to Tartarus tonight. You need at least a little practice with using it.”

 

“Well, I’ve used Sanada’s before.”

 

“Constant practice.”

 

“Right. Sounds good.”

 

They headed back down to the lounge and rejoined the others.

 

“We will be going to Tartarus tonight,” Mitsuru announced. “Nishioka needs at least one night to get used to her Evoker.”

 

“Oh, you got it?” Akihiko said. “Then we’ll definitely get to Tartarus tonight. That’ll give us a couple days to recuperate before the full moon, too.”

 

“So, everyone is available tonight, correct?”

 

The others all said they would be able to go.

 

“Wait, do you guys ever go…not as a group?” Kirika said.

 

“Sometimes,” Junpei said.

 

“We can’t go if Fuuka is unavailable,” Yukari said.

 

“But we really can’t go if our Senpai aren’t able to,” Fuuka said.

 

“I’m assuming Kirijo leads the operations,” Kirika then said.

 

“As a matter of fact, no,” Mitsuru denied.

 

She raised an eyebrow. “Sanada?”

 

Akihiko shook his head. “Minato is the group’s leader. His ability goes beyond anything any of us can do.”

 

“Is that so?”

 

“I can change my Persona mid-battle.” Minato seemed nonchalant about the fact.

 

Her eyes widened now. “Oh. Wow.”

 

“Exactly,” Akihiko said with a chuckle. “Plus, he had no issue summoning his Persona when he needed to.”

 

“Yeah, about that…” She paused, figuring out how to word what it was she wanted to ask. “How come you all need to shoot yourselves in the head to summon your Personas? Like, why is it that violent?”

 

“Summoning our Personas means accepting that fact that we are mortal,” Aigis said.

 

“So, in a way, it’s like…welcoming death?”

 

“You could put it like that,” Mitsuru said.

 

“You’ll be fine,” Akihiko said. “You’ve already used mine twice. Plus, once you’re in the heat of battle, it won’t even cross your mind that that’s the process. It’ll be second nature. Instinct.”

 

“No pressure, though,” Fuuka spoke up.

 

“Keep in mind that some of us do have healing abilities, as well,” Yukari started, “so it’s not like you’re our only means of protection if something does go wrong.”

 

“Not that anything will,” Akihiko said.

 

Kirika nodded. “Right.”

 

“You okay?” Junpei said.

 

“I’m fine. Perfect, actually.” She paused. “I’m gonna rest some before we go tonight. So just come and get me once we’re ready to leave.”

 

With that, she retired to her room. She placed the Evoker on the desk and sat down on the bed. For a while, she just stared at it. All of a sudden, she was no longer sure if she was ready for this. She wasn’t sure if she wanted to take part in this. She’d always been better off on her own. Now she had seven other people relying on her—and an ability _she_ didn’t even fully understand yet—when she used to only ever rely on herself.

 

What if she couldn’t help these people in the end? What if she turned out to be completely useless? What if her abilities fell through? Or what if the Shadows were too strong for her to counter?

 

Then Idun reminded her of that fateful night. The night she awakened. The night Kirika left the city. The person—the stranger—yelling at her. Following her. And the creatures chasing them… She hadn’t fought them off, but she had been able to shield herself from them. Then she was able to escape while those creatures feasted—

 

She could still hear the stranger’s screams echoing in her mind.

 

She let out a heavy sigh and lay back on the bed. She pursed her lips, the engraved words on the Evoker trying to pass through them. She closed her eyes, and her voice was soft as she spoke, “Memento vivere.”

 

There was a knock on her door. She shot up like a bolt of lightning, her breathing coming fast and short. She looked around to see how dark it was. Had she fallen asleep? It felt as if no time had passed at all.

 

“Kirika?” Akihiko said through the door.

 

She got up and opened it. “Sorry, just a little dazed.”

 

“Everything okay?”

 

“Yeah, just fell asleep, but I don’t actually feel like I slept.” She shook her head. “It’s no big deal. Let’s just get going.” She headed into the hallway.

 

“I think you might be forgetting something,” he said, holding the door open.

 

“Shit.” She returned to the room and grabbed her Evoker. “Thanks.”

 

“Are you sure you’re okay? We can postpone this one more day if you think you might need a little more time to prepare yourself.”

 

“I’m fine.”

 

“Hmm. You say that a lot.”

 

“I know.”

 

And that was the end of it. They headed downstairs and met with the others at the front door.

 

“Ready?” Mitsuru said.

 

“As I’ll ever be,” Kirika said.

 

The group then left and made their way for the school. Except they headed in the opposite direction of Iwatodai Station.

 

“Hold up, we’re not taking the tram?” Kirika said.

 

“No,” Junpei said. “We’ll risk getting stuck on it during the Dark Hour.”

 

“So that would leave…”

 

“The bridge,” Minato said.

 

“By the time we reach it, the Dark Hour will have begun so we won’t have to worry about any traffic,” Fuuka went on.

 

“Right.” Kirika swallowed hard. “Let’s go, then.”

 

And so they headed for the Moonlight Bridge. The group spoke softly with one another. Idle chatter. Kirika stayed towards the back and out of the conversations. And as they neared the bridge, the Dark Hour started. That was when she slowed her pace, falling even more behind. Akihiko noticed this and slowed down with her.

 

“Everything okay?”

 

“I hate this bridge.”

 

“Fear of heights?”

 

“No, no, I’m okay with bridges in general. It’s just this particular bridge that I hate.”

 

“Why’s that?”

 

“Not sure, actually. I guess I should say that Idun hates it. Gives her a bad vibe.”

 

“Hmm.”

 

She shook her head. “Never mind. It’s fine. It’s not the first time I’ve been forced to cross it, and I’m sure it won’t be the last.”

 

“Senpai, hurry up,” Junpei suddenly said. He and the others were waiting for them at the base of the bridge. “How’d you two even fall so far behind?”

 

“You can do this,” Akihiko said.

 

“Oh, I know I can. I just don’t want to.”

 

He continued to smile. “C’mon.”

 

He sped up the pace a little and she followed suit. The others started to make their way across. But Akihiko never got too far ahead of Kirika. Better yet, he kept on talking about anything and everything. So, she listened to him. Focused on the sound of his voice. The most comforting sound she’d ever heard. There was just something so…relieving about it. Soothing. Hearing him reassured her of his presence. And his presence made her feel secure.

 

Shit. He wasn’t much of a stranger anymore, was he?

 

Next thing she knew, they were on the other side of the bridge.

 

“See?” Akihiko said. “That wasn’t so difficult, right?”

 

“Yeah, except I’m gonna have to do it again at some point,” she said.

 

He chuckled. “And you’ll get used it.”

 

“Yeah, yeah…”

 

They then caught up with the others and finally arrived at Tartarus. They entered it, and Kirika was presented with a narrow hallway. She followed the others down it until they reached the base floor. Before them was a stairwell that led to a door that seemed to lead to nowhere.

 

“Whoa,” she said.

 

“Pretty cool, huh?” Junpei said.

 

“It’d be cooler if all this no longer existed.”

 

“Select your group, Arisato,” Mitsuru then spoke up.

 

“You, Sanada-san, and Aigis,” Minato said.

 

“Very well. Here’s what we’ll be doing this time.” She faced everyone. “Keep the healing to a minimum. Nishioka, you’ll be conversing with Yamagishi to keep track of how we’re all doing while in battle. She’s our scanner, which means she can detect Shadows, as well as other presences, and keep track of their strengths and weakness and the like. She can also keep track of how we’re doing as a group. So, if any of us face any issues, Yamagishi will send you in to us and you’ll take over from there and do whatever you need to do. Once you protect who you need to, Yamagishi will bring you back here to the main entrance. Think you two can manage that?”

 

“That shouldn’t be a problem at all,” Fuuka said.

 

“Yeah, sounds like a plan,” Kirika said. “So, Yamagishi, can you figure out a Shadow’s weakness beforehand?”

 

“Unfortunately, no, my abilities aren’t that perfected. I can only analyse them once one of our teammates lands a successful critical attack.”

 

“Oh.” She shrugged her shoulders. “Still useful.”

 

“Yes, but Mitsuru-san has the same ability, plus she can fight.”

 

“Don’t belittle yourself, Yamagishi,” Mitsuru said. “Your abilities extend far past what I could do.”

 

“Well, let’s do this,” Akihiko then spoke up.

 

“Yes, let us go,” Aigis said.

 

He smirked eagerly. “The thought of practically putting it all on the line tonight has me pumped.”

 

“Akihiko,” Mitsuru said.

 

“What?”

 

She only shook her head at him before turning back on Kirika. “If you at any instance doubt your ability and feel like you won’t be able to provide protection—”

 

“Don’t worry, I can do this,” she said. “Just trust me.”

 

“We do,” Akihiko said.

 

With that, the four of them headed up to the umpteenth floor of Tartarus. Kirika wasn’t sure how far up they were, but she knew she’d be able to reach them. No way in hell she was gonna let any of them down.


	46. August 6th, 2009

Everything went smoothly that Dark Hour; Kirika was able to help on the few instances she was needed. And the Evoker really did make summoning Idun a hell of a lot easier. She never realised she could emerge so effortlessly and without any sort of persuasion. It made her feel a lot more confident in her abilities.

 

The group took the next couple of days to relax before the full moon. Plus, they were all escaping from the summer heat by staying indoors. Except for Akihiko, of course. Kirika still caught him leaving to go out for runs. She shook her head at him, still unable to fully understand his obsession with training. Then again, she was sure he had a better reason other than _to get stronger_.

 

Before she knew it, it was the day of the full moon. Once again, the group took it easy that day. Kirika spent it locked away in her room. Just before the Dark Hour began, she headed up to the fourth floor to join the others in the Command Room.

 

“Yo, I was just about to go get you,” Akihiko greeted her.

 

“No need,” she said.

 

The atmosphere shifted. Fuuka summoned her Persona. Everyone waited.

 

“Well, it’s a full moon once again,” the Chairman broke the silence.

 

“Any luck, Yamagishi?”  Mitsuru said.

 

“Yes, I’ve located it,” Fuuka said. “And this time, it’s not just an ordinary one.”

 

Akihiko smirked. “Now that’s more like it.”

 

“It’s by the deserted houses in the northern part of Iwatodai,” Fuuka went on. This caught Kirika’s attention more than anything else so far. “But there is one thing that’s strange.” She paused. “It seems like it’s underground…almost ten meters.”

 

“It must be in some kind of basement,” Yukari said.

 

“According to my records, there is no structure in the area that matches that criteria,” Aigis said. “However, in the past there was an underground facility that was used by the military.”

 

“The military?” Yukari said. “Is that true?”

 

“Well, the architectural and geographic data for the area were uploaded into her memory bank,” the Chairman said. He thought for a moment. “Then again, the information hasn’t been updated in a decade.”

 

“That is correct,” Aigis said.

 

Junpei’s eyes widened a bit. “Uh, wouldn’t that be a good idea?”

 

“Not the main concern right now, Iori,” Kirika spoke up.

 

“Right,” Akihiko said. “So how should we interpret this?”

 

Fuuka shook her head. “There’s no way of knowing without actually going there.”

 

“It seems war’s scars may be deeper than we think,” Mitsuru said. “The situation is still unclear at this time. Therefore, we will wait until we arrive to determine who should be deployed.”

 

“Agreed,” Akihiko said.

 

“Understood,” Aigis said.

 

“Then let’s go,” Mitsuru said.

 

Kirika took a deep, shaky breath and glanced over at Akihiko. He looked back and gave her a reassuring smile, to which she forced a smile in return. This time, though, it wasn’t enough to cure her concerns.

 

The group left the dorm. In a few short, quiet minutes, they arrived at the northern harbor of Iwatodai. Kirika looked around for any sign of Shinjiro, though she seriously doubted he’d be wandering about at this hour.

 

Soon enough, they passed through a large gate, granting themselves entrance to the old underground facility.

 

“The target should be around here,” Fuuka spoke up.

 

“Well done,” a male voice then said. Kirika knew that voice; she knew it a little too well. They turned to face the two people who were standing just outside the gate. “This is the first time we’ve met in person,” the shirtless young man said.

 

Fuuka’s eyes were wide now, her gaze set on the strangers. “Who are these guys? Lucia didn’t sense a thing till now.”

 

“My name is Takaya,” the shirtless young man said. “This is Jin.” He gestured to the one wearing glasses. “We are known to some as Strega. We’ve been keeping an eye on you.” He paused. “From what we hear, you’ve undertaken a _righteous_ battle to save the world. But we’ve come here tonight to put an end to that dream. You’ve gained new allies, yet this land still crawls with sin. Tartarus is towering beautifully as always…”

 

“But why the hell would you wanna stop us?” Junpei said.

 

“Simple,” Jin said. “If the Shadows and the Dark Hour disappear, then so will our power. And we can’t let that happen, now, can we?”

 

“Power?” Mitsuru said. “Don’t tell me you’re Persona-users as well.”

 

“Why don’t you use that pretty little head of yours for a change?” Takaya said. “Only a select few wield the power of Persona. And the Dark Hour is a frontier that is ours alone to explore…just like the Tower of Demise.”

 

“That’s your reason?” Yukari said. “Are you crazy? There’s no telling what will happen if we don’t do something about the Shadows.”

 

“What difference does it make? There will always be disasters, whether they are caused by Shadows or arise from human folly. No one can predict the future anyway. But that is all beside the point. Surely, you will acknowledge the sense of significance the Dark Hour has given you.”

 

“You think I like this?”

 

“Is it not so? How about the rest of you?” He turned to the others. “Do you also wish to return to your pathetic, ordinary lives?”

 

“Huh?” Junpei said.

 

Kirika looked around the group, her eyes landing on Akihiko last. He turned his gaze downward, not speaking up.

 

“I don’t enjoy this one single bit,” Fuuka went on.

 

It was against Kirika’s better judgement to make her presence known to these two, but she felt the need—Idun felt the need—to at least say something. “I’d be more than glad to be rid of my abilities,” she spoke up.

 

Takaya narrowed his eyes. “You?” He looked her up and down. “Huh. Shouldn’t you be dead?”

 

“Unfortunately for you, that shot didn’t do much damage.” She shrugged her shoulders. “It was an easy enough fix.”

 

“Well, if you hadn’t moved and disrupted my aim, that shot would’ve landed higher. I won’t make the same mistake next time.”

 

She pursed her lips, rolling her eyes. “What’s your damn point anyway?”

 

“You’ve each got your own reason for fighting,” Jin said. “ _Justice_ is only an excuse. And that makes you all hypocrites. So, I say, to hell with you.” He and Takaya passed back through the gates. Jin kicked a switch once they were on the other side. “Have fun in there.”

 

The gate began to close. Kirika and Akihiko rushed up to it, but to no avail. By the time they reached it, it was too late.

 

“Damn it,” Akihiko said.

 

“We will be all right,” Aigis spoke up. “Rather than wasting our energy, I suggest we deal with the Shadow first.”

 

“You’re right,” Yukari said. “If we lose our cool, then they win.”

 

“The shadow’s moving,” Fuuka said. “I think it’s noticed us.”

 

“All right, let’s concentrate on our original goal,” Mitsuru said. “We can look for a way out after we’ve won. Everyone, prepare for battle.”

 

So, Minato chose his team and they headed deeper underground. Kirika remained by Fuuka’s side, listening closely to her analyses. Her hand remained on her Evoker at all times, just to be safe. She wanted to be prepared for anything and everything. Luckily, though, the small team managed to take down the Shadow without too much of an issue. Once they returned, Mitsuru contacted the Command Room.

 

“Yes?” the Chairman said over the transceiver.

 

“This is Mitsuru,” she said. “We’ve neutralised the target.”

 

“Good work. You may return.”

 

“Wait, there’s more.” She paused. “Our mission was interrupted by an uninvited guest. He’s most likely a Persona-user.”

 

“A Persona-user?”

 

“And he wasn’t alone,” she went on. “They appeared quietly during the Dark Hour and seemed to be aware of our activities.”

 

“Hmm… Did they say anything that might give us a clue?”

 

“Come to think of it, they said they’re called Strega.”

 

“Strega?” He paused. “I’ll see what I can find out.”

 

“Thank you. I have one final thing to report.” Another pause. “I regret to inform you that we fell right into Strega’s trap, and now we’re locked inside here.”

 

“Ah, I see.” He paused. “Since the threat has been eliminated, I’ll send someone over as soon as I can.”

 

“I’m sorry. We’ll be waiting.”

 

And that was the end of it.

 

“Now that the Shadow’s been defeated, and we can think about other things…” Akihiko started before turning on Kirika. “What was that exchange Strega had with you?”

 

Kirika froze. She was foolish to have hoped no one would bring that up. “What do you mean?”

 

“When they questioned why you were still alive and you mentioned how you had been shot.”

 

“Oh…that one…”

 

“Yeah, that one.”

 

“Well…” She let out a heavy sigh. “They may have been the ones who shot me.”

 

Mitsuru’s eyes widened. “They shot you?”

 

“Hey, it’s not a big deal, right? I mean, they didn’t successfully kill me, so—”

 

“Why did they try killing you in the first place?” Akihiko said.

 

“It was the last full moon,” Kirika said. “I caught them spying on you guys at that hotel—At least, y’know, I assume now that it was you guys they were watching.” She shook her head. “Either way, I may have overheard some things…”

 

“Accidentally, or were you eavesdropping?”

 

“What difference does it make?”

 

“Great, now they’re gonna be even more pissed at us since one of their victims survived and is now fighting with us,” Junpei said.

 

“Glad that’s your main concern.” She rolled her eyes. “For the record, I had no idea who they actually were when they shot me if that’s what you’re wondering about.”

 

“Was that your only encounter with them?” Akihiko went on.

 

“That they know of.” She shrugged her shoulders. “I’ve seen them around the city a few other times.”

 

“I don’t think we should be discussing this right now, Senpai,” Yukari spoke up.

 

Fuuka nodded. “I agree.”

 

“Fine,” Akihiko said.

 

Kirika swallowed hard. “Thanks.”

 

She turned away from the group and let out a shaky breath. She placed her hand over the scarring wound on her lower left abdomen. She was half tempted to bring up Shinjiro, but decided against it. That wouldn’t be very fair to him, after all. So, she let it go. Besides, that wasn’t any of her business. Her business was the group.

 

The group. As in other people. For the first time in her life, her main concern wasn’t her own damned self.


	47. August 8th, 2009

Kirika spent the day after the mission alone in her room again. She received a knock on her door a few different times, but ignored them each time.

 

The day after that, she decided to come out. She headed down to the lounge to see it just about empty. Akihiko, Mitsuru, Aigis, and the kid were the only ones around.

 

“Why don’t any of you ever go out?” she announced her presence.

 

“I go out,” Akihiko said.

 

“For reasons other than training?”

 

“Yeah. To make sure you get food. By the way, I know for a fact you haven’t eaten in two days.”

 

“Tch. What about you, Kirijo?”

 

“I prefer staying in with a good book,” she said.

 

“Amada?”

 

“It’s a little too hot for me out there, to be honest,” Ken said.

 

Kirika paused. “Aigis?” She shook her head. “Never mind, that’s self-explanatory.” She sat down beside Akihiko, grabbing a magazine.

 

“You stay in your room more often than not, as well,” Mitsuru said.

 

“She has a point,” Aigis said. “Why do you not go out?”

 

“I have my reasons,” Kirika said, keeping her eyes on the article in front of her.

 

“Well,” Akihiko rose to his feet, “you’re going out now.”

 

“Is that so?”

 

“You need to eat something.”

 

“I ain’t hungry.”

 

“How can you not be hungry after two days of not eating?”

 

She shrugged her shoulders, flipping the page. “When you grow up on the streets, you get used to not eating for extended periods of time. Not every kid gets the luxury of an orphanage.”

 

“Luxury? Hah. They’re not luxuries. Trust me on that.”

 

She looked over at him. “Still more luxurious than the streets.”

 

He looked back at her. “Guess so.”

 

Mitsuru looked back and forth between the two of them. “I honestly can’t decide if you two get along or not.”

 

“Maybe it’s the opposite,” Ken said.

 

Akihiko raised an eyebrow. “The opposite?”

 

“Maybe they get along in a different way.”

 

“Amada,” Mitsuru said.

 

Kirika pursed her lips, holding back a blush. “Respect your Senpai, kiddo.”

 

Ken looked down. “Sorry, Nishioka-san.”

 

She chuckled, shaking her head. “We know how to be civil with one another,” she then said. “Let’s leave it at that.”

 

“Civil or not,” Akihiko said, turning his attention back on her, “you still need to eat. So, let’s go.”

 

“I’m really not hungry.”

 

“Either we go out to Hagakure or wherever, or I’m force feeding you one of my protein shakes.”

 

That caused Kirika to jump to her feet. “On second thought, a beef bowl sounds pretty damn good right about now.”

 

“Yeah, that’s what I thought.”

 

So, the two of them headed out. Most of the time was spent in silence. There were a few different points when Akihiko looked as if he was getting ready to say something, but never did. Kirika let it go rather than pursuing it. After all, she didn’t have much to say, either.

 

Once they returned to the dorm, only the kid was left in the lounge.

 

“Hello,” he greeted them. “Kirijo-san is up on the fourth floor. She told me to let you two know as soon as you returned.”

 

“Is something going on?” Kirika said to Akihiko.

 

“Hope not,” Akihiko said.

 

With that, they headed up to the fourth floor. When they entered the Command Room, they were greeted with barking.

 

“Koro-chan,” Kirika said with a smile. She knelt beside the Shiba Inu. “I’m so glad you’re okay.”

 

Akihiko sat down by them. “Hey, fella,” he said, patting his head.

 

Koromaru sat there, wagging his tail at the attention.

 

“The rest of the group should be arriving shortly,” Mitsuru spoke up.

 

A couple minutes later, Aigis and Junpei entered.

 

“Does this mean we have a new mission?” Aigis said.

 

“I dunno,” Junpei said. “But the alarm’s not ringing…”

 

Yukari, Fuuka, and Minato then entered.

 

“Huh?” Yukari said.

 

“Koro-chan,” Fuuka said.

 

Kirika moved out of the way, allowing the others a chance to surround the Shiba Inu. He barked happily at them all.

 

“Are you okay?” Fuuka went on. “Where’d you get this collar?”

 

“The collar is designed to help control his Persona,” Mitsuru said. “In other words, it’s an Evoker for dogs.”

 

“Wait, does that mean he’ll be going into battle?” Yukari said.

 

“It was a surprise for me as well. But according to the tests, it’s quite possible. In fact, it was the Chairman’s suggestion. We’ll be looking after him here in the dorm.”

 

Kirika furrowed her brow. “Are we sure that’s a good idea?”

 

“I don’t see why not.”

 

“Is that okay with you, Koro-chan?” Fuuka then said, to which Koromaru responded with a short bark.

 

“He says, ‘I’ll return the favor,’” Aigis said.

 

“Man, you’re one loyal dog,” Yukari said, and this warranted another bark.

 

“Hey, make yourself at home,” Junpei said. “The more the merrier, right? Who cares if you’re a dog? All right, I’ll take him for a walk. It’s summer break, after all.”

 

“Yes, it is,” Mitsuru said. “Enjoy your vacation while you can; summer classes start next week. I’ll see to it that you graduate.”

 

Now Junpei looked a little freaked out. “H-hey…good one, Senpai. You almost had me there.”

 

“Oh, it’s no joke. We’ll be taking intensive courses. I’ve already applied for all of us. I know how difficult it’s been balancing school and our late night excursions. You haven’t had much time to study. I apologise for that. That’s why the Chairman agrees that this is a good idea.” She paused. “I thought I told Takeba and Yamagishi.”

 

“Are you serious? This is the first I’ve heard of it.”

 

“Uhm, sorry,” Fuuka said. “I forgot to mention it.”

 

“Awe, man…”

 

“Hey, with your grades, you should be thanking her,” Yukari said.

 

“Yeah, right.” He sighed. “This sucks. Don’t you think?”

 

Minato only shrugged. “Whatever.”

 

Kirika laughed. “You’re a man of many words.”

 

“W-well, it’s only for a few weeks,” Fuuka then said. “So, let’s make the most of it.”

 

Soon enough, the group dispersed, and it was just Kirika, Akihiko, and Mitsuru left in the Command Room.

 

“I wasn’t signed up for these classes, right?” Kirika spoke up.

 

Mitsuru smiled. “Of course not. Since you’re not a student, I wasn’t able to add you to the courses.”

 

“You actually tried, didn’t you?”

 

“It was Akihiko’s suggestion.”

 

She raised an eyebrow at him. “Excuse me?”

 

“I thought it might be a good idea,” Akihiko said. “I recalled you mentioning how you’ve never been to a real school, so I figured what the hell.”

 

Kirika shook her head. “No. Never try to pull that stunt with me. Schools are full of too many people that I don’t feel like dealing with.”

 

He chuckled a bit. “Fine.”

 

“Well, we should all try to get to bed now, as well,” Mitsuru then said.

 

So, the three of them headed downstairs. Akihiko bid the girls goodnight and continued down to the second floor.

 

“One moment, Nishioka,” Mitsuru said before she could escape to her room. “How have you adjusted to life here at the dorm?”

 

Kirika shrugged her shoulders. “I dunno. I’ve adjusted, I guess. As someone who has spent her life traveling from place to place to place and has only ever spent two months at a time at each place, I’m pretty good when it comes to adapting.”

 

“Two months?”

 

“Yeah, that was my limit.”

 

“Why give yourself a time limit?”

 

“Just because. Made things easier for me.”

 

“How so?”

 

“Y’know, I’m actually kinda tired,” she said, breaking the topic. “I’m gonna head to bed. Goodnight.”

 

“Hmm. Goodnight.”

 

And they departed to their separate rooms.

 

Two-month time limit. Another rule Kirika was breaking. Or had already broken at this point.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is kind of a stupid chapter, and I apologise for that, haha Enjoy anyway x3


	48. August 9th, 2009

Late the following morning, there was a knock on Kirika’s door. She was awake, but stuck staring at the calendar on her wall.

 

“Come in,” she said.

 

Akihiko opened the door. He stood in the doorway for a moment, jacket slung over his shoulder. “You seem pretty intrigued by that calendar.”

 

“August. It’s August. I got here in the beginning of April. That means I’ve been here for exactly four months now.”

 

“So?”

 

“So…I have two-month time limit.” She let out a heavy sigh. She had been up practically all night thinking about that damn time limit of hers. And she hated that. “For just about my entire life, I’ve only ever spent two months at a place. Two months, and then I would move on to the next place. And now I’ve been here for four frigging months.”

 

“Is that such a bad thing?”

 

“Honestly, I don’t know. I just…” She shook her head. “Never mind.”

 

He thought for a moment. “Why have you stayed here for this long?”

 

“Because shit keeps happening.”

 

“Shit keeps happening?”

 

“Yeah, I know it sounds ridiculous, but…” She sighed again. “Either way, Idun won’t let me run this time.”

 

“Did she bring you back here?”

 

“Yeah…just in time, too, I guess.” She looked at him, still standing in the doorway. “You can actually come in, you know.”

 

“Technically, I can’t.”

 

“Why not?”

 

“School rules.”

 

She smiled. “But I don’t attend the school.”

 

“Yes, but I do.”

 

“That rule doesn’t just apply at night?”

 

Now he laughed. “All right, what’s on your mind?”

 

“Hmm?”

 

“I’m assuming you want to talk privately about something.”

 

“Not really, just don’t want you hanging out in the doorway.”

 

“Then I wanna discuss this time limit a bit more,” he said.

 

She held back an eyeroll. “Of course you do.” She walked up to him and pulled him into the room before closing the door. “What do you want to know?”

 

“What did you do that for?”

 

“I don’t want the whole dorm overhearing this conversation.”

 

“No one’s even around.”

 

“Still not taking any chances.”

 

“Then why me?”

 

“Why you what?”

 

“Why tell me?”

 

“Because you’re asking.”

 

“Mitsuru asked you last night and you didn’t tell her anything. You avoided the topic instead.”

 

She wasn’t gonna focus on how good of a point that was. “Hold on.” She paused. “Kirijo asked you to talk to me about this, didn’t she? She asked you to get info about me for her, yeah?”

 

He sighed. “Well—”

 

“Tch. I can’t believe you’re spying on me for her.”

 

“What? No. I’m not spying.”

 

“Whatever. Just get out.”

 

“Kirika—”

 

“Out.” She opened the door for him and he exited the room. “This is exactly why I don’t trust people.” She looked at him once more before slamming the door in his face. “Thanks a lot, Idun. You’re supposed to be protecting me from shit like this. So, no more putting your guard down. From here on out, your defences remain up. And as soon as all of this is over, we’re gone.”


	49. August 15th, 2009

The week the group attended summer school, Kirika took to the streets for more palm reading and tarot sessions. Knowing it was summer break, she took advantage of that fact and set up her station outside the mall.

 

By the end of the week, she was almost positive she had done a reading for every single Gekkoukan High student. And as she wrapped things up, a few of the group members came across her. All her Kohai.

 

“Hey, Nishioka-san,” Junpei greeted her. “What are you doing here?”

 

“Business,” she said.

 

“Oh, do you work at the mall?” Fuuka said.

 

“No, I work anywhere and everywhere.”

 

Yukari giggled a bit. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

 

“Don’t worry about it.” She paused. “Summer school’s out for good now, right?”

 

Junpei smiled. “Hell yeah. Minato and I are gonna celebrate at the arcade while the girls do some shopping.”

 

“Would you like to join us, Senpai?” Fuuka said.

 

“Thanks, but I’ll pass,” Kirika said. “I have other places to be.” She slung her bag over her shoulder. “See you all back at the dorm.”

 

With that, she made her way for Port Island Station. Once she reached Iwatodai, though, she didn’t head back to the dorm. Instead, she headed for the abandoned houses. And when she arrived, she climbed into the brick house without a moment’s hesitation.

 

“What are you doing back here?” Shinjiro asked from the next room over. She followed his voice to find him lying on the futon with a book in his hands. “Shouldn’t you be at the dorm?”

 

“Didn’t feel like being there.”

 

He flipped a page. “Being a part of the group fall through already?”

 

“No. Your buddy _Aki_ is just a bit of an ass.”

 

“Aki? Yeah, I get that. The hell did he do, though?”

 

“Asking me about shit because Kirijo asked him to.”

 

His brow furrowed a bit. “That doesn’t sound like him.”

 

“People change in two years.”

 

“You really think it’s been two years since I last saw him?” He shook his head. “I see him around more often than I like.”

 

“Either way, that was the case.”

 

“I’m sure there was a good reason.”

 

“What reason?”

 

“Well…what were you talking about? Or what was he asking you about?”

 

“My time limit,” she said. “Why I only spend two months at a time in a place.”

 

“Oh yeah, I remember you mentioning that.” He finally put down the book and sat up. “Aren’t you past your limit by now?”

 

“Four months,” she said.

 

“Four months over?”

 

“No, I’ve been here for four months.”

 

“Ah.” He looked downwards. “I still bet Aki had a reason other than Kirijo asking him to intervene.”

 

“Why do you say that?”

 

“Because Aki is the kind of guy who actually does give a shit.”

 

“Y’know, I really don’t wanna talk about this anymore.” She shook her head, falling into the armchair. “This is all so ridiculous.”

 

“Don’t complain to me.” He picked his book back up. “I thought you were supposed to be pissed at me.”

 

“I’m too busy being pissed at your best friend.”

 

“Well, go back to being pissed at me. I’m the better person to be pissed at.”

 

“You’re just saying that to get rid of me because you can’t stand my presence.”

 

“You’re not supposed to know me that well.”

 

She laughed. “One and the same, Aragaki. Remember?”

 

“Ah, yeah, that’s right.” He shook his head. “If anything’s ridiculous, it’s you.”

 

“If I’m ridiculous, then that means you’re ridiculous.”

 

He turned another page. “Shut up.” He paused before putting the book down again. “You do know you have to return to the dorm tonight, right?”

 

“I don’t have to do anything.”

 

“Nishioka, I will drag you back to that dorm if I have to.”

 

“Tch. No, you won’t.”

 

“Just get back to the dorm.”

 

“Why?”

 

“Because the dorm isn’t this place. You can’t just take off and disappear for days at a time. It didn’t matter when you disappeared on me, but if you disappear on Aki and Kirijo, then they’ll have a fit.”

 

She sighed, folding her arms across her chest. “Yeah? So what? They’re not my frigging guardians.”

 

“Don’t be a child.”

 

“Fine,” she said. “Thanks for nothing.”

 

“Whatever. Just stay out of trouble.”

 

“Yeah, you too.”

 

She took a deep breath and took her leave. She also took her time returning to the dorm. By the time she arrived, the sun was beginning to set.

 

“Welcome back, Senpai,” Ken greeted her as she walked through the door. “How are you feeling?”

 

“Uhm. I’m okay,” she said.

 

“That’s good. Sanada-san wanted me to ask you for him. He mentioned something about you not seeming like yourself this past week.”

 

“Can’t say I know what he means.”

 

“Oh, do you plan on attending the Summer Festival tomorrow?” he then changed the subject.

 

“Summer Festival?”

 

“Only the best event of the summer,” Junpei said as he and the rest of her Kohai entered the dorm. “Girls in yukatas and—”

 

“That’s all I need to hear to know not to go,” Kirika said.

 

Yukari laughed. “Good call.”

 

“By the way, I’ve been informed that Akihiko-Senpai and Mitsuru-Senpai are both out,” Fuuka then said. “So, we won’t be going to Tartarus tonight.”

 

“Then I’m heading up to bed,” Kirika said. And that’s what she did. She retired to her room for the night to find herself staring at the calendar again. “Four months,” she said under her breath. “I can’t stay any longer.” She turned her gaze out the window. “I need to get out of here.”


	50. August 16th, 2009

Kirika left her room the next day to see the rest of the girls gathered at the end of the hallway, all in yukatas.

 

“Nishioka,” Mitsuru said when she saw her. “Will you be attending the Summer Festival with us?”

 

Yukari grinned. “This is your last chance to change your mind.”

 

“Still gonna pass,” Kirika said.

 

“I think Minato and Junpei have already left,” Fuuka said. “Maybe we should meet them there.”

 

“Yes, let us go now,” Aigis said.

 

Kirika waved them off. “Have fun.”

 

They headed down the stairs and she sat at one of the chairs at the end of the hallway. It wasn’t long before Akihiko joined her. When he did, she grabbed one of the magazines on the table.

 

“Why aren’t you attending the festival?” he spoke up.

 

“Why aren’t you?”

 

“Not really my thing.”

 

“Exactly.”

 

He paused. “So…what did you do all week?”

 

“Not much.”

 

“No? You didn’t go anywhere or hang out with anyone or—?”

 

She sighed, tossing the magazine aside. “Why do you have such a strong desire to know what I do with my free time? You’re almost as obsessed with that as you are with training and protein shakes.”

 

Now he laughed. “Am I really that bad?”

 

“Kinda, yeah.”

 

“All right, I’ll tone it down with the protein shakes.”

 

“No you won’t.”

 

“Oh, am I that easy to read?”

 

“Sometimes.” She looked up at him and smiled. “I think I get Kirijo’s point now.”

 

“Yeah, I think so, too.”

 

She nodded, the smile slowly fading. Then she swallowed hard. “I, uh, have a two-month time limit so that I can’t grow attached to people.”

 

He furrowed his brow. “Huh?”

 

“The reason I stay in cities and towns for only two months at a time. It was enough time for me to earn a sufficient amount of money, so I could provide for myself and continue traveling, but then it wasn’t enough time for me to develop any sort of relationship with people in the area. No names or background info or anything of the sort. Then that meant no goodbyes. No keeping in touch. None of that emotional bullshit.”

 

“You don’t…like getting attached to people?”

 

“You can’t lose someone when you’re not attached to anyone.”

 

“Hmm.” His gaze fell to the floor. “So, what exactly has made you stay here for as long as you have?”

 

“Idun,” she said. “But I’m seriously losing my mind being here and I’m losing reasons to stay. I kinda just wanna take off.”

 

He looked back up at her, eyes a little wide. “W-what? No, you can’t leave.”

 

“I can’t stay, either.”

 

“Kirika, please…” He sighed. “At least stay until we defeat the last of the Shadows. Is that too much to ask?”

 

“Aren’t there still three left? That would mean sticking around for another three months. Possibly four depending on how things play out. And I’m already two months past my limit.”

 

“Please… What can I do to convince you to stay?”

 

“Why do you even want me to stay so badly? It’s not like I actually add anything to the group.”

 

“Yes, you do. Why are you constantly selling yourself short?”

 

She looked down, shrugging her shoulders. “Doesn’t matter either way. No matter how much I want to take off, I already know Idun won’t let me leave.”

 

“Good.” He stood up.

 

“Akihiko—”

 

“Listen, just stay until all the Shadows have been defeated, like I said. After that, you can do whatever you want to do. You can go wherever you want to go. You’ll have no ties and no obligation to stay in the city, nor will I try to make you stay.”

 

“Hmph. Fine.”

 

“Okay. And if you end up changing your mind once this is all over and done with, then great. If not, then—”

 

“Stop.” She stood up as well. “I’ll stay, but I won’t be changing my mind about leaving. As soon as this is done, I’m gone.”

 

He swallowed hard. “Fine. But no trying to take off beforehand.”

 

“Fine.”

 

“Fine.”

 

And they stood there for a few moments, just staring at each other. Then Kirika finally looked away, but she could still feel Akihiko’s gaze on her.

 

“This stays between us, right?” she said.

 

“Of course,” he said. “The other day…my intention wasn’t to spy. I just—”

 

“You don’t need to explain yourself.”

 

“But—”

 

“I really don’t wanna hear it.”

 

He sighed. “I’m sorry.”

 

“Tch. Saying sorry doesn’t automatically fix everything.” With that, she began to head back to her room.

 

“I know. You said that the very first day we met.”

 

She stopped and looked back at him. “Excuse me?”

 

“When I almost hit you and apologised for it. You said that you completely forgot saying sorry automatically fixes everything.”

 

“You—you actually remember that?”

 

He smiled. “How could I forget?”

 

She held back a blush while Idun practically fluttered within her. “I cannot believe you remember that.”

 

“Well, it was probably one of the rudest encounters I’ve ever had.”

 

Now she smiled. “Shut up.”

 

He laughed. “Does this mean we’re on good terms again?”

 

“For now.”

 

“I’ll take it.”

 

“It’s all you have.”

 

“For now.”

 

She raised an eyebrow. “Let’s go grab a bite to eat.”

 

“Wow, are you the one suggesting we get food for once?”

 

“Don’t make me change my mind.”

 

“Okay, okay, let’s go.”

 

As they headed out, Minato and Junpei were returning to the dorm.

 

“Hey, guys,” Akihiko greeted them. “How was the festival?”

 

“Not bad,” Minato said.

 

“The girls looked so incredibly hot,” Junpei said. “Although, I really wish I could’ve seen you in a yukata, too, Nishioka-san.”

 

Akihiko shook his head. “Shut up, Iori.”

 

“Keep those perverted thoughts to yourself,” Kirika said.

 

“R-right,” Junpei said. “Sorry…”

 

“Well, we’re heading out,” Akihiko then said. “Let Mitsuru know if she asks.”

 

“Later, Senpai,” Minato said.

 

They exited the dorm and made their way for the strip mall.

 

“Arisato really doesn’t ever say much, does he?” Kirika said.

 

“Not unless he’s spoken to directly, usually,” Akihiko said.

 

“Hmm. Strange.”

 

“Not as strange as you.”

 

“What? How am I strange?”

 

“You’re kidding, right?”

 

“Oh, what? You mean my so-called attitude?”

 

“That’s exactly what I mean. But what do you mean _so-called_? Your attitude is your most prominent feature.”

 

“Yeah? And I thought my most prominent feature was my eyes.” She jokingly blinked in a flirtatious way a couple times before laughing. “Well, I’m sure I’ve apologised for my attitude more than once.”

 

“I thought saying sorry didn’t fix anything.”

 

“Really? You’re gonna use my own words against me?”

 

He smiled. “If you make it easy enough.”

 

“So that’s how you play this game?”

 

“What can I say? I never lose.”

 

“Oh, we’ll see about that.”

 

“Do I detect a challenge?”

 

“Sure. Let’s start with…” She quickened her pace a bit. “Last one to Hagakure pays.”

 

With that, she took off running. It didn’t take very long for Akihiko to catch up with her, though. And when he passed her and beat her to the restaurant, she found herself content with the fact that he hadn’t thrown the race to let her win. Yet, by the end of their meal, he somehow still ended up paying. Kirika cursed him under her breath for that, but it didn’t sway the contentment she felt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just wanna vent for a moment to say that I am now fifty chapters in and I've only received a single comment so far and that was on, like, chapter two. I guess I really shouldn't be all that surprised, but... I dunno, whatever. Never mind it. Like I said, just venting...rambling. Makes no difference, either way, haha


	51. August 24th, 2009

The next week passed by at a rapid pace. Kirika spent it mainly at the dorm due to the heat, but every so often she and Akihiko would venture out to grab a bite to eat, or just to go for a walk.

 

Tartarus trips continued to happen every other night or so, depending on each individual group member’s condition. She was growing more and more used to her Evoker and her ability to summon Idun so much more easily now. It was like a weight off her shoulders not having to persuade her to emerge and help out.

 

Idun was still ardently nagging at her, though. Nagging her about Akihiko. Nagging her about Shinjiro. Nagging her about that damn time limit. That one Kirika didn’t really understand. After all, Idun was the one who had wanted her to return to the city in the first place. Idun was the one who had dragged her back in the direction of the city. And, at the time, Kirika didn’t question it; she just went along with every step and every stop in between. Now she was questioning it, though. She hadn’t reached the point of regret yet, but she was balancing precariously on that double-edged sword.

 

On this evening, Idun was nagging her specifically about Akihiko. Kirika realised she hadn’t seen him all day, and it was nearing six o’clock in the evening. So, she decided she would head out to try to find him. Only, she didn’t have to go very far; the white-haired teen was sitting on the front steps.

 

“Akihiko?” she announced her presence.

 

He looked up at her. “Oh. Hey.”

 

She tentatively put a hand on his shoulder—unsure of where the sudden desire for contact had come from—and leaned down a little. “Up for a walk?”

 

He nodded. “Yeah.”

 

He stood up and they were on their way. Kirika kept the conversation going at first, not wanting Akihiko to feel obligated to participate. She talked about whatever came to her mind. Idle chatter. And when he stopped walking, she stopped talking.

 

“You know that old friend of mine I’ve mentioned before?” he said.

 

“The one I remind you of?”

 

“Yeah, that one.”

 

“What about him?”

 

“He used to be a member of the group.” He paused. “I’m not sure if I ever mentioned that to you.”

 

“I think I put two and two together.”

 

“Right. Well,” he started walking again and she followed, “I keep asking him to rejoin and he keeps saying no.”

 

“Why’s that?”

 

“Something happened a couple years ago…”

 

“An incident that resulted in his departure, I presume?” She didn’t have to presume. The brunette had already mentioned it to her.

 

“Exactly.”

 

“So…what happened?” She knew she wouldn’t find out from the other, but she also knew Akihiko just might tell her.

 

He swallowed hard. “He, Mitsuru, and I were chasing down a Shadow in the city. It was actually at Port Island Station. The group had just formed, and it was just the three of us at the time. My friend and I were still pretty new to our abilities and still getting used them.” He paused. “And my friend—Well…he lost control of his Persona a-and…there was a casualty.”

 

Her eyes widened a bit. She knew Shinjiro had never been up for talking about why he left, but she never imagined that would’ve been the reason. “W-what?”

 

He cleared his throat. “There was a woman nearby who hadn’t transmogrified and he accidentally killed her. It all happened so quickly… Neither Mitsuru nor I had the chance to even try to prevent it.”

 

“No wonder he left…” _No wonder he never wanted to talk about it_.

 

“I know. And I probably come off as a shitty friend for trying to make him come back after something like that, but…” He sighed. “I just feel like he’s wasting his abilities.”

 

“So, he doesn’t use his Persona anymore?”

 

“No. He handed in his Evoker when he left the group.”

 

She nodded. “I’m sorry, but I can understand why he wouldn’t want to rejoin. But what I can’t understand is why you feel like he’s wasting his abilities.”

 

“He has this incredible power and he’s refusing to use it.”

 

“So? Akihiko, no offence, but…that’s basically the same argument Strega was making as to why we shouldn’t eliminate the Dark Hour.”

 

“It is not.”

 

“Yes, it is.”

 

They stopped moving again as they fell silent. Kirika remained calm as she could tell Akihiko was struggling to stay calm himself. She took a step closer to him and placed a hand on his shoulder once more. He closed his eyes, dropping his head.

 

“That’s not really the reason…” he spoke up. “Not the main reason.”

 

“Then what is?”

 

“I just wanna be able to keep him out of trouble.”

 

“If I’m truly anything like this guy, then I’m assuming he can be pretty reckless.”

 

“He tends to hang out at that back alley.” He paused. “I wouldn’t be surprised if you’ve seen him around.”

 

She laughed a bit tentatively. “Maybe I have.” Of course, she had. He didn’t need to know that right now, though. “Then again, it’s not like I’ve hung out there enough to actually meet or remember anyone else.” That was a lie, too.

 

“Anyway…yeah, I wanna keep an eye on him.”

 

“There’s nothing wrong with that.”

 

“There is when I only keep pissing him off.”

 

“Hmm.” She prompted them to start walking once again. “I’m sorry to hear that.”

 

“It’s not your fault.” He paused. “When you brought up Strega earlier, it reminded me… Did you mean what you said?”

 

“You have to be a little more specific than that.”

 

“Did you mean what you said about your powers? That you’d be more than happy to get rid of them?”

 

“Ah. That.” She thought for a moment. “When my Persona first awakened, I was more frightened of it than anything else. I didn’t want anything to do with those powers. I wanted to find a way to get rid of them and I refused to even ever try to use them. I hated everything about them.”

 

“Why?”

 

“I have my reasons. In the end, though, I grew accustomed to them. Then I began to utilise them more and more. But that didn’t make me hate them any less.”

 

“I see. So, if you still had the opportunity to give them up, you would?”

 

“Probably. And if we successfully eliminate the Dark Hour, then I’ll have my opportunity at last.”

 

“Guess so…”

 

“By the way, who was the woman who had gotten caught in the crossfire those two years ago?”

 

He took a deep breath. “Amada’s mother.”

 

She froze, eyes wide again. “The kid?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“Oh, shit…”

 

“Exactly.”

 

“Y’know, I thought you seemed uncomfortable around him, but I figured it was just because he seems to idolise you.”

 

“That does make it a bit more awkward.”

 

“And now he has the Potential? Wow, that’s pretty damn incredible…”

 

“Either way, it doesn’t make things any easier.”

 

“No, I know. I get that.”

 

They fell quiet and soon found themselves in front of the dorm. They stopped at the base of the stairs.

 

“Good timing, Senpai,” Junpei said, poking his head out the door. “We’re gonna go to Tartarus tonight, so be sure to get ready.”

 

“All right,” Kirika said.

 

“This stays between us, right?” Akihiko said once Iori was gone.

 

“Of course.” She smiled. “Your secrets are all safe with me.”

 

“They’re not necessarily secrets…” He chuckled a bit. “Thanks anyway, though.”

 

“No problem.” She paused. “Well, we better prepare ourselves for Tartarus.”

 

“Oh, right, I guess so.”

 

With that, they headed back inside the dorm. With that, Kirika felt even closer to Akihiko. Closer than she ever wanted to be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would just like to, uhm...awkwardly thank everyone who left a comment on my last chapter after I ~pathetically~ ranted about being fifty chapters in and had only received a single comment, haha I do appreciate the time y'all took to respond to the story. So, thank you x3


	52. August 26th, 2009

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As aforementioned in an earlier chapter, the tarot deck referenced in this chapter is the "Tarot of the Witches" deck by Fergus Hall, published in 1991

A couple evenings later, Kirika found herself at Paulownia Mall to stop by the café. From there, she headed to the brick house.

 

“How the hell can you still be wearing that coat in the middle of this frigging heat wave?” she said as she handed the cup of tea to Shinjiro and sat down on the futon.

 

“Says the girl drinking hot coffee,” he said.

 

“Whatever.”

 

He took a sip. “The hell you doing here?”

 

“Remember that man I did the tarot reading for a little over a month ago now?” she said. “You had seen him before he walked away, right?”

 

He nodded. “What of it?”

 

“So, you know he was—”

 

“The Chairman. Yeah, that’s why I know it was ridiculous when you said it was the most negative reading you’d ever done. That man doesn’t have a bad bone in his body.”

 

“Idun doesn’t like him.”

 

His brow furrowed. “Is there a point to this?”

 

“I officially met him recently and he acted as if he didn’t know me.”

 

“Technically he didn’t.”

 

“Shut up, you know what I mean.”

 

“Fine. Then how did you act?”

 

“I didn’t know what else to do, so I just went along with it.”

 

“Let it go, then.”

 

“Easy for you to say.” She paused. “Would you let me do a reading for you?”

 

“Huh?”

 

“A tarot reading. Can I do one for you.”

 

“You sure that let go fast.”

 

She shrugged her shoulders. “For now, yeah. And I’ll continue to let it go if you let me do a reading for you.”

 

“I ain’t superstitious like that.”

 

“C’mon, it’ll be fun.” She took a sip of her coffee to hide her smirk. “Let’s see how messed up you really are.”

 

“Tch. Why are you even here? Still pissed at Aki?”

 

“No, we sorted things out.” Another sip. “So, what do you say?”

 

“You ain’t gonna leave till I agree to it, huh?”

 

Now she smiled. “Glad you could figure that out on your own.”

 

He sighed, rolling his eyes at her. “Fine.”

 

So, they settled down on the futon, and she pulled her tarot deck out. She handed it over to Shinjiro. “Shuffle the deck to your liking, and think of the question you wanna focus on.”

 

“I don’t have a question.”

 

“C’mon, there has to be something you think about often enough.”

 

“Hmm.” He thought for a moment, absentmindedly shuffling the deck. “I dunno. Guess I’ve just always wondered what would become of me.” He set the deck down. “That good enough?”

 

“It’ll do.” She picked the deck back up and spread the cards. “Just take this seriously or else it won’t be accurate.” She pursed her lips, ignoring the scoff he gave her in return. “The first card is your present position, so it simply represents who you are.” She flipped the first card over. “The Hierophant. Mercy, kindness, good advice, inspiration, alliance, humility, compassion, servitude, inactivity, overly reserved, fear, timidity, captivity, lack of conviction, afraid to face facts, unrealistic, inability to adapt. So, you’re a gentle soul, but you don’t see this about yourself. Instead, you feel trapped within your own mind, and have distanced yourself from those around you. Hmm. Makes sense so far.” Another smirk with another scoffed response. “The next card is your immediate influence, which pertains to the nature of involvement or the obstacles which lie just ahead.” She flipped the second card. “Ten of Swords. Pain, affliction, sadness, tears, trouble, mental anguish, misfortune, desolation. So, you’re being a depressing, stubborn jackass who—”

 

“I thought this was supposed to be taken seriously,” he spoke up.

 

“I am being serious. The cards may not state it, but most of this pain is self-inflicted.” She cleared her throat. “Moving on, the next card is your goal or destiny. It’ll confirm just how much can be accomplished based on current conditions.” She flipped the third card. “Three of Cups. Resolution of a problem, conclusion, healing, mending, compromise, solace. Well, I guess that correlates well with your question at hand. Gives the impression you’ll be successful with coming into your own, as well as your goal.”

 

“Can’t say I really have a goal in mind.”

 

“Fine. Whatever will become of you, then, you’ll be content with it in the end.” She looked over the spread. “Next is your distant past. It roughly shows events of the past and how they could impact you now.” She flipped the fourth card over. “Queen of Swords. Quick-witted, keen, sadness, loneliness, privation, separation, mourning. You’ve dealt with a lot of hardships, but you’ve dealt with them head-on, despite being alone. Hmm. Also, seemingly, accurate.” No response. “The next card is recent past events. These are all the current influences of what’s going on in your life.” She flipped the fifth card. “Nine of Swords. Misery, quarrel, disappointment, despair, unhappiness, concern. You’re still dealing with a lot of hardships, and you tend to think the worst of yourself, even though that’s not always the case. But you’ll start a fight without anyone who tries to tell you otherwise.” She hesitated. “Like with Akihiko, for instance. Perhaps when he talks about the kid’s mother.”

 

Shinjiro’s eyes widened a bit. “Excuse me?”

 

She froze. “Uhm.” Damn it, she probably shouldn’t have brought that up. Especially not so casually. “He told me.”

 

“Tch. Of course he did.” He shook his head. “Just keep going. Thinking about that ain’t gonna help anything.”

 

“Right. So, uh, the next card is your future influence. In a broad sense, it’s what’s to come from your inspirations.” She flipped the sixth card. “Nine of Batons. Expectation of difficulties, strength, confrontation, hidden enemies, ill health. So, despite the fact that you’re making yourself sick with those damn pills you get from Strega—the maybe not-so-hidden enemies—you still have some fight left in you. And that must be good since you still seem to expect the worse to happen.”

 

“Too bad I ain’t interested in fighting.”

 

She swallowed hard. “Okay. The next card is the Questioner. It shows you in your present position and your attitude on current events.” She flipped the seventh card. “The Moon. Caution, danger, scandal, disillusionment, error, deception, trickery, bad influences, ulterior motives, insincerity, selfishness, shallowness, unknown enemies. So, it seems like you’re having a difficult time accepting what it is you want and where you want to be. It also seems to be referring to Strega once more. The so-called unknown enemies who are most definitely deceiving you.” He scoffed at her once again and she let out a soft sigh. “Next is your environmental factors. This is your effect on the people around you and how they may affect you in return.” She flipped the eighth card. “The Star. And it’s facing me, which means it’ll have a reversed connotation. Usually, it means hope, satisfaction, bright prospects, destiny, insight, easily influenced, preparing for new horizons, mixing of past and present for future, good omen, culmination of hard work. Instead, though, it now represents—”

 

“Despair, disappointment, setbacks, destruction, and just overall darkness. Yeah, that’s great.”

 

“That’s your fault for being so damn brooding. But you’re not—”

 

His brow furrowed. “Just get this over with so you can get out.”

 

She took a deep breath. “Next is your inner emotions. It tells of your hidden hopes and secret desires, fears, and anxieties. It also contains those thoughts that will follow you into the future.” She flipped the ninth card. “Two of Coins. Complications, hindrances, embarrassment, worry. So, you continue to fear the worst.” She let out a soft sigh. “You may or may not believe this, but stop being so damn hard on yourself. Learn to be at peace with who you are. With what has happened and what may happen. Think you could do that?” She waited for a response, but got nothing in return. “Fine. The last card is your final result. It shows the culmination of every single one of your influences as revealed by the other cards in the spread.” She flipped the tenth and final card over. Her breath caught in her throat. “Death.” She let out a shaky breath. “Sudden or unexpected change, loss, a surprise event, failure, destruction, end, illness, finality, deep influence, permanent scar on mind, a possible blessing in disguise. So, uhm…” She cleared her throat. “Looks like you will be prepared for the best or the worst.”

 

Shinjiro’s cup of tea was back in his hands already. “Looks like you’re maybe taking this a bit too seriously,” he spoke up after a few long moments of silence.

 

“Death as a final result isn’t really a good thing.”

 

“Why not? You said yourself it can be a blessing in disguise.”

 

“Based on your initial question, though—”

 

“Stop overthinking it and just get your ass back to the dorm.”

 

Kirika didn’t move at first; she just sat on the futon in silence, debating whether or not she wanted to listen. Then she finally got up and made her way towards the window. Then she stopped again. “For the record, I’m on your side.”

 

“The hell you talking about?”

 

“I understand why you wouldn’t want to rejoin the group.”

 

“Tch. I don’t need you to understand my reasons. Better yet, you didn’t need to know. So why the hell would he even tell you?”

 

She shrugged her shoulders. “Maybe because he trusts me.”

 

“Good for him. Doesn’t make it his issue to tell.”

 

“He’s worried about you. The only reason he keeps asking you to come back is so he can make sure you’re not getting into trouble.”

 

“I don’t need him watching out for me. And I sure as hell don’t need you looking out for me, either.”

 

“I’m sure the group has changed since you left. It has been nearly two years, after all.”

 

“I didn’t like the way Kirijo ran things to begin with.”

 

“Well, it’s not just her group anymore. We make decisions as a team.”

 

“I thought you understood why I don’t want to go back.”

 

“I do—”

 

“Then why the hell does it sound like you’re trying to persuade me. Tch. Did Aki put you up to this?”

 

“No, he still isn’t aware of the fact that we even know each other.”

 

“Yet he still told you? Tch.” He shook his head. “Just get out of here.”

 

“Okay, I’m going.” She took a few steps closer to window, but stopped again. “Y’know, it seems like Akihiko has remained a good friend to you. So maybe it’s time for you to be a good friend to him in return.”

 

“What a load of shit coming from you,” he said.

 

Her eyes widened a bit. “Excuse me?”

 

“You don’t do friendships, right? Yet here you are trying to lecture me about not being a good friend.”

 

Now she clenched her jaw. “Yet, somehow, I seem to have a better understanding than you do.”

 

“No. You think you have an understanding of every damn thing, Nishioka, but you can’t even figure out your own frigging Persona. So maybe learn to understand yourself before claiming you understand someone else and their issues.”

 

“I do get it, Aragaki. Whether you wanna believe that or not.”

 

“There’s no way you could understand that sort of guilt. You don’t have to live with it every single day of your life.”

 

She opened her mouth to respond, but the words caught in her throat. _Why_? Why did she feel as if she did understand that guilt? Why was Idun telling her—?

 

“Exactly,” Shinjiro went on. “So, for the last time, get out of here.”

 

Now it was like Kirika couldn’t move. She was stuck in that spot, and she would remain stuck until she found the words she could push out of her mouth. “Maybe,” she started, “you need to change the way you live your life. Maybe instead of waiting for those damn pills to do their job…you fight for what you have left.” She turned her back on him. “I don’t believe in fighting, either, but there’s a purpose to this war. A purpose that’s greater than the both of us. And if you wanted any sort of relief from your guilt, you’d realised that.” She swallowed hard. “You’d understand that.”

 

She took her leave. And during her walk back to the dorm, all she could think about was how much she had left to learn. How much to had left to understand. How maybe it was time to take her own advice.


	53. August 28th, 2009

Another couple evenings later, there was a knock on Kirika’s bedroom door. “Come in,” she said.

 

Akihiko opened the door. “Sorry to bother you. The Chairman’s here. Could you join the rest of the group upstairs?”

 

“Sure.”

 

Without another word, they headed up to the Command Room and found seats beside one another.

 

“Good, you’re all here,” the Chairman said. He looked toward the door. “Please, come in.”

 

Ken Amada then entered the Command Room. “Sorry to interrupt.”

 

“You must be kidding…” Akihiko said under his breath. He glanced at Kirika and she shot him a quick, uncertain smile.

 

“After running several tests,” the Chairman went on, “we’ve learned that he has more than adequate Potential. I called this meeting so that I could introduce him, since he’ll be joining our squad.”

 

“B-but Mr. Chairman, he’s still in elementary school,” Mitsuru said. “Besides—”

 

“Besides…what? His ability is quite promising. With the proper training, he could be a big help.”

 

“But is _he_ okay with it?” Akihiko said.

 

“Actually, I asked to join,” Ken spoke up. “I believe I can be of some assistance… Now I finally know why I was given this power.”

 

“So, as you can see, it was his own decision,” the Chairman said.

 

“Nice to meet you all. I’ll try not to get in anyone’s way.”

 

“Nice to meet you, too,” Aigis said.

 

Akihiko looked down and Kirika discreetly nudged him with her elbow.

 

“Hey, don’t worry, kid,” Junpei said. “We got your back. It may be hard at times, but stick with it.”

 

“Yes, got it,” Ken said.

 

The meeting was dismissed and everyone headed back downstairs. But Akihiko stopped Kirika on the third floor, and Mitsuru ended up stopping with them.

 

“So…first a dog and now an elementary schooler,” Kirika said. “Pretty crazy stuff.” She thought for a moment. “Think it was actually his own choice to join?”

 

“I do,” Mitsuru said. “After all, he is very sure of himself. I believe he would be a great addition to SEES. His age does worry me, though. We will need to keep a close eye on him. Especially you, Nishioka.”

 

“Oh. Y-yeah, of course.”

 

“Ken’s a pretty amazing kid,” Akihiko spoke up, still lost in thought. “Even Ikutsuki-san thinks so. He’s young, but he thinks like an adult…” He paused. “I’m just having a hard time taking it all in. I can’t believe this is really happening.”

 

“I know what you mean,” Mitsuru said. “After the incident…”

 

“No kidding,” Akihiko said.

 

“You don’t think that has anything to do with it, right?” Kirika said.

 

Mitsuru looked at her, puzzled, before her eyes turned to Akihiko. “Did you tell her what happened?”

 

He nodded. “The other day, yeah.”

 

“Ah. Well, I can’t see that having anything to do with Amada’s decision.”

 

With that, she continued her way downstairs. Kirika and Akihiko exchanged glances before going down another flight as well. Then they stopped at the second floor.

 

“Does Amada know the full story?” she spoke up.

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“About his mother.”

 

“Honestly…I’m not sure.” He sighed. “I can’t believe this.”

 

“I can’t believe the Chairman let a child join the group.”

 

“Like he said, it was Amada’s own choice.”

 

“It’s dangerous, though. His choice or not, he’s still only a kid. He has his whole life ahead of him.”

 

“You say that like he joined as a death wish or something.”

 

“I just… What does he have to gain by being a part of this group?”

 

“Everyone has their own reason for fighting. Their own inner struggle. Maybe joining the group will benefit him in the end.”

 

She raised an eyebrow at him. “You’re actually okay with this?”

 

“Well, it wasn’t my decision to make. And it’s already been decided, so there’s no point in arguing.” He shook his head. “Sorry, but I think I’m gonna turn in early,” he then said. “It’s been a long day.”

 

She swallowed hard. “Right.”

 

“Hmm. Goodnight, Kirika.”

 

Now she smiled sheepishly. “G’night.”

 

She watched him walk down the hall and to his room. Then she looked down the stairs leading to the lounge. She sighed before deciding to turn around and head back up to her own room. Somehow, it really had been a long day.


	54. August 31st, 2009

It was the final day of summer break. Kirika was pretty excited for it, too. That meant the dorm would be empty during the day again. And that meant she could spend time alone outside of her bedroom again. It also meant she could more easily avoid the group. It meant she could go out and do more readings without the fear of being seen by one of the others. Not that she feared they would reject her—she didn’t care about that. She just didn’t want them bombarding her with requests.

 

She headed out of her room and down to the lounge. Akihiko, Mitsuru, Aigis, and Ken were around, as per usual.

 

“Good afternoon,” Mitsuru greeted her.

 

“Afternoon,” Kirika said. She sat down next to Akihiko. “You guys ready to go back to school tomorrow?”

 

Mitsuru smiled. “Of course.”

 

“I, unfortunately, will not be attending school with the others,” Aigis said.

 

“I wish we could have a few more days of break,” Ken said. “Why don’t you go to school, Nishioka-san?”

 

Kirika shrugged her shoulders. “Just never have. No family to pay for it.”

 

“Oh. I’m sorry.”

 

“Don’t worry about it, kiddo.”

 

“As for me,” Akihiko said, “I’m more excited for the full moon next week.”

 

“Oh yeah, that is next week, huh?” She paused. “Actually, now that I think about it, I have seen a big increase of the Lost around the city.”

 

“Yes, it’s getting worse,” Mitsuru said. “So, we need to put a stop to it.”

 

“For now.”

 

“Excuse me?”

 

“Well, you’ll fight on the night of the full moon and defeat the Shadow. Cases of Apathy Syndrome will decrease, but it’s only temporary. Once the next full moon comes around, history repeats itself.”

 

“Until the last Shadow.”

 

“So you think. It’s not definite, though.”

 

Ken’s eyes widened a bit. “Not definite?”

 

“Kirika,” Akihiko said. He sighed, shaking his head. “Please, just stop.”

 

“I have full confidence in this plan,” Mitsuru then said.

 

Kirika couldn’t help but laugh. “I’m sorry, but it’s really not much of a plan. It’s exactly what you guys have been doing since April. Only difference now is the fact that you think it’s gonna change the world in the end. You have no proof, though. Nor do you have a plan for the aftermath.”

 

“The aftermath?” Ken spoke up again.

 

“In case this so-called plan falls through. What happens if the Dark Hour doesn’t actually end? What then?”

 

“Enough,” Mitsuru said, getting to her feet. “I’ve heard plenty.”

 

Kirika was taken aback by her little outburst. “I’m sorry, but I’m just the type of person who thinks about any and every possible consequence.”

 

“Have faith in this,” Akihiko said. “As far as we’re concerned, it is definite.”

 

“I’m not trying to be pessimistic. And I do have faith—”

 

“Then act like it,” Mitsuru said. “This conversation is over.” And she walked off.

 

“That was uncalled for,” Akihiko said once she had gone upstairs.

 

“Just being realistic,” Kirika said.

 

“What happens to the Lost once the Dark Hour is gone?” Ken then said. “Do they regain consciousness?”

 

“Hopefully,” Akihiko said. “Only one way to find out.” He looked to Kirika. “And we will find out.”

 

She sighed. “Yeah, of course we’ll find out.”

 

“And what will happen to us?” Ken went on.

 

Kirika and Akihiko both froze. They glanced at each other before looking back over at Ken.

 

“What do you mean, kiddo?” she said.

 

“Well, if the Dark Hour ceases to exist, then we won’t be able to summon our Personas anymore, right?”

 

Akihiko cleared his throat. “Right.”

 

“And what about our memories of the Dark Hour? Will those cease to exist as well?”

 

He paused. “Well—”

 

“Only time will tell,” Kirika said. “In the end, it won’t really matter either way. If we do remember, great. If we don’t…not like we’ll realise it.”

 

“Guess that’s true,” Ken said.

 

Akihiko suddenly stood up. “I’m, uh…gonna go for a run.”

 

Kirika’s brow furrowed. “In this heat?”

 

“Y-yeah. I’ll be back later.” And he left.

 

“Hmm.” She sat back. “I really need to watch what I say, don’t I?”

 

“No disrespect, Senpai, but maybe you should,” Ken said.

 

She pursed her lips. “Right.” She nodded. “Sorry, kiddo.”

 

“It’s all right.”

 

She smiled sheepishly. “Well, I think I’ll return to my room now before I can cause any more trouble today.” And she took her leave. When she reached the second landing, she saw Mitsuru seated in one of the chairs around the small table. “Since you’re here,” she started, “I apologise for my attitude down there. I can’t always control it.”

 

“It was uncalled for,” Mitsuru said.

 

“Yes, Akihiko scolded me already.”

 

“Hmph.” She paused, straightening up. “We’re fighting for the Lost just as much as we’re fighting for ourselves. We have every intention of eliminating the Dark Hour, no matter what it takes.”

 

“And I’m right there with you. I want the Dark Hour to end permanently just as much as the rest of you do. Trust me on that.”

 

“Then why don’t you prove it?”

 

“All I was trying to get at was that it might be smart to have a fallback plan in case this one doesn’t follow through.”

 

“It will, though. A recording was recovered from the night of the explosion—”

 

“Yeah, Akihiko mentioned something about that.” She paused. “What exactly was it that had happened again?”

 

“There was an experiment being conducted and it caused a terrible explosion. It was the explosion itself that created Tartarus and the Dark Hour.” Her gaze fell down. “It was my grandfather’s fault. My father and I are now trying to correct his mistakes.”

 

“Oh. Wow… Akihiko didn’t mention that part of it.” She shook her head. “Okay, so what about this recording? I don’t think I had him elaborate on it.”

 

“A recording was recovered from the night of the explosion of the lead scientist on the experiment. He said in the video that we should be able to reverse everything by fighting and defeating the twelve Shadows.”

 

“Who found this recording?”

 

“The Chairman.”

 

Her breath caught in her throat. That wasn’t a very reassuring fact. “Okay.”

 

“Okay?”

 

“Okay. I’ll believe it and I’ll go along with it.” _For now._ She still couldn’t shake Idun’s bad feeling towards the Chairman. “So just forget I said anything.”

 

“Nishioka, I wasn’t trying to disregard your thoughts—”

 

“That’s not what I’m implying.” She paused. “I’m gonna go back to my room now for the rest of the day.” And she walked away.

 

Kirika entered her room, closed the door behind her, and collapsed onto her bed. Idun was telling her she had crossed a line that day. Then she was telling herself she was still balancing on that double-edged sword.


	55. September 1st, 2009

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another month down!! I think September is the most condensed month...like, it has the most parts/updates or whatever. Stay tuned x3

Once everyone had left for school that morning, Kirika got ready to head to Port Island Station. As she was on her way out, though, she stopped at the sight of Aigis crouching in the lounge beside Koromaru.

 

“Hey, you gonna be okay alone?” she said.

 

“I am not alone,” Aigis said. “Koro-chan is with me.”

 

She knelt down to pet Koromaru. “He is good company, but he can’t really hold his end of a conversation. No offence, buddy.”

 

He only continued wagging his tail.

 

“Thank you, Nishioka-san, but I will be fine,” Aigis said. “I am used to spending my time alone.”

 

“Oh. Well, that’s sorta…depressing.”

 

“You need not worry about me.”

 

“Hmm. If you say so.” She paused as she stood back up. “Well then, guess I’ll just be back later.”

 

“Have a good day.”

 

With that, Kirika took off. She ended up dropping by the mall for a cup of coffee before returning to Port Island Station to set up for her readings. It was a slow day, but that was expected seeing as it was the first day of the new school semester. But she packed up her things and returned to the mall before school let out, not wanting to run into any of the members of the group. And by the time she headed back to the dorm, it was nearing five o’clock. She knew she should’ve stopped to get food on her way, but she wasn’t hungry. Besides, she had grown used to being lectured by Akihiko. It was almost…comforting, in a way. It was routine.

 

When she arrived at the dorm, Minato and Junpei were just returning as well. “Good evening, boys,” she greeted them.

 

“Hey, Senpai,” Junpei said, not sounding like his typical cheerful self.

 

She chuckled. “First day of school that bad?”

 

“Let’s just say, you’re lucky for not having to attend.”

 

The three of them entered the dorm.

 

“Oh, you’re back,” Yukari sad. “Perfect timing. Hey, Fuuka, is Aigis ready?”

 

Fuuka and Aigis then joined them. And Aigis was wearing a school uniform.

 

“Ready for what?” Junpei said.

 

“She said she wanted to go to school,” Yukari began, “so I said something to Mitsuru-senpai as a joke. But the Chairman overheard and thought it was a good idea. So as of tomorrow, she’ll be a junior.”

 

His eyes widened. “Seriously? He’s down for that?”

 

Fuuka nodded her head thoughtfully. “He said something about studying her behaviour in a social environment.”

 

“Well, as far as I’m concerned, it’s a great idea.” He smiled wide. “Just look at how cute she is in that uniform.”

 

“Shut up, Iori,” Kirika said, though she was chuckling.

 

“The camouflage Fuuka-san has provided me with seems to be the appropriate size,” Aigis said.

 

“It looks very natural on you; no one will suspect a thing,” Ken spoke up. “But why does he want you to go to school? It’s not like there’s anything special about it.”

 

“With the commencement of the second semester, I intend to synchronise my schedule with the other members’,” Aigis said. “If I were to remain here on standby, it could delay our deployment. Therefore, I request to accompany our squad leader.”

 

“Delay our deployment?” Yukari said. She didn’t seem too enthused. “Won’t you going to school create more problems?”

 

“I will make any necessary adjustments as problems arise.”

 

At that moment, Koromaru barked.

 

“He said, ‘I want to go to school, too.’”

 

Yukari shook her head. “Sorry, Koro-chan, you have to stay here.”

 

Now he whimpered.

 

Kirika knelt beside him. “Don’t worry, buddy, you can spend time with me on my days off,” she said. He wagged his tail again and she smiled. “Yeah, I’ll make sure you’re not always alone.”

 

“Your days off?” Junpei raised an eyebrow. “Do you actually work or something when we’re not around?”

 

“Uhm…” She cleared her throat. “Sanada around?”

 

“No,” Yukari said, going along with the subject change. “Captain of the boxing team had a meeting today.”

 

“Captain of the boxing club? I didn’t know that.”

 

“Oh yeah, he’s incredible,” Junpei said. “He’s never lost a single match.”

 

She shook her head. “Why am I not surprised?” She stood back up. “Well, I’ve been doing readings all day so—”

 

“Readings?” Fuuka said.

 

She paused. “I meant I’ve been reading at that little bookshop in Iwatodai all day.” She shook her head. “See? I can’t even think straight anymore. So, I’m gonna head up to my room.”

 

“Why’d you want to know if Sanada-san was around?” Junpei said with a smug smile as she started walking away.

 

She shrugged her shoulders. “No reason.”

 

That was the end of it. She then made it to the third floor and entered her room. She fell onto her bed with a heavy sigh. And before she knew it, she fell asleep.


	56. September 2nd, 2009

The next day, Kirika left at the same time as the others. Though, Akihiko and Mitsuru had both already taken off.

 

“You excited for your first day, Aigis?” Kirika spoke up.

 

“I am most curious,” she said. “It will be a brand new experience for me.”

 

“How does it feel knowing you’ll be experiencing a school before me?”

 

“I am most indifferent about this circumstance.”

 

She looked to the others, laughing. “Yeah, I don’t really know what answer I was even expecting.”

 

The rest of the trip was spent talking about random things. Junpei actually held up most of the conversations with everyone. Then when they arrived at the school gates, Kirika went to take her leave. Before she had the chance to get far, though, there was a hand on her shoulder and a jolt of electricity down her spine.

 

“Hey, stranger,” she said with a smile. Idun fluttered within her.

 

Akihiko returned the smile. “Yo. Sorry I missed you last night.”

 

“Not a big deal. I mean, you could make up for it this afternoon.”

 

“Oh yeah? How’s that?”

 

“Simple. I’ll meet you outside the gates when school gets out and we can grab a bit to eat together.”

 

“Wish I could, but I have other plans.”

 

“Oh? Boxing captain have a meet?”

 

“Damn. So, my secret is out, huh?”

 

She laughed. “Yeah, you were outed yesterday.”

 

“Well, no, I don’t have a meet today.”

 

“Then what’s up?”

 

“There’s just…something I need to do.”

 

“Hmm. Would you like support?”

 

“I appreciate the offer, but you don’t have to worry about it.”

 

“Are you sure?”

 

He nodded. “Yeah.”

 

She paused. “Aki—”

 

Before she could finish, the bell rang.

 

“Guess that’s my cue,” he said, already walking backwards towards the school. “I’ll see you later tonight.”

 

“Later.”

 

He turned around and finished walking away, and she watched him until he disappeared inside the school. Then she took a deep breath and continued her way to Paulownia Mall. And the entire time she tried to ignore how disappointed Idun felt.

 

The rest of the day seemed to pass by at an incredibly slow pace. She spent a good portion of her morning at the mall. She started at the café and made her way around the different shops. Then she made her way back into Iwatodai where she explored the shops at the strip mall. Once again, she avoided stopping to get food at any point during the day.

 

By six o’clock, she finally decided to head back to the dorm. She entered to find only her Kohai, Aigis, and Koromaru in the lounge.

 

“Welcome back,” Fuuka greeted her. “How was your day?”

 

“Slow,” Kirika said. “Just you guys around again?”

 

“No, Mitsuru-san and Akihiko-san are here,” Yukari said. “They’re just upstairs with our newest member.”

 

“Another new member?”

 

“Yes and no,” Junpei said. “He used to be a part of the team and now he’s rejoined.”

 

Kirika froze. “I’m sorry, what?”

 

“Yeah,” Yukari said. “He actually showed up at the back alley that night the three of us were there.”

 

“Same guy?”

 

Junpei nodded. “Same guy.”

 

“And they’re upstairs?”

 

“Second floor,” Fuuka said.

 

Huh. Kirika pursed her lips, holding back a smirk. _That son of a bitch. After all the stupid bullshit excuses he made_ —Without saying another word, she made her way upstairs. About halfway up, she started hearing voices…

 

“I’ve been waiting for this day, Shinji,” Akihiko said. “I’m ready for battle right now, in fact.”

 

“Tch. You’re as hot-headed as always,” Shinjiro said.

 

She reached the top of the stairs. “Well, well, what do we have here?”

 

Akihiko stood up almost right away. “Hey, you’re back.” He smiled. “There’s someone I’d like you to meet.”

 

“No need for introductions,” she said before looking over at the other. “So, what changed your mind, Aragaki? Finally come to an _understanding_?”

 

He rolled his eyes at her. “Aki wouldn’t take no for an answer this time.”

 

“Good for him.”

 

Mitsuru looked back and forth between the two of them. “So…you two know each other already?”

 

“I spent enough time on the streets.” She gestured her head towards the brunette. “I was bound to come across this prick sooner or later.”

 

Akihiko looked almost disheartened. “Do you not get along?”

 

“We have our moments.”

 

Shinjiro shook his head at her. “Let’s just say we know how to be civil with one another and leave it at that.”

 

Mitsuru folded her arms across her chest. “Sounds familiar.”

 

“Huh?”

 

“Nishioka said the same thing about herself and Akihiko.”

 

“Tch. Of course she did.”

 

Shinjiro glanced up at Kirika, and she shot back with a look that read _one and the same_. He must’ve understood her silent communication, for he shook his head at her again.

 

“Wait,” Akihiko spoke up. “How long ago did you meet each other?”

 

“Back in May,” Kirika said.

 

He grinned at this. “So, you met me first.”

 

Now Shinjiro rolled his eyes at him. “C’mon, you seriously gotta turn even that into a competition?”

 

“Please, he _has_ to turn everything into a game or a competition,” Kirika said. “For the record, though, I wasn’t very fond of either of you when I first met you both.”

 

Akihiko chuckled. “I wasn’t too fond of you, either.”

 

Shinjiro scoffed. “I still ain’t fond of her.”

 

“Yeah, that’s why you’re always looking out for me,” she said.

 

“Tch. Whatever.”

 

“Either way, welcome back, Aragaki.” She took a deep breath, shrugging her shoulders at the same time. “Well, I’m tired, so I’m gonna turn in early.” And she started walking away.

 

“Did you eat today?” Shinjiro said over his shoulder.

 

She paused. “Shit, now I’m gonna have both of you nagging me. Ugh.”

 

“I’ll take that as a no.”

 

“Take it however you want. Don’t make a difference”

 

“It’s still early,” Akihiko went on. “We could go out now if—”

 

“Like I said, I’m tired.” She looked back at them and smiled. “Goodnight.”

 

He smiled almost sheepishly. “Goodnight.”

 

Kirika then took her leave. And when she arrived in her room, she slid down her door and to the floor before she could make it to her bed. Based on Idun’s prolonged tantrum, she could tell it was going to be a restless night.


	57. September 3rd, 2009

Kirika had been right. 1:30 in the morning and she still wasn’t asleep. She couldn’t sleep. Bad dreams. The Dark Hour didn’t help, either. Rather than staying in bed, though, she decided she would head down to the lounge. Maybe step outside for some fresh air.

 

When she reached the first floor landing, she didn’t bother turning any lights on. There was enough light shining into the dorm from the almost-full moon. Only a couple more days now…

 

She stepped up to the front door and put her hand on the knob. She had every intention to turn it, but a hand on her shoulder stopped her.

 

“I’m not running,” she said, her voice soft. “Just wanted some fresh air.”

 

“How about some tea instead?” Shinjiro said.

 

“I guess that’ll suffice.”

 

So, she took a seat on the couch and remained silent while he prepared the tea. He brought the pot over and placed it on the table once it was finished.

 

“I had a feeling you’d be awake,” he said.

 

“What changed your mind?”

 

He sighed. “I already told you…”

 

“There’s more to it than just that, though. There has to be.”

 

“Aki let me know that the kid joined the team.”

 

“So, you decided to come back?”

 

“Can’t run from my past forever, right?”

 

“You sure as hell can try.”

 

“You won’t get far.”

 

“If that’s what you believe then you don’t know me at all.” She looked up at him. “You’re underestimating my abilities.”

 

“And you’re underestimating the past’s ability to catch up with you.”

 

She sighed, turning her gaze away again. “It’s been six frigging years.”

 

“Only two for me.”

 

“Exactly. You’ve stayed in one place and it still took that long.”

 

“But you’ve come full circle.” He leaned forward to pour the tea. “The head has caught the tail.” He handed her a cup.

 

She accepted the cup and took a small sip. “Don’t matter. I’m leaving once this is all over and done with.”

 

“And where do you plan on going?”

 

She shrugged. “Anywhere.”

 

“You’re still walking with a limp here and there. Don’t think I haven’t noticed. So, you’re probably not in good enough condition to take off. I don’t think your hip will be able to carry you very far.”

 

“I wasn’t shot in the hip; I was shot in—”

 

“Same difference. Pain travels.”

 

“Whatever.” Another sip. “Not like I’m leaving tonight or next week. I got a few more months to give it a chance to heal more. And I’ve been running around just fine, for the record.”

 

“You’re ridiculous.”

 

“Why? What is so ridiculous about wanting to get out of here? About not wanting to stay in one place?”

 

“The whole concept is ridiculous.”

 

“Tch.”

 

He paused, taking a sip of his tea. “I can already tell the group depends on you. Especially Aki.”

 

“I’ve told him not to.”

 

“That ain’t gonna stop him.” Another pause. “C’mon, there has to be at least one thing in this city that would change your mind and make you stay.”

 

“There isn’t.”

 

“Bullshit.”

 

“It’s the truth.”

 

“Then why the hell have you stuck around for this long?” he said. She opened her mouth to respond, but stopped when she realised she was at a loss for the proper comeback. She swallowed hard, jaw clenched. He smirked. “Exactly. Idun brought you back here for a reason—you’ve said so yourself—and I’m sure it was a damn good one.”

 

“Yeah, to help with this damn fight. And she ain’t even a fighter.”

 

“No, she’s a protector. And sometimes defence is more important than offence.”

 

“Except I’m really not that useful.”

 

“Are you kidding me? I’ve seen firsthand what you’re capable of. So, don’t sell yourself short.”

 

She took a sip of her tea. “Don’t be a hypocrite.”

 

He paused mid-sip. Then he swallowed hard before putting the cup down for a refill. “So…everyone knows about Strega now, huh?”

 

“Oh.” She shook her head, a little taken aback by the subject change. “Yeah, Takaya and Jin showed up during the last full moon,” she then said as she put her own cup down as well. “They’ve officially become our enemies.”

 

He refilled her cup, too. “They couldn’t have been too pleased when they saw you.”

 

“Not really.” Another sip. “And now Takaya wants to correct his mistake, so that should go over well.”

 

He chuckled. “He shouldn’t be able to touch you now that you have an Evoker and can easily summon Idun.”

 

“You would think so.”

 

Now his he furrowed his brow.  “Don’t do anything stupid.”

 

“But I always do something stupid.”

 

“Exactly.”

 

She couldn’t hold back the smile. “You don’t have to worry about me.” The smile quickly fell away. “You still buying those pills from them?” She looked over at him to see that he had turned his gaze down. “Why?”

 

“You haven’t told Aki about that?”

 

“How could I have when he only just found out we know each other?”

 

“Right.”

 

“Besides, I figured you could tell him and disappoint him yourself.”

 

“Oh, thanks.”

 

“You’re very welcome.” She smiled again before yawning. “Holy shit…”

 

“You should get back to bed.”

 

“I ain’t tired.”

 

“Sure.”

 

They fell silent as they continued drinking the tea. No sound, save a gentle _slurp_ here and there. Once Kirika finished her second cup, she placed it on the table and leaned into Shinjiro, resting her head on his shoulder.

 

“The hell do you think you’re doing?” he said.

 

“Accept it,” she said.

 

“Get away from me.” He shrugged her off of him. “And stay away from me.”

 

“Are you telling me to screw off?”

 

“No, just don’t touch me.”

 

She laughed again. “Fair enough.”

 

“Besides, I don’t want Aki getting the wrong idea.”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

He shook his head. “Nothing.”

 

“No, what did you mean by that?”

 

“You ain’t gotta worry about it.”

 

“Fine,” she said. She wasn’t in the mood to argue. Not this late at night. “The Lost are increasing yet again,” she changed the subject.

 

“I’ve noticed,” he said. “Full moon coming up.”

 

“Yeah. I wonder what’ll happen this time around.”

 

“No matter what, the team is gonna need you.”

 

Kirika quickly glanced up at Shinjiro before allowing her gaze to fall back down. And with that, they fell silent again. Neither of them were sure how much time had passed, but it soon began to pass with idle chatter. Voices soft. Atmosphere comfortable.

 

Before she even knew it, she had fallen asleep. Then when she woke up only a mere few hours later, she smiled when she found she was safe and warm in her bed. And despite the lack of sleep, she felt ready for the day ahead of her.


	58. September 5th, 2009

It was the night of the full moon. Kirika wasted her morning at the café and record shop, trying to keep her mind off things. It had been a failed attempt. When she returned to the dorm, she headed straight for her room. She would calm herself down one way or another before the Dark Hour.

 

Next thing she knew, though, Akihiko was retrieving her to join the team up on the fourth floor.

 

“Tonight marks the sixth full moon,” the Chairman said. “Do you detect a Shadow?”

 

“Yes,” Fuuka said. “It’s near Paulownia Mall…I think.”

 

“You think?” Mitsuru said.

 

“For some reason, I can’t pinpoint its location. But I’m trying to narrow it down…”

 

“Is that its power?” Akihiko said.

 

“I don’t know.”

 

“We have enough to go on,” Shinjiro spoke up.

 

Just then, Ken rushed into the Command Room.

 

“Did you find Iori?” Mitsuru said.

 

Ken shook his head. “I can’t find him anywhere. His backpack isn’t here, so I don’t think he’s come home yet.”

 

Yukari sighed. “That idiot… He knows tonight’s the night.”

 

“I don’t sense him anywhere nearby,” Fuuka said. “Should I take more time to look for him, just in case?”

 

“No, it’s okay,” the Chairman said. “You’re all young. Sometimes you just get in one of those moods. Anyway, we should focus on the task at hand.”

 

Shinjiro glanced over at Kirika and she shot him back an indignant look. “Excuse me?” she spoke up. “We’re gonna dismiss his absence? Just like that?”

 

“I understand your concern, but we can’t afford to waste any more time,” Mitsuru said. “Let’s go.”

 

With that, they made their way for Paulownia Mall. As they neared the Moonlight Bridge, Shinjiro fell to back of the group with Kirika, nudging her arm with his elbow.

 

“Hey, I didn’t think you did the bridge,” he spoke up.

 

“I’ve had to sorta force myself over it since I joined the group,” she said. “After all, there’s no other way to get to Tartarus once the Dark Hour’s begun.”

 

“Good. It was childish of you to be afraid of it.”

 

“Shut up. I ain’t afraid of it. Idun just doesn’t pick up a good vibe from it.”

 

“Whatever.”

 

She pushed him away from her, though she was chuckling a bit. “C’mon, stop being such an ass.”

 

Just then, Akihiko joined them. “Ready?”

 

“As I’ll ever be.” She took a deep breath. “Okay. Tell me about…your very first boxing match, Mr. Undefeated.”

 

He smiled almost bashfully as he began telling the story as soon as they started crossing the bridge. Kirika did as she always did: closed her eyes and focused on the sound of Akihiko’s—as much as she’d hate to admit—comforting voice. Though, she could sense Shinjiro watching them, which was causing her cheeks to flush. Deep. Then again, it ended up being another thing to keep her mind off the bridge. And once they made it all the way across, Akihiko smiled again before catching up with the others.

 

Shinjiro raised an eyebrow. “The hell was that about?”

 

“What? He told me a story.”

 

“I get that. But why?”

 

“It’s sort of our, uhm,” she cleared her throat, “system…to get me across.” She willed the blush out of her cheeks.

 

“You two have a system?”

 

“I focus on his story, so I don’t focus on the bridge.” She paused. “Or Idun focuses on the story. I don’t really care about—” He chuckled under his breath at this, and she pursed her lips. “Shut up.”

 

Soon enough, they arrived at Paulownia Mall.

 

“Detect anything?” Mitsuru spoke up.

 

“Only a faint presence,” Fuuka said. “It seems so close, but… Why?”

 

“All right, let’s split up and search for it. There’s no time to lose. Hurry.”

 

Some of the group began to disperse at these orders.

 

“Wait,” Fuuka stopped them. “Please, give me a moment. This is my responsibility.”

 

“By all means…” Kirika said.

 

At that, Fuuka began to concentrate attentively. “Tell me, Lucia…what is this thing that deceives me? Hear the wind’s answer in your ear. Touch the earth’s answer with your fingertips. Taste the water’s answer on your lips…”

 

“Hey, is she okay?” Akihiko spoke up.

 

“Don’t break her concentration,” Mitsuru said.

 

“Right beneath our feet…” Fuuka went on. “Some kind of…webbing?”

 

“Perhaps it has something to do with the old power cables underground,” Aigis said. “They were just left there when the island’s construction was completed.”

 

“Power cables?” Mitsuru said.

 

“Yes. They run underground in many directions, like a web.”

 

Akihiko’s brow furrowed. “And they’re interfering with her ability?”

 

“Thank you, Aigis,” Fuuka said. “I understand now. Interference isn’t the problem. The cables themselves have been possessed by the Shadow.”

 

Yukari’s eyes widened. “They what? So…it’s underneath this whole area?”

 

“Now it all makes sense,” Akihiko said.

 

“H-how are we supposed to beat something like that?” Ken said.

 

Shinjiro cocked his head to the side. “Tch.”

 

“This is a problem,” Mitsuru said. “We have no means of attacking it.”

 

Kirika shook her head. “No, there has to be a main source that’s accessible to us.”

 

“She’s right about that,” Fuuka said. “In your notes from previous battles, it said there was a Shadow that took control of the monorail. Just like that one, this Shadow must have its own body. Let me see if I can find it…”

 

“Even if we know where it is, we might not be able to get to it,” Akihiko said.

 

“There may still be a way to reach the structure the buried cables feed into,” Aigis said.

 

“We’ll see,” Shinjiro said.

 

Yukari seemed to be growing more nervous. “Fuuka…”

 

Still concentrating attentively, Fuuka began to gasp. “I found it. It’s close by… In this mall.”

 

Yukari’s eyes widened again. “In here?”

 

Fuuka nodded. “It’s inside a small chamber underground. It’s rectangular, so I assume it’s manmade.”

 

“Is it some sort of room?” Ken said.

 

“Wait a minute…” Shinjiro thought for moment. “I overheard the manager of Escapade… He was saying that the power’s been acting up lately.”

 

“That’s no surprise,” Yukari said.

 

“He said the control panel is located beneath the club. Maybe we should take a look.”

 

“That’s it,” Fuuka said.

 

“Good job, Yamagishi,” Mitsuru said. “All right, once we’re ready, we’ll make our move.”

 

With that, the group prepared for battle. And when the smaller team made their way for the source, Kirika joined Fuuka by her side. Her mind wasn’t all there, though; Idun was still concerned for Junpei. Something felt seriously wrong…

 

“Nishioka,” she suddenly heard a voice say. “Takeba is in trouble.” She recognised it as Mitsuru’s. “Help her.”

 

Her eyes widened as she snapped back into the moment. She pulled out her Evoker and summoned Idun just in time to cover Yukari from what very well could’ve been a fatal attack. Idun healed her, and then returned to Kirika. She slumped over in exhaustion and Akihiko knelt beside her.

 

“Are you okay?” he checked.

 

“Yeah…sorry…”

 

He helped her back to her feet, keeping a hand on her back for the rest of the battle, which put Idun at ease. Though, Kirika’s mind still wasn’t all there.

 

“Congratulations, I no longer sense its presence,” Fuuka said at last. “Oh, and also…I think I’ve found Junpei. He’s back at the dorm, but something seems strange. The Chairman’s there, too, so he should be okay. But let’s hurry back just in case.”

 

And that’s what they did; they rushed back to the dorm. And with each step closer, Idun grew more and more panicked. Then, when they arrived at the dorm, they split up. Kirika and Yukari both made their way for the rooftop, bursting through the door.

 

“Junpei,” Yukari called out.

 

There he was, hands tied behind his back. Except he wasn’t alone.

 

“Tch. They’re back already,” the redheaded girl said.

 

Kirika recognised her as the third member of Strega. And when the girl pulled out her Evoker and put it to her head, she moved in front of Yukari and followed suit.

 

“Medea, come…” she said.

 

Before anything else could happen, though, Junpei broke free. “Chidori, stop,” he said as he practically tackled the girl to the ground, knocking her Evoker out of her hand.

 

“No. Give it back,” she said.

 

That was when the rest of the group showed up, along with the Chairman.

 

The Chairman’s eyes were wide. “Hmm? When did she—?”

 

“Sorry,” Akihiko said as he picked up the lost Evoker, “but we can’t let you use this.”

 

“Medea…” Chidori said.

 

“I—I didn’t sense her up until this very moment,” Fuuka said, defeated. “This is my only power and yet…”

 

“Don’t beat yourself up over it,” Kirika said, still gripping her own Evoker tightly.

 

“If even Fuuka couldn’t sense her presence, then she must have some sort of power to conceal her presence…” the Chairman said. “I didn’t have the slightest clue she was here.”

 

Kirika held back the urge to roll her eyes at his comment. _Yeah, sure. Play clueless_. Aigis then walked over to Junpei and Chidori, taking hold of her for him.

 

“Are you a member of the group that goes by the name Strega?” Mitsuru said. “I have a number of questions for you.”

 

“I’m not…afraid…of dying…” Chidori said.

 

“Ch-Chidori?” Junpei said.

 

“Medea…I’m…”

 

“Clearly she’s emotionally unstable,” Mitsuru said. “We’ll let her rest and save our questions for later.”

 

Junpei looked down. “Chidori…”

 

They all went back inside the dorm. Akihiko, Mitsuru, and Aigis left to bring Chidori to the hospital, despite the fact that it was still the Dark Hour.

 

As for Kirika, she was still clenching her Evoker in her hand. Then there was hand on her shoulder and she relaxed almost instantaneously.

 

“You can put it away now,” Shinjiro said.

 

She looked over at him, taking a deep breath. “I knew we shouldn’t have dismissed his absence just like that. Idun knew something was gonna go wrong tonight.” She shook her head. “As for the Chairman—”

 

“Put it away,” he said.

 

She swallowed hard but did as she was told. He then sent her off to her bedroom, and she continued to listen. The Dark Hour wasn’t over just yet, but that didn’t keep the exhaustion from taking over every inch of her body.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly, I can't believe we're halfway through this story already. I mean, I feel like I just started posting it maybe a week or two ago, haha  
> Either way, thanks to everyone who has stuck with it (and me) thus far. It's greatly appreciated :3  
> The end will be here before we know it!!


	59. September 6th, 2009

The next day, Kirika found herself at the hospital along with Akihiko and Mitsuru. They were in Chidori’s room, attempting to interrogate her.

 

“I’ll ask you once more,” Mitsuru said, “is Chidori your real name?” she finished her first question. “What kind of organisation is Strega? Are there others besides you three?” When she didn’t respond, she sighed out of frustration.

 

“C’mon, Kirijo, the hell were you expecting? A full confession?” Kirika shook her head. “I’m telling you, she ain’t gonna talk.”

 

“She has to speak eventually.”

 

“Patience is key. You can’t force her. Besides, we practically traumatised her last night. So, I don’t really blame her for not wanting to talk with us.”

 

“Hey, wait, Junpei,” they suddenly heard Yukari say from the hall. “You’re not supposed to be here, remember?”

 

Just then, Junpei burst into the room. “Chidori.”

 

Yukari hurried in after him. “Junpei! Uh…sorry. He wouldn’t stop bugging me about this place.”

 

“How are you feeling?” he went on, stepping up to the hospital bed. “Seems like you’ve calmed down.”

 

“She certainly has,” Mitsuru said. “In fact, she won’t say a word.” She paused. “Maybe we should confiscate her sketchbook, too.”

 

“Hey, come on, what good would that do? That won’t make her talk.”

 

“I’m not so sure about that. She was quite upset when we took her Evoker. Speaking of which, where did you get that?”

 

“Medea…” Chidori finally spoke up. “Give it back to me. I want her back.”

 

“Hey, I told you not to bring that up, didn’t I?” Akihiko said.

 

“You certainly did,” Kirika said.

 

“Then what am I supposed to do?” Mitsuru let out another disgruntled sigh. “I’ll have someone else try next time.”

 

“Yukari, call a nurse,” Akihiko said. “We’re done for today. I’ll inform Ikutsuki-san of the difficulties we’re having.”

 

“Why?” Chidori said. “Why did you take it from me? Medea…”

 

“C’mon, Junpei, let’s go,” Yukari said.

 

“Chidori…” Junpei said. “What happened to you?”

 

A nurse arrived, and they all made their way out of the hospital. Junpei went his separate way, while Mitsuru and Yukari decided to head back to the dorm.

 

“You wanna grab a bite to eat?” Akihiko said.

 

Kirika shrugged her shoulders. “Not sure if I can stomach anything at the moment.”

 

“Why not?”

 

“Just…thinking about last night.”

 

“The incident with Chidori or the incident with Yukari?”

 

She sighed. “I don’t know what happened; I was just so out of it. What if Mitsuru hadn’t been able to regain my attention?”

 

“Don’t be so hard on yourself.” He put a hand on her shoulder. “You pulled through and everything was perfectly fine.” He smiled. “Have more faith in yourself.”

 

“Why do you have so much faith in me?”

 

“I trust you.”

 

“The only person you should trust with your own life is yourself.”

 

“Do you trust yourself with your own life?”

 

“Honestly…no, not always.”

 

“Then you can’t say that.” He paused. “C’mon, let’s go.”

 

With that, they made their way for the strip mall. One of them spoke up every so often, but it was an overall quiet walk. Until, that is—

 

“Akihiko-senpai!” a shrill voice said once they stepped off the tram at Iwatodai Station. Two girls came running over to them. “Hi, Senpai!”

 

He chuckled uncomfortably. “Hi…”

 

“Senpai, we were just about to go to the sweets shop,” the second girl said. “Would you like to join us?”

 

“I’m afraid I can’t.”

 

Now the first girl looked more than upset. “Why not?”

 

“Uh…yeah, hi,” Kirika spoke up. “I’m standing here, too.”

 

The second girl pouted. “Senpai, who’s she?”

 

“She’s—uhm…” Akihiko trailed off and looked over at her.

 

Idun was screaming out a certain word, but Kirika refused to use that word aloud. “A better friend to him than either of you are,” she said instead. “Bye.”

 

With that, the two girls walked off, muttering under their breath.

 

“Sorry about that…” Akihiko said.

 

“The hell even was that?” Kirika said. “Of all the times we’ve gone out together, that has never happened.”

 

He shook his head. “It was nothing.”

 

“Who were those girls?”

 

“I dunno. Just two underclassmen.”

 

She gasped, her eyes widened. “Oh my god. You’re an _it_ boy, aren’t you?” She laughed. “Oh my god, I’m out with the _it_ boy.”

 

“Shut up, I am not the _it_ boy.”

 

“Oh, you totally are, though.”

 

“You’re gonna assume that because of two girls?”

 

“Pretty much, yeah.”

 

“Tch. Why do you even know that term?”

 

“Uh, because I ain’t dumb. And because teenage girls talk a lot and they talk loud.” She laughed as she waited for him to make a comeback, but he only sighed. So, she swallowed hard and recomposed herself. “You hate it, don’t you?”

 

“It’s not even a thing. So, can we just go now?”

 

“No, yeah, of course.” She paused. “Sorry…”

 

“Don’t worry about it.” He nudged her when he noticed she still looked guilty, and he grinned. “So, we’re friends, huh?”

 

Her eyes widened, and she felt her cheeks flush instantaneously. She pushed him away from her with a roll of her eyes. “Shut up.” He laughed in response. “No. I only said that to make those chicks leave.”

 

“Oh, r-right. Of course. My—My mistake.” He was still chuckling. “Y’know, it is okay to have friends.”

 

She pursed her lips, running a hand through her hair. _It is okay to have friends_. In a perfect world, maybe. Kirika’s world was far from perfect, though. Far from normal. All those teenage girls she had overheard talking over the years… None of them ever made sense to her. She just never understood the appeal. Hell, in her life, friendships weren’t worth the time or energy. She saw no benefit in personal relationships. So why bother?

 

“Yeah, uhm… I’m really not that hungry after all,” she spoke up.

 

“C’mon—”

 

“Don’t bother.” She walked past him, waving him off. “I’ll just—I’ll see you back at the dorm.”

 

“Good,” he called after her. “Then Shinji can pester you about eating, just like you said would happen.” She stopped in her tracks. “Gonna be either him or me, right?”

 

Damn it. Kirika hated that Akihiko was right. That he was throwing her words back in her face already. She let out a heavy sigh. “Fine.” She walked back over to him. “Guess you are the lesser of two evils.”

 

“I’ll take that as a compliment.”

 

She couldn’t resist the smirk. “It’s the best you’re gonna get.”

 

He returned the smile but didn’t say anything else. Instead, they just entered the ramen shop together and ate in silence. Oddly comfortable silence. Teasing silence. The outside world was silent, at least. Inside Kirika’s chest, though, Idun was screaming. And every time she met Akihiko’s gaze and he smiled at her, the screaming ceased.

 

She was starting to think she could maybe get used to the silence. But getting used to the silence inside her, meant getting used to the white noise of the rest of the world.


	60. September 8th, 2009

A couple days later, Kirika found herself back at the hospital with Akihiko and Mitsuru, visiting Chidori. And this time, they brought along Fuuka as well.

 

“So, Yamagishi, do you sense anything?” Mitsuru said. Fuuka shook her head slowly, and Chidori remained silent. Mitsuru sighed. “By refusing to speak, you’re only hurting yourself. We aren’t keeping you here because we hate you; we just want to avoid unnecessary confrontation.”

 

“I think we may be creating a conflict,” Kirika said under her breath.

 

Junpei entered the room right then. “How’s Chidori?”

 

“Again?” Akihiko said. “What’s your obsession, Junpei?”

 

“Did she say anything?” he went on. Mitsuru shook her head in response. “Can I just talk to her?”

 

“Iori, it seems like you’re letting your emotions get the best of you,” Mitsuru said. “Is everything okay?”

 

“Well…not exactly. I know she attacked me, but I can’t stop thinking about her.”

 

“Junpei-kun…” Fuuka said. She got up, freeing the chair beside the hospital bed.

 

He sat down. “You okay? I’m glad they let you keep your sketchbook. You really do like to draw, huh?”

 

“It doesn’t matter,” Chidori said.

 

Fuuka’s eyes widened a bit. “She spoke.”

 

“No one else but me can understand my pictures.”

 

He then grabbed her hand. “Chidori.”

 

“Tch. Again?” Akihiko said.

 

Kirika rolled her eyes. “Shit…”

 

Junpei began to panic. “Why are you bleeding?”

 

“She does it to herself.” Akihiko sighed out of exasperation. “I thought I had removed all the sharp objects in here.”

 

“Apparently we can’t leave her unattended for even one moment,” Mitsuru said. “But fortunately, she heals at an astounding rate.”

 

“Huh. That makes two of us,” Kirika said.

 

Chidori shook Junpei’s hand away. “Let go of me.”

 

“Then, at the station…” Junpei said in recollection. “You did that to yourself?”

 

“I never asked for your help. You were the one who misunderstood.”

 

“Well, I want you to stop. You can’t be doing that. It’s not right. And I won’t let you.”

 

“The doctor will be here soon,” Mitsuru said. “You two should go now.”

 

“All right,” Fuuka said. “Let’s go, Junpei-kun.”

 

The two of them took their leave without a fight.

 

“So, you seem to have found your voice,” Mitsuru said.

 

“Maybe we should let Iori handle this,” Kirika said. “After all, it seems he’s the only one she’s been willing to converse with.”

 

Akihiko nodded with another sigh. “She has a point.”

 

Mitsuru considered this. “Perhaps. By the way, Nishioka, her abilities do seem quite similar to yours.”

 

“So I’ve noticed.” She paused, her gaze landing on the girl in the hospital bed. “Although, I have a feeling there is a difference. Even if it’s slight.”

 

Kirika took her leave not too long after that. Instead of returning to the dorm, though, she stopped by the mall. She went to the café and sat down for a couple cups of coffee before taking one to-go. Then she crossed over to the record shop to browse the music selection. She wasn’t sure how much time she spent there, but as she walked out, she bumped into Akihiko.

 

“Oh, you didn’t go back to the dorm?” he said.

 

She looked around. “You mean…this isn’t the dorm?”

 

He chuckled, shaking his head at her. “Sarcastic as it may be, it’s good to know you have a sense of humour.” She held back a grin. “Anyway, about what you said earlier…” They stopped and that was when she realised they had already worked their way out of the mall. “Why do you feel your power is different from Chidori’s?”

 

She shrugged her shoulders. “I dunno. It’s literally just a feeling.”

 

“A feeling you get from Idun?”

 

“I guess? I’m really not sure. Something just feels off about Chidori’s Persona. I’m sure I’d get the same feeling from the other two, as well.”

 

“Huh.” He paused, thinking. “Guess we’ll only be able to tell with time.”

 

“Yeah…”

 

“So, uh, do you wanna—?”

 

“Not hungry.” She shook the coffee cup in her hand. “Coffee fills me up.”

 

“Coffee isn’t a meal.”

 

“Do you know who you’re talking to?” Kirika started walking away from Akihiko before he could get another word in. “I’m gonna walk around the city for a while longer. Enjoy the nice weather while we still have it.” She looked over her shoulder. “I’ll catch back up with you at the dorm.”

 

He didn’t try to stop her. But she did try to stop the part of her that felt disappointed by that fact. After all, there was nothing for her to be disappointed about. Nothing…despite Idun’s protests.


	61. September 10th, 2009

Another day at the hospital. Kirika was there—again—with Akihiko and Mitsuru. They were following the same poor routine of trying to get Chidori to speak. She was beginning to go out of her mind over how pointless each attempted interrogation had been. Futile attempts. Ugh… Soon enough, though, Junpei arrived as well.

 

“Yo, Chidorita,” he greeted her.

 

“Don’t call me that,” Chidori said.

 

“C’mon, cheer up.” He smiled. “I brought you a new sketchbook. I thought your old one might be getting full.”

 

“That wasn’t necessary, Junpei.”

 

He took the seat next to her. “Hah, you said my name. I was worried I’d never hear that again.”

 

At that moment, Shinjiro entered the hospital room as well. “Any luck?”

 

“She finally started talking,” Mitsuru said. “But nothing useful yet.”

 

“That’s because she’ll only speak with Iori,” Kirika added.

 

“Well, it’s a start,” Akihiko said. He looked toward the brunette still standing just in front of the doorway. “So, why are _you_ here?”

 

Just then, Chidori’s hands went to her throat as she began to choke.

 

“Chidori?” Junpei said. “Wh-what’s wrong?”

 

She continued making choking noises, keeping her hands at her throat. Then there was a flash of what seemed to be the image of—

 

Mitsuru’s eyes widened. “A Persona…”

 

Shinjiro rolled his shoulders. “Tch.”

 

He made his way over to her and forced something into her mouth. Huh. Kirika could only assume what… Chidori recovered soon after.

 

“Chidori,” Junpei said.

 

“Relax…it happens,” Shinjiro started. “They’re not like us. They can’t fully control their Personas. That’s why they need to take suppressants.” He paused, cocking his head to the side. “To keep their Personas from killing them…”

 

“Suppressants?” Mitsuru said. “You know about Strega?”

 

“You’d be surprised what you can learn on the streets.” He glanced over at Kirika for a brief moment. “I’ll give the doc the right pills. The rest is up to you.” He left.

 

“Shinji, wait,” Akihiko said. “Hey!” And he went after him.

 

Mitsuru paused. “Did you know about this, Nishioka?”

 

Kirika took a deep breath. “I-I should, uh, go make sure they don’t—” She stopped short, as she was now having a hard time breathing herself. She swallowed hard. “Later.”

 

She bolted out of the hospital and went after the other two. When she finally caught up with them, they were already at Port Island Station.

 

“What the hell’s going on?” she heard Akihiko say as she closed in on them. They had finally stopped long enough for her to do so. “Why did you have those pills?” He paused. “I’ve heard about those… They’re taken to suppress a Persona when the user can’t control it. But the side effects…” He closed his eyes in what Kirika could only imagine was an attempt to keep his composure. “You’re not taking them, are you?” Shinjiro’s head was cocked to the side as he held his silence. “Answer me.”

 

“I don’t owe you anything,” Shinjiro finally spoke up.

 

“Tch. The same as always.”

 

“Save it. I’ve heard it all before. You think I’m wasting my power, but you’re just too thick-headed. I’m tired of your damn preaching.”

 

That was when Akihiko punched Shinjiro square in the jaw.

 

Kirika’s eyes widened. “Aki…” She moved closer to them to pull him away, only to be pushed back again. She stumbled, more thrown by Akihiko’s reaction than anything.

 

As for Akihiko, he kept his focus on Shinjiro. “Don’t you get it?” he went on. “You know the reason… Ten years ago. My sister. The fire. I wasn’t strong enough to save her. They held me back, while she—” He stopped, composing himself once more, his hands balled in fists. Shinjiro had reverted to holding his silence. Kirika’s breath caught in her throat, and she felt sick to her stomach. “That’s why I try so hard,” Akihiko still continued. “We promised, remember? To become strong enough to do what we think is right.” Another pause. “So why the drugs? Why didn’t you come talk to me?”

 

“I’m back in the fight now,” Shinjiro said. “So, let it go.”

 

He sighed. “And the side effects?”

 

He paused. “There’s something I need to take care of. It’s something only I can do.”

 

“Like what?”

 

“Listen, don’t worry about me. Just do what you think is right.” He glanced over at Kirika before walking away.

 

That was when Akihiko turned on her. “Did you know?”

 

She stepped away from him, putting her hands up defencively. “Aki—”

 

“Did you know he had those pills?”

 

“I-I didn’t know exactly what they were, so I—”

 

“You should’ve said something to me.”

 

“C’mon, what the hell was I supposed to say?” She sighed, shaking her head. “You didn’t even know I knew him until a week ago. And frankly, I don’t think it would’ve been fair to him if I had told you.”

 

His hands were still balled in fists. “I can’t believe this…”

 

“Aki, please, if I had known what they were, then I would have—”

 

“I don’t wanna hear it.”

 

She paused, wracking her brain for the right words to say. “It—it wasn’t my issue to tell.” Another pause. “I-I don’t know what you expect me to say.”

 

“That’s fine because you don’t have to say anything.”

 

Now she couldn’t help the eyeroll. “Why are you freaking out? I didn’t even do anything wrong. I’m not the one on frigging drugs.”

 

“Tch.”

 

Damn it. Of all the things she could have said, that definitely wasn’t what should’ve come out of her mouth. Akihiko began to walk away, but Kirika’s feet were moving before she even knew what was going on. She got ahead of him, stopping him. And he did actually wait on her, but she was at a loss for words once more. All she knew was that Idun didn’t want her to let him go.

 

“I—I’m sorry.”

 

“Saying sorry doesn’t automatically fix everything.”

 

Kirika knew very well she had no valid response to that. Those still hadn’t been the right words. The proper sentiment. So, she just dropped her head in defeat.

 

This was a turn of events she hadn’t been expecting. A turn of events not even Idun could protect her from.


	62. September 12th, 2009

A couple days later, Kirika found Shinjiro hanging out in the back alley. And this time, she didn’t hesitate to join him. As she stepped up to him, she took the cigarette hanging between his lips and placed it between her own, taking a drag.

 

“The hell you doing here?” he said as she sat down next to him on the steps.

 

She kept her gaze forward as she took another long drag. “Akihiko’s pissed at me, thanks to you.”

 

“What? Why the hell is he pissed at you?”

 

“Because I knew you had those pills, yet I didn’t say anything to him about it.”

 

He sighed. “He ain’t really mad at you. He’s just—”

 

“No, he really is mad. Did you see the way he pushed me?”

 

“Tch. That don’t mean shit. And at least he didn’t hit you.” He rubbed his chin, beneath his swollen lip. “There’s a reason he’s never lost a boxing match.”

 

She tried to smile, but it didn’t last long. “He won’t even acknowledge me.” It took almost everything in her to keep her voice from shaking.

 

“Then you’re right,” Shinjiro took the cigarette back, “he does trust you.”

 

“What—what does that have to do with anything?”

 

“The more he trusts you, the more pissed he gets when he feels like you’ve…betrayed him, for lack of a better word.”

 

“Betrayed? He feels betrayed…?” Her face fell into her hands. “Shit.”

 

“Don’t worry. He’ll come around.”

 

“And if he doesn’t?”

 

“He will.”

 

“Shinji…”

 

He paused. “Since when do you call me—?”

 

“Is that seriously what you’re gonna focus on right now?”

 

“Fine. How can I help, then?” He took a drag. “Do you need me to make him jealous or some stupid shit?”

 

“Why the hell would I need you to do that?”

 

“C’mon, I ain’t oblivious.”

 

“No… Seriously, what are you talking about?”

 

Now he just laughed, shaking his head at her. “Either way, since you’re clearly very upset by this—”

 

“Hey, I am not _very_ upset about it,” she said, denying his mocking tone. “That makes it sound like I have feel—” She stopped when she looked at him and saw that he had raised an eyebrow at her. “Oh, no…no, no.” She shook her head almost so vigorously she feared she was going to give herself whiplash. “No, I do not have any—be-because I don’t do relationships, and—and—and that would be, like, the biggest form of attachment you—you can have to a person, and I—I-I would never—” She stopped again, swallowing hard. She then closed her eyes and clenched her jaw. “I do not feel that way about him.”

 

“Tch. Whatever.”

 

She stole the cigarette back from him. “I don’t.”

 

“Then why are you getting so damn defencive?”

 

“Because that’s kinda what I do.” She took a drag, releasing the smoke as she shook her head. “Why are you even talking about this or bringing this up? I mean, you don’t seem like the type to give a shit—”

 

“Yeah, you don’t think I give a shit about anything, though.”

 

“Am I that far off?”

 

He rolled his eyes. “How does Idun feel?”

 

“She doesn’t feel anything.”

 

“Bullshit.” He sighed when she looked away. “Know how people always say to go with your gut instinct?”

 

“Yeah…”

 

“Well, maybe in our case, our Personas are our gut instincts. Ever think of that?”

 

“Of course I have.” She paused. “Ugh. I cannot believe I am having this conversation with you. Of all frigging people…”

 

“Believe it or not, I do actually care.”

 

“Does that mean you’re gonna stop taking those pills?”

 

“Don’t matter at this point.”

 

“Of course it does.”

 

“No, _Kirika_ , it really doesn’t.”

 

She swallowed hard. “I’m afraid to ask why…”

 

“Then don’t waste your breath.” He stood up, once again taking the cigarette back. He took one last drag before tossing it to the ground. “Let’s head back to the dorm. It’s getting late.”

 

Kirika didn’t say another word. Instead, she just followed him out of the alley and back to the dorm. Once they arrived, she made her way straight for her bedroom. She couldn’t deal to be around people, at the moment. Better yet, Idun couldn’t stand—Ugh. Who the hell was she kidding?

 

She couldn’t stand being ignored by Akihiko.


	63. September 15th, 2009

For the next few days, Kirika tried her best to stay out of the dorm unless she was asleep. So that meant she was spending an extra amount of time around the city doing readings for whoever was willing to pay.

 

Once the sun began to set, she made her way for the mall to stop at the pharmacy. While she was there, she noticed it seemed much busier than usual.

 

“What’s with all the extra business?” she asked the cashier. “I mean, I’ve never seen this many people in here at once.”

 

“Haven’t you heard?” she said. “There’s a typhoon coming. So, people are just prepping themselves.”

 

This caught her attention. “Wait, what? What typhoon?”

 

“Really? It’s only been all over the news for the last few days.”

 

“I don’t watch the news much. Or TV in general, for that matter.”

 

She looked at her with disbelief. “Well, yeah, there is a typhoon set to arrive in just a few days. So, make sure you have coverage.”

 

“Right. Thanks.”

 

That was the end of the conversation. Kirika paid for her items and made her way back to the dorm. As she arrived, Akihiko seemed to be on his way out. He turned and froze when he saw her.

 

She swallowed hard. “Hey.”

 

“Going for a run,” he said back.

 

“Oh. Okay.”

 

He came down the steps and passed her. Before she knew what was going on, she reached for him, taking hold of his hand. As soon as she touched him, though, there was a shock between their fingers that caused them both to let go. Akihiko shook his head, hesitating before he took off running. Kirika shook her hand as well. That had felt different than the times before. The jolts. That was a—

 

“Seriously, Idun? A spark?” She groaned under her breath. She then finally entered the dorm.

 

“Hey,” Shinjiro greeted her. “You just missed Aki.”

 

“Barely,” she said.

 

She made her way for the third floor, but he followed after her.

 

“Maybe you should try actually sitting down and talking to him,” he said. “That might help.”

 

“I can’t do that.”

 

“Why not? That’s what you always did with me.”

 

“No offence, but I didn’t care if I pissed you off or not.”

 

“Point taken.” He paused. “Either way, you can’t let him continue to ignore you.”

 

“I also can’t force him to talk to me.” She sighed. “Y’know, I’m really not in the mood for this right now.”

 

He nodded. “Fine.”

 

“Thanks.”

 

With that, she continued the rest of the way up to the third floor and to her bedroom. She closed the door behind her and took a deep breath. No matter how relaxed she tried to stay, though, Idun wouldn’t have it. All Idun wanted was to go crazy.

 

Just like a typhoon.


	64. September 18th, 2009

A few days later, Kirika found herself back at the mall searching the record shop for some music to listen to. As she was browsing, she heard chatter of dark clouds rolling in. _Shit, that damn typhoon must be starting_. She checked her wristwatch to see that it was a little after two o’clock.

 

She ended up abandoning her music mission just to make her way back to the dorm. The clouds beginning to cover the sky certainly did look ominous. Plus, there was a chill in the air that didn’t accompany just any normal storm. So she picked up her pace. And as soon as she entered the dorm, outside it started to downpour.

 

Koromaru barked at her and ran up to her, wagging his tail. She smiled and knelt beside him to pet him in return.

 

“Good timing, Nishioka-san,” Junpei spoke up.

 

“No kidding,” she said. “I wasn’t expecting it to come all at once like that.” She looked around the dorm. “Aren’t we missing someone? Or is Arisato in his room already?”

 

“He hasn’t made it back yet,” Yukari said.

 

“Don’t you guys get out of school all at the same time? How did he not make it back the same time as the rest of you?”

 

Just then, Minato entered the dorm and he was soaking wet.

 

“Oh, you poor thing,” Kirika said, though she found herself trying not to laugh.

 

“You weren’t quick enough, huh?” Junpei said.

 

Everyone then gathered around the couches.

 

“According to the news, a typhoon just hit,” Fuuka started. “Supposedly, it’s the biggest one on record. It’s moving slowly, too, so it’ll be around for a while…”

 

“Yeah, thanks to that, the school festival got canned,” Junpei said. “Well, setting all that stuff up is a pain, so I don’t mind. But it sucks that we’ll be stuck indoors.” He shrugged his shoulders. “So how are you gonna spend your break?”

 

“Nothing special,” Minato said.

 

“Seriously? Dude, you’re killing me…” He shook his head. “What about you, Fuuka?”

 

“Me? The only thing I plan to do is go to the movies.”

 

“Oh, a movie? Is it a date?”

 

“It’s—it’s not like that. I’m going with Natsuki-chan. She absolutely loves movies. But with this typhoon, I don’t know if we’ll be able to go.”

 

“How about you, Yuka-tan? Will you still have practice?”

 

“I doubt it. The archery range is outside, so it’s most likely cancelled until the storm blows over.”

 

“Same here,” Akihiko said. “This stupid typhoon is gonna mess up my training.”

 

“What about you, Senpai?” Junpei went on.

 

“I haven’t decided,” Mitsuru said. “Besides, what business is it of yours, Iori?”

 

“Me?” He shrugged his shoulders almost smugly. “Well, I’d be happy to tell you about my plans…”

 

“I suspect that you will be visiting Chidori-san,” Aigis said. “Although, she has stabilised, we cannot release her.”

 

“Man, Ai-chan, you must be psychic. And you know what? She _wants_ me to come.” He smiled. “Not to brag or anything. I, uhm, just thought I should check up on her. You know, with the storm and all.”

 

“What’s up with him?” Akihiko said.

 

“Uhm…” Fuuka thought for a moment. “Well…oh yeah! Ken-kun, what are you going to do during the break?”

 

“Oh, nothing in particular,” Ken said.

 

“Come on, you have to be doing something,” Junpei said.

 

“Well, I’ll probably go visit the Shrine.”

 

“Dude, you’re a kid, not an old man.”

 

“But that’s where I always go.” His gaze fell to the floor. “I guess you could say I made a vow…” He paused. “Anyway, I’m going back to my room. I have a lot of homework to do.”

 

“Oh, okay. Call me if you get stuck.”

 

With that, Ken left. Kirika noticed Akihiko and Shinjiro exchange glances, and she took a deep breath. She had a feeling there was a deeper meaning to that so-called vow Amada had made. She couldn’t focus on that right now, though, so she shook her head.

 

“Arisato, you should probably go change into something dry,” she spoke up. “Otherwise you’re risking getting sick.”

 

Minato nodded before also heading upstairs.

 

One by one, the others began to make their way up to their bedrooms. After Minato had left, he never ended up coming back down. From there, Fuuka headed up to her room. Then Yukari. Then Mitsuru and Aigis. Then Akihiko. That left only Kirika, Shinjiro, and Koromaru. The Shiba Inu was already fast asleep, though.

 

“C’mon, we should get to bed, too,” Shinjiro said as he put his book down and got ready to head upstairs.

 

“I’ll turn in later,” Kirika said.

 

“You know you really can’t go anywhere with this storm, right?”

 

“I’m not planning on going anywhere.”

 

“Hmm. Fine. Night.”

 

“G’night.”

 

He left and she remained put. It was nearly ten o’clock by this point.

 

After sitting alone for a little while, she got up and decided to make some tea. She didn’t know why she wasn’t tired, but she wasn’t. She actually felt more awake now than she had in quite some time. She thought back to instances when she wasn’t able to sleep for days on end. Her longest streak was ninety-six hours. Four days. She was fifteen and had been traveling through a small town with a bad reputation. She shuddered at the thought and went on thinking about what she was doing in the present moment. Making tea. She was making tea in a nice dorm. She had a roof over her head, shielding her from the storm raging outside.

 

It was pretty incredible how much things had changed.

 

Once the tea was done, she returned to her spot on the couch. She curled up and grabbed one of the books Mitsuru was always reading. She was getting sick of the damn tabloids anyway. They were mindless, and she knew that, but damn it, all they ever talked about was Apathy Syndrome. And that wasn’t what she wanted to read about.

 

Time passed as she absorbed herself in the book. Before she knew it, she had fallen asleep. It wasn’t restful, though, nor did it last very long. She awoke with a start, stumbling off the couch and hitting the floor with a hard _thump_. It awoke Koromaru, who was on her in an instance.

 

“I’m okay, boy,” she said as she petted him to calm him down. “Just a little jump scare. Nothing to worry about.” After a few more pats to the head, he curled back up and fell asleep again.

 

And as soon as Kirika settled with reality long enough to get her wits about her, the lights went out. She froze. Power outage. She looked at her wristwatch to check the time and that was when she remembered. Dark Hour.

 

She lifted herself off the floor and took a moment on the edge of the couch. If it weren’t for those godforsaken dreams… She shook her head as she picked the discarded book up from off the floor, placing it on the table. She then returned the tea kettle to the dorm’s makeshift kitchen. And when she returned to the couch, she noticed she was shivering. Well, that shouldn’t have been surprising, considering the heat’s tendency to shut down along with the lights. Still, it sure was an inconvenience. And she knew she could’ve gone up to bed now, but she still didn’t want to. Besides, she never could fall back asleep after having those dreams. Nightmares.

 

Next thing she knew, someone was draping a blanket over her shoulders. She grabbed it and held it close, and then looked over to see Akihiko walking around the couch to join her. Idun fluttered within her.

 

“What are you doing up?” she said, trying to keep her voice soft.

 

“I can’t usually sleep during the Dark Hour,” he said. “It’s almost like an internal clock. I always wake up as soon as it starts.”

 

“Oh. Well, uhm…thank you.”

 

“I thought I heard something fall, so I figured I’d check it out.”

 

“Sorry, I get a little clumsy from time to time.”

 

He paused. He seemed to be shaking, but not from the cold. “I, uhm…I-I didn’t mean to push you like that the other day.”

 

“No, I-I know. I shouldn’t have interfered anyway.”

 

“And about what you heard…”

 

“I didn’t say anything because I didn’t wanna pry. Plus, your past is none of my business. I have no right asking for an explanation.”

 

He paused. “So, I never did tell you about my sister, huh?”

 

She shook her head, swallowing hard. “No.”

 

He took a deep breath. “Her name was Miki. She was a couple years younger than Shinji and myself, but she was also the only kid her age at the orphanage, so she was always hanging out and running around with the two of us.” His face darkened. “I’ve always hated the fact that she never got the childhood she deserved. And the fact that I never got the chance to watch her grow up.” His expression then turned to one of defeat. “It was ten years ago… There was a fire at the orphanage and…she got trapped inside. I tried running back in to help her—to get her out—but I was held back. So, I was forced to just sit and watch while she—” He choked on the words. “That’s the real reason why I have such an obsession with training and becoming stronger. I want to make sure that never happens again. I need to make sure I’ll be able to protect and save the people I care about most.” He finally looked up at her. “You must understand that…”

 

“You’d think I would,” she said, smiling sheepishly. “But that’s exactly why I don’t allow myself to grow attached to people. That way if someone were to die…it wouldn’t hurt as much. I won’t be as affected by it. I’ll be able to just move on with my own life.”

 

“Yeah, you had mentioned that.”

 

“Yeah…”

 

“So, you’d rather be emotionless?”

 

For some reason, that comment stung. “I’d rather not deal with grief.”

 

“Hmm. You knew your parents, didn’t you?”

 

“Excuse me?”

 

“Sorry, that came out wrong.” He paused, collecting his thoughts. “What I meant was that you—you got to know your parents, didn’t you? Like, my earliest memories are just of the orphanage, so I never got the chance to actually meet my parents.”

 

“Oh… Yeah, I guess. I mean, my parents didn’t die until I was eleven, so I was old enough to remember them, for the most part.”

 

He raised an eyebrow. “For the most part?”

 

“Well, they weren’t really around much to begin with, so…” She shrugged her shoulders. “Either way, I’m sorry to hear about your sister.”

 

“Yeah, I still have a hard time thinking about her. Honestly, I even try to forget about her. Sometimes I just think that would be so much easier.”

 

“No, what would be easier is not having an emotional attachment to anyone in the first place.”

 

“Tch. Okay. I guess I can see where you’re coming from, after all.”

 

The two of them then fell silent for a while, nothing but the sounds of the storm filling the greenish atmosphere. Kirika looked towards Koromaru, still sound asleep. Then she looked over to the window.

 

“Have you ever witnessed a storm during the Dark Hour?”

 

“Can’t say I have,” Akihiko said, following her gaze out the window.

 

“It’s eerily beautiful.”

 

She looked back to him and saw that he was shaking again, but this time it was from the cold.

 

“Here,” she said. She slid closer to him, opening the blanket. “It is yours after all.”

 

He smiled. “Thanks.”

 

He took the half of the blanket she had offered him and wrapped it around himself. Now they were sitting close enough together so their knees and shoulders were touching. Then when their fingers brushed together, there was another shock.

 

“S-sorry,” he said. “That’s the second time now.”

 

For a moment, she couldn’t think of why he would be apologising. Then she recalled that his Persona’s abilities included electricity. Huh. So maybe Idun hadn’t caused the spark before. Maybe—

 

“Kiri…” he spoke up again, his voice soft.

 

The use of a nickname caught her off guard. “Y-yeah?” She took her gaze of their hands to look up at him.

 

He took a deep breath before he began to lean in closer to her, and she felt as if she was holding her breath now. First their foreheads touched. Spark. Then their noses touched. Spark. The only things left to connect were their—

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gotta love those cliffhangers ;3


	65. September 19th, 2009

—Just then, all the lights came back on. The Dark Hour was over. Kirika remembered to breathe as she returned to her senses. She swiftly moved away from Akihiko.

 

“I-I can’t,” she said, letting the blanket fall away from her. “I’m sorry, I just—”

 

“Does it have to do with Shinji?”

 

Her eyes widened a bit. “W-what? No. Oh, god, no, it—It’s nothing like that. There is nothing between me and Shinji. And I mean, that—that’s actually part of it. The fact that I don’t—I don’t…do relationships or—”

 

“Emotional attachments,” he said, looking down. “Right.”

 

She swallowed hard. “Trust me, Aki, at this point I’m looking after you more than I’m looking after myself. Okay? This is to protect you. It wouldn’t be fair, otherwise.”

 

He stood up, still not looking at her. “You don’t have to explain yourself to me.”

 

“C’mon, you have to keep in mind that I won’t even be sticking around. I mean, once all this is over, I’m—I’m gone. I’ll be leaving.”

 

“Maybe I could go with you.” His voice was low.

 

“What?”

 

“Yeah. I’ll be graduating by the end of this semester anyhow. Then I’ll be off to college, so maybe wherever I go to school could be where you run off to next.”

 

“Aki, c’mon, you still barely know me.” he shook her head at him. “Please…please, don’t try to plan a future with someone like me.”

 

“Someone like you?”

 

Now she glanced up to meet his eye. “A flight risk.”

 

His gaze fell back down as he swallowed hard. Her breath caught in her throat and she stood up and walked away from him. There was nothing left for her to say. No words of comfort. All that was left were two people who couldn’t get what they wanted.

 

Each other.

 

Worse yet, she couldn’t for the life of her figure out when the hell that happened. When did she start wanting to be with Akihiko? How could that have happened without her realising it? How could an attachment like that have slipped past Idun? Unless, of course, Idun let it develop on purpose. Why, though? Why now? Why him? Why at all?

 

Kirika made it to her bedroom and leaned against the door once it was latched. She then squeezed her eyes shut. “Don’t do it,” she said. “Don’t do it, Idun. You know better than that.” She slid down to the floor, trying hard to keep her breathing steady. “Don’t…”

 

She heard footsteps outside her door. When she did, she held her breath. The weight of the steps lingered for a moment, but then disappeared back down the hallway. Quietly, she opened her door just a crack to peak outside. She caught a glimpse of a head of white hair turning the corner to go back down the stairwell. She silently closed the door again and reverted to leaning against it.

 

“This isn’t us, Idun,” she said. “Don’t change now.”

 

She ended up falling asleep in that spot, murmuring to herself. Then she woke up when she heard a knock on the door. She practically jumped awake, too. She checked the time to see that it was already 12:30 in the afternoon. There was another knock. She scrambled to her feet to open it.

 

“Shinji,” she said. She rubbed her eyes. “The hell do you want?”

 

“Are you seriously just waking up?” Shinjiro said from the other side of the doorway, hands in his pockets, as always. “How late did you stay up last night?”

 

“Only till around midnight.”

 

“Before the Dark Hour midnight, or after the Dark Hour midnight?”

 

“After…”

 

He shook his head at her. “You’re ridiculous.”

 

“Did you come up here for a legitimate reason or not?”

 

“I came up here to make sure you weren’t knocked out or some shit. You don’t typically sleep in this late. Even when you’ve stayed up well past the Dark Hour.”

 

“Well, as you can see, I’m perfectly fine.”

 

Without another word, she started closing the door. He put his hand and foot out to stop it, though. He then pushed it back open, and she stumbled back at the force.

 

“As you can see, I ain’t buying it,” he said.

 

She shook her head. “What do you even care?” He sighed, looking away. That was when she understood. “Akihiko spoke with you, didn’t he?”

 

“Not exactly.”

 

Now she was confused. “Then what the hell are you referring to?”

 

“He didn’t talk to me, but I may have overheard part of the conversation you two had last night.”

 

“Then why are you questioning how late I stayed up when you already know how late I stayed up?”

 

“Shut up, that ain’t the point.”

 

“Well, I’m not talking to you about this.” She paused. “Hold on, exactly what part of the conversation did you overhear?”

 

“Right before the Dark Hour ended…and a little bit after.”

 

Now she sighed, turning away from him and the door. She took a seat on her bed and he stepped into the room, closing the door behind him.

 

“I don’t know what’s gotten into me,” she said. “I’m not usually like this. I mean, I don’t—grow attached to people. But now there’s Aki and there’s you—”

 

“Me? The person you constantly get pissed at?”

 

“I like to think of it as platonic hate.”

 

He chuckled. “All right. That ain’t a bad way to explain it.”

 

“Either way, I think I’m more pissed at Idun than anyone else right now.”

 

“Why? Because she was right?”

 

“No, because she hasn’t protected me from all this bullshit. The only frigging thing she’s good for and she’s failed me.”

 

“Was having no attachments to anyone really protecting you, though?”

 

“Of course it was.”

 

“You truly believe that?”

 

She shrugged her shoulders. “I’ve gotten this far, haven’t I?”

 

“Tch.”

 

Kirika looked out the window and into the storm. “A relationship with me would be like a hurricane. I’d destroy everything in my path, and then leave it to the other person to pick up the mess once I’ve dwindled.” She turned her focus back to Shinjiro. “Trust me when I say Akihiko’s better off without me.”

 

He stared back at her intently. “You’re a moron.”

 

She opened her mouth to retort, but there was a knock on the door. He opened it to reveal Akihiko on the other side. She froze, swallowing hard. _Shit_. Exactly how much did he just hear?

 

“Am I interrupting anything?” Akihiko said.

 

“No, we were just wrapping up,” Shinjiro said.

 

“Everything okay?” Kirika spoke up, finding her voice again.

 

“Not quite. Uhm…” Akihiko gestured to what seemed to be just downstairs. “Fuuka is attempting to cook.”

 

“I’m on it,” Shinjiro said. He left.

 

Kirika hesitantly joined Akihiko by the door. She wasn’t sure how he would act around her, after all. But he looked directly at her and gave her a soft smile. He then also made his way down the hall. Her stomach flipped and she followed after them.

 

Shinjiro was right; she was a moron.


	66. September 21st, 2009

“Hey, look who’s finally come to,” Kirika said a couple days later when she saw Minato walk down the stairs. “You slept through the whole typhoon. Literally.”

 

“You should go get some fresh air,” Yukari said. “It’s really nice out now.”

 

“And if you’re feeling up to it, we should explore Tartarus tonight,” Mitsuru said. “The next full moon is only a couple weeks away.”

 

“Let him take it easy,” Shinjiro said. “We have plenty of time to train. There’s no need to rush it.”

 

Kirika pursed her lips. “Don’t say that in front of Aki.”

 

“Shut up,” Akihiko said back with a chuckle.

 

She scrunched her nose at him before laughing a bit. She didn’t fully understand it, but Akihiko was acting totally normal around her now. It was as if the incident from the other night had never even happened. Not that she was really complaining, but there was still something about his attitude that was bothering her. Bothering? Maybe that wasn’t the right word…

 

“You know, they say idiots never get sick,” Junpei spoke up.

 

“Huh. Says the guy who’s never been sick,” Kirika said.

 

“Hey…” He pouted. “Hey, I’ve never seen you get sick, either.”

 

“I have,” Shinjiro said.

 

She smiled. “Thanks, Aragaki.”

 

“Tch.” He rolled his eyes at her, chuckling.

 

Junpei went on pouting. “Well, what do _they_ know anyway?”

 

“More than you do,” she said.

 

“Hey!”

 

Now Yukari was laughing. “C’mon, Stupei, you set yourself up for that one.”

 

“Whatever…”

 

Kirika also chuckled a bit more before getting to her feet. “Well, I think I’m gonna for a walk seeing as I’ve been stuck inside for the last few days.” She turned her attention on the Shiba Inu. “Do you wanna come with me, Koro-chan?”

 

Koromaru wagged his tail and barked before running over to the door.

 

“Let’s go, then,” she said. She looked around the lounge. “Would anyone else like to join us? Speak now or forever hold your peace.”

 

“I’ll go,” Akihiko said. “It’ll feel good to get some exercise.”

 

So, the three of them headed out. They made their way for the Shrine, Akihiko jogging the whole way there. Once they arrived, Kirika and Akihiko took a seat on the bench while Koromaru began running around.

 

“We haven’t met here for a while,” he spoke up.

 

“No, we haven’t.”

 

“Hey, how has your injury been?”

 

“My injury?”

 

“From when you got shot.”

 

“Oh, right.” She shook her head. “Not bad. My hip gives out every now and then from sudden sharp twinges of pain, but it’s pretty good overall. Doesn’t really hurt that much anymore.”

 

“Aside from the sharp twinges of pain?”

 

She paused. “Exactly.”

 

He let out a breath of chuckle before turning serious. “I’m gonna make sure Strega doesn’t lay a hand on you.”

 

“You don’t have to worry about me. I can protect myself. That’s kinda my position on the team.”

 

“I don’t care. I won’t see you get hurt again.”

 

“Aki—”

 

“That night you got shot and you—Well, you literally ran into me. I mean, I don’t know if Idun recognised me and did that on purpose, or if it was just a coincidence, but—”

 

“She recognised you. There was nothing coincidental about it.”

 

Colour rose to his cheeks. “Either way, I barely knew you when that happened. We had had those few encounters, but I still didn’t know anything about you. Hell, I didn’t even know your name at that point.” He paused. “When I saw you were injured, though…I was scared. Terrified, even. So, I can’t even imagine how I would react now if something like that happened to you.” He looked up at her. “I honestly don’t know what I would do with myself.”

 

She smiled sheepishly. “You’re too sweet.”

 

He returned the smile. “It’s the truth.”

 

She nodded, holding back a blush. “That night I distracted the Shadow to give you time to get away… It had driven me absolutely insane not being able to find out right away if you had made it to safety or not. And if I had had a way to track you down, I would have. Just so I could’ve checked up on you.”

 

“Well, aside from the injured shoulder and the few broken ribs, I was fine,” he said. “That all happened before you showed up, though.”

 

“I still can’t believe you tried taking on that Shadow by yourself.”

 

“I didn’t know what to expect. Nor had I been expecting it to begin with. But I don’t know what would’ve become of me if you hadn’t showed up.”

 

“C’mon, I wasn’t that much help.”

 

“Doesn’t matter how much help you provided or didn’t provide. You saved me that night by taking a risk on a stranger. You grabbed my Evoker and blindly pulled the trigger. You revealed the most secret part of yourself to me without thinking twice about it.”

 

“The most secret part of myself, huh?” She considered this. He had a pretty good point, after all. Her Persona might as well have been the most secret aspect of her. The part she always kept hidden. And she had been willing to expose that part of herself before she even knew Akihiko’s name. “I guess I’ve never thought of it like that.”

 

He smiled again. Gently. “That’s why I have so much faith in you.”

 

Kirika squeezed her eyes shut, turning her head away from him. She refused to cry in front of him. “Must’ve been _torture_ not being able to train for those couple of months,” she said instead.

 

“Oh, shut up. Don’t mock me.” He nudged her with his elbow and she laughed. “But, for your information, it was awful. Especially since that was when Arisato, Takeba, and Iori started exploring Tartarus. Tch. I couldn’t join them until I was better.”

 

“What about Kirijo?”

 

“She was in Fuuka’s position at first.”

 

“Ah.” She paused, watching Koromaru as he ran around the Shrine, enjoying himself. “I never intended for Shinji to find out I was a Persona-user.”

 

“How did he find out?”

 

“We got stuck out in the open during the Dark Hour. It was my fault since I had kept us out so late, but…” She shrugged, shaking her head. “That’s beside the point. Just figured I’d own up to it. Either way, we got chased down by a couple smaller Shadows. We made a run for it, maneuvering our way around until we thought we were in the clear. Turns out we weren’t, and a Shadow got a hold of him. I persuaded Idun to emerge and protect him, and we took off again until we knew for sure we were safe.”

 

“Did he have a fit?”

 

“By the time we got to our safe spot, we were both way too exhausted to even think about talking about it. Then by the following day, we had both had time to sleep on it and let it sink in.”

 

He nodded. “So…you two have spent nights together?”

 

She raised an eyebrow at him. “It sounds a hell of a lot worse than it is when you put it like that, y’know. But yeah, Shinji and I had a hideout and it just so happened to be the same place.”

 

“Oh.”

 

She couldn’t help the sly smile. “Does that make you jealous?” His head dropped in reply, causing her smile to fade away. She leaned in closer to him, softening her voice. “Aki, I already told you, there’s nothing between me and Shinji.”

 

“You don’t have to defend yourself.”

 

“That doesn’t change the fact that there is absolutely nothing between me and Shinji. As I so eloquently put it the other day,” she went on, warranting a chuckle from him as she sat back again, “our relationship is based off a platonic hate.”

 

“Platonic hate?”

 

“Basically, yeah. Even he found it fitting.”

 

He laughed again. “I bet he called you an idiot.”

 

“Moron, actually.”

 

“Ah, I always get idiot.”

 

“Tch. I knew those were terms of endearment for him.”

 

Kirika then watched as Akihiko laugh even more. Harder. And the blush she had been trying so hard to hold back was now spreading its way across her cheeks. He hadn’t even said anything flattering or embarrassing or…whatever. Just seeing him happy made her feel—Made Idun feel—

 

“Kiri…”

 

Oh, how she’d grown to love hearing that voice speak her name. The new nickname was even better, though. And only he would be able to get away with using it.

 

“Senpai!” a shrill voice then said.

 

They both turned their heads towards the Shrine entrance to see two girls rushing over to them.

 

“Oh, these girls are different from the two before,” Kirika said.

 

“Just…” He sighed. “Let me handle it.”

 

“Senpai, how are you?” the girl said once they were standing in front of him.

 

He rose to his feet. “I’m okay, thanks.”

 

“It’s such a beautiful day,” the second girl said. “Almost as if the typhoon never came through here.”

 

“Wanna go for a walk with us, Senpai?”

 

“And maybe we could grab a bit to eat after.”

 

“I’m kinda in the middle of something,” he said, gesturing to Kirika.

 

The two girls turned their attention on her and their expressions darkened.

 

“Who is she?” the first girl said.

 

“Who cares?” the second girl said. “Ditch her and come with us, Senpai.”

 

He shook his head. “I’m not gonna do that. Sorry, girls.”

 

With that, the two girls stormed off, unafraid of showing their extreme disappointment by practically throwing a temper tantrum.

 

“Damn, if looks could kill,” Kirika spoke up.

 

“Sorry about that,” Akihiko said. “It’s so much easier to ignore them at school.” He sat back down. “Doesn’t help I hate being approached on my free days.”

 

“And you deny being the _it_ boy.”

 

“Please don’t start with that again.”

 

“Why? It’s kinda flattering.”

 

“How do you mean?”

 

“All these girls just _vying_ for your attention, and then here I am. The mysterious stranger you’re giving your attention to.” She grinned. “Pisses them off and, if you ask me, that’s pretty damn flattering.”

 

“Wait…so are you flattered to have my attention or because they’re jealous of you?”

 

“Hmm.” Idun knew the answer to that one. “You’ll never know.”

 

“Oh, come on.”

 

She laughed. “Relax, you kinda do already know the answer.” She figured she’d just give him the satisfaction. After all, she wasn’t interested in playing games. Never had been a fan of them.

 

He thought for a moment. “Yet, you don’t seem to actually want my attention.”

 

“I don’t deserve it, but that doesn’t make it any less flattering.”

 

“You don’t deserve it? So, should I have gone with those other two girls instead of staying here with you?”

 

“You could’ve done whatever the hell you wanted. Frankly, I don’t get why you’re giving me the time of day anyhow when you seem like the type of guy who doesn’t give a shit about relationships in the first place. Romantic relationships, at least.”

 

“Kirika…” He sighed. “Why are you doing this?”

 

“Doing what?”

 

“Isn’t it hurting you more this way?”

 

“This isn’t about me anymore. It…hasn’t been about me for a while. It’s about you now.” She swallowed hard. “I thought I told you that.”

 

“Well, I guess I didn’t fully understand it. Guess I’m still trying to figure out exactly how this is protecting me.”

 

“It may not seem like it now, but you’ll thank me in the future.”

 

“You won’t be around then. And that won’t make it any better. That won’t make it hurt any less.”

 

She looked over at him with a sharp turn of her head. Then she took a deep breath, sitting up. “Aki—”

 

“For the record, you’re right. I’ve never been interested in dating before, so I’m no better at this than you are. I mean, this is new territory for me, too. So—”

 

“Except his isn’t just new territory for me,” she said. “It’s not just some uncharted map or whatever. This is totally out of the norm for me. It’s nothing close to what I’ve grown accustomed to.”

 

“That doesn’t mean we can’t figure it out together.”

 

Now she shook her head. “No, we can’t.”

 

“Why not?”

 

“Because there’s nothing to figure out.”

 

That was when Koromaru ran back over and sat before the two of them. He barked a couple times, his tail still wagging.

 

“Oh, I guess he’s ready to head home,” Akihiko said. He stood up. “Let’s go.”

 

Kirika didn’t move. “Do you trust me?”

 

He paused. “With my life.”

 

“Then trust me on this.” She looked up at him. “Please. It’s for the better.”

 

“Yeah, that’s what you told Shinji.”

 

She sighed. “So, you did overhear us…”

 

Koromaru whimpered. She petted him in response.

 

“Let’s just go,” he said.

 

With that, they made their way back to the dorm. During the walk, Koromaru stayed in between Kirika and Akihiko, keeping them separated. But that didn’t keep them from stealing glances.

 

Uncharted territory. That was one way of putting it. Fearing the unknown was another way to put it. And Kirika was afraid. She needed to have control of her life, and this was the best way to keep that control. Even if it hurt.


	67. September 24th, 2009

While the group had a few days off from school, Kirika made sure to spend her time away from the dorm. Hell, she couldn’t even stand spending time with Shinjiro now. Although, she couldn’t do any readings seeing as she found it too difficult to focus on other people when all she could think about was Akihiko. And she hated that that was the case.

 

Even when the group returned to school, she still made sure to get out of the dorm during the course of the day. She always seemed to end up at the mall, though. Better yet, at the café. And when she left that day, she passed by Gekkoukan High just as classes finished for the day.

 

“Good afternoon,” Mitsuru greeted her when they crossed paths outside the school’s front gates.

 

“Uh, hi,” she said. She cleared her throat. “How were classes today?”

 

“They went well. Thank you.”

 

“That’s…good.”

 

The two girls fell silent. Kirika had sensed a faint hostility between herself and Mitsuru since the day they met, and Idun sensed it, too. And it seemed to almost always get in the way.

 

“Are you coming back from the mall?” Mitsuru spoke up.

 

“I am. I had stopped by the café.”

 

“You seem to spend a lot of time there.”

 

“Well, it’s been a long week. Usually every week is a long week.”

 

“I see.” She paused. “So, cases of Apathy Syndrome are on the rise again.”

 

“I’ve noticed.”

 

“But there are only three Shadows left.”

 

“Yeah, that’s a plus. Hopefully these last few battles will go over as well as the previous ones have.”

 

“I’m sure they will.”

 

“Oh, yeah, I have no doubt they will, too, but it’s still good to hope.”

 

“Right, of course.”

 

Another silence. This one a bit uncomfortable. Hell, Kirika’s conversations with Aigis weren’t even as mechanical.

 

“You and Akihiko seem to be spending an extra amount of time together lately,” Mitsuru spoke up first once again.

 

That caught her off guard. “Do we?”

 

“Yes, you do.”

 

“Please don’t tell me you’re one of those girls, too.”

 

“One of those girls?”

 

“Oh, y’know…one of those girls who seem to be obsessed with—” She shook her head. “Sorry, obviously you’re not one of those girls, but that’s just sorta what came out.”

 

She chuckled a bit. “No worries. I know the exact girls you’re referring to. While we’re on the topic, though, I don’t view Akihiko in that way.”

 

“Oh?” She smiled. “Are you secretly into Shinji’s type?”

 

“I don’t view either of them in that way,” she corrected herself. “I see them both just as teammates.”

 

“Only teammates? Not friends?”

 

“Is there a difference?”

 

“Well, I guess to you there isn’t, so that’s what really counts.”

 

More silence. Not as uncomfortable now. Still kinda weird, though. And it lasted the rest of the trip to the dorm. Then when they arrived, Kirika booked it straight for her room. Clearly she still wasn’t prepared for social interaction. It wasn’t long before there was a knock on her door, though.

 

“Come in,” she said.

 

Yukari entered her room, closing the door behind her. “Mind if we talk, Senpai?”

 

She turned tentatively in her desk chair. _What the hell is going on_? “Of course not.” She forced a smile. “Something bothering you?”

 

“Well, I know you don’t typically have relationships with people, but I figured you still may be able to help me out. Plus, you have been spending a lot of time with Akihiko-san as of late—”

 

“For the record, I have been spending a normal amount of time with him.”

 

“Uh…right.” She chuckled. “Either way, I had a feeling you may be better to talk to than Mitsuru-san.”

 

“So, this is about a boy, I’m assuming.”

 

She nodded. “Yeah.”

 

“Before we go any further—”

 

“It’s not Stupei, if that’s what you’re afraid of.”

 

She laughed. “Good girl.” They sat down together. “So, you like Arisato?”

 

“What makes you think it’s him?”

 

“I’m sorry, but what other guys do you hang out with?”

 

Her cheeks reddened a bit. “You don’t attend school with us, so how would you know?” She paused. “But I guess you have a point…”

 

And for a good while, Kirika and Yukari just sat there chatting. Once Yukari was done ranting about her boy troubles, they began discussing other topics. Kirika soon realised it was the first real conversation she had had with the girl since she moved into the dorm. It was intriguing, too. The girl was much smarter than she may have acted. More down-to-earth and grounded than she appeared.

 

“Well, thanks for lending me your time, Senpai,” Yukari said a while later. “And thanks for the advice.”

 

“Use it wisely,” Kirika said.

 

She laughed. “I definitely will. Now I’m gonna go study for a bit before heading to bed. I might have a pop quiz in one of my classes tomorrow.”

 

Her Kohai bid her goodnight and took her leave. Kirika then lay back on her bed. For the first time ever, she felt like a normal teenage girl. Not a girl with special abilities who was aware of a special hour of the night barely anyone else remained conscious during. Not a girl who had spent her entire life running from place to place to place because she had lost her parents when she was only eleven. Just a normal girl.

 

Except she wasn’t a normal teenage girl. She was a girl with special abilities who was aware of a special hour of the night barely anyone else remained conscious during. She was a girl who had spent her entire life running from place to place to place because she did lose her parents when she was only eleven.

 

That was a life she couldn’t get back. A childhood she couldn’t get back. But that didn’t mean she couldn’t change her life now.


	68. September 28th, 2009

Two o’clock in the morning. It was two o’clock in the morning and Kirika was still wide awake. And she was still thinking too much about Akihiko. So, she decided she wanted to try to rectify the so-called problem.

 

She crept out of her room and down a single flight of stairs. She then proceeded to tip-toe to Akihiko’s bedroom door, practically holding her breath. Then, just as she was about to a knock, she felt a hand on her shoulder. She jumped out of surprise.

 

“Damn it,” she said, her voice barely audible, despite her scare. “Wow, it’s weird seeing you without that coat on. Yet you still have the beanie on.”

 

“Shut up,” Shinjiro said. “The hell do you think you’re doing?”

 

Now she smirked. “C’mon, I can’t let you have all the fun of corrupting him.”

 

“Tch. Don’t tell me he breaks the rules for you.”

 

“Oh. No, this is my first time coming down here in the mid—”

 

“Why?”

 

“Uhm…w-well—”

 

Just then, the door opened, revealing a sleepy-looking Akihiko. Idun fluttered at the sight of him. “Is it really necessary for the two of you to be having a conversation outside my door in the middle of the night?” He rubbed his eyes.

 

Shinjiro only rolled his eyes. “Yeah, I didn’t see anything.” He then returned to his own bedroom.

 

Kirika swallowed hard. “Light sleeper, huh?”

 

Akihiko shrugged his shoulders. “Kinda have to be, when you think about it. Could need to wake up at any moment.”

 

“Right.”

 

He paused. “Is everything okay?”

 

“Y-yeah. Uhm…sorry. I just—I couldn’t sleep. N-not that I was gonna ask t-to come in or anything.”

 

He raised an eyebrow at her. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

 

She nodded. “I’m sure. Again, just couldn’t sleep. Thought I’d…drop by…”

 

“Y’know, Kiri, if you want to you can—” he started, gesturing inside his room.

 

“Oh, I really shouldn’t,” she said. “I mean, it wouldn’t be a good idea. It wouldn’t be very smart of us to—Plus I don’t wanna get you in trouble. I mean, something tells me Kirijo has some sort of weird censor that wakes her up whenever someone’s been out of bed for a strangely elongated amount of time.”

 

He chuckled. “Yeah, can’t say I’d be surprised.”

 

“Yeah. So, uh, I think I’m gonna go.”

 

“Okay. Goodnight, then.”

 

“G’night.”

 

Akihiko closed his door and Kirika let out a short breath she felt she had been holding since the moment he opened it. She felt utterly ridiculous. So, she started making her way back towards the stairs. But not before noticing Shinjiro was leaning against his open doorframe, arms folded across his chest.

 

“I didn’t think you saw anything,” she said.

 

“Tch.” He shook his head at her. “You’re a moron.” He then also closed his door.

 

With that, she returned to her own bedroom. Despite the awkward encounter, she did actually feel better…oddly enough. There was something settling about seeing Akihiko half asleep that she didn’t fully understand. At that moment, though, she didn’t want to question it. So, she just curled up under her covers and finally fell asleep.

 

When she woke up only a few hours later, she decided her head was clear enough to go out and do some readings. So, she made her way for Paulownia Mall and set up her mini station. It was another slow day, but that was okay. And by the time she wrapped things up, it was around five o’clock in the evening. She made her way for Port Island Station, bumping into Junpei not far from the mall.

 

“Let me guess,” she started, “you’re on your way back from the hospital.”

 

“Is it that obvious?” he said.

 

“You only spend all your free time there.”

 

“Oh. Do you think it’s weird?”

 

“That depends on whether or not you want my honest opinion.”

 

“Well, honesty is the best quality.”

 

“Then no, I don’t think it’s weird. I actually think it’s very sweet.”

 

He paused. “Uh…why wouldn’t I have wanted to hear that?”

 

“I dunno. I just wasn’t sure if you maybe wanted another answer telling you that you’re being stupid or something.”

 

“Can’t say I’m following, Senpai.”

 

“Yeah, I don’t get what I’m saying half the time either.”

 

“There’s just something about her, y’know?” he went on.

 

“The fact that she’s technically the enemy, perhaps?”

 

“No, I met her before I learned she was a member of Strega. And the fact that that didn’t change the way I feel must mean something.”

 

“Yeah. It either means you really are stupid, or—” she paused, thinking. Then she shook her head. “Hmm. Nope, pretty sure you’re just stupid.”

 

“Hey!”

 

She laughed. “I’m kidding… Kind of.”

 

“Hmph.”

 

“The point is, you two are star-crossed lovers.” She sighed. “Iori, this can only end in one of two ways. Either Chidori decides you’re more important to her than Strega, or—”

 

Junpei shook his head. “I don’t wanna hear it.”

 

“Or she’s playing you and leading you on and this is all just some elaborate trap.”

 

“I said I didn’t wanna hear it.”

 

“You have to hear it because it is a possibility. And it will continue to be a possibility until we figure out her true intentions.”

 

His gaze fell to the ground. “Why does there have to be some hidden motive?”

 

“I’m not saying there definitely is; I’m only saying there’s always a chance. And I know it hurts to think about it, but that doesn’t make it any less feasible. Plus, there is a damn good chance—”

 

“Stop.”

 

Kirika swallowed hard. “Sorry.”

 

“This isn’t gonna change anything. I’m still gonna visit her. I’m still gonna—”

 

“Good.”

 

His brow furrowed. “Huh?”

 

“Don’t let my thoughts change how you feel. Besides, what do I know? Not like I’ve ever been in a relationship.”

 

“What about you and Sanada-san?”

 

“Sanada and I are not in a relationship.”

 

“But Shinjiro-senpai said—”

 

“Said what, exactly?”

 

His eyes widened. “Uh…nothing.”

 

She shook her head, lips pursed. “That son of a bitch… I’m gonna kick his ass.”

 

Now he laughed. “Gotta admit, I’d love to see that.”

 

“Seriously, though, what did Aragaki say?”

 

“Oh, I just overheard him teasing Sanada-san about you.”

 

“Ah. I see. Well, there is nothing between Sanada and me.”

 

“Because you don’t do relationships, right?”

 

“Exactly.”

 

“Makes sense. After all, you do live in a dorm with nine other people and a dog, and yet you still spend most of your time alone. Then again, when you’re not alone it’s typically because you’re with Sanada-san. So, you should be able to see where all the assumptions have come from.”

 

She paused. “Tch.”

 

He laughed. “Got ya.”

 

“Oh, shut up.”

 

The two of them spent the rest of the short trip in silence. And when they got back to the dorm, Kirika headed straight for her room. Again. She stopped herself once she reached the second floor landing, though. Then she took a deep breath and returned to the lounge. She observed the scene in front of her before taking a seat on the couch between Akihiko and Shinjiro. Once she was settled, she grabbed the book she had started reading during the typhoon. She glanced over at Akihiko and he smiled at her. She felt her cheeks heat up a bit, causing her to fumble with opening the book. She heard him chuckle under his breath, and she did her best to hold back the blush. Then she felt Shinjiro nudge her arm, but she refused to look at him. She could already see the look on his face and mentally heard him calling her a moron. None of the others spoke a word, though. They all carried on as if nothing was transpiring. As if nothing was different. As if they were completely unaware. Because they all had their own lives outside of Personas and Tartarus and the Dark Hour. Normal lives. And if they were able to embrace the familiarity, why couldn’t Kirika? So, she continued to sit comfortably between the two strangers who had helped her realise that maybe it was time to grow attached. Maybe it was time to be a part of the world she lived in.

 

Maybe this was exactly what she needed to be ordinary.


	69. October 3rd, 2009

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And we're through another month now, haha Before I know, it'll be over. I mean, seriously, I can't believe it's October already x.x

“So, you’ve been a lot more social these last few days,” Shinjiro said one afternoon while the others were at school.

 

Kirika was browsing through yet another tabloid. She wasn’t in the mood for any heavy reading. “You’re one to talk.”

 

“Hey, I may not do a lot of conversing, but at least I actually spend time down here in the lounge around the others. You usually just lock yourself in your room.”

 

“Whatever.”

 

“Tch. So, what’s changed?”

 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” She kept her focus on the tabloid but couldn’t ignore the raised eyebrow he gave her. “What? Seriously, it’s nothing.” She shrugged her shoulders. “Guess I just figured it might be good for my fellow teammates to get to know me a little better.”

 

“Yeah, what a load of bullshit. Why can’t you just admit you’re warming up to the idea of friendship?”

 

She paused. “Never say that again; it sounded super weird.”

 

“Shut up.”

 

She smiled. “What do you even care?”

 

“Are you really still questioning me on that front?”

 

“Uhm, apparently, yeah.”

 

Just then, Koromaru barked at them.

 

“What’s up, Koro-chan?” Shinjiro said. The Shiba Inu ran over to his food bowl. “Oh, you hungry? I’ll prepare you something, then.” He stood up from the armchair. “You hungry, too?”

 

“Hmm?” Kirika said.

 

“Moron” That was when he stepped up to her and pulled the tabloid out of her hands. “Are you hungry?”

 

She eyed him warily. “I dunno.”

 

“Well, I’m gonna make something for Koromaru, so would you like for me to cook you something as well?”

 

“Excuse me? You cook?”

 

“Shut up and answer the damn question.”

 

“Well, I mean, if you’re offering…”

 

“Then what do you want?”

 

She smiled. “Surprise me.”

 

“Tch. Fine.”

 

With that, Shinjiro began preparing the two separate meals. Koromaru sat by him and watched, while Kirika remained in the other armchair with the tabloid. Soon enough, though, her nose was too distracted.

 

“So, what’s my last meal?” she spoke up.

 

“Huh?”

 

“Well, you offered to cook, so I figured I must’ve done something to finally make you snap and want to kill me.”

 

He rolled his eyes, chuckling. “You’re being ridiculous again.” He made his way for the kitchen. “Hope curry’s okay.”

 

“Sounds good.” She paused. “Smells good.”

 

He finished up in about fifteen or twenty minutes. He served Koromaru first, and then prepared bowls for himself and Kirika. They ate in silence for a while.

 

“The next full moon is coming up,” she said.

 

He cleared his throat. “Tomorrow.”

 

“Yeah… I have to stay focused this time.”

 

“Everything’ll turn out fine.”

 

“I hope so.”

 

He paused. “Hey, can I ask you something?”

 

She swallowed her bite of food. “Sure.”

 

He pushed his food around in the bowl for a moment. “If anything were to ever happen to me, could you watch after Aki for me?”

 

“What? What are you getting at?”

 

“Just…” He fiddled with his chopsticks. “Do you think you could do that?”

 

“Hold on, where is this coming from?”

 

“Nowhere. I’m just not gonna be around for forever, so—”

 

“Well, neither am I.”

 

“That ain’t the point.” He inhaled deep through his nose, closing his eyes. “Okay. In all honesty, you’re the only other person I trust to look out for him. The only person he’ll listen to.”

 

“What about Kirijo?”

 

He shook his head. “Too controlling. So just shut up already and tell me you can keep an eye on him.”

 

“Not gonna lie, Shinji, you’re kinda scaring me.”

 

“You don’t gotta worry about it.”

 

“That’s what you always say.”

 

“Can you or can you not do that for me?”

 

She chewed the top of her chopstick a bit before letting out a heavy sigh. “Yeah, of course I could watch out for him.”

 

“Tch.” Another pause. “That a promise?”

 

“What?”

 

“About Aki. Do you promise?”

 

“C’mon, Shinji, what are you—?”

 

He practically slammed his chopsticks down now. “Kirika, please.”

 

She jolted in her seat, taken aback. “Fine. I promise.”

 

“Thank you.”

 

Once she recomposed herself, she pointed her chopsticks at him almost accusingly. “But you have to promise not to do anything stupid.”

 

“The stupid stunts are your job.”

 

“I’m serious.”

 

“Hmm.” His gaze fell to his now empty bowl. “Before I forget…” He reached into one of his pockets and pulled something out. He took another deep breath before placing the object on the table.

 

It was a small key.

 

Kirika’s eyes widened. “Holy shit…” She reached for the object intuitively. Tentatively. “This is—” She picked it up. “ _Is_ this what I think it is?”

 

He swallowed hard. “Yeah.”

 

“H-how long have you had this?”

 

“That ain’t important. Just…don’t get overexcited and come up with another crazy theory about what might be inside that frigging box.”

 

“Honestly, I had almost forgotten about it.”

 

“Damn. Maybe I shouldn’t have given you the key, then.”

 

“No, no, thank you.” She sighed, smiling out of incredulity. “I can’t believe you actually found it.”

 

“Yeah. Well…I just wanted to give it to you before—” Shinjiro stopped himself, turning his head away.

 

Her brow furrowed. “Before what?”

 

“Never mind.”

 

Just then, the others returned to the dorm all at once. Kirika quickly pocketed the key as to make sure no one else would spot it.

 

“Whoa, what’s that incredible smell?” Junpei said.

 

“Seriously. It smells delicious,” Yukari said.

 

“Shinji cooked,” Kirika told them, trying to compose herself. “Looks like he made enough for everyone, too.”

 

“Hey, you’ve never made me a meal,” Akihiko said.

 

Shinjiro scoffed. “Because all you eat is that protein shit.”

 

“What did you make, Senpai?” Fuuka said.

 

“Curry,” Kirika answered for the brunette.

 

The others didn’t hesitate to prepare bowls for themselves before sitting around the table to eat. Both Kirika and Shinjiro gave up their seats to make room for them, having lost their appetites anyhow. They found new spots for themselves on the couch.

 

“Is something going on, Shinji?” she asked, her voice low. “If there is, you know you can tell me.”

 

“Nothing’s wrong. I just wanna make sure Aki is taken care of,” he said. “And I wanted to get that stupid key to you before it slipped my mind.”

 

“This is so random, though.”

 

He shrugged his shoulders. “Don’t worry about it.”

 

“You’re still scaring me.”

 

“There’s no reason for you to be scared. Okay? Trust me.”

 

“I’m trying. You’re not making it easy.” She swallowed hard. “Don’t forget that Idun can sense when something’s off.”

 

He scoffed, cocking his head to the side. “And you think I suck at pretending not to give a shit.”

 

“C’mon, what happened to not being childish?”

 

“What happened to not overthinking?”

 

“I just wanna know what you’re hiding.” She paused, thinking. Trying to ignore Idun’s concern. “Maybe I can do something to help.”

 

“It’s nothing. I mean, you ain’t the only person who wants to protect the people they care about.”

 

Her breath caught in her throat. “What do you know that the rest of us don’t?” She waited for a response, but Shinjiro kept his head turned away from her. So, she looked towards Akihiko, sitting with the rest of the team at the table. “If anything does happen to you, you do realise he’ll be devastated, right?”

 

“He has you now.”

 

She looked back at the brunette. “Tch. I ain’t your replacement.”

 

“But at least he won’t be alone. Besides, he’ll be strong enough to carry on.”

 

“Shinji…”

 

Now he sighed. “Like I said, just trust me. I know what it is I need to do.”

 

She shook her head at him. “Fine.”

 

That was the end of the conversation. She could no longer handle it anyhow. So, they fell silent and listened to the loud chatter of the group eating around the table. And once they were all done there, they joined Kirika and Shinjiro in the lounge around the couches. Eventually, though, Kirika removed herself from the group and made her way up to her room. She figured she would try to sleep off Idun’s ongoing anxiety attack. But before she could get comfortable in her bed, there was a knock at the door. Then Akihiko opened it and let himself in before she had the chance to respond.

 

“Can I help you?” she said.

 

“I just wanted to say I’m glad to see you spending more time around the team now,” he said. “Mitsuru is, too.”

 

“Okay?”

 

His brow furrowed. “Everything all right?”

 

“Yup.”

 

“Are you sure? Because you and Shinji seemed to be having a pretty serious conversation downstairs.”

 

She held her breath. “Please, don’t do this right now.”

 

“I’m sorry. I just wanna know what’s going on.”

 

 _Tch. That makes two of us_. “Nothing. Just a little stressed about the operation tomorrow. Not sure why, but I have a bad feeling about it.”

 

“Oh. I’m sure it’ll be fine.”

 

She shook her head at him. “How can you always stay so relaxed?”

 

“Relaxed? I’m not. I’m just as nervous as everyone else is. Only difference is that I throw those nerves into every punch.”

 

“I’m still not a big fan of fighting, but…I guess when it’s necessary…”

 

“Hmm.” He thought for a moment. “Well, I’ll let you rest now.” He shot her a reassuring smile and it really did help her—help Idun—feel more at ease. “Come find me if you need anything.” And he left.

 

She crawled into her bed, under the covers, and curled up. Idun was still pacing the cavity of her chest and it was making her more than uncomfortable. The more she tried to ignore it, though, the more prominent the nagging became. And so Kirika could tell the coming night would be one full of those old dreams…


	70. October 4th, 2009

Kirika spent the following day locked away in her room. She was still trying to calm Idun down, but the closer it got to midnight, the more she continued to freak out. Once it finally came close to the Dark Hour, though, she emerged to join the others up in the Command Room.

 

“I’ve located the target,” Fuuka said. “It’s in the plaza in front of Iwatodai Station.”

 

“This will be the tenth,” the Chairman said. “Only a few left, but let’s worry about them one at a time.”

 

“Assuming they come one at a time.” Yukari giggled. “Just kidding.”

 

“Yukari-chan, how did you know?” Fuuka said. “I sense two of them.”

 

Her eyes widened a bit. “Are you serious? Me and my big mouth…”

 

“Where’s Shinji?” Akihiko then spoke up, looking around.

 

Both Kirika and Idun jolted at the inquiry.

 

“He just notified me that he’ll meet up with you later,” Fuuka said. “I didn’t ask any questions.”

 

Akihiko shook his head. “Figures. He’s always played by his own rules.”

 

“It’s okay,” Junpei said. “At least he’s coming, right?”

 

“Yeah,” Yukari said. “Not like someone I know who missed last time.”

 

“Hello? I was tied up, remember? Sheesh, give a guy a break.”

 

“Wait, Ken-kun isn’t here, either… Hey Junpei, go get him. That’ll be your punishment for last time.”

 

“Punishment? What is this, kindergarten?” He sighed. “That little shit is more trouble than he’s worth.” And he left.

 

“I have a bad feeling about this,” Kirika spoke up. “Idun has a bad feeling. Just like with Iori’s absence last time. And I really don’t think we should dismiss it this time. Maybe we should split up and—”

 

“No need,” the Chairman said. “I’m sure they’re both perfectly fine.”

 

“Stop.” She rose to her feet. “Arisato, Yamagishi, and three others can deal with the two Shadows. There’s no reason the rest of us can’t search for Aragaki and Amada during the time they’re battling.”

 

“What if you’re needed?”

 

“Fine. Then I’ll stay with them, too. That still leaves three people—”

 

“It’s better we simply all stick together,” the Chairmen went on. “In case of an emergency, of course.”

 

Okay. Now Kirika was getting pissed. As was Idun. “I’m sorry, but two of our members missing already is an emergency.”

 

“Enough.”

 

She clenched her jaw, looking away. There would be no winning this argument. Didn’t help that none of the others seemed as concerned. Figures. Of course they’d trust the man who’d been guiding for months now over her.

 

Mitsuru cleared her throat after a short awkward silence. “All right. Let’s move out. This time, there are two enemies. We’ll determine our formation once we arrive.”

 

“Kiri—” Akihiko started as the others began to head out.

 

“Y’know, a little backup would’ve been nice.”

 

“C’mon, the Chairman has a pretty good point.”

 

That wasn’t what she wanted to hear. “I don’t care. I don’t—” _I don’t trust him_. Except she wasn’t gonna say that. So, she took a deep breath. “Doesn’t it make you uncomfortable that it’s both Shinji and the kid who are missing?”

 

His brow furrowed, almost in a way that made it seem as if he hadn’t fully thought that part through.

 

“Better run along, you two,” the Chairman then said. “Don’t want you falling behind and missing out on the action.”

 

Akihiko nodded. “Y-yeah, we should catch up with the others.” And he left.

 

Kirika wasn’t so quick to listen. To follow. She watched Akihiko leave, but then turned her attention to the Chairman. He shot her what seemed to be a friendly smile. Innocent. Maybe to the others, at least. She could see right through it, though, and he was aware of that. And suddenly, the grin seemed almost sinister. _They’ll never believe you_. The haughty look in his eyes screamed those words. Idun could sense it. Hell, he may as well have said them aloud. And the worst part was…he was totally right. They wouldn’t believe her. Besides, it wasn’t her place to accuse him. Especially with no real proof. Tch. Nothing more than a stupid tarot reading and a bad feeling. So, Kirika simply sneered at him before taking her leave. That was the worst she could do. For now.

 

By the time she caught up with the group, they were already halfway to their designated location. Akihiko tried asking what had taken her so long, but she wasn’t in the mood to chitchat. For once, he seemed to catch on relatively quickly to that.

 

“There they are,” Yukari said once they arrived at the spot. “This is the way we go to school. We’ve gotta protect this place.”

 

“It seems like they’ve been waiting for us,” Fuuka said.

 

Mitsuru looked around. “Where’s Amada?”

 

Junpei shrugged his shoulders. “He wasn’t in his room, so who knows?”

 

“Damn it, Shinji,” Akihiko said. “Where are you?”

 

Kirika risked glancing towards him. His head was down and his expression…concerned. He even looked a little guilty. She swallowed hard.

 

“Uhm, I think we should hurry,” Fuuka went on. “They look like they’re about to make their move.”

 

“All right, let’s decide on a team and engage the enemy,” Mitsuru said.

 

From there, Kirika forced herself to focus on the task at hand. Especially since Akihiko was one of the few to go into battle with Arisato. So, she stood by Fuuka, hand hovering over her Evoker. This time, she’d be ready. Idun was more than ready.

 

“Good job, everyone,” Fuuka said once the Shadows were defeated.

 

Junpei sighed. “Man, talk about exhausting.”

 

“This time, those who call themselves Strega did not interfere,” Aigis spoke up.

 

“It must be because we have Chidori,” Yukari said. “Anyway, I’m glad everything went well. But what happened to Shinjiro and Ken?”

 

Kirika and Akihiko exchanged apprehensive glances.

 

“The Chairman doesn’t seem to be too concerned, so he went home,” Fuuka said.

 

“Seriously? What the hell is wrong with that man?” Kirika rolled her eyes. “Why the hell is he not be more concerned about this?” Stupid question. She knew exactly why.

 

“Please, calm down,” Mitsuru said. “Yamagishi, where are those two?”

 

Fuuka shook her head. “I’m sorry, I haven’t been able to locate them yet.”

 

“Let’s return to the dorm, and then go from there.”

 

“No. Let’s just split up and look for them now,” Kirika said.

 

She sighed. “Akihiko, are you listening?”

 

“Today is…October fourth, huh…?” Akihiko spoke up. He shook his head. “Just go back without me. I’m gonna go look for them for a while.”

 

“I’ll go with you,” Kirika said.

 

“No, stay with the others.”

 

“Shut up. I’m going with you.”

 

He sighed. “Fine.”

 

With that, the two of them took off. Kirika followed Akihiko’s lead, and neither of them spoke. Idun was still panicking within her, and she was still trying her damnedest to calm her down.

 

“What made you finally come to your frigging senses?” she soon spoke up.

 

“Today is October fourth,” he said again.

 

“Aki…what exactly is so special about October fourth?”

 

“It’s the day Amada’s mother was killed.”

 

Her eyes widened. “Oh, you’ve gotta be shitting me.”

 

He paused. “The station… We gotta get to Port Island Station. Come on.”

 

Then they were running. The world around Kirika vanished. Melted. It became nothing more than a blur of greens and yellows and reds. And the only thing she could feel was the pounding of her heart. The only thing she could hear was—

 

“Gunshots,” she said once she and Akihiko arrived at Port Island Station. “Those were most definitely gunshots.”

 

They made their way for the back alley where they came across Takaya, Ken, and—

 

“Shinji,” Akihiko called out.

 

“How very disappointing…” Takaya said. And he took off, disappearing in the cover of the darkness.

 

Kirika wanted to go after that son of a bitch more than anything else, but Idun stopped her. Idun knew she’d be better off staying right where she was. So, she stayed put. Then the rest of the group also arrived.

 

“What’s with the long face…?” Shinjiro said to Ken. “Isn’t this what you wanted?” He coughed.

 

“No, Senpai,” Fuuka said.

 

Akihiko knelt beside him and tried to help him up. Shinjiro only shrugged him off, but the other stayed put.

 

“It’s all right,” Shinjiro went on, still speaking to Ken. “Give yourself time, make your anger your strength… Come on, Ken, you’re just a kid. You’ve got your whole life ahead of you, so don’t waste it. Make it your own, okay?”

 

Ken was shaking his head, tears brimming his eyes. “But…I—I—”

 

Shinjiro managed to get onto his feet and that was when Kirika finally pulled her Evoker out. She brought it to her head, but Shinjiro only stopped her.

 

“I told you not to do anything stupid,” he said.

 

She swallowed hard, fighting back tears. Ugh. Where the hell did those come from? “Let me save you.”

 

He shook his head at her, stumbling forward a bit. “Aki…take care of him…”

 

Akihiko glanced over at the kid. He looked as if he wanted to step forward and grab hold of the brunette, but he was frozen in place. “I will…”

 

A smile tugged at the corners of Shinjiro’s lips. “This is…how it should be…” he said. He stumbled forward a bit more before collapsing to the ground.

 

Ken dropped to his knees, pounding the ground and crying. “No…!”

 

Kirika’s entire body was shaking. She looked over her shoulder at Akihiko and regretted it immediately. Never had she seen him look so defeated, and that devastated her even more. _Damn it_ … She dropped her head before allowing her Evoker to slip from her grasp. She took a deep, unsteady breath, squeezing her hands into fists. She then reached into her pocket and wrapped her fingers around the small key Shinjiro had given her just the night before.

 

Now she understood.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A moment of silence for our fallen (anti) hero, Shinjiro Aragaki <3


	71. October 5th, 2009

A good few hours after the Dark Hour and Kirika still found herself shaking and unable to sleep. Finally, she crawled out of bed and crept out of her room and down to the second floor. She started down the hall, stopping in front of the second door on the left. She took a deep breath and raised a hand to knock. Before she could get to the action itself, though, the door opened.

 

Akihiko stood on the other side, looking both taken aback and disheartened all at once. “I was just about to go see if you were still up.”

 

She smiled sheepishly. “I am.” She swallowed hard. “Can I—?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

He stepped aside, granting her permission to enter. She wrapped her arms around herself before taking that first step. She glanced around the room, trying to make out what little she could through the darkness. Akihiko closed the door behind them and returned to his bed. He didn’t lay down, just sat on the edge. It took Kirika a moment to muster up the courage to sit beside him.

 

For a while, they simply sat together in silence. In darkness. Soon enough, the sun began to peak through the shades of the window. Kirika watched as hints of oranges and pinks graced Akihiko’s face. His eyes were closed, but she could tell he was thinking. She could only imagine he was thinking of ways he could’ve possibly changed the outcome of the events of the previous Dark Hour. After all, that’s exactly what she had been thinking about, as well.

 

“Do you hate me?” she spoke up, her voice cracking. It was the question she had wanted to ask since the moment she stepped into the room but was too afraid to.

 

He paused, cocking his head to the side before opening his eyes and looking over at her. “What?”

 

She couldn’t return the gaze. “Do you hate me?”

 

“Why would I hate you?”

 

“Because I could’ve saved him.

 

Another pause. “He didn’t want you to.”

 

“Should I have let that stop me?”

 

“Kiri…”

 

Tears were brimming her eyes again. “I’m so sorry, Aki… A-and I know I—I hate that phrase, but—”

 

“Sometimes it has to be said. Sometimes the sentiment is worth it.”

 

“You taught me that.” She finally dared to meet his gaze. “Even if you hadn’t intended to, you did.”

 

He brushed some hair out of her face and behind her ear. She turned her head into the touch, so he cupped her cheek, wiping away a few stray tears. “You’re freezing.”

 

“That’s what Idun does when she’s upset. She goes numb…”

 

Akihiko didn’t bother saying anything else. Instead, he removed his hand from her cheek to slip his arm around her shoulders and pull her into him. Kirika buried her tear-stained face in the crook of his shoulder. Then she wasn’t sure when it happened, but they were soon laying together, Kirika still wrapped up in Akihiko’s arms. And they remained just like that until they managed to fall asleep.

 

When her eyes fluttered open, she was greeted by a much brighter sun filtering through Akihiko’s window. It must’ve been early in the afternoon by now. Then she shifted to find that she wasn’t as alone as she thought she would be.

 

“Shouldn’t you be at school?” she spoke up.

 

“Couldn’t make myself get out of bed,” he said. “I’ve been laying here for a few hours now.”

 

“Why didn’t you wake me?”

 

“You looked so at peace with yourself for once.”

 

“Well, that’s not at all how I feel.”

 

He sat up and she propped herself up on her elbows. His face fell into his hands and he stayed like that for a couple minutes.

 

“Let’s go get something to eat,” he soon said.

 

Now she sat up all the way. “I can’t eat. I feel sick to my stomach.”

 

“Then keep me company while I grab a bite to eat.”

 

She nodded. “I can do that.”

 

They then freshened up and headed out. Akihiko was really craving a bowl of ramen, so that’s where they went to get food. He ordered the special and Kirika just sat with him, helping him feel at least a little less alone. And at one point, his phone went off.

 

“Who’s that?” she said.

 

“Mitsuru,” he said. “Guess the school had a memorial for Shinji.”

 

“You should’ve been there.”

 

“Wouldn’t have brought him back.”

 

And that was the end of it. He finished his ramen and they left the restaurant.

 

She shrugged her shoulders. “Now what?”

 

“School should be getting out soon…” He paused. “C’mon.”

 

She didn’t ask any questions, just followed him to Iwatodai Station. From there, they took the tram to Port Island. Soon enough, they found themselves outside the emptying school building. She continued to follow him as he headed inside. They didn’t stop until they were in the auditorium. Akihiko moved down the aisle to climb onto the stage where Shinjiro’s memorial was still set up. Kirika stayed towards the back.

 

“Yo,” he said, addressing the picture of Shinjiro. “I had the usual for lunch. Ramen tastes a lot better when you’re cutting class. Make sure you invite me next time.” He turned away from the table. “Say something, will you? Why are you always like that? You’re so stubborn. Put yourself in my shoes for a change.” He turned back to lean against the table. “You think it’s the other way around, huh? I guess you’re right… I was too obsessed with power. Ever since I lost Miki, that’s all I’ve cared about. I thought if I was strong enough, I could protect anyone. But I was wrong. And now you’re gone, too…” He sighed. “I’m such an idiot.” He dropped his head and pounded the table out of frustration. “In battle, there’s always a chance of dying. I knew that. But I was so focused on fighting that I didn’t notice anything else. It didn’t matter how tough I was. Look what happened.” He dropped to his knees, screaming. Kirika cringed, looking away as the urge to cry swept over her once more. Then Akihiko looked back up at the picture. “Yeah, I know… Crying won’t change anything, will it?” He got back to his feet. “All right, Shinji, you watch from there with Miki. I still have things to do, right?”

 

Just then, there was flash of light, and it felt as if time had frozen. But as quickly as it had happened, it ended.

 

“I know that much,” he went on. He took a deep breath. “I can’t carry this guilt forever. I’m getting sick of it.” He rejoined Kirika at the other end of the auditorium. She was still looking away, squeezing her eyes shut. “I’m sorry.”

 

Now she looked back up at him. “What are you apologising for? You didn’t do anything wrong.”

 

“You shouldn’t have had to see me like that.”

 

“Tch. Don’t worry about it.” She forced a smile. “You did a lot of thinking this morning, huh?”

 

“Had nothing else to do.” He took a deep breath. “Let’s go.”

 

“I’ll meet you out there.”

 

He nodded and exited the auditorium. She then made her way to the stage.

 

“Guess I was right in believing you knew something the rest of us didn’t,” she started. “I mean, you were fully prepared for this, weren’t you, Aragaki? Tch. You’re ridiculous.” She shook her head. “Oh, thanks again for the key. I still can’t believe you found the damn thing. Or maybe you had it all along… Either way, I’ll let you know what’s inside the box once I go back to open it.” She paused. “I respect the fact that you believe things are better this way. And I’ll be sure to keep my promise; I’ll watch after Aki for you. Besides, not like I can get far with a bad hip, right?” She choked on her laughter. “I know you hate it when I worry about you, but… Well, we both suck at pretending we don’t give a shit. So just…stay out trouble, yeah? I mean, if you do, then so will I. After all, we are one and the same.”

 

With that, she made her way out of the auditorium. Akihiko was waiting for her on the other side of the double doors.

 

“We can go now,” she said.

 

“He asked you to look after me?” he said.

 

She swallowed hard. “Yeah, he did.”

 

“A-and you promised him you would?”

 

“I did.”

 

He paused. “Wouldn’t you have to stick around to keep that promise?”

 

“You would think so, huh?”

 

That was the end of it. Soon enough, they made their way back to the dorm. And then they headed up to the Command Room when Fuuka let them know they were holding a last-minute meeting. When they entered the room, the atmosphere was somber.

 

“You all know the reason we’re gathered here,” Mitsuru said. “We need to discuss how to deal with Amada. I’ve already consulted the Chairman.” She paused. “Aigis, bring Amada here.”

 

“Understood,” Aigis said, and she left.

 

“It’s my fault,” Fuuka said. “When Shinjiro-senpai told me he’d be late, I thought it was strange, but I said nothing. If only I’d listened to my intuition…”

 

“Don’t be so hard on yourself, Fuuka,” Yukari said.

 

“It’s not your fault,” Mitsuru went on. “If anyone should have realised it, it should have been me.”

 

“I know this wasn’t a game, but…” Junpei let out a heavy sigh. “I never thought it’d end up like this…”

 

“We should’ve just gone looking for them sooner,” Kirika spoke up. “Then maybe we could’ve gotten there before Takaya.”

 

“There’s no point dwelling on the past,” Akihiko said. “Shinji’s last words were, ‘This is how it should be.’ He was a hell of a guy. He even faced death head-on. That’s why, from this day forward, I’ll face things head-on, too.”

 

Junpei nodded. “That’s cool, man.”

 

“Senpai…” Yukari said.

 

Kirika took one of Akihiko’s hands in her own, embracing the shock rather than jumping from it. She took his hand and forgot about the others in that single moment. She smiled, shaking her head at him. He returned the smile.

 

Aigis then returned. “Allow me to report: Amada-san is not in his room.”

 

“He’s not?” Yukari said.

 

“There are indications that the window has been pried open.”

 

Fuuka’s eyes widened. “Ken-kun…” She started for the door.

 

“Wait, Fuuka,” Yukari stopped her. “Do you know where he is?”

 

“Well…no…but we have to find him. He must feel so alone…”

 

“Fuuka…”

 

“You of all people should understand.” She paused. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to—”

 

“Let Ken do what he wants,” Akihiko said. “Bringing him back won’t change anything… And we can’t keep treating him like a kid.”

 

“Akihiko…” Mitsuru said.

 

“It’s his choice. He’s the only one who can decide how he’s going to live his life. The same goes for all of us.”

 

Once the meeting was dismissed, Kirika found herself standing in the doorway leading into Shinjiro’s old room, her arms folded across her chest. Soon enough, she was joined by Akihiko.

 

She swallowed hard. “Is it wrong for me to…resent Amada?”

 

“He’s just a kid.”

 

“He wanted to kill Shinji.”

 

“Well…not that I’m trying to defend him, but if you found out who killed your parents, wouldn’t you want to have revenge, too?”

 

She chuckled sheepishly. “Funny you should ask.” She then shook her head. “But…no. I wouldn’t wanna live with that.”

 

“Like I said, he’s just a kid. He doesn’t fully understand it yet.”

 

“He’s mature enough for his age to—”

 

“C’mon, you heard what Shinji said and he wasn’t even upset with him.” He let out a heavy sigh. “It’s tough, I know. Trust me, I know. But…everyone has their own personal reason for doing what they think is right. For fighting. In the end, we gotta let them decide what’s right and wrong on their own.”

 

“Well, I think Amada figured it out a little too late.”

 

“Shinji didn’t, though, which is why he took the bullet for him.”

 

Now she breathed deep. _He’s just a kid…which is why he took the bullet for him_. She shook her head. “I dunno. Maybe I’m the one who doesn’t understand.”


	72. October 8th, 2009

Much to the group’s relief, Ken ended up returning to the dorm the very next evening. Then the days to follow were spent mostly in silence. No one knew what to say, nor was anyone up for trips to Tartarus.

 

Kirika’s emotions were all over the place, too. One minute Idun would be totally numb, and the next she’d be throwing a tantrum over thinking about what had happened. Over the fact that she hadn’t even bothered trying to save Shinjiro. But she knew that Akihiko was right; he hadn’t wanted to be saved.

 

 _This is how it should be_.

 

A few days after the incident, there was a knock on her door. Akihiko let himself in before she could respond. But for once, he closed the door behind him.

 

“We need to talk,” he said.

 

She froze for a moment, almost concerned. “What’s on your mind?”

 

“You say you don’t give yourself the chance to grow attached to people because you think it’ll make things easier for you in the long run.”

 

“Yeah, not gonna lie, you and Shinji both kinda screwed that up for me.”

 

“Well, I’m tired of losing what’s important to me. I thought it would be better to not let things get too important than to risk losing them. But lately, I don’t think so…”

 

“Hold on, you kinda gave me shit for not—”

 

“Kirika.”

 

She paused. “Sorry.”

 

He swallowed hard. “If I want to avoid that feeling,” he then went on, “I have to work to protect what’s precious to me. And that means everything precious.” He locked his gaze with hers. “Including you.”

 

“Aki…”

 

He cupped her cheek with his gloved hand. Spark. He still seemed serious, but the look in his eyes was like the calm before a storm. So, she placed her hand over his, mesmerised. Spark. Then he took a deep breath and kissed her. After a few moments of initial disbelief, she kissed him back. And it was clumsy, but it was also electrifying.

 

“Oh, what the hell do you think you’re doing?” she said, breathless, once she pulled way. They remained barely an inch apart.

 

“Miki’s gone and Shinji’s gone…” he said. “You’re all I have left.”

 

“What about the rest of the group?”

 

“This isn’t about them. This is about you and me.”

 

“I already told you—”

 

He kissed her again before she could get the rest of the words out. And it took a lot for her to keep her train of thought. It felt as if the electricity was frying her brain.

 

“I am no good for you,” she said once they broke apart again. “Really. You’re much better off without me.”

 

“Shut up. No, I’m not. Besides, you made a promise to Shinji.”

 

A smile tugged at the corners of her lips. “This wasn’t included in that promise.” She paused. “You don’t care, do you?”

 

He remained serious. “No.”

 

“This isn’t gonna work out the way you want it to.”

 

“I don’t care. I—I’m not letting you go.”

 

“That’s what I was afraid of.”

 

He caressed her cheeks with his thumbs. The leather felt smooth against her skin. “Please don’t—don’t push me away.”

 

She shook her head. “I won’t. Not this time.”

 

He smiled, almost in relief. He then slid a hand to the nape of her neck, pulling her into a kiss even harder than the previous two. Still just as clumsy. Still just as electrifying.

 

“Y’know, you made me break all my rules,” she said after they separated once more. She smiled again. “Thank you for that.”

 

Akihiko then wrapped his arms around her and hugged her tightly. Kirika hugged him back, burying her face in the crook of his shoulder. And for a while, they remained just like that. They were comfortable, and it just felt so familiar. It had been an easy change for her. Now she felt confident in her ability to keep the promise.

 

Better yet, for the first time in forever, she felt at home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the sappiness of this chapter, haha


	73. October 13th, 2009

The next few days passed by, and Kirika and Akihiko went on acting as if nothing was different about their relationship. In front of the others, at least. When they were alone, it was a whole different story. He would hold her hand, or absentmindedly play with her hair, or kiss her cheek or forehead every time he left to do something and then came back. He was much more affectionate than she, but it was still brand new to her. She was slowly growing used to the comforting fondness, though.

 

The morning of the first day of the second semester exams arrived, and they were sure to wait as long as possible to leave the dorm so they wouldn’t bump into any of the others. Then they headed out together, Akihiko’s gloved fingers entwined with Kirika’s bared ones.

 

“Y’know, I guess the guys claimed that what happened to Shinji made it difficult for them to study for their exams,” he said once they were on the tram. He shook his head with a sigh. “I even tried telling them that he’d be pissed if he heard that himself. That he’d say they’re all acting childish and wouldn’t want this to slow them down. I’m not sure if they really listened to me, though.”

 

“If you can go on like this, then I’m sure they can get over it, too,” she said.

 

“Exactly. They’re being ridiculous.”

 

“They’re being morons.”

 

“Idiots.”

 

They smiled at one another. Bittersweet. Soon enough, Kirika distracted herself by tracing the faint lines in Akihiko’s gloves. There was still a shock almost every time they touched, but she had grown fond of it.

 

“I could read your palm if you wanted me to,” she spoke up.

 

“No thanks. I don’t believe in that kind of stuff.”

 

“That’s what Shinji said, but he still let me do a tarot reading for him.” She paused. “Now that I think about it, his final result was Death.”

 

“Excuse me?”

 

“In the tarot deck. The Death card was the card in place for his final result.”

 

“Tch.” He shook his head. “That’s good to hear.”

 

She swallowed hard. “Moving on… I mean, with the powers you have, I honestly don’t understand how you don’t believe in palm reading?”

 

He chuckled. “Good point.” And a pause. “What made you even want to learn? Or is it an Idun thing?”

 

“Oh, no—Well… I guess she does kinda help in the matter. It’s really just one of the ways I earn money for myself, though. The main way. It’s especially convenient in the cities or towns I visit that don’t currently have any places hiring. But I read people’s palms and perform tarot readings and tell people their fortunes. Y’know, all that superstitious stuff. You’d be amazed by how many people are so intrigued by the arts.”

 

“I believe it. There’s actually a teacher at Gekkoukan who has a class on that stuff. He’s, uh, also the nurse.”

 

“That’s a bit of an unsettling combination.”

 

He chuckled a bit more. She then continued softly tracing his gloves until he wrapped his fingers around hers. She looked up at him and smiled.

 

“Maybe I’ll let you,” he said.

 

“It’s okay if you don’t want me to.”

 

He shrugged. “No harm done.” He leaned forward and kissed her forehead, right at the bridge of her nose.

 

The tram arrived at Port Island Station, and they continued on their way to Gekkoukan High. When they arrived, they stopped at the front gates.

 

“Good luck with exams,” she said.

 

“Thanks,” he said. “What are you gonna do with yourself today?”

 

“I’m not sure. All I know is that it’s gonna start with a cup of coffee. Don’t worry about tracking me down or anything, though. Just go back to the dorm and rest once you’re out of school.”

 

“I’ll probably track you down anyway.”

 

“I wouldn’t complain if you did.”

 

He blushed faintly. Then the bell rang.

 

“That’s you,” she said.

 

“Guess so.” He squeezed her hand before bringing it to his lips and kissing it.

 

“Oh, what a gentleman.”

 

He chuckled. “I’ll see you later today.” And he walked away.

 

She watched him until he entered the school, and then she made her way for Paulownia Mall. As she now walked alone, she pulled something out of her pocket. The key Shinjiro had given her.

 

“I’ll be back for you soon,” she said. “Just a few more days.”

 

She stuffed the key back into her pocket and carried on her way. She arrived at the mall and headed for the café. She sat down and ordered her first cup of coffee. She drank it negligently. Next thing she knew, she was five cups in and felt more exhausted than she had in the last week. She shook her head, leaving the money she owed on the table before taking her leave.

 

As she stepped out of the café, she spotted a necklace on the ground. She picked it up and figured she might as well turn it in to the police with the station being right there. So, she did.

 

“Nishioka,” Officer Kurosawa said at the sight of her. He cleared his throat. “I’m sorry to hear about Aragaki. My condolences.”

 

“Oh, thank you,” she said. “It’s fine, though. We’ve been okay.”

 

“What about Sanada?”

 

“Actually, I think he’s doing the best out of all of us. He kinda…found his resolve, I guess you could say.” She paused. “But how’d you know that I knew Shinji?”

 

“Well,” he shuffled around behind the counter, “he left this.” He held up an old leather pocket watch. “Said to give it to either you or Sanada; whoever showed up first.”

 

“Tch.” She took the watch. “That son of a bitch…” She shook her head, chuckling under her breath. “Thank you for this.”

 

“Of course.”

 

She turned to leave, but stopped herself. “Oh, I almost forgot.” She set the necklace down on the counter. “That’s what I initially came in here for. Found that right outside the café just now.”

 

“That looks like a nice chain,” he said.

 

“Yeah. That’s why I assume whoever lost it will want it back.”

 

“I’ll call that a fair exchange.”

 

With that, she took her leave, making her way back towards Port Island Station to return to the dorm. And when she arrived at the station, she spotted the rest of the group also waiting for the tram. That was when she realised just how much time she had wasted at the café.

 

“Senpai, hey,” Yukari greeted her.

 

Kirika smiled at them. “Hey. How was the first day of exams?”

 

Junpei groaned right away. “Don’t get me started…”

 

“Well, maybe if you had actually taken the time to study you wouldn’t be having any issues,” Akihiko said.

 

“This is very true,” Aigis said. “Studying is a very important part of student life.”

 

“Yeah, but with what happened to Shinjiro-san—” Junpei said.

 

Kirika shook her head. “Shut up. That ain’t a good excuse. And if he was here right now, there’s no doubt in my mind he’d smack you over the side of your head.”

 

“I could hit you for him,” Akihiko said.

 

Junpei’s eyes widened a bit. “No, no, that’s okay. Thanks anyway, though.”

 

Kirika laughed a bit. “What about you, Arisato? How would you say your first day of testing went?”

 

Minato shrugged his shoulders. “Fine.”

 

She nodded. “I don’t know why I was expecting you to say more.”

 

Just then, the tram arrived, and the group boarded one-by-one. Luckily, it was crowded enough where Kirika and Akihiko could sit close together without it seeming odd.

 

Once they arrived back at the dorm, they all gathered around the lounge to relax after the long day. Koromaru walked around to greet everyone individually. Then he ended up sitting by Aigis and Ken.

 

“Aki, could I, uh, talk to you for a second?” Kirika spoke up.

 

“Sure,” Akihiko said. They stepped away from the rest of the group. “What’s up?”

 

She held out the shabby pocket watch for him. “Turns out Shinji left this with Kurosawa-san to give to one of us.”

 

He smiled sheepishly. “Shinji’s had that watch for—For as long as I can remember.”

 

“Well, now it can belong to you. I guess he wanted one of us to have it, but it would make much more sense for you to hold on to.”

 

He took it from her. “Thank you.”

 

With that, the two of them returned to the lounge to sit with the rest of the group.

 

Everyone was quiet, just doing their own thing. Akihiko was fixing up his boxing gloves. Mitsuru was reading a book. Yukari was browsing through a fashion magazine. Minato had his headphones on. Junpei was reading a manga. Fuuka was on her laptop. Ken was petting Koromaru. And Aigis seemed to just be enjoying the silence. Kirika smiled softly to herself. If an outsider saw the group, they wouldn’t think twice of them. They would see them all as typical high school students. They would never suspect the trauma they’d endured over the course of the last six months…

 

Not even in her own wildest nightmares would Kirika have ever imagined the trauma Idun had forced her through. The changes. The suffering. The pain. The happiness. The laughter.

 

A life she had never pictured for herself, but wouldn’t give up for the world.


	74. October 16th, 2009

Today was the day. Kirika’s eighteenth birthday.

 

She went about her morning routine as if it was just any other normal day. And she made sure not to mention anything to the any of the others. Especially not to Akihiko. Not that she would have anyway, but… Well, it wasn’t a day that needed to be celebrated. Besides, she already had something planned for herself.

 

After she and Akihiko bid their farewells outside the Gekkoukan High school gates, she headed towards Paulownia Mall to make him think she was going to the café again. Then again, she did end up at the mall. She stopped by the café, sitting down for a cup of coffee and grabbing a tea to-go. Then she made her way back to Port Island Station. When she got there, she headed for the back alley. The usual punks were hanging out, and this time, they took notice of her.

 

“Hey, you’re the chick who spent all that time with Aragaki,” one of the guys said.

 

“Yeah, what’s it to you?” she said.

 

A second guy snickered. “Heard he was involved in some sort of gang violence and got himself offed.”

 

“What are you getting at?”

 

“Is that true?”

 

“How is it any of your frigging business?”

 

“Oh, it ain’t,” the first guy said. He then smirked. “Don’t change the fact that we all knew he’d piss off the wrong person sooner or later.”

 

“You’re pissing off the wrong person right now,” she said. “Just shut up about it.”

 

“What are you even doing here?” the second guy said. “You come here just to be a little bitch?”

 

She stepped up to him so she was barely an inch away. “Say that again, prick.”

 

He paused. “You’re being a little bitch.”

 

She pursed her lips, nodding her head as she moved away from him. _Don’t let me blackout, Idun_. Then she took a quick breath before punching the guy square in the face. The other guy went after her, but she shoved him away.

 

“Get off me,” she said.

 

The second guy was holding his bleeding nose. “Hey, screw you.”

 

“You’re more reckless than Aragaki was,” the first guy said.

 

“Maybe you forgot that I’m also the chick who put your other buddy in the hospital,” she said. “Just be sure to keep that in mind before you piss me off again.”

 

With that, she took her leave, heading back to the station to wait for the tram. And as she waited, she kept shaking her hand. Her knuckles were sore and already bruising, but nothing felt broken. This wasn’t gonna be easy to explain to Akihiko. What the hell was that even about? She had no reason to go there in the first place. As for why she did, she couldn’t even tell herself. At the same time, though, punching that guy in the face sure as hell felt good.

 

Once the tram arrived, Kirika boarded it and made her way for Iwatodai Station. From there, she headed to the Shrine. It was still pretty early. Barely noon yet. She had the rest of the day ahead of her.

 

Plus, she was waiting for the Dark Hour for the big event she had planned.

 

Until then, she simply wandered the city. Her plans didn’t involve returning to the dorm at any point. If Akihiko wanted to see her again today, then he’d have to track her down somehow.

 

After she spent a decent amount of time at the Shrine, she headed back towards the strip mall. She stopped by Hagakure to get a bowl of ramen. It was probably the first thing she had eaten since the incident, too. Eight days. Hmm… Yeah, that sounded about right. She had spent those eight days consuming coffee over anything else. Maybe a small snack here and there. She still felt a little too sick to her stomach to eat much of anything. But she would force herself to eat now because that’s what Shinjiro would do. He was gone, so she had to make sure to take care of herself now. Even if she didn’t really care.

 

Once she finished eating, she returned to Iwatodai Station so that she could return to Port Island. And once she was back there, since she still had plenty of time to kill, she figured she would go to the movies. The theatre was hosting a tear-jerker marathon, which she wasn’t looking forward to, but it’s not like she really had anything else to do at this point. Not yet, at least.

 

By the time the marathon ended, it was nearing 6:30 in the evening. The others obviously had to be home by now. Akihiko was probably just starting to wonder where she was at, too. And she very well could’ve gone back to the dorm, but she had a feeling being able to sneak out for the Dark Hour would be nearly impossible. Then again, she could just tell them she wasn’t feeling up for Tartarus if they chose to go. Hmm. Maybe she would do that.

 

“Yo,” Akihiko greeted her once she finally returned to the dorm. “You were out later than usual. Get caught up with something?”

 

“Uhm…” She subconsciously wiggled her fingers. “Yeah.”

 

“What happened to your hand?” he said, having noticed the movement.

 

“Oh. I punched out some punk in the alley who was talking shit.”

 

“Well, that doesn’t seem very sensible,” Ken spoke up.

 

Akihiko’s eyes widened. “Seriously, Kiri, what were you thinking?”

 

She only shrugged in response. “How are exams going?”

 

Yukari looked around the lounge, waiting for someone to speak up. When no one did, she sighed. “Halfway over.”

 

“It’s been a long week,” Junpei went on.

 

“Don’t worry,” Fuuka said, “it’ll be over before you know it.”

 

“Will we be going to Tartarus tonight?” Kirika changed the subject again.

 

“Not tonight,” Mitsuru said. “We won’t be going until exams are over.”

 

She nodded. “Right. That makes sense.” She paused, looking around the lounge. “Well, I’ve had a really long day, so I’m gonna turn in early.”

 

With that, she made her way to the third floor. Akihiko was at her heel before she even reached her bedroom door.

 

“Hey, are you feeling okay?” he said.

 

“I’m fine. Why?”

 

“You never ask about Tartarus.”

 

She paused. “I just feel like it’s been a while since we last went.”

 

“That’s never made you question it before.”

 

“You’re overanalysing it, Aki.”

 

“Yeah, maybe…” He took her bruised hand in his. “Do you just go looking for fights or something?”

 

“I may have gone looking for this one.” She shrugged her shoulders casually. “Needed to hit someone.” She couldn’t think of any other excuse as to why she would’ve gone to the back alley.

 

“You should probably ice it. Let me—”

 

“Aki, it’s fine.” She kissed him on the cheek. “Goodnight.”

 

He smiled, blushing lightly. “G-goodnight.”

 

She entered her bedroom. And then she waited.

 

It was a little after 11:30 when she finally emerged. She left her door open just a crack and crept downstairs. Luckily, everyone else had already gone to bed. So, she was able to sneak right out of the dorm without any complications. She then made her way towards Iwatodai Station. Once she was in Port Island, she headed for the Moonlight Bridge.

 

“All right, Nishioka, you gotta do this,” she said once she arrived at the bridge. “You’ve been crossing this bridge for a couple months now, but it’s time to do it on your own. Just like you’ve done every other damn thing on your own for the last six and a half years of your godforsaken life.” She took a deep breath. “Okay. As soon as the Dark Hour starts, you have to cross this bridge. Got it, Idun? No more letting it define us.” She checked her wristwatch. 11:57. “Only three more minutes.” She rolled her shoulders. “Damn it, pull yourself together, Nishioka.” 11:58. “Face your fears head-on. Just like Shinji faced death head-on. You two are one and the same, after all. So, if he could do it, then you can do it, too.” 11:59. She started the countdown. And she used the last five seconds to take a deep breath. Then she took a single step onto the bridge. “See? This isn’t so bad. It isn’t so hard to do alone.” She continued her way across, moving slowly. She could tell that Idun was uncomfortable, but that didn’t stop her. She couldn’t let that stop her. “I know you tend to tell me what’s best for me, Idun, but that doesn’t mean I should let you control every aspect of my life. Okay. I can’t let you control it. Control me. And starting right now,” she stepped off the bridge and turned to face it, “we are independent entities sharing a soul.” She smiled proudly.

 

Then she made her way for the brick house. It was finally time.

 

As soon as she reached the house, she didn’t hesitate. She climbed in through the broken window and headed straight up to the attic. She sat before the box and pulled out the small key.

 

She swallowed hard and took a deep breath. “Ready, Shinji?”

 

Kirika placed the key into the lock and turned it. There was a soft _click_ , and the box lifted slightly. She opened it the rest of the way and covered her mouth with her hand as soon as the out of tune music began to play. Tears instantly brimmed her eyes as she pushed the box away. Every memory she had been blocking out for the last six and a half years suddenly came flooding back to her.

 

There was a hand on her shoulder. She didn’t have to look to know who it was.

 

“The very first time I saw this place, I thought it seemed familiar,” she started. “It felt as if I had been here before. Turns out this is where I once lived. Go figure… I must’ve forced myself to forget about it since nothing good ever came of this godforsaken place.” She paused. “One of the first times I stayed here when I had returned, I came across this box. I was intrigued by it right away. Shinji never understood why. I never got the chance to find the key, though, and then he gave it to me the night before he was killed.”

 

“And you waited until just now to come back and open it?” Akihiko said, kneeling beside her.

 

She shrugged her shoulders, still holding back the tears. “I figured it could be a sort of coming of age gift from him.”

 

“Coming of age?”

 

“I turned eighteen today.”

 

“Hmm.” He picked the small box up once the music stopped and reset it so that it would play again. “A music box.”

 

“It was the single thing my parents ever gave to me.”

 

“In eleven years, they only gave you one thing?”

 

“Yeah. Aside from the essentials, like clothes and whatnot, but even those were scarce.” She shook her head, wiping tears away. “That’s beside the point.”

 

“Kiri—” He stopped himself, sighing. He seemed to be trying to find the proper words. “What exactly happened to your parents?”

 

She paused. “I once asked Shinji what he knew about this place. All he could tell me was that there was a rumour that two people had been killed in this house and that was why this whole neighbourhood was abandoned.” She paused. “That’s only half true.”

 

“Wait, are you saying your parents are the people from the rumour?”

 

She let out a heavy, shaky sigh. “Remember when you asked if I had memories with my parents and I said they weren’t really around much?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“My parents weren’t very good people.”

 

“Yeah, I think you’ve mentioned that before, too.”

 

“Yeah, well, they were con artists. Scammers. Tch. I’m not even sure if they ever wanted me in the first place because they ignored me more than half the time. The only time they acknowledged me was when they needed me to help them in their schemes. As the child left behind. The lost child. The scared child.” She clenched her jaw. “The preyed upon child.” She squeezed her eyes shut. “They scammed primarily older woman. Those who could’ve most likely been mothers themselves, seeing as they would have a softer spot for children. One of their scams caught up to them, though. This particular woman had two older brothers, and they came after my parents. It was the same night I awakened to my powers. It must’ve been the very first time I ever felt as if I was in any sort of life-threatening danger, because that’s what triggered Idun.”

 

“You protected your parents?” he spoke up.

 

“Not exactly.” She swallowed hard. “Rather than threaten my parents themselves, these two men decided they would threaten me. Except my parents didn’t care enough to even try to save me. Before the men could anything, though, the Dark Hour started. The men transmogrified, leaving only myself and my parents aware. That was when Idun emerged for the first time.”

 

“Even though you weren’t in any sort of danger anymore?”

 

“That’s the thing; I still wasn’t safe. Like I said, my parents weren’t good people. So Idun still thought she needed to protect me. But the sight of her obviously freaked my parents out, and that’s when it happened. Not that I remember.”

 

He paused, breathing deep. “You blacked out.”

 

She nodded. “Exactly. The last thing I do physically remember was my father practically lunging at me with a gun in his hand. Then…nothing. Next thing I knew, my father was dead, a-and my mother was pissed. She was screaming at me. I’m not even sure exactly what she said; I hadn’t been able to listen. I was way too freaked out. So, I made a run for it. My mother went after me, though. Or she tried to, at least. She couldn’t keep up with me. Idun wouldn’t let me stop or slow down, despite how exhausted I felt. Didn’t help that Shadows began to follow us, as well. Soon enough, Idun created a barrier between my mother and the Shadows. Last thing I heard was her screaming, so I can only assume she—” She stopped herself, the words getting caught in her throat. “Either way, I guess you could say I’m the reason I lost my parents. Not that is was much of a loss. After all, there aren’t even any records of me having ever been born. They never even bothered to name me. They only ever referred to me as _the girl_ , and that was on their good days.”

 

“And on their bad days?”

 

“I was _the nuisance_. Then I only came up with Kirika Nishioka the first time I was taken in by the police.”

 

“That’s awful.”

 

“Well, what can you do?” She shrugged her shoulders. “I’ve been on the run ever since that fateful night. I also refused to remember anything about it. Pretty sure Idun was able to block out the memories for me as a form of protection. For the most part, at least. They would come back in flashes. Nightmares.”

 

“So…that’s why you resent your powers,” he said.

 

“That would be why.”

 

“And you don’t like getting close to people because—”

 

“Because that’s what I learned from my parents. Trust no one because no one is worth it. Because people only ever look out for themselves. So, that’s what I did. I looked out for myself.”

 

“And what does the music box have to do with this? Aside from it being the only thing they ever gave you?”

 

“This music box was my treasure. I adored it. And they took it away from me the very same morning all that shit went down because I screwed up their most recent scheme.” She shook her head. “I guess this was where they hid it.” She pushed the box even further away and got to her feet. “If only I could’ve gotten my childhood back.”

 

“Hmm.” Another pause. “None of this will change how I feel about you.”

 

“That’s because you’re an idiot.”

 

He smiled. “I can live with that. So…do you think you can live with the truth?”

 

“Honestly, I don’t want to. I still want to forget everything. But I don’t think—I think I’m gonna have to accept it. I mean, it’s a part of my past whether I want it to be or not. It’s part of who I am. Part of why I’m here and how I’ve grown.” She closed her eyes, placing her hand to her chest. Idun was stirring within her in a way she had never moved before. “It isn’t just about me anymore.”

 

There was a flash of light, and it felt as if time had come to a standstill. _It is time for you to reach your full potential_. Idun continued stirring within her until she transformed into—

 

Persephone.

 

Kirika opened her eyes with a shaky breath once the feeling within her chest subsided. She looked towards Akihiko before stepping up to him. She threw her arms around his neck and kissed him. Hard. Akihiko wrapped his arms around her waist as he kissed her back.

 

“What just happened?” he said once they broke apart.

 

“I’m not sure, but somehow…I’ve never felt better.”

 

He smiled. “We should get back to the dorm. The Dark Hour should be ending soon.”

 

“Yeah, I guess you’re right.” She pulled away from him. “Let’s go.”

 

“Hold on.” He knelt down again, closing the music box and picking it up. Then he rose back to his feet. “Now we can go.”

 

“Oh, uhm…you can just leave that here.”

 

“I’m not going to, though.”

 

“I don’t need those memories.”

 

“But you do need the last thing Shinji gave you.”

 

She sighed. “Fine.”

 

“We’ll keep it out of sight.”

 

With that, they exited the house. Once they were outside, Kirika looked back at it.

 

“This is the last time I’ll ever lay eyes on this place,” she said. “I refuse to come back here again after tonight.”

 

“You don’t have to. No one’s forcing you.”

 

She nodded, swallowing hard. “I know…”

 

Akihiko stepped up to her and took her hand in his. There was that spark, and comfort swept through her. _Persephone_ felt at peace with herself, and it was the first time in her life she felt as such. Kirika smiled sheepishly, squeezing Akihiko’s hand gently. When he squeezed back, she knew it wasn’t a dream. It wasn’t a nightmare. This was reality, and she was gonna be all right. She was gonna be safe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All right. This is a pretty big chapter in terms of events. It's probably my most revised chapter, too, because it took a lot for me to figure out exactly how I wanted it to play out....what I wanted Kirika's background to be. I also obviously wanted it to still kinda make sense with the background of the game itself and, honestly, I'm still not sure if it really does or not, but oh well, haha All I know is that I changed it at least three or four times before finally being content with it. Now I just hope finally learning about her mysterious past was worth the wait.


	75. October 18th, 2009

With the sense of resolve still swirling inside her, Kirika spent the next couple of days around the city doing readings. And something about them felt so much more intriguing, to even her, as she recited to stranger after stranger their personalities and futures and everything the readings entailed. It all felt so much more accurate than it ever had before. It was almost as if facing the truth about her past and revealing it to someone else had helped her reach a new level of spirituality.

 

“Welcome back, Nishioka-san,” Fuuka greeted her one evening after she had been out all day. “How was your day?”

 

“Uhm…busy,” she said, trying to be as vague as possible.

 

“I bet. I saw you conversing with a lot of different people outside the strip mall.”

 

“Huh. That doesn’t sound like you,” Junpei said.

 

“Shut up, Iori. And yeah, Yamagishi, that’s exactly what I was busy with.” Well, so much for vagueness.

 

Yukari smiled thoughtfully. “What were you doing?”

 

“Palm readings and tarot readings.”

 

Fuuka’s eyes widened a bit. “You do stuff like that?”

 

“It’s how I earn money, but these last couple of days have been different.”

 

“So, is that what you usually do when you’re gone?” Junpei said.

 

“Most of the time, yeah.”

 

“That’s so cool,” Yukari said. “Are you saving up for anything in particular?”

 

“Just travel expenses, really.”

 

“Travel expenses?” Mitsuru repeated. “Aren’t there more important things to be focusing on? Like defeating the last of the Shadows, for instance.”

 

“Well, sure, but there’s only one shadow left. So that means I have to start thinking about my next move. Y’know, where I’ll be heading once this is all over.”

 

Akihiko suddenly got to his feet. “What?”

 

She looked up at him, a bit taken aback. “What?”

 

“I-I mean—You think you’ll be able to earn enough money in less than a month?”

 

“Uhm, I’ve been saving almost since I got into the city. I should have plenty of money by the time I decide to leave.”

 

“Hey, you okay, Senpai?” Junpei then said to Akihiko.

 

“I’m fine,” he said.

 

“You do not seem it,” Aigis spoke up.

 

“Well, I am.”

 

Akihiko then walked away, heading upstairs. The others looked to Kirika. She chuckled nervously before following after him. And she managed to slip into his room right before he slammed his door shut.

 

“Okay. What the hell is going on?” she said.

 

“You’re still planning on leaving?”

 

“Well—”

 

“Y’know, you can’t keep your promise to Shinji if you’re not around.”

 

She let out a shaky breath. “I just…still don’t know.”

 

He stepped up to her, bringing a hand up to brush her hair out of her face before lightly tracing her jawline. She closed her eyes at his touch. The spark. She waited for him to do something else—something more—but he only kept the tips of his fingers on her jaw, unmoving.

 

“Okay,” he spoke up.

 

She opened her eyes to look back at him. “Okay?”

 

He paused. “I can’t force you to stay.” His arm dropped back down to his side. “I guess I’ve been trying to deny that, but…I can’t. So, if you still want to leave by the time this is all over and done with, I won’t try to stop you.”

 

“Aki—”

 

“Until then, though, I don’t wanna think about it.”

 

She nodded. “If that’s what you want.”

 

“It is. But…what do you want?”

 

She chuckled. “You’d think I’d know by now.”

 

He smiled, though there was a hint of sadness behind it. He then kissed her forehead before resting his own against hers.

 

“We’re making this more difficult than we need to, aren’t we?” he said.

 

“Maybe.” She stepped away from him, taking a deep breath. “You’re right, though. We can’t think too much about this.”

 

“Let’s stop talking about it, then.”

 

“Right.” She paused. “Guess I’ll just…see myself out now.”

 

Kirika walked over to the door and began to open it. Akihiko came up behind her and closed it. She turned to face him, ready to respond to his actions but unable to find her voice. He then closed the distance between them and kissed her, gently pushing her against the door. One hand was still on the doorframe while his other hand found its way to her waist. Her hands were resting on his shoulders as she kissed him back. It was deep and meaningful and she could’ve sworn it was a plea.

 

His plea for her to stay.

 

Then there was a knock at the door, and he pulled away. Her breath caught in her throat and she moved aside.

 

“Senpai?” Junpei said from the other side. Kirika opened it, startling him. “Oh, s-sorry. I didn’t mean to interrupt—”

 

“You didn’t,” she said. “I mean, you’re not interrupting anything. I was just leaving.” She turned back to Akihiko. “G’night.”

 

Akihiko nodded his head once. “Goodnight.”

 

With that, she exited the room and headed up to her own. She let out a heavy sigh as she fell onto her bed. She could practically hear Shinjiro’s voice in her ear. _Moron_. She knew he was right, too. What she didn’t know was whether she was doing it deliberately or not. Would she intentionally sabotage herself? Was she really that used to being alone? Was she that used to feeling safer when she wasn’t attached to anyone?

 

“Help me, Persephone,” she said. “Idun always protected me from the rest of the world, but now you need to protect me from myself. So please…help me escape this.”

 


	76. October 24th, 2009

Kirika and Akihiko didn’t see much of each other over the course of the next few days. She was too busy deciphering strangers’ traits and futures, and he was too busy with his new training regimen. Plus, the group was spending more nights at Tartarus to make up for not being able to go during exams week.

 

Finally, they decided to stay home for the night. Everyone was too tired to spend another night in Tartarus so soon. That same night, Kirika decided to take it easy rather than go out for the late-night crowd. But Akihiko was still out and about, training. Nothing would ever slow him down.

 

“Hello, Sanada-san,” Ken greeted him when he finally did return to the dorm for the evening.

 

“Hey,” Akihiko said back.

 

Kirika was sitting in the armchair facing away from the door. She didn’t look up when Akihiko came in, either. She just continued reading the book she had started that same morning. But then his gloved hands were in her line of sight, so she stopped as he clasped something around her neck. She put the book on her lap and looked down at herself to see the small key on a chain. She then turned so she was now kneeling on the chair—the book falling to the floor—and facing Akihiko. He was smiling.

 

“Happy late birthday,” he said.

 

She practically jumped out of the chair as she hugged him. He laughed, holding her until her feet met the ground.

 

“Thank you,” she said after pulling away.

 

“It’s not much, but—”

 

“No, it’s just enough.”

 

“Nishioka-san, it was your birthday recently?” Fuuka spoke up.

 

“Last week,” she said. “No need to make a big deal out of it, though. And by that, I mean please don’t.”

 

“What did you get her, Akihiko?” Mitsuru said.

 

“Just the chain,” he said. “Shinji gave her the key the night before he was killed. It’s kind of a long story between the two of them, but I had it turned into a necklace for her.”

 

Yukari smiled. “Senpai, that’s so sweet.”

 

Junpei also smiled, though his was haughtier. “Man, that was so smooth. You literally swept her off her feet.”

 

Kirika blushed. “Shut up, Iori. It’s just a gift from one friend to another.”

 

Just then, Koromaru barked.

 

“He says, ‘It does not seem to be that way.’” Aigis translated.

 

“Tch. What do you know?”

 

At this, Koromaru whimpered a little.

 

Junpei patted the dog. “She doesn’t mean it, buddy.”

 

She shook her head, chuckling. Then she faced Akihiko again. “Thank you.”

 

“You’re welcome.”

 

With that, he walked away to make himself dinner, and she returned to the armchair. She picked up the book and continued reading, though she couldn’t help but be distracted by the new chain around her neck. She kept fidgeting with the small key, forgetting all about the world she was reading about and focusing on the world she was living in. She felt like a normal teenage girl again.

 

She really loved feeling normal.


	77. October 29th, 2009

After another few days of conversing with stranger after stranger, Kirika let herself take a break. She spent the day at the mall, browsing the record shop and going to the arcade. She debated trying out karaoke, but decided against it. And once she knew classes were out, she made her way back to the dorm without making any stops. During her walk, she noticed an alarming amount of people suffering from Apathy Syndrome spread around Port Island and Iwatodai. More than had seen over the last six months.

 

“The Lost are seriously increasing in number,” she said once she arrived at the dorm. “It’s a bit frightening considering how many I saw on the walk here.”

 

“Yes, I’ve taken notice, as well,” the Chairman said. “But the full moon is only a few days away and it should be the last Shadow.”

 

Akihiko smiled eagerly. “I can’t wait. It’ll all be over soon.”

 

“Not gonna lie, this is the most nerve-wracking battle of them all,” Yukari said. “I doubt it’s gonna be easy.”

 

“It’ll most likely be eventful, too,” Mitsuru went on. “I can only assume Strega will show up and attempt to stop us from finishing off the final Shadow.”

 

“Tch. Good,” Akihiko said. “I’m gonna give them hell for what they did to Shinji.”

 

“I think we’ll all be fighting for him this time around,” Ken spoke up.

 

At this, Koromaru barked. Kirika smiled bittersweetly, walking over to him and kneeling to pet him. “Do you all feel ready for this final battle?” she then said.

 

Junpei smiled. “Sure do. I’m ready to give it my all.”

 

“I am prepared to end the Dark Hour,” Aigis said.

 

“Me too,” Fuuka said.

 

“And what about you, Arisato?” Kirika went on.

 

Minato shrugged his shoulders. “Yeah.”

 

She chuckled a bit. “I am, too.” She looked around at the group. “We’re not losing anyone else.” Her eyes landed on Akihiko. “Not while I’m around.”

 

“It’s good to hear all of you feeling so confident about this battle,” the Chairman said. “I’m proud of everything this group has accomplished.”

 

Kirika paused as that comment sunk in. She glanced over her shoulder at the Chairman as he looked around the room. Then his eyes met with hers. There was a certain gleam to them. He was proud, all right, but it almost seemed…greedy? Selfish. She thought back to the reading she had done for him back in July. Persephone was trying to put the pieces together, but something just wasn’t fitting properly—

 

“Something on your mind?” he broke the silence.

 

She tore her gaze away from him and set it on Koromaru. “No—Nothing.” She could feel every set of eyes on her. She swallowed hard. _Prick_. She was the centre of attention now, and she had to deter it quickly. “Guess I was just wondering about the aftermath.”

 

“I think I know what you mean, Nishioka-san,” Fuuka spoke up. Hell, Kirika had never been so thankful. “I’ve been avoiding the question, but…” Fuuka went on, “what will happen to SEES after this last full moon?”

 

“The group will most likely disband,” Mitsuru said without skipping a beat. “After all, there’d really be no reason to keep it going.”

 

“Man, that kinda sucks,” Junpei said. “I mean, it’ll be great having saved the world and all, but…” He sighed. “I dunno, maybe it’s just me.”

 

“It’s not,” Yukari said. “For once, I actually know what you mean.”

 

Kirika took a deep breath as she listened to the group converse. Hell, it was almost over. And that meant—She looked back at Akihiko to find that he was already staring at her. He smiled and she forced a smile in return. She was sure he wasn’t thinking about it, but she couldn’t stop. Originally, her plan was to take off and continue with her travels once this was all over. But now…

 

She suddenly felt Koromaru nuzzling her. She looked down at him and petted him more so he would believe she was okay.

 

“Don’t you agree, Nishioka-san?” she then heard Ken say.

 

“Huh?” she said back. “Oh. Sorry. I-I guess I lost track of the conversation.”

 

“Are you feeling all right?” Akihiko spoke up.

 

“Just a little tired.”

 

“Maybe you should head to bed, then.”

 

“Maybe…” She paused. “What were you asking about, Amada?”

 

“Don’t you agree that the city’s gonna be a better place once the Dark Hour is over?”

 

“Oh. Uhm… Yeah, I’m sure it will be.”

 

“Will you be sticking around to see the aftermath?” Mitsuru said.

 

“Hmm?” The Chairman cocked an eyebrow. “What does she mean by that?”

 

“N-nothing.” Kirika shook her head. “I’m gonna do what Aki just suggested, though, and head to bed now. It’s been a pretty long day.”

 

She gave Koromaru one last pat on the head before standing and making her way up to the third floor. She entered her room and let out a heavy sigh. These last six and a half months passed by much more quickly than she ever anticipated. She had been under the assumption she would have more time… More time for what, though? She had never wanted extra time before? So, what was different now?

 

Tch. Who was she kidding? She knew exactly what was different. There were people here who she had grown attached to. People who had managed to change her mindset. Now she almost couldn’t imagine changing back. At the same time, though, she feared this new attitude of hers. And she hated everything about that.


	78. November 2nd, 2009

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shit, can't believe we're into November already x.x  
> Don't know about the rest of you--my readers (however many or little of you there are)--but uploading this by date has really helped move the year right along, haha  
> Either way, October was a pretty light month, but November should be seeing a lot of updates. Stay tuned x3

That night, the group found themselves gathered in the lounge. It was the evening before the final full moon. A quiet evening. Somber. The day to come was on everyone’s minds. Every possible outcome weighing down.

 

“Well, tomorrow will be our last operation,” Fuuka spoke up.

 

“Yeah,” Yukari said. “We’ve been through a lot this last six months, don’t you think?”

 

“It went by quickly,” Minato said.

 

“Yeah, huh.”

 

“It was a lot better than doing nothing, right?” Junpei said. “Besides, we made some new friends.”

 

“Yeah, I guess,” Ken said.

 

“Well, it’s all been worth it, if you ask me,” Akihiko said. “It’s been two and a half years since I got this power and you don’t hear me complaining.”

 

“Sanada-san…”

 

Koromaru barked in response.

 

“Two and a half years is a long time,” Fuuka said. “Oh, wait… For Aigis, it’s been even longer, huh?”

 

“I was asleep for much of the time, so I have not been in operation for very long,” Aigis said.

 

“How about you, Mitsuru-senpai?” Junpei went on. “You started before Akihiko-san, right?”

 

“Me?” Mitsuru said. “Yes, it was just me at first. Of course, back then, SEES didn’t exist, and this was just a regular dorm.”

 

“Did the Chairman recruit you?” Yukari said.

 

“No. I’ve been aware of the Dark Hour since I was a child.” She paused. “One time, my father’s research team was attacked by Shadows. That’s when I awakened to my Persona; when I witnessed the incident.”

 

“That’s what happened?”

 

She nodded. “Nishioka, didn’t you say you awakened to your Persona at a young age, as well?”

 

Kirika almost jolted at the inquiry. “Uhm—” She shook her head, having been caught off guard. “Y-yeah, I did. I was eleven. I was aware of the Dark Hour before my awakening, though.”

 

“That’s right…” Junpei chuckled. “The first day you joined, you freaked out and stormed off because you didn’t wanna talk about it.”

 

“It wasn’t funny,” Akihiko said.

 

He cleared his throat. “Sorry.”

 

“Would you be willing to tell us now what had happened?” Mitsuru went on.

 

Kirika took a deep breath. “Well—”

 

“Don’t feel obligated,” Akihiko said.

 

“Oh, of course,” Mitsuru said. “I’m not trying to force you to tell us.”

 

“N-no, it’s fine. I mean, I think you all deserve to know by this point.” Akihiko then took her hand in his. “Uhm. It was the night my parents died.” She took a deep breath. “Long story short, they were con artists. They tried scamming this woman using me, and she had brothers who came after my parents. It must’ve been the first time I ever felt like I was in any sort of real danger. Idun emerged, and I—I blacked out.”

 

“Like when you got shot?” Fuuka spoke up.

 

“Exactly. And when I beat the shit out of the guy—” She looked around at the others as they gawked at her. She almost forgot they didn’t know about that incident. “Yeah, that’s another story. The point is that—”

 

“No, no, no,” Junpei said. “C’mon, now I wanna hear about you beating the shit out of some guy.”

 

She rolled her eyes. “What does it matter? It was just one of the punks who hung out at the back alley. He attacked me first, and Idun went into defence mode. I came out with a concussion while he came out in critical condition. Not sure if he’s been released from the hospital or not yet, just know he’s being sent away after for the fact that he attacked me.” She shrugged her shoulders. “I’ve dealt with worse.”

 

Junpei smiled. “That’s pretty awesome.”

 

“Getting back to my original story,” she went on. “It had almost been the same with this scenario. The brothers threatened me in lieu of my parents thinking that that would get a reaction out of them, but it became the Dark Hour before they could do any real harm. Not that my parents had been willing to stop them anyhow… Cue Idun.” She paused as she sorted through her thoughts. “Obviously having no idea what was going on, my father freaked out. Suddenly, I was the threat. That was when I blacked out.” She pursed her lips. “When I came to, my father was dead. My mother then proceeded to practically chase me out of the city.” She paused again, this time waiting for someone to make some sort of comment. When no one spoke up, she continued. “There were Shadows chasing us at the same. Idun created a barrier to protect me that my mother got caught behind, giving the Shadows the chance to attack her. Or I assume they did, at least. Last thing I heard was screaming.” Another shrug. “Either way, I essentially killed my parents, even if it wasn’t on purpose. And I hated thinking about it. I did my best to block out every single one of those memories, but now… I dunno. I guess I’m over it? Can’t go back and change it or undo it, after all.” She paused again, almost amused by her own nonchalant attitude. “Oh, and that’s why that neighbourhood north of Iwatodai—the one nearby the underground facility that one full moon operation took place at—was abandoned. My parents and I lived in the one of the houses there.” She chuckled halfheartedly. “Ironically enough, that same house was mine and Shinji’s hideout.”

 

“It seemed you and Shinjiro had a lot in common, after all,” Mitsuru spoke up.

 

“Tch. No kidding.”

 

“That’s a pretty incredible story,” Junpei said.

 

“Wait, you said your parents used you for cons?” Fuuka went on.

 

Kirika nodded. “Yeah, they did. Guess it was the only thing I was good for. I mean, they never even bothered naming me. I came up with Kirika Nishioka on my own. There aren’t even any records of me being born. At this point, only hospital records.”

 

“Yes, I do remember the Chairman mentioning that to me when you first joined,” Mitsuru said. “He said it was quite literally impossible for him to find any information whatsoever on you.”

 

“Sounds about right. As far as the rest of the world is concerned, I do not exist. Not that it really matters at this point.”

 

“I’m sorry, but that’s awful,” Yukari said. “No wonder you grew up learning not to trust anyone.”

 

Ken nodded. “It does make a lot more sense now.”

 

“Yes, I would have to agree,” Mitsuru said. She paused. “All in all, though, it seems I was still the first to awaken,” she then went on. “If that incident had never happened, perhaps none of you would have to bear this terrible burden.”

 

“Senpai…” Fuuka said.

 

“It would’ve happened to someone eventually,” Akihiko said. “Besides, the enemy can’t just be ignored.”

 

Mitsuru sighed. “I suppose that’s true.”

 

“All I know is that I’m ready to be rid of these powers,” Kirika said.

 

Junpei’s eyes widened a bit. “Seriously?”

 

She nodded as if it should’ve been obvious. “Ever since that shit with my parents, I’ve just sort of resented my abilities.”

 

“Even though your parents weren’t good people?”

 

“That ain’t the point here, Iori.”

 

“So, you have always resented your powers,” Aigis said.

 

“Basically, yeah.”

 

“Well, tomorrow night should be the last time you’ll ever have to use them.” Akihiko looked to the rest of the group. “Make sure you know what you’re fighting for.”

 

“I’m going to fight for my mom,” Ken said. “And Shinjiro-san.”

 

Mitsuru smiled sheepishly. “Thank you all for everything you’ve done. Let’s do our best in the last battle.”

 

Kirika took a deep breath, nodding. Then she felt Akihiko squeeze her hand gently. She looked over at him to see him smiling softly at her. She returned the smile.

 

She wasn’t gonna let anyone down this battle. If it was the last time she would be able to summon Persephone, she would make the most of it.


	79. November 3rd, 2009

It was the night of the final operation. The group was gathered in the Command Room, along with the Chairman.

 

“I found it,” Fuuka spoke up. “It’s currently at the south end of the Moonlight Bridge. The twelfth and final Shadow.”

 

The Moonlight Bridge. Perhaps that was why Idun had always been so wary of it. Maybe she had known the final battle would be taking place there. Either way, Kirika shook it off. As did Persephone.

 

“Tch. Of course it’s on the frigging bridge,” she muttered to Akihiko. He responded with a reassuring smile.

 

“Hmm. This is it…” the Chairman said.

 

“And as we expected,” Fuuka went on, “there are two Persona-users nearby. Strega.”

 

“They know this is their last chance,” Mitsuru said. “Even though we were expecting this, we should still be careful.”

 

Ken sneered. “Those bastards…”

 

“Hmph. Saves us the trouble of looking for them,” Akihiko said.

 

“You’ve all done a fine job up to this point,” Mitsuru said. “This will be our last operation. Let’s all come back safely.”

 

“Don’t worry,” Kirika said. “I’ll make sure of it.”

 

The group made some final preparations before moving out, heading for the Moonlight Bridge without delay. As soon as they arrived, they came across Takaya and Jin.

 

“You know the significance of today, do you not?” Takaya started. “You claim you hunt the Shadows to prevent the disaster they bring. Yet, countless lives are lost each day without their intervention.” He paused. “The power we wield is not itself evil; you cannot deny that. So, why don’t you just admit it? You do not wish to eliminate the Dark Hour. You are merely deceiving yourselves.”

 

“That’s not true,” Minato said.

 

“Look within yourselves and you shall see.” He paused, and then shook his head when no one in the group spoke up. “You are indeed foolish children. Erasing the Dark Hour is the same as erasing yourselves. Tch. Is even that beyond your comprehension? As I believed, our goals are irreconcilable.” He pulled out his Evoker. “Jin…”

 

“Forget these maggots,” Jin spoke up.

 

“Fate shall decide who will prevail. Come.”

 

With that, they went into battle with Takaya and Jin.

 

“Now, you shall be judged,” Takaya said.

 

“There’s no cure for stupidity,” Jin said.

 

Kirika stood by Fuuka’s side, hand hovering over her Evoker like it always did during any battle. Except this time around, she wasn’t too concerned with the opponents.

 

They both made their lackluster remarks each time they took a hit. _It appears you have more than just luck on your side_. _Play time’s over, kids; it’s time for the real deal_. _I never imagined that your power would rival ours…astonishing…perhaps I misjudged your strength_. _Oh, you’re gonna pay for this_. _Ugh…so this is the power of those whose Persona awakened naturally_. _Shit, these guys are tougher than I thought._ Each remark let Kirika understand better just what they were dealing with.

 

Soon enough, the group took the two of them down.

 

“Damn it…” Jin said. “Is their power that different than ours?”

 

“Different?” Mitsuru said.

 

“For us, it’s not that simple. It has to be forced out. Didn’t your pal tell you?”

 

Akihiko’s face darkened. “So, it was you who was giving Shinji those pills.”

 

“You guys don’t have the slightest clue what will happen if the Dark Hour disappears, do you?” Jin went on, ignoring Akihiko’s comment. “It won’t matter for normal people since they don’t remember anything anyway. But for us—”

 

“That’s enough,” Takaya stopped him. “Now, then… Ordinarily, we’d withdraw, but not tonight.” He pulled his actual revolver out. Kirika’s hand was still hovering over her own Evoker, and she grabbed a hold of it when she noticed Akihiko had moved just a couple steps closer to her. “This body,” Takaya went on, “as ephemeral as it is… It is worthless without my power.” He put the gun up to his own head. “Therefore, only one choice remains… I shall prove my existence here and now.” Jin darted forward, pulling his arm away. Takaya looked almost shocked. “What are you doing?”

 

“Don’t be so reckless,” Jin said.

 

“Jin…”

 

“Sorry, but…those are your words, not mine.” He looked back towards the group. “You win. Looks like you’ll get your wish. Go do what you came for.”

 

The two of them backed up to the railing of the bridge.

 

“Wait!” Junpei called out.

 

Jin only scoffed. “I’d rather die than surrender to you. Take a good look. This is how we live.”

 

They leaned back, toppling off the bridge. Kirika rushed up to the railing and looked over the edge. Both of them had already disappeared into the blood-red sea below.

 

“They jumped…” Yukari said.

 

“What they hell were they thinking?” Junpei said.

 

“They chose their own fate,” Akihiko said. “Don’t let it faze you.”

 

Kirika moved away from the ledge. “They got what they had coming to them. Even if it was their own choice of karma.”

 

“The operation has only begun,” Mitsuru went on. “Our true adversary is waiting. Focus on that, all right?”

 

They all looked towards the other end of the bridge to see the Shadow practically floating in the sky.

 

“The Shadow up ahead is not moving, at the moment,” Fuuka said. “It’ll all be over if you can defeat it.”

 

“When they defeat it,” Kirika said.

 

So, they made their way towards the Shadow. Once they reached it, it dropped down to hover over them.

 

“This is it,” Fuuka spoke up. “I’ll do everything in my power to help you. Just promise me that you’ll be careful.”

 

With that, they entered the battle with the Shadow. Kirika was more than focused, her hand clutching her Evoker. If she were to be needed, she was gonna be ready to jump right in. No doubt about it. Any injury that needed healing or shield that needed to go up… Nothing was going to distract her this time. She was here for a reason. She was a part of this team for a reason. Like hell she was gonna let that reason go to waste.

 

Before she knew it, the Shadow had been defeated.

 

Everyone was silent at first.

 

“Is it over?” Junpei spoke up.

 

“Operation completed,” Aigis said. “Or should I say, ‘Mission complete.’”

 

“Yes,” Mitsuru said. “It’s finally over…”

 

“I believe a celebration is in order.” Aigis looked over the small group. “What will be our victory cheer?”

 

Minato paused. “Can we go home now?”

 

“One…two…three… Can we go home now?”

 

Everyone started laughing.

 

“What was that?” Yukari said.

 

“That was pretty good,” Kirika said. “Although, I do agree with Arisato.”

 

“So, uhm, Senpai… You’re gonna throw us a party tomorrow, right?” Junpei then said, not as ashamed for asking as he probably should have been.

 

Mitsuru sighed. “You don’t waste any time, do you?” She thought for a moment. “Well, I suppose I could arrange for it.”

 

“In that case, how about sushi?”

 

“Sushi, huh… It’s been a while…” Akihiko paused, thinking. “Well, I’ve got dibs on the halibut and sea urchin.”

 

“Oh, then I call the fatty tuna,” Yukari said.

 

Fuuka looked a little surprised. “Uhm, we’re divvying it up already? In that case, save me the salmon roe.”

 

“Hey, wait a minute…” Junpei said. “You can’t do that.”

 

“I reserve the shrimp, squid, scallops, and sea eel,” Aigis said.

 

“Hey, that’s not fair. You don’t even eat.”

 

Kirika smiled. “Then I’ll take Aigis’ share.”

 

“You should all be ashamed of yourselves, fighting over sushi,” Ken said. “Senpai, please order tamago for me. They say you can tell a chef’s skill by how he prepares eggs.”

 

“Uhm, how old are you again?” Yukari said.

 

“Okay, okay.” Mitsuru chuckled. “I’ll have the very best delivered tomorrow.”

 

“For real?” Junpei grinned. “Awe man, it’s great to be alive.”

 

“Don’t get too excited, Junpei,” Yukari said. “You’re getting the leftovers.”

 

“What? But it was my idea in the first place.”

 

The group laughed again.

 

Mitsuru turned to look up at the full moon. “I guess it’s time to say goodbye to the Dark Hour. Even though it seemed like a curse, for some reason I’m reluctant to let it go.”

 

Akihiko also looked towards the moon. “Yeah…”

 

“We really did it, didn’t we?” Yukari said.

 

“Yes,” Mitsuru said. “We saved the world, even if no one knows it.”

 

Finally, the group made their way back to the dorm. During the walk, Kirika fell to the back and out of the conversations. Soon enough, Akihiko slowed down to join her.

 

“It’s over,” he spoke up.

 

She nodded. “You did great.”

 

“So did you.”

 

“Please, I barely did anything.”

 

“That’s not true. You were that extra layer of protection. Trust me, we unanimously felt more confident in battle knowing you were right there if we needed you.”

 

“Well, I’m glad I could help the little I did.”

 

“Stop selling yourself short.”

 

“Hmm.” She put her fingers to the key around her neck, examining what was left of the Dark Hour-ridden area. “Is it just me…or did this seem almost too easy?” It wasn’t just her; it was Persephone, too.

 

“It’s not that it was easy. We’ve all just been training so hard that we were strong enough to take it down without any major complications.”

 

“Yeah, I guess so.”

 

“C’mon, Kiri, it’s finally over. Shinji would want us to be happy.”

 

“It just doesn’t seem fair.”

 

He sighed. “I know, I wish he could be here for this, too, but… He wouldn’t want us to mope. So, let’s try to make the most of this victory.”

 

She smiled half-heartedly. “Fine, you’re right.” She took his hand in hers, and that’s when he returned the smile. “I’ll make the most of it.”


	80. November 4th, 2009

The following evening, the group found themselves gathered in the dorm lounge once again. The sushi Mitsuru had ordered was spread out across the table. The atmosphere was filled with pointless conversations. Idle chatter. Questions of where Aigis and the Chairman were. Then there was the sound of a car engine stopping and doors opening and closing that traveled into the dorm from outside.

 

“That must be my father,” Mitsuru said.

 

Kirika’s eyes widened a bit. “Your father?”

 

“Yes, I invited him to join us.” She walked over to the door and the others followed suit. Three men entered the dorm. “We’ve been waiting for you,” she went on.

 

“So…it’s over at last, huh?” her father said.

 

“Yes.”

 

He nodded his head once, looking over the group. “Congratulations, everyone. You’ve done well. There are no words to express my gratitude. Though you will never receive the recognition you deserve, it is undoubtedly a monumental achievement.” His gaze scanned the room once more before landing on Kirika. That was when he stepped up to her. “You must be Kirika Nishioka.”

 

Kirika stood up a little straighter, swallowing hard. “Uhm. Y-yeah. I am.”

 

“I didn’t get the chance to meet you before. I am Mitsuru’s father, Takeharu,” he said. She smiled in response. “Thank you for protecting everyone. Who knows how far they would’ve made it without you.”

 

“Oh, I’m more than positive they would’ve made it to the end. They barely ever needed my assistance anyway.”

 

“I still very much appreciate your help.” From there, he stepped up to Yukari and took her hands in his. “To you, I owe a special thanks…for lending us your power until the very end.”

 

Yukari blushed a little. “Oh, it’s—it’s no big deal.”

 

He then returned to the officials who had accompanied him. “The twelve Shadows that were the cause of all our trouble have been destroyed, thanks to your efforts,” he started. “You needn’t bear this burden any longer. You deserve a chance to experience the joys of youth. The Specialised Extracurricular Execution Squad will be dissolved as of midnight tonight. No longer must you put your lives on the line in battle. Tomorrow, you can triumphantly return to a normal school life.” The group looked around at one another. “Is something the matter?”

 

“Oh, it’s nothing…” Akihiko said. He glanced over to Kirika, looking away before she could react.

 

“All right, everyone, it’s time to celebrate,” Mitsuru said. “Your feast awaits you. There’s no need to hold back; eat as much as you’d like.”

 

Junpei smiled. “ _Sweet_ , I’ve been waiting for you to say that.”

 

Everyone then gathered round the table to begin eating. From that moment, the evening was filled with loud exchanges and storytelling. Kirika sat back and listened, for the most part. She really only joined the conversations if someone spoke to her directly.

 

“Listen up, everyone, I have an idea,” Junpei spoke up after a while. “How about we all take a picture?” He pulled out a camera. “Actually, I tried to take one last night, but I forgot it wouldn’t work during the Dark Hour.”

 

“You mean…” Akihiko’s brow furrowed out of bewilderment, “you brought a camera with you into battle?”

 

“Well, it was our last battle, after all.” He walked over to one of the Kirijo officials. “Hey, could you take our picture?”

 

Yukari sighed. “I feel like such a tourist. But I have to admit…I kinda want a picture, too.”

 

The man took the camera and stepped back.

 

“Oh, wait…” Junpei went on. “Ikutsuki-san and Aigis aren’t here.” He shrugged after thinking for a moment. “I guess we’ll have to take another one later. All right, everyone, get together.”

 

The group and Takeharu gathered in front of the dorm’s front door.

 

“Is everyone ready?” the Kirijo Official asked.

 

“You bet,” Junpei said, moving in closer to Kirika and Mitsuru.

 

Akihiko hit him on the back of head. “Knock it off.”

 

“Awe…”

 

The Official attempted to take the picture. Junpei was having a hard time cooperating, though, his hand out in a bunny-ears pose behind Akihiko’s head.

 

“Come on, quit fooling around, Junpei,” Fuuka said.

 

“Standing a little too close there, buddy,” Kirika spoke up, pushing him away with her elbow.

 

“Knock it off, will you?” Akihiko said again.

 

Junpei then tripped backwards just as the Official snapped the camera. The picture ended up being that of the group watching Junpei fall over. He seemed a little defeated, but still in good spirits. Everyone then returned to the table.

 

“H-hey, how come nobody’s eating?” Junpei said. “Don’t tell me you’re full already.”

 

“Are you kidding?” Yukari said. “I’m stuffed.”

 

“Me too,” Fuuka said. “I couldn’t eat another bite.”

 

“How about you, Senpai?” Junpei went on.

 

Akihiko shook his head. “I’m good for now.”

 

“All right.” He shrugged his shoulders. Koromaru then walked over to him. “Oh, hungry, boy?”

 

“Don’t give the dog raw fish,” Yukari said. “You’ll make him sick.”

 

Koromaru whimpered and Kirika patted him on the head. “Don’t worry, boy, she’s just looking out for you.” She then glanced towards the front door. All night she had been trying not to think much about it, but… “I’m sorry, but it’s really bothering me that Aigis and Ikutsuki aren’t back yet,” she said to no one in particular. “Persephone doesn’t like it, either.”

 

“Yeah, I wonder what’s taking those two so long.” Junpei pulled out his phone to check the time. “It’s almost midnight…”

 

And at the stroke of midnight, everything stopped. The atmosphere shifted, and the two Kirijo Officials transmogrified into coffins.

 

Junpei’s eyes widened. “The hell?” Koromaru barked in response. “I thought we ended the Dark Hour. Senpai, what’s going on?”

 

Mitsuru shook her head. “I don’t know.”

 

“I knew it,” Kirika said. “I knew it had seemed too easy.”

 

“Apparently we were right to have our doubts,” Akihiko said.

 

“Yeah, something didn’t feel right.” Ken spoke up.

 

A bell then began to ring somewhere in the distance.

 

“No way…” Junpei said.

 

“Hey, do you hear that?” Yukari said, seeming puzzled. “It sounds like a bell, but where’s it coming from?”

 

Takeharu looked around. “Where’s Ikutsuki?” He paused. “Well? Why is he late? He’s got Aigis with him, doesn’t he?”

 

Mitsuru looked to the floor.

 

“Mitsuru…” Akihiko said.

 

“Everyone…prepare for battle,” she said. “We’re heading for Tartarus.”

 

Fuuka looked staggered. “Uhm…to do what?”

 

“I don’t know… But that’s where the sound is coming from. We have to find out what’s going on.”

 

Without another word, the group made their way for Tartarus. When they arrived, they found that Aigis and the Chairman were already present.

 

“Ikutsuki-san,” Akihiko said.

 

“Aigis?” Yukari said. “Why are you here?”

 

“She is merely here to fulfill her role,” the Chairman spoke up. “As a weapon.”

 

“Huh?”

 

“Ikutsuki-san, what’s this all about?” Junpei said.

 

“You said the Dark Hour and Tartarus would disappear if we defeated the twelve Shadows,” Akihiko went on. “That’s why we fought so hard. But now—”

 

“What is your intention?” Mitsuru paused, thinking. “It was all a lie, wasn’t it? You knew from the beginning that the Dark Hour wouldn’t disappear.”

 

The Chairman smirked. “Excellent deduction, Mitsuru. Unfortunately, your realisation has come too late.”

 

“No…” Yukari said.

 

“You tricked us,” Ken said.

 

“Everything is as I planned,” the Chairman went on. “It is not unexpected that the Dark Hour and Tartarus remain. In fact, I never intended for you to rid the world of them. Quite the opposite, actually.”

 

Fuuka’s eyes widened a bit. “What do you mean?”

 

“The twelve Shadows were parts of a whole. They were destined to be reunited. And that was accomplished in no small part, thanks to your efforts. Soon, Death, the Almighty, shall arise and bring forth the Fall.”

 

“Death?” Ken said.

 

“The Fall?” Kirika went on. _Just like his tarot reading_.

 

Akihiko was only growing angrier. “What are you talking about?”

 

“The end of all shall come and free this world from despair,” the Chairman said. “The death of everything… But also the beginning.”

 

“Wh-what is he saying?” Yukari said. “Is he out of his mind?”

 

“Ten years ago…I, too, was a scientist for the project we’ve spoken of. The experiment went awry, but that is not why the Dark Hour and Tartarus were born. They manifested as a result of harvesting the Shadows’ power—just as the experiment was designed to do. That is why your grandfather gathered so many Shadows… To bring about the Fall.”

 

Mitsuru shook her head. “That can’t be…”

 

“People have filled the world, yet turned it into a void. The only hope of salvation lies in ruin. According to the prophecy, the Fall will be orchestrated by ‘the Prince.’ And once the Prince has delivered us all, he shall rule the new world as King. The man who tried it ten years ago failed. But I will not; I shall succeed.”

 

“Man, he’s totally lost it,” Junpei said.

 

“Just stay close and stay behind me,” Kirika muttered to the others, her hand already on her Evoker, ready to counter.

 

“I apologise for deceiving you,” the Chairman continued, “but this was for your sake as well. If you follow me for just a little while longer, you, too, will find salvation.”

 

“You call that salvation?” Fuuka said.

 

Yukari paused. “I have a question for you.”

 

“Yes?” he said.

 

“In the video from my father, he said to defeat the Shadows… Was that a lie, too?”

 

“Ah… He did record that himself. Of course, I had to make some modifications.”

 

“You doctored it?” Mitsuru said.

 

“I corrected it. Your father was a superb scientist. He may not have known it, but I truly respected him. While others focused on the Shadows’ abilities, he explored much more important things. But unfortunately, he could not comprehend the magnificent potential of the Fall.”

 

“What?” Yukari said.

 

“He left that recording at the expense of his life,” Mitsuru said.

 

“It would seem so,” he said. “But it did prove rather useful, so I’m sure he’s happy.”

 

“So, you were behind it all?” Yukari said. “You used both me and my father.”

 

He looked almost…entertained. “ _Used_ is such an ugly word. It was for the sake of the world, so how could it be wrong?”

 

Kirika rolled her eyes. “Oh, what a load of bullshit.”

 

“Our role is to correct the mistakes of the past,” Mitsuru went on. “And we intend to do just that.”

 

At this, Yukari pulled out her Evoker. Kirika followed suit.

 

“Hey, w-wait…” Junpei said.

 

The Chairman sighed. “How disappointing… I had hoped you would see the light. But you are just children, after all. I suppose it can’t be helped. Aigis, the time has come for you to fulfill your role. Capture them, and prepare them to be sacrificed.” He pulled out a remote and pressed a button on it.

 

“Understood,” Aigis spoke up. She leaped out towards the group.

 

Kirika brought her Evoker to her head. “Persephone—”

 

Everything went black.

 

Kirika awoke with a groan. She blinked a couple times, focusing her eyes. Once she did, she noticed she was suspended in midair. She glanced around to find that she and the others were bound on crosses.

 

Persephone hadn’t been quick enough.

 

“What is going on here?” Takeharu spoke first.

 

“What the hell?” Junpei said.

 

“What is this?” Yukari went on.

 

Mitsuru’s eyes widened. “Father!”

 

Takeharu was standing before them, being held back by Aigis.

 

“Ikutsuki, what is the meaning of this?” he said.

 

“It is just as it appears,” the Chairman said. “They are to be sacrifices; harbingers of the Fall. The arrangements are complete. The prophecy shall be fulfilled.”

 

“What?” Akihiko said.

 

“You son of a bitch,” Junpei said. “I’m gonna rip your head off.”

 

“You can’t do this,” Kirika spoke up. Tch. Like saying that would change his deranged mind.

 

“Oh, I am so sorry you failed the group, Nishioka,” the Chairman said. He smirked. “It’s a shame, really. Especially since you could’ve warned them.”

 

She glared at him, clenching her jaw. “Go to hell.”

 

“Hmph.”

 

Just then, Aigis raised one of her arms, pointing it at Takeharu. She cocked the gun.

 

“You traitor,” Takeharu said. “Are you insane?”

 

“Of course not,” the Chairman said. “You know, your father was an unlucky man. Even you, his son, after all this time, do not understand his vision.”

 

“My father was wrong. Death as deliverance… That is not an ideology anyone should ever embrace.”

 

“Fool…you are but a nuisance now.” He paused. “Aigis.”

 

She cocked her gun again.

 

“Wait!” Mitsuru called out. “Please, Aigis, no!”

 

She paused, seemingly shaking.

 

“What are you doing, Aigis?” the Chairman said.

 

She dropped her arm. “I…am…”

 

He then pulled out a gun and pointed it at Takeharu. “Ten years… I’ve wasted ten long years. I’m not like your father; I won’t make any exceptions.”

 

He continued aiming his gun. Takeharu managed to free himself of Aigis’ grasp, and he pulled out his own gun. Quickly aiming, both of them fired. And after what felt like the longest couple of seconds, Takeharu slumped to the floor.

 

Mitsuru’s eyes widened. “Father… Father!”

 

Kirika struggled to free herself from her binds, but to no avail. _Damn it_ … Mitsuru’s cries echoed in her mind. _This can’t be happening_.

 

As for the Chairman, he was holding his side, having also been shot. “Aigis…we’ll end this. Execute the sacrifices. Now.”

 

Aigis turned and first pointed her arm at Minato.

 

“Aigis,” Fuuka spoke up.

 

“Damn it, snap out of it,” Junpei said.

 

“Finish them, Aigis,” the Chairman went on.

 

She started firing. Kirika squeezed her eyes shut, but she soon felt the floor beneath her. She reopened her eyes to see the others back on their feet, as well. It seemed that, rather than shooting at them, Aigis shot the binds holding them.

 

“What the…” Akihiko said.

 

Kirika let out a short breath of relief. “Oh, thank god.” She went to pull out her Evoker, but a hand stopped her. Akihiko. “What are you—?”

 

“Don’t encourage him,” he said, his voice low as he kept his gaze on the Chairman.

 

“Damn it, you—you defective machine,” the Chairman then said. He pulled the remote from before back out. “I’ll do it myself.”

 

Just then, Koromaru jumped out, knocking the remote out of his hand.

 

“What the—?”

 

“Koromaru,” Ken said.

 

The Chairman stumbled back, chuckling. “You don’t get it, do you? This useless, pathetic world will gradually fester over time. Only it’s destruction can bring about its salvation.” He pointed the gun at them, still chuckling. “And then, at long last, I will rule over the new world.” He dropped the gun by his side. “I was so close…” He took a few more steps back, and then tumbled off the edge of Tartarus.

 

Everyone was silent.

 

“How did it come to this?” Yukari spoke up.

 

Kirika stepped up to the edge of Tartarus where the Chairman had fallen to his death. She looked over the ledge… Hell, it was a long way to the bottom. She closed her eyes, taking a deep, shaky breath. _The Tower. Well, it seems its interpretation was for you personally rather than your disturbing goals_. She opened her eyes when she felt a hand on her shoulder. When she turned her head, she saw Akihiko. Of course. He didn’t speak, though, only gestured behind him with his head.

 

With that, they shifted their attention towards Mitsuru, who was on her knees beside her late father.

 

“One time, my father made a promise,” Mitsuru started. “He swore that he would atone for endangering our generation, even if it cost him his life. But I—I wanted him to live. I—I became a Persona-user to protect him…”

 

As she began sobbing, everyone remained utterly silent. They were all at a loss for words. Not that any could change the outcome. Soon enough, Akihiko helped her back to her feet, supporting her as they all made their way back to the dorm.

 

There was nothing that could be done.


	81. November 5th, 2009

Two and a half hours after the Dark Hour and Kirika still couldn’t sleep. She crept out of her room, heading down a single flight of stairs. She made her way down the short hall, stopping in front of Akihiko’s room. She softly knocked on the door before letting herself in. And before she even had to say anything, she heard him shift in his bed. So, she closed the door and crawled into the bed beside him.

 

“Two people now,” she spoke up.

 

“And you can’t blame yourself for either incident.”

 

“Yes, I can.”

 

He sighed. “Shinji didn’t want to be saved. As for Mitsuru’s father… You were still bound to the cross, so you didn’t even have the chance to try to heal him.”

 

“None of that should’ve happened in the first place. I should’ve been quick enough when Aigis first attacked us. I should’ve been able to stop her and protect everyone.”

 

“You need to stop being so hard on yourself.”

 

“Aki…” She sat up, defeated. “I just feel like I haven’t done my job as a Persona-user. As a defender.”

 

“C’mon, that’s not true,” he said, still lying down. “You’ve managed to protect all of us at one point or another. You saved me the first night we met. Plus, you protected Natsuki-chan when she was in that trance and went to Tartarus during the full moon. And you did protect Shinji one time, too.”

 

She swallowed hard. “I didn’t protect him when it mattered.”

 

Now he also sat up. “Every moment matters. I mean, if you hadn’t been there that night, then that could’ve ended up being the night he got killed. So yes, you did protect him when it mattered. Even if it didn’t seem like it at the time.”

 

“Tch.” She hugged her knees. “Kirijo is going to hate me.”

 

“No, she’s not. Trust me. One of the first things she’ll say to you once everything is settled is that she understands and that she isn’t holding anything against you.”

 

“How can you be so sure?”

 

“Because I’ve known Mitsuru for quite some time now and, believe me, she’s not one to hold grudges.”

 

“I think the circumstances might vary a little when they include her father’s death.”

 

“She’s not gonna blame you.” He lay back down. “C’mon, go to sleep.”

 

Kirika remained sitting up, her body beginning to shake. To go numb. She hugged her knees tighter, burying her face in them. Akihiko sat up again, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. She lifted her head a little.

 

“Do you think I’m like Strega?”

 

“Huh? Where is that coming from?”

 

“Jin mentioned the other night how they have to force their Personas out…”

 

“Kiri…” He shook his head. “They use Evokers and still have to force their Personas out. The only reason you ever had to force your Persona out was because you didn’t have an Evoker, so there was no other way. Now that you do have one, though, Persephone comes naturally to you.” He paused. “Doesn’t she?”

 

“Yes, but—”

 

“But nothing, then. That right there separates you from Strega. Plus, there’s the fact that you don’t agree with their views.”

 

“I guess…”

 

“Look at me.”

 

She lifted her head all the way to do as he said. Even through the darkness, she could still make out the look of genuine concern on his face. Hell, it still scared her to know just how much he cared for her. She then waited for him to gather his thoughts. Rather than saying anything else, though, he kissed her. And when he pulled away, she couldn’t hold back the smile. So, he smiled as well.

 

“You’re better than them,” he said.

 

“Thank you.”

 

“Of course.” He lay back down. “Now sleep.”

 

She lay with him, her back against his torso. He draped an arm over her waist and slid the other under her neck. Then he lightly kissed the nape of her neck, causing yet another spark. She closed her eyes, still smiling. No longer shaking.

 

When Akihiko woke up to get ready for school that morning, Kirika woke up with him. She was ready to force herself out of bed to go out for the day, but he told her to stay and take the day to rest. When she tried to argue, he wouldn’t allow it. Then she tried to tell him she should at least go back to her own room, to which he said there was no point. Plus, he made the argument that the others would also be awake by now, and it wasn’t worth the risk of getting caught. Having been defeated, she remained in his bed. Then again, she wasn’t really complaining.

 

“Do you need anything before I leave?” he checked.

 

“I hate being catered to, so no.”

 

He chuckled. “Then I’ll see you when I get back.” He kissed her forehead. “Try to take it easy today. You look completely worn.”

 

“Yeah, that would be Persephone reacting to last night’s events.”

 

“Well, tell her to chill out.”

 

She smiled sheepishly. “Go before you’re late.”

 

“Right.” Another kiss to the forehead. “I’ll see you later.”

 

“Bye, Aki…”

 

He left, and she curled back up in his bed. It was still warm.

 

Maybe she would sleep for a little while longer. It was early, after all. Or maybe she would try to figure out her next step. Originally, she was gonna take off again once this whole ordeal was done and over with. Only issue was that she had expected it to end the other night, which it obviously didn’t. Now there was no way of knowing how much longer it would last. But there was also the issue of her so-called change of heart; the fact that she had learned the wrongs in the life she had been leading. Better yet, there was the promise she made to Shinjiro… There was Akihiko.

 

Was he a good enough reason for her to stick around for once?

 

While all these thoughts were being mulled over in her exhausted head, her eyes drooped shut and she drifted back to sleep…

 

Next thing she knew, she was being gently shaken awake. Her eyes fluttered open to see Akihiko standing over her.

 

“C’mon, we’re meeting the others upstairs,” he said. She nodded, and he helped her out of the bed. “Did you really just sleep all day?”

 

She cleared her throat. “Guess so.”

 

There was that look of concern again. Damn it, he had to stop looking at her that. “You’re not getting sick, are you?”

 

“No, just…exhausted.”

 

With that, they reached the Command Room and sat down. Not long after, they were joined by Yukari, Fuuka, Minato, Junpei, and Ken.

 

“The Chairman’s room has been cleared out,” Fuuka spoke first.

 

“Well, that’s no surprise, considering what he did,” Akihiko said.

 

“Honestly, there was something I didn’t like about that man from the moment I met him,” Kirika said. “I didn’t think I really had the right to say anything, though.”

 

Yukari sighed. “I just can’t believe all this…”

 

“It’s in the papers, too,” Ken said. “ _Sudden Death of Kirijo Group’s CEO_. They blame it on illness, though.”

 

“Yeah…it’s never the truth,” Akihiko said.

 

“Mitsuru-senpai’s not here, huh?” Yukari said.

 

“She’s an only child, so there’s a lot of matters to be settled, including the funeral and the family business. I’m sure she’ll be busy for at least a week.”

 

“That sounds rough… I hope she’ll be okay.”

 

“So, what’re we supposed to do now?” Junpei prompted, sounding concerned. “What’ll happen to Chidori?”

 

“No word yet,” Akihiko said. “They’re probably too busy to be thinking about that. In fact, the entire Kirijo Group must be in a state of shock.”

 

“I hope Aigis is all right,” Fuuka said.

 

“What the hell?” Junpei went on. “Am I just supposed to wait for them to get their act together?”

 

“There’s nothing else you can do, Iori,” Kirika said.

 

“Mitsuru is meeting with the Board of Directors,” Akihiko went on. “That might explain the delay.”

 

“I see…” Yukari paused. “But still, what are we going to do? We have no idea how to get rid of the Dark Hour. We don’t even know what we’re fighting against.”

 

“What was that he said about ‘the Fall?’” Ken said. “What would’ve happened if we had been sacrificed?”

 

“There are so many unanswered questions,” Fuuka said.

 

“Yeah, but standing around here won’t solve anything, right?” Junpei said.

 

“True,” Akihiko said.

 

“Don’t be reckless,” Kirika said.

 

“No offence, Senpai, but you’re one to talk,” Junpei went on.

 

“Exactly. Okay. Take it from me.” She sighed. “Being reckless can sometimes set you even further behind than it can push you ahead.” Another pause. “I get that you’re angry and scared and hurt, but people do stupid things when under the influence of those emotions. I mean—ugh. Just…whatever happens next, we have to think rationally. We can’t act on clouded judgement. That won’t help anyone. Especially not ourselves. So, I don’t care if I sound like a hypocrite. Don’t be reckless.”

 

“She does have a point,” Ken spoke up.

 

Junpei didn’t seem satisfied with that response. “But—”

 

“No. Stop,” Kirika said. “We may not have all the answers, but maybe that’s what we can fight for next.”

 

Akihiko nodded. “Either way, there is one thing we know… Tartarus is still around, and there’s a bunch of Shadows inside. We should train so we’re ready for whatever it is we might have to face.”

 

With that, the group disbanded. Yukari and Fuuka fell behind in the Command Room, while Minato, Junpei, Ken, and Koromaru all headed down to the lounge. Kirika and Akihiko took seats around the table on the second floor. And for the rest of the night, they spoke softly with one another. For the rest of the night, they avoided the one topic they knew they would have to discuss sooner or later.

 

For now, it would be later.


	82. November 9th, 2009

Over the course of the next few days, Mitsuru was still gone, but Aigis had returned. She wouldn’t stop apologising, either, clearly guilt-ridden over her behaviour on that fateful night. Hmm.

 

That fateful night.

 

When it came to that topic, Kirika was trying her damnedest not to overthink every little detail like she almost always did. So that meant trying to go on with her standard routine. Her mind kept going back to the tarot reading, though. Hell, she was surprised no one had asked her yet what the Chairman had meant when he blatantly mentioned that she could’ve warned them. But that still didn’t mean she wasn’t waiting for it to come up at some point.

 

Then one late afternoon when she was leaving the mall, she ran into Junpei.

 

“Oh, hey, Iori,” she greeted him. “Heading home from the hospital?”

 

“Nah, I was at the arcade,” he said, sounding gloomy about that answer. “If I had known you were there, too, I would’ve waited and asked if you wanted to walk back to the dorm together.”

 

“Don’t worry about it.” She paused, not wanting the silence to grow stiff. “So, uh, have you gone to the hospital at all lately?”

 

“Well, there’s been so much going on, I haven’t really gotten the chance.”

 

“True.”

 

“I did go the other day, though, and—” He sighed. “Forget about it.”

 

“C’mon, don’t do that. Just tell me. And don’t beat around the bush, either, because that pisses me off.”

 

“Right. Uh…” He came to a stop. “Well, Chidori told me that she doesn’t want me visiting her anymore.”

 

“Shit. Why?”

 

“Apparently it used to be fun when I would visit, but now it just hurts her too much.” He shook his head. “I don’t even get what she means by that.”

 

“That is a bit odd…”

 

“Right?” He sighed again. “I don’t know what to do. I mean, I wanna see her, but I don’t want her to get mad at me for going against her wishes.”

 

“Give her some time. Maybe she’ll change her mind.”

 

“And if she doesn’t?”

 

“That’ll depend on you.”

 

He considered this, then nodded. “Thanks, Nishioka-san.”

 

“No problem.”

 

“Y’know, you’ve changed a lot in the few months you’ve been living at the dorm.”

 

She pursed her lips, much more intrigued by his comment than she wanted to admit. “Is that so?”

 

“Definitely. I mean, you used to be so distant and wouldn’t really give any of us the time of day. Now you’re more open and seem to genuinely give a shit about all of us and our well-being.”

 

She couldn’t help but laugh at this. “Was I really that bad in the beginning?”

 

He shrugged his shoulders. “It was just hard to read you. Don’t get me wrong, it’s still pretty hard, but it’s almost like you’re more willing to help us out now. You don’t just leave us guessing anymore.”

 

“Hmm…”

 

“What?”

 

“Nothing. Guess I sorta knew I was changing, but never realised how noticeable those changes would be to others.”

 

“That good or bad?”

 

“Haven’t decided yet.”

 

“Well, either way,” he smiled, nudging her arm with his elbow, “I think Sanada-san may have something to do with it.”

 

“Perhaps.”

 

Now his eyes widened a bit. “Whoa, you—you didn’t deny it.”

 

“What is there to deny?”

 

“So, you admit that you two have a thing going on?”

 

“Tch. No.”

 

“But you just said—”

 

“I know what I said; you don’t have to remind me.”

 

His furrowed his brow in confusion. “Can’t say I’m following, Senpai.”

 

“Don’t worry about following, Iori. Just worry about making your own path.”

 

“A-are we still talking about the same thing?”

 

She laughed as she started walking again. “C’mon, we still got a ways to go.”

 

“Hold on—” He paused to catch up with her. “You’re confusing me on purpose, aren’t you?”

 

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

 

“Shinjiro-san was right. You are a pain in the ass.”

 

Rather than feeling offended, she laughed even more. “Shut up and let’s go. I don’t know about you, but I’m freezing.”

 

So, they continued back to the dorm without any other sort of distractions, talking about random things the rest of the way. Kirika was actually thankful for it, too, because it kept her mind occupied.

 

“Welcome back,” Aigis greeted them as they walked through the door. “Mitsuru-san will be back tomorrow.”

 

“Just in time to meet the new kid,” Yukari said as she rolled her eyes.

 

“New kid?” Kirika said.

 

“The school received another transfer student today,” Fuuka said.

 

Junpei smiled. “His name is Ryoji Mochizuki and he’s awesome. Here for only a day and he’s already asked out most of the girls in the junior class. Guy’s got guts.”

 

“Guy sounds like a prick,” Kirika said.

 

“He is dangerous,” Aigis said.

 

“Yeah, and Aigis keeps saying that about him,” Yukari said. “It’s kinda weird.”

 

Kirika considered this for a moment. “Why do you think he’s dangerous, Aigis?”

 

“There is just something about him I do not like.”

 

“Hmm. Now I kinda do wanna meet this guy.”

 

Junpei groaned. “C’mon, you girls are gonna ruin everything.”

 

“What are you talking about?” Akihiko spoke up.

 

“A potential good-looking-guy duo.”

 

Kirika rolled her eyes, pushing Junpei away from her. “Get over yourself, Iori.”

 

“C’mon, Senpai, one minute you’re nice and the next minute you’re a total—” Junpei’s eyes widened as he stopped himself.

 

She folded her arms across her chest. “A total…what?”

 

“N-nothing.” He shook his head keenly, practically throwing his hands up in surrender. “I wasn’t gonna say anything.”

 

“Yeah, that’s what I thought.”

 

Akihiko laughed. “Nice save.”

 

“Seriously, way to go, Stupei,” Yukari said.

 

Junpei muttered to himself as he moved to sit down at the table. Kirika laughed before going over to the couch. She picked up the book she had recently started and sat down beside Akihiko, maybe a little closer to him than she really had to be. He shot her a small smile and she blushed softly. No one said anything; they were all far too busy minding their own business. And Kirika was too busy minding the boy next to her. The stranger turned—

 

Shit. She really had grown that attached.


	83. November 10th, 2009

The following day, Kirika decided to stay at the dorm with Koromaru. So, she said her goodbyes to everyone in the lounge as they left for school. Then she curled up in one of the armchairs with a book and the Shiba Inu at her feet. He seemed more than content to have the company.

 

A little after ten o’clock, the dorm’s front door opened, and in walked a completely worn-looking Mitsuru. Koromaru perked up a bit as Kirika put her book down and got to her feet.

 

“Oh, I wasn’t expecting anyone to be here,” Mitsuru said.

 

“Well…I can pretend I never saw you,” Kirika said.

 

“That won’t be necessary. Although, it has been a long week. So, I will be going up to my room where—”

 

“You do not want to be disturbed.” She nodded her head once. “Got it.”

 

“Thank you.”

 

Mitsuru made her way upstairs, and Kirika sat back down once she disappeared at the top. Koromaru whined, so she petted his head.

 

“I know, boy. It’s tough seeing someone who’s usually so strong get broken like that. We just gotta give her some time, though. She’ll come around soon enough.” She paused, looking back towards the stairs. “I hope.”

 

After that brief encounter, she decided to take Koromaru out for a walk. So, they made their way to the Shrine. And once they spent a good amount of time there, they took the long way back to the dorm. By the time they returned, it was almost one o’clock. There were still a few hours left before anyone else would be home. So, she made some tea, sat back down in the armchair, and continued reading.

 

Less than an hour later, the front door opened again. This time, it was Akihiko who was walking in.

 

“Is Mitsuru home?” he said.

 

Kirika put the book down again. “Yeah, she’s in her room. She’s really not up for seeing anyone, though.”

 

“Hmm. I’m gonna go check on her anyway. See if she needs anything.”

 

“I don’t think that would be a good idea, Aki. She looked exhausted.”

 

“I can’t just sit around and do nothing.” With that, he headed upstairs.

 

She shook her head, falling back into the chair. Then she just waited for him to return to the lounge. And when he did, he looked defeated. He slumped onto the couch.

 

“I told you it was a bad idea,” she spoke up.

 

He let out a heavy sigh. “Mitsuru is such a strong person inside, but now it’s as if she just got her insides ripped out… I just want her to be all right.” He paused. “Hell, I wish there was something more I could do. I mean…have you ever felt so useless?”

 

“As a matter of fact…” Her gaze fell to the floor.

 

“Damn it, Kiri, I—I’m sorry. I didn’t—I didn’t mean—”

 

“No, it’s fine. Really.” She paused. “So, I think it’s safe to assume Mitsuru won’t be joining us during any trips to Tartarus for a while.”

 

Another sigh. “No, probably not. We can’t let that stop us from going, though. So, unless I can’t be there, we’ll still be able to make trips.”

 

“Sounds goods.”

 

They fell silent. Kirika petted Koromaru on the head as he began to fall asleep. Akihiko, on the other hand, was looking around and fidgeting a bit too much.

 

“Something on your mind?” she broke the silence.

 

“Well…yeah,” he said. “I’ve been trying to avoid this conversation, but I don’t think I can wait any longer.” He took a deep breath. “What exactly are you plans now? Will you be sticking around or—?”

 

“I said I would stay until it was all over and done with.”

 

“I know, but—”

 

“So long as the Dark Hour and Tartarus still exist, I ain’t going anywhere.” She smiled, shrugging her shoulders. “Sorry, but you’re stuck with me for a little while longer.”

 

He smiled back. “Y-yeah, that’s what I was afraid of.”

 

Now she laughed. “Oh, thanks.”

 

“Hey, what if we never find a way to eliminate the Dark Hour and Tartarus?”

 

She stood up before leaning over him on the couch, causing him to have to sit back all the way. They were barely a breath apart. “Don’t push your luck, Sanada.” His cheeks were flushed almost as red as his sweater vest. He began spewing stuttered syllables. She then chuckled, moving to sit back down. “You’re pretty cute when you’re flustered.”

 

“Shut up,” he finally managed to say, still blushing. “Getting back to the point, are you staying or not?”

 

“For now, yes.”

 

“For now?”

 

“Don’t overthink it, Aki.”

 

“Yeah, I guess…”

 

“Keep your mind on the fight. That’s what you always used to do.”

 

“That was before you showed up.”

 

“Well, you can’t let me be a distraction. You should know that.”

 

He paused. “You’re doing it again.”

 

“Doing what?”

 

“Pulling yourself away. Trying to not make yourself a priority.”

 

“Hmm.” She swallowed hard. “I hope you’ve come to realise that I don’t do it on purpose. It almost just…happens naturally.”

 

He reached over to take her hand in his. “You’re ridiculous.”

 

She laughed. “I’m sorry.”

 

“No, you don’t need to apologise.”

 

She then shook her head at him. “I also hope you realise how insane you are.”

 

He tilted his head curiously. “Oh yeah? And what makes you say that?”

 

“The fact that you’re even bothering with someone like me.”

 

“Someone like you. Hmm. You mean a flight risk?”

 

“Oh, good, you remember.”

 

“Well, here’s a little secret,” he leaned in a little closer to her, “I believe you’re worth the risk.”

 

Now she was the one blushing. “Pretty sure that makes you even crazier.”

 

He chuckled, sitting back. “So be it.”

 

“Y’know, you’re making this a lot harder for me.”

 

“Good.”

 

She continued shaking her head at him. “Tch. Idiot.”

 

He laughed even more, and it was the sweetest sound. “Moron.”

 

That was the end of the conversation; Kirika and Akihiko then sat in comfortable silence. Until, that is, everyone else started to return to the dorm, filling the lounge with animated conversation. It was a nice change of atmosphere, though.

 

She was growing more prone to a life with relationships. And while that still did terrify her, she no longer felt the need to run.


	84. November 13th, 2009

Kirika finished her plans for the day around three o’clock that afternoon so she could catch Akihiko just as he was on his way out of school. They met at the front gates and continued their way to the dorm.

 

“Hey, do you have anyone else that you hang out with around the city?” he asked once they were on the tram.

 

“Tch.” She almost wanted to laugh. “You do know who you’re asking, right?”

 

“Oh, c’mon. There has to be someone.”

 

“Uhm, not really. Only person I hung out with around the city was Shinji, but he’s not around anymore…” She paused. “Huh. For whatever reason, that sounded a lot less depressing in my head.”

 

He couldn’t help but chuckle. “The only reason I ask is because we’re all gonna be going on the school trip soon. And juniors and seniors are going together this year, so—”

 

“Wait, where are you guys going and how long will you be gone?”

 

“We’re going to Kyoto, and the trip lasts for three days.”

 

“So, I’m gonna be alone at the dorm for three days with—”

 

“Amada.”

 

“Oh. Great.”

 

“A-and Koro-chan.”

 

She shook her head. “Whatever, I’ll just be sure to keep myself extra occupied for those three days.”

 

“Actually, I would really appreciate it if you would at least try to keep Amada company while we’re gone. I mean, he is just a kid.”

 

Now she sighed. “I really don’t want to.”

 

“C’mon, you can’t resent him that much.”

 

“How can you _not_ resent him? Shinji was your best friend, after all.”

 

“Yeah, I’m aware of that. But we talked about this already. I mean, Shinji literally took a bullet for the kid. Plus, he asked me to look after him.” He paused. “Shinji didn’t blame Ken for how he felt. He believed he was completely in the right; that he had every reason to feel the way he did. And Ken is trying to make up for it now.”

 

Another sigh. “I know how to be civil with the kid. Okay? Isn’t that what matters?”

 

“Sure, but Shinji wouldn’t want you feeling this way.”

 

“Don’t try to guilt me into spending time with the kid.”

 

“Kiri, please, don’t you believe in second chances?”

 

“Depends on the person and how they screwed up the first time around.”

 

“That’s not how second chances work.”

 

“Uh, yeah, it kinda is. I mean, you don’t just give out second chances to every person who makes a mistake. Hell, if that were the case we’d be giving Strega a second chance.”

 

“Well, technically we have given Chidori a second chance.”

 

“Tch. So, would you also give Takaya a second chance?”

 

He paused. “Okay, I guess you’ve made your point.”

 

“That’s what I thought.”

 

They then fell silent. And they remained silent until they passed through the Iwatodai Strip Mall. That was where they ran into a couple of familiar girls…

 

“Akihiko-senpai,” one of the girls practically squealed. “Oh, it’s so nice running into you here.”

 

“Are you totally excited for the school trip?” the second girl said.

 

Akihiko chuckled uneasily. “Yeah, I guess I’m looking forward to it.”

 

The second girl giggled. “We are, too.”

 

“Hey, Senpai,” the first girl started, a blush creeping over her cheeks, “maybe while we’re there we could sneak into the hot springs together.”

 

At this, Kirika pursed her lips and hooked her arm around Akihiko’s. “Y’know, _Aki_ , we should really get going now.”

 

“Oh. Y-yeah, right. We should go.” He looked back at the two girls. “And sorry, but I’m gonna have to turn that offer down.”

 

With that, they continued on their way. And with every step they took, Kirika could feel the daggers from those girls’ glare.

 

“Oh, my fu—Who the hell do they think they are—?” she started going off once they were out of sight.

 

“Kirika.”

 

“—I can’t believe they spoke to you like that—”

 

“Kiri.”

 

“—I mean, that was just rude and disrespectful and—”

 

Before she could get another word out, Akihiko kissed her to shut her up. She was taken aback by this sudden action.

 

“—to-totally uncalled for,” she finished saying once he pulled away. She swallowed hard. “W-what was that for?”

 

He smiled, shrugging. “Nothing…except you’re pretty cute when you’re jealous.”

 

She pursed her lips again. “I was not jealous.” He raised an eyebrow at her, causing her cheeks to flush red. “Shut up.”

 

Now he laughed. “Hey, don’t get me wrong, it was—It felt—Hmm…”

 

“I hope you know I hate you.”

 

He was still smiling. “Fine. Keep telling yourself that.”

 

She returned a sheepish smile. “Yeah, I just might have to.”


	85. November 17th, 2009

One o’clock in the morning. In just a few hours, the others would be getting up and ready for their school trip. As for Kirika, she was already up and unable to keep her mind at bay. They had gone to Tartarus during the Dark Hour since they wouldn’t be able to go for the next few days, and since Mitsuru was finally up for the explorations again. Since then, though, Kirika’s mind had been pounding just as hard as her heart.

 

It was a little after 1:30 when she finally decided to sneak down to Akihiko’s room. She was just about to knock on the door when it opened, revealing him standing on the other side.

 

He smiled sleepily. “Yo. Make yourself comfortable and I’ll be right back.”

 

She nodded. “Okay.”

 

He kissed her forehead and quietly took off down the hallway. She entered the room and closed the door behind her, but didn’t latch it. She then crawled under the covers of the warm, empty bed and waited. A couple minutes later, she felt Akihiko climbing into the bed and lying beside her.

 

“Are you ready for your trip?” she said.

 

“Yes and no. There’s just been so much going on lately… I’m concerned about Mitsuru, too.”

 

“I thought she was all good now.”

 

“There’s still something off about her. I mean, she’s just not herself. And I don’t know what to do, or how much longer it’s gonna last.”

 

“Well, you can’t speed up a person’s grieving process. Just because you got over Shinji within a day or two doesn’t mean—”

 

“Hey, that’s not fair.”

 

“I’m sorry. I-I didn’t mean it like that.”

 

He sighed. “I just don’t want her to be so bummed out… She almost chose to not go on the trip.”

 

“Well, I don’t think she realises how lucky she is.”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“To have a friend like you. A friend who cares so much.”

 

He smiled at her through the darkness. “Well, of course I care. Mitsuru and I have been through a lot together now.”

 

“Yeah…”

 

“Kiri?” he spoke up after a few moments of silence.

 

“Hmm?”

 

“Are you gonna be okay while we’re gone?”

 

“Uhm, do you know who you’re talking to? I’m more than used to being alone, so I’ll be more than okay.”

 

“That’s not exactly what I meant.”

 

She paused to sit up. “Then what exactly did you mean?”

 

“It’s not that I don’t trust you, but…” He swallowed hard before also sitting up. “You’re still gonna be here when we get back, right?”

 

“E-excuse me?”

 

“I’m sorry, I just—I don’t know…”

 

“Aki, I already told you—”

 

“No, yeah, I know.” He nodded. “Guess I still just get scared sometimes.”

 

She thought for a moment. Then she moved to take her necklace off. “Here.” She handed it to him.

 

“Is this supposed to make me feel better?”

 

“It should.”

 

“Oh yeah? So, why are you giving it back?”

 

“I’m not giving it back. Not permanently, at least.” She took a deep breath. “Bring it with you on the trip. I mean, you and I both sure as hell know I wouldn’t go anywhere without that necklace. So, if you bring it with you, it’ll reassure you that I’ll be right here waiting for you to return so I can get it back.” She paused. “Well, maybe not right here in this exact spot. But, y’know, here in the dorm.”

 

He chuckled. “All right. Sounds like a plan.”

 

“Good. Let’s get to sleep now before I keep you up any longer and make you exhausted for the trip.”

 

So, they both lay back down, Kirika’s back to Akihiko’s torso. His arms were wound around her, and he was still holding onto the necklace. She closed her eyes and smiled as she drifted off…

 

When she woke up that morning, he was already long gone. She lifted her head only slightly to find her necklace and a note in the empty spot beside her. She picked the small piece of paper up so she could read it:

 

 _I trust you_.

 

She smiled, putting the note down to now pick the necklace up. She clasped it around her neck, her fingers tracing over the key pendant. She looked at the note again.

 

“See you in a few days, stranger.”


	86. November 20th, 2009

While everyone was away, Kirika did her best to do as Akihiko had requested and keep Ken company. So, whenever he went to take Koromaru for a walk, she would join him. Then she also made sure he ate—even though she didn’t—and she brought him back a coffee the couple of times she stopped by the mall. It was completely civil, and he was completely appreciative.

 

“Hey. So, uhm, thank you for hanging around these last few days,” he said to her the day the others were meant to return. “It means a lot to me.”

 

She kept her focus on the stupid tabloid she was skimming. “Don’t worry about it, kid.” She flipped the page.

 

“Either way, I hope you like sweets.” He handed her a bag. “I stopped by the sweets shop and picked some out for you as a thank you for this week.”

 

That was when she paused and looked up. “Oh.” She took the bag from him. “You really didn’t have to do this.”

 

“I wanted to. Plus, I know you’re still pretty mad at me about the whole situation with Shinjiro-senpai, and I wanted to apologise for that at the same time.”

 

Now she smiled, ruffling his hair. “Maybe you’re not such a bad kid, after all.”

 

His cheeks turned a little pink. “Th-thanks.”

 

“And you shouldn’t have to apologise for Shinji. I haven’t been acting as…maturely over the situation as I should’ve been.”

 

“You don’t have to explain yourself to me, Senpai.”

 

“Just know that I understand. I didn’t want to believe I did, but I do.”

 

He nodded. “Mind if I watch some TV?”

 

“Go for it,” she said, grateful for the change of subject.

 

So, he turned the TV on. And, of course, the very first words to come out of it were—

 

 _Apathy Syndrome_.

 

“Ugh. Is that the only thing the news reports on anymore?” she said. “That’s all this dumb magazine is about, too.”

 

“Well, it is the only big thing happening around the city, at the moment.”

 

“All the better reason to not talk about it. The more they talk about it, the more people are gonna freak out about it.”

 

“The Lost are everywhere, so people are gonna talk about it regardless. Also, you can’t really blame people for being frightened. I mean, there’s no way of knowing who will be next.”

 

“People aren’t scared for their friends and family, though; they’re scared for themselves. Trust me, I’ve done enough traveling to learn how selfish people truly are.”

 

“You’re not selfish.”

 

“That would literally go against my Persona.”

 

He shrugged his shoulders. “Still… Oh, and Sanada-san isn’t selfish, either.” He paused. “Neither was Shinjiro-senpai, for that matter.”

 

“What about you? Do you think you’re selfish?”

 

“Honestly, I’m not sure. I just know I don’t want to be.”

 

She smiled. “Good answer, kiddo.”

 

Just then, Koromaru barked.

 

“Hmm. This would be the moment when Aigis would tell us that he’s saying he’s not selfish either.”

 

Ken laughed. “You’re probably right about that.”

 

The rest of the afternoon passed by relatively quickly. By 6:30, the front door opened and the others all returned.

 

“Hello,” Ken greeted them. “Wow, that was fast. How was Kyoto?”

 

“Awe, man, I’m so tired,” Junpei said. “But it was a lot of fun. I brought you back some ‘souvenir stories,’ so I’ll tell you them later.”

 

“Oh, okay. I can’t wait to hear them.”

 

“Did you bring me back anything, Iori?” Kirika spoke up.

 

“Uh, no. I didn’t wanna cross any lines…” He chuckled unsurely. “Anyway, we can’t go to Tartarus tonight; we’re all too tired. Let’s go tomorrow night. Even though we don’t have anything to fight for anymore…”

 

“Did you two enjoy your time together?” Fuuka said.

 

Ken smiled. “I think so.”

 

Kirika chuckled a bit. “We did. Amada even got some candy for me from the sweets shop as a thank you.”

 

Junpei grinned. “Uh-oh, looks like you got some competition, Sanada-san.”

 

Akihiko shook his head. “Shut up.”

 

Mitsuru then approached Kirika. “Nishioka, I would like to speak with you privately, for a moment. If you don’t mind.”

 

“Not at all.”

 

The two of them headed up to the third floor and sat down.

 

“What’s on your mind?” Kirika said.

 

“I just wanted to let you know, I don’t blame you for my father’s death. I understand you were just as tied up as the rest of us and unable to aid him.” She paused. “Although, I must admit I did feel quite indignant towards you at first after the fact. I guess I had been under the impression that you would’ve rushed to his side as soon as we were broken free of our bindings, but I understand that would’ve been a risk. After all, the Chairman was still armed and he could’ve shot at you for trying to save my father. Plus, Akihiko did let me know that you had fully intended on making a move, but he told you not to encourage Ikutsuki. So, I’m glad at least two of you were still thinking rationally in that moment.” She took a deep breath. “Anyhow, I don’t blame you and I am holding nothing against you. And you truly have been an incredible help to us. I’m very pleased Akihiko asked you to join, and I’m happy you were able to convince me to let you join.”

 

She took a moment to let those words sink in. “You have no idea how much I appreciate that.”

 

“You’re welcome.” She paused again. “And while we’re talking about Akihiko, there is actually something I would like to say.”

 

Now she wanted to shrink into herself. “What would that be?”

 

She paused, considering how to word her next phrase. “Well, I don’t mean to embarrass you, but I do hope you realise the dorm rules still apply to you despite the fact that you don’t attend our school.”

 

She swallowed hard. “R-right. Of course.”

 

“Okay.”

 

“Hmm.” She thought for a moment. “By the way, when you guys first walked in, there seemed to be this strange…tension between everyone.”

 

“Oh. Yes. There was an _incident_.”

 

“An incident?”

 

“The boys were punished on the last night of the trip.”

 

Her eyes widened a bit, but she was smiling wide. “What the hell did they do?”

 

“We girls went into the hot springs to wind down and relax only to find that the boys had…overstayed their welcome.”

 

Now she gasped before she started laughing. “Hold on, they were actually hiding in the hot springs?”

 

Mitsuru seemed just as amused to retell the tale. “Yes. Takeba and Yamagishi discovered them, and I was sure to give them a thorough execution. I’m most certain they’ve learned their lesson.”

 

“Oh, I am so sorry I missed that.”

 

She smiled in return. “Let’s go rejoin the others downstairs.”

 

She continued laughing, staying in place. “Sorry, just…give me a moment.”

 

“What do you find so amusing?”

 

“I’m not sure why, but I’m just imagining…if Shinji had been there.”

 

At this, Mitsuru also laughed. “I’m not entirely sure that’s something I want to image. At the same time, though, I almost wish he had been there.”

 

Kirika finally started to calm down. “Yeah…yeah, I know what you mean.”

 

The two of them then headed back downstairs. Mitsuru took a seat on one of the couches, while Kirika sat down at the table with Akihiko.

 

“Have a good time on the trip?” she said.

 

“Sure. It was okay,” he said.

 

“Yeah? That’s good.” She paused, unable to hold back the grin growing across her lips. “Did you enjoy the hot springs?”

 

Now his eyes widened. “N-no, that—I-it didn’t happen like that.” He stopped Minato as he walked by. “Tell her it didn’t happen like that.”

 

Minato paused. “It didn’t happen like that.” He then continued on his way.

 

Akihiko sighed apprehensively. “Here’s the thing. You see, the principal offenders were Junpei and Ryoji. I was forced to commit the crime, against my will. I was a victim, too. I mean, I didn’t know what was going on, and I wanted to get out of there because I didn’t want to see anything.” He shook his head. “C’mon, you gotta believe me. I—” He then stopped when he realised her grin had transformed into that of a smirk. He let out another sigh, defeated. “Go ahead…”

 

She leaned in a little closer to him. “You’re cute when you’re flustered.”

 

His cheeks flushed. “Please don’t mention this ever again.”

 

She shrugged her shoulders. “Seems like a simple enough request.”

 

“Thank you.” He paused. “And thank you for being here. For staying here.”

 

“Where else would I go?”

 

“I don’t know. Anywhere?”

 

“A few months ago…yeah, I would’ve been anywhere at this point.”

 

“But now?”

 

“Now…” She smiled. “Now I’m not sure if there’s anywhere else I want to be.”

 

He smiled back. And there was a look of relief in that smile. “I’m glad.”

 

She pursed her lips, blushing and glancing downward. “Shut up.” He then leaned in even closer to her, but she swiftly backed away. “Aki, the hell do you think you’re doing?” she said, lowering her voice.

 

“I haven’t seen you.”

 

“Everyone is literally right there.”

 

“I don’t—” He shook his head. “I don’t care.”

 

He placed a hand on the nape of her neck to pull her closer, and he kissed her. After a short moment, she smiled into the kiss.

 

“I hate you,” she said once they broke apart.

 

He smiled back again. “So you’ve said.”

 

“Way to go, Senpai,” Junpei then called out with childish excitement.

 

She rolled her eyes. “Tch. Shut up, Iori.” She then pursed her lips. “I somehow already forgot…everyone is literally right there.”

 

That being said, they backed away from each other.

 

Fuuka smiled. “You two are so cute.”

 

“Let them keep their relationship private,” Mitsuru spoke up, her eyes remaining on the pages of her book.

 

Yukari giggled. “C’mon, it’s not like we hadn’t already pieced it together ourselves.”

 

“That still does not make it any of our business,” Aigis said.

 

Kirika got to her feet. “On that note, this is where I take my leave. So, I will be up in my room if any of you would like to embarrass me there.” She made her way upstairs.

 

Akihiko followed her without saying a word until they stopped in front of her door. “I’m sorry, I guess I really shouldn’t have—”

 

“Hey, it would’ve come out into the open eventually, right? And like Yukari said, I don’t think we did that great of a job at keeping it oblivious.”

 

“Yeah, maybe not, but I’m still sorry.” He paused. “Anyway, I think I’m gonna head to bed, too. It’s been a long couple of days.”

 

“Okay. Goodnight.”

 

He took her hand and squeezed it. “Goodnight.” And he walked away.

 

She entered her room and leaned against the door with a sigh and a smile. Finally, things were turning around for the better. Hmm. Finally…


	87. November 22nd, 2009

Kirika spent the day out and about, trying to keep her mind clear of any thoughts of the Dark Hour or Tartarus or Shadows. She spent the day at the mall. She got a couple cups of coffee, browsed the record shop, played some games at the arcade. Then she stopped by the pharmacy before making her way back to Port Island Station. Rather than waiting on the tram, though, she decided to sit in on the day’s movie marathon. The genre was action, so she figured she’d finally be intrigued by the films.

 

By the time the marathon ended, the sun had long since set. The crisp November air was settling in. She took a deep breath and it burned her lungs. It was a satisfying sensation. She then took a seat on a bench to wait for the tram. She pulled out a cigarette and lit it. The warmth she received from it was false, but it was still better than nothing. She wasn’t seated for very long, though, before she felt the overwhelming sense of being watched. She ignored it and checked her wristwatch for the umpteenth time. 11:42. Shit. She was really cutting it close.

 

And there was that feeling again. She looked around the station. The only other people present were the Lost. She discarded her cigarette, wrapping her arms around herself at the sudden chill that had swept through her. Then her eyes landed on the entrance to the back alley.

 

“I really shouldn’t,” she mumbled under her breath.

 

Before she could talk herself out of it, her feet were already leading her in that dreaded direction. And when she entered the alley, she found it to be completely empty. Hell, that was even stranger. Something was seriously wrong.

 

“Hello, Kirika,” a female voice said out of nowhere.

 

She jumped and turned in the direction of the voice. “Chidori? The hell? When were you released from the hospital?”

 

There was a blank look on her face. “I wasn’t.”

 

Her brow furrowed, mystified. Before Kirika could say anything else, though, she was gagged and blindfolded, and her hands were tied behind her back. _Stay alert, Persephone_. She wouldn’t allow herself to black out now. She couldn’t.

 

As she was led down the blind pathway, she could only imagine what was going to be happening next. Of course the people aiding Chidori had to be Takaya and Jin. Of course they weren’t actually dead. But what were their exact plans? Either this was a trap for the group, or Strega was prepared to off her for good. She couldn’t decide which scenario sounded worse.

 

Finally, she was no longer moving. Her hands were unbound, and she was ungagged. Then as soon as the blindfold was removed, she was pushed forward. She caught herself, landing at the base of a stairwell to nowhere.

 

Tartarus.

 

“You really shouldn’t stay out so late,” Takaya spoke from behind.

 

Kirika swiftly jumped to her feet and turned to face him. She reached down to her side, but—

 

“Looking for this?” Jin said, holding up her Evoker.

 

“Memento vivere,” Takaya read aloud, as if he was lost deep in thought. “Remember to live. How…” he smirked, “endearing.”

 

She glared at them. “Where’s Chidori?”

 

“Oh, she’s outside, summoning your little friends.”

 

“So…what? Am I bait? A hostage?”

 

Jin scoffed. “Please, you’re not worth that much.”

 

“Then what the hell do you want with me?”

 

“It’s not a matter of wanting something from you,” Takaya said. “It’s more what we don’t want.” He held out his hand and Jin gave him the revolver. “And we don’t want you to interfere.”

 

She let out a shaky breath. “Fine. But if you’re gonna kill anyone else, then let it be me. Finish me off. Finish the job. After all, that is what you said you were gonna do when you first discovered I had survived. So, go ahead.” She swallowed hard, gesturing her head towards the gun in the shirtless young man’s hand. “Kill me.”

 

Takaya stepped up to her. He touched the revolver to the scar on her abdomen and dug the head into it. She collapsed to her knees out of pain. Past and present.

 

Jin then walked over to them, tossing her Evoker down by her side. “Memento vivere. Tch. What a joke.”

 

With that, Takaya used the revolver to whip Kirika over the side of her head. Somehow, she managed to keep her balance, pressing her palm to her temple in a vain attempt to numb the pain. She looked at her hand to find blood dripping between her fingers. _C’mon, don’t black out. Please don’t black out_. She fell forward, catching herself with her hands. She fumbled with the floor as she tried to track down her Evoker, Persephone in a frenzied panic.

 

The room began to spin, and everything was becoming blurred. She blinked her eyes a few times, trying to regain focus, but to no avail. All she could make out were the outlines of two bodies growing smaller and smaller as they disappeared into the distance.

 

The room then fell on its side, and everything went black…


	88. November [Unknown], 2009

Kirika squeezed her eyes shut, groaning out of pain. The side of her head was pounding, and her body was shaking all over. Somehow, though, she felt numb at the same time. Paralysed. She wanted to move, but she was almost afraid to.

 

 _Dead. I’m dead. This—this is what death feels like. This is what the afterlife feels like_. She released another groan at the slightest shift of her body. _Ugh. On the other hand, maybe not. Death is probably less painful_.

 

Slowly, she managed to push herself up into a sitting position, resting her weight between her knees and toes. Her hands rested on her thighs and she hung her head, trying to stop the dizziness. Once it did stop—or at least slowed down—she lifted her head and forced her eyes open. She looked around as they adjusted themselves.

 

 _Tartarus. I’m still in Tartarus… What the hell time is it_? She looked at her wristwatch only to find it didn’t seem to work properly inside the tower. She let out a heavy sigh. _Ugh. Perfect_. She lowered her arm and glanced beside herself to find her Evoker. She picked it up. _Thanks for the help, Persephone_. She returned it to its holster and her head dropped into her hands. _This is gonna be fun to explain to the others_.

 

She pushed herself up to a standing position but had done so a little to swiftly. Dizziness took over again, the area spinning onto its side. She put her arms out a bit to help keep and steady her balance. After taking a few deep breaths, the spinning came to a standstill. She then started towards the entrance to Tartarus only to find that it was gone.

 

The door was gone.

 

 _The Dark Hour’s over. The Dark Hour is over…and I’m still inside the Tower_. She stumbled back a bit, dazed. _Shit. No wonder I feel so frigging exhausted_. She fell back to the ground. _What the hell am I supposed to do now_? She sighed out of exasperation. _Oh, who am I kidding? There’s nothing else for me to do except wait_.

 

And that’s exactly what she did do. She crawled back to the base of the stairs, and she sat and waited. And she would wait for an undisclosed amount of time. For as long as she would need to. She waited for the next Dark Hour to begin so she could get the hell out of Tartarus. So, she could get back to the dorm.

 

Ugh. The dorm.

 

She was more than positive Akihiko would lecture her about having gone missing before even giving himself the chance to get a good look at her. Because she could tell she looked like shit. She could feel the dried blood on the side of her face every time the muscles so much as just twitched. Plus, her head was still pounding. She wouldn’t be surprised if she had another minor concussion due to this new injury.

 

Damn, she just couldn’t catch a break.

 

Despite her fatigue, she refused to allow herself to fall asleep. But she hated the fact she couldn’t keep track of the time. Worse yet, she wasn’t even sure how long she had been unconscious for. So that meant she wasn’t sure if it was the middle of the day or still maybe the middle of the night or—Hell, a day or two could’ve passed by now. There was no way for her to tell.

 

There was also no way for her to keep her thoughts at bay.

 

_Why? Damn it, why am I still alive? Why the hell didn’t they just kill me? That would’ve been their opportune moment, and they just let me go. For whatever godforsaken reason, they chose to let me live. Unless… Maybe they assumed trapping me in Tartarus would kill me. Maybe I am dying. Maybe that’s the real reason as to why the door is gone. Maybe it’s not coming back. Maybe I should just…let myself…drift…_

 

So, she leaned back, letting her eyes close.

 

Next thing she knew, she was practically being lifted to her feet. She opened her eyes to see the door for Tartarus had reappeared right before her eyes. Relief swept over Kirika as Persephone gave her the adrenaline rush she needed to get herself back to her feet and out into the empty city. Rather than making her way for the dorm, though, she decided she would go to the brick house for the night. Sure, she had never wanted to see the place again, but it would allow her to rest without any sort of disturbance. Without any lectures or interrogations. So that’s where she headed, ignoring the coffins along the way.

 

Once she got there—using practically all her energy to crawl through the window—she stumbled her way to the chilled futon. She made herself as comfortable as she possibly could, but still refused to sleep. Her peace of mind was a bit shaken, and just the thought of sleeping made her paranoid.

 

For once, though, Persephone didn’t feel the same. So, Persephone worked to exhaust her even further. And soon enough, Kirika was having a difficult time keeping her eyelids from drooping…


	89. November 28th, 2009

When Kirika woke up next, the sun was already setting. So, she quickly got up and got out of the brick house. She made her way through Iwatodai, approaching the first person she came across.

 

“Excuse me, sir, this may sound strange, but could you tell me what day it is?” she asked the man.

 

He eyed her precariously. “The twenty-eighth of November.”

 

Her eyes widened. “W-what?”

 

Rather than saying anything else, he continued on his way. Confused, she also continued towards the dorm, relishing in the fact that six days had somehow passed. The others were going to be pissed. And Akihiko… Shit. He was probably so—

 

She lost her train of thought when she realised she was receiving some very odd stares from more of the people who were passing her by. That was when she recalled the dried blood on the side of her face. So, she threw the hood of her jacket up to cover herself.

 

Once she arrived outside the dorm, she stopped. Keeping her hood up, she took a deep breath before walking up the steps and through the front door. She just wanted to get this lecture over and done with.

 

“Where the hell have you been?” Akihiko said almost instantaneously. “It’s been six days. Did you decide to just take some time off or something?”

 

She swallowed hard before pulling her hood down, revealing her blood-dried—and most likely bruised—face.

 

His eyes widened. “Kiri…”

 

Mitsuru gasped. “What happened?”

 

Koromaru whimpered, walking over to her and nuzzling Kirika’s legs. “I was ambushed by Strega,” she said as she leaned over to pet the dog. “They took me into Tartarus and Takaya pistol whipped me. As to why he didn’t just kill me, I’m not entirely sure, but…” She shrugged her shoulders, trailing off. “Either way, I guess I was pretty much stuck on the base floor for a good five days or whatever.” She swayed a little as she straightened herself, and Akihiko helped her to the couch, Koromaru trailing along behind them. “Oh, and I guess they broke Chidori out of the hospital. So, she’s helping them again.”

 

“Speaking of, we should probably take you to the hospital,” Fuuka said as she walked in with a warm cloth.

 

Akihiko took it and started gently dabbing at the dried blood and cut. “I agree. You might have another concussion.”

 

Kirika closed her eyes. “I don’t think so. I mean, this doesn’t feel anything like the last one. Ugh. I just can’t believe it’s been six frigging days. It didn’t feel like I had been stuck in Tartarus for that long.”

 

“Oh, you weren’t,” Yukari said. “You were technically only in there for six hours, but that’s just the equivalent to six days out here.”

 

“That…makes sense.” She flinched when Akihiko applied a little too much pressure to her head. “Ouch.”

 

He froze. “Sorry.”

 

“It’s fine.”

 

“How are you feeling, Senpai?” Ken said.

 

“Exhausted. I could probably sleep for six days now.”

 

“I can’t believe this happened,” Mitsuru said. “We should’ve gone to Tartarus. Then we would’ve been able to retrieve you sooner.”

 

“Uh, yeah. Why the hell haven’t you guys been to Tartarus in almost a week?”

 

“There has been a lot going on,” Aigis spoke up. “Including another casualty.”

 

Now Kirika’s eyes shot open. “What?” She rapidly looked around the lounge. “Hold on, but…everyone’s here.”

 

“Not a member of SEES,” Minato said.

 

“By the way,” Junpei then started, “Chidori isn’t working with Strega.”

 

And that was all she needed to hear to figure it out. “Oh my god… Iori, I’m so—” She let out a heavy sigh. “What happened?”

 

“She gave her life for mine.”

 

“She took a bullet for you?”

 

“No. I took the bullet. Then she literally gave me her life to save mine.”

 

Her breath caught in her throat. “Wow…”

 

He nodded. “Yeah.”

 

“Hmm.” She thought for a moment, then she sighed once she remembered. “Shit, that’s right… That’s why Strega ambushed me. They didn’t want me interfering with whatever it was they had planned that night.”

 

“So that means they’ve figured out your ability,” Mitsuru said.

 

“The cut doesn’t actually seem to be too deep,” Akihiko then said, having managed to finally clean off the blood. “I mean, it doesn’t require stitching, which is good since it’s already been six days. It is still bruised and a little swollen, though.” He gently traced his thumb over it, causing Kirika to twitch. “It’ll most likely scar.”

 

“First a bullet to the abs, and now a pistol to the head,” Junpei said. He grinned. “You’re pretty frigging tough, Senpai.” He stood. “Now, if you don’t mind, I have some drawings of a hot dude to admire.” And he headed upstairs.

 

Kirika paused. “Do I wanna know?”

 

“He’s referring to Chidori’s sketchbook,” Yukari said. “She had left it at the hospital and they sent it to him.”

 

“It’s filled with these incredible drawings of Junpei-kun,” Fuuka went on. “Chidori really loved him.”

 

Now Kirika smiled. “That’s sweet…and kinda creepy.”

 

“Well, I think that’s more than enough excitement for today,” Mitsuru said. “Especially for you, Nishioka. You should try to rest.”

 

“I’ve been sleeping for…I don’t even know how many days now.”

 

“You said yourself you could sleep for six days,” Ken said.

 

She glared at him, though she was smiling. “Shut up.”

 

“C’mon, I’ll walk you to your room.” Akihiko got to his feet. “Whether you sleep or not is up to you, but you should still at least be comfortable.”

 

With that, he helped Kirika to her feet, and continued to support her as they made their way up the stairs. Koromaru was still following them. When they reached her bedroom, she knelt before him.

 

“Thanks for worrying about me, boy,” she said, patting his head. He barked in response and she smiled. “I appreciate it.”

 

Akihiko helped her up again and opened her door. He led her into her room, Koromaru remaining seated in the hallway. Akihiko then helped her into her bed.

 

“Speaking of worrying…” she spoke up. “I’m sorry.”

 

“For?”

 

She shrugged her shoulders. “For concerning you or—or possibly even scaring you into thinking that—that I may have—”

 

“Y’know, as a matter of fact,” he said, brushing some of her hair away from the cut, “I wasn’t under the impression you had taken off.”

 

“No offence, but that was the very first thing you asked me when I walked through the door.”

 

He paused, swallowing hard. “Sorry, guess I just…” He let out a heavy sigh. “Don’t get me wrong, the thought was nagging at the back of my mind, but that still wasn’t the conclusion I had jumped to.”

 

“No?”

 

“No. I mean, obviously I was scared, but—”

 

She leaned up and kissed him before he could get the rest of the words out. He placed a gentle hand on her shoulder as he kissed her back.

 

He smiled when they broke apart. “I trust you.”

 

She returned the smile. “My head is spinning.”

 

He carefully laid her down, brushing her hair out of her face once again. She leaned into the touch. “Please…don’t scare me like that again.”

 

She closed her eyes, still smiling. “Seems like a reasonable request. Not that I can really make any solid promises, but I can at least try.”

 

“That’s all I ask.” He paused. “I should’ve been with you. Then maybe this wouldn’t have happened.”

 

Her eyes fluttered back open at this. “Don’t blame yourself. Not like we knew they were gonna pull a stunt like this.”

 

“Still…I should’ve been there.”

 

“I know you don’t wanna hear it, Aki, but I ain’t some damsel in distress. I don’t need you to save me.”

 

“There has to be something I can do for you.”

 

Her eyes were drooping shut again. “I dunno.” Hell, she already felt half asleep. “Maybe you could run away with me someday.”

 

“Hmm.” He draped the blankets over her. “Do you want anything before I go?”

 

“I’m all set for now.”

 

“Well, I’ll bring you a glass of water, just in case. Then I’ll check on you again in a couple hours.”

 

“If that’ll make you feel better.”

 

With that, Akihiko took his leave. Kirika tried making herself a bit more comfortable, but it proved to be difficult seeing as her wound was on the side of her head she typically preferred resting on. Once she did manage to get snug, though, exhaustion took her over, and she ended up passing out before she even got that glass of water.

 

That was okay, though, because she and Persephone were both at ease.


	90. November 30th, 2009

After sleeping away another day, when Kirika woke up that morning, she came across a note left in the lounge from the group basically forbidding her from going out. They all seemed to be in mutual agreement that she needed more resting time. She was okay with that, though, because she wasn’t really feeling up to going anywhere anyhow.

 

Koromaru consistently followed her around that day, too. He was almost just as bad as Akihiko when it came to refusing to leave her alone. Everywhere she went, he was right at her feet. Even when she went to the ladies’ room; he would sit outside the door and wait patiently for her to finish her business.

 

At one point, she ended up falling asleep on one of the couches in the lounge. And when she woke up, it seemed as if just about everyone was back.

 

Yukari giggled. “Hey, Sleepy-senpai.”

 

Kirika chuckled a bit. “Clever.”

 

“How are you feeling?” Fuuka said.

 

“I’m getting there.”

 

“I’m glad to hear that.”

 

“Did you take it easy today?” Akihiko said, sitting in the armchair closest to her.

 

“I did, yeah.” She sat up slowly, as to keep herself steady. “Even ask Koro-chan and let Aigis translate for you.”

 

He laughed. “I believe you.”

 

With that, Kirika picked up a book and started reading. Maybe if she let her mind focus on something else, it wouldn’t be so stuck on the stinging pain she was still feeling from the cut on her temple. The swelling had gone down, but it was still bruised, and it still hurt to put any sort of pressure on it.

 

A while later, Junpei came down into the lounge, except he wasn’t alone.

 

“See you later, Ryoji,” he said. “And hey, stop freaking out about your exams. I didn’t study, either.”

 

Yukari sighed. “But then again, you never do.”

 

That was when Minato returned to the dorm.

 

“Oh, hi,” the stranger greeted him. “What’s up? Studying?” He paused. “You know, I’m here a lot, but I hardly ever run into you. Strange, huh? Oh well, I’m out of here.” He looked around the lounge. “Hold on, I’ve never run into you, either.”

 

Kirika took a deep breath, knowing exactly who that comment was directed at. She chose to continue reading rather than acknowledge him.

 

“You don’t attend Gekkoukan, do you?” the guy said to her, now standing behind the couch.

 

She paused. “I do not.”

 

“Didn’t think so. I mean,” he leaned on the back of the couch, “there’s no way I could’ve missed the most beautiful woman in the city. Maybe even in the world.”

 

She flipped the page of her book. “Weren’t you leaving?”

 

“Uh…y-yeah.” He walked back towards the door.

 

“Oh, by the way,” she glanced over her shoulder, “hit on me again and I’ll hit you in the face.”

 

He swallowed hard. “Message received.”

 

“Hmm. Smart boy.”

 

“At least let me formally introduce myself.”

 

“I don’t care.”

 

But then there was a hand in front of her anyway. “Ryoji Mochizuki.”

 

That was when she finally looked over at him. And as soon as her eyes locked with his, an overwhelming sense of fear and panic swept over her. She could no longer remember how to breathe. Her head became heavy and she couldn’t think straight. She felt as if her consciousness was draining. Then Persephone started pounding inside her, telling her to get out of there. To run. Hell, never had she felt such a strong urge to do so. Not since she was a little girl. So, she put the book down, got up, and just walked away.

 

For whatever reason, only one word came to mind when she had looked at this boy. One mortal word…

 

“Kiri?” she heard Akihiko call after her.

 

“Sorry, just…a little dizzy,” she said.

 

“Guess that’s my cue to leave,” Ryoji said. “Later.” And he left.

 

“If you’re feeling dizzy then you should sit back down,” Akihiko said. He walked over to her to guide her back to the couch. “What was that about?”

 

“You look pale,” Fuuka said.

 

“Was that Ryoji-san?” Aigis suddenly asked, having joined them from upstairs.

 

“Yeah, he said he was going home,” Yukari said.

 

“What was he doing here?”

 

“He’s been coming here a lot ever since he started hanging around with Junpei,” Fuuka said.

 

“But visitors aren’t allowed here.”

 

“Yeah, but Mitsuru-Senpai said that it’s okay during the day,” Junpei said.

 

“I don’t think we need to worry about Ryoji-kun,” Fuuka went on.

 

“He’s…dangerous,” Aigis said.

 

“Who? Ryoji-kun?”

 

“Come to think of it,” Yukari started, “he was hitting on Mitsuru-senpai the first time he met her.”

 

Akihiko raised an eyebrow. “He was?”

 

She nodded. “And now he just hit on Nishioka-san the first time he met her.”

 

“I agree with Aigis,” Kirika spoke up. “About him being dangerous, I mean. There’s just something about him I don’t like. I can’t put my finger on it, but something’s off.” She steadied her breathing. “Persephone feels it, too.”

 

Fuuka considered this. “But having him around has really cheered up Junpei-kun.”

 

Junpei simply shrugged his shoulders. “Well, it’s not like moping around’s gonna bring her back…”

 

“That is true,” Aigis said. “I envy you, Junpei. I am a machine, so I cannot understand how it feels to ‘live.’”

 

“But you don’t seem that different.”

 

“However, it is more accurate to say that I am ‘functioning’ as opposed to living. There are times when I malfunction, but I can always be repaired.”

 

“So, if we were all like you, we wouldn’t have to worry about dying…” He sighed, his gaze falling to the floor. “Uh, sorry… Hey, I don’t have time to talk. I seriously gotta go study. Hey, shouldn’t you guys be studying, too? I heard math’s gonna be a killer.”

 

“You wait until now to tell us that?” Yukari said. She rolled her eyes at him. “I guess we should all call it a night, then.”

 

Everyone then started for their rooms. Akihiko when to help Kirika, but she gestured that she was okay. He sighed and walked off without a fight.

 

“I should not possess the gift of ‘life…’” Aigis spoke up once only she, Minato, and Kirika were left in the lounge. “A ‘living’ weapon is difficult to operate. However, I believe I understand the concept of loss. Should you ever be harmed, I—”

 

“You’re overanalysing,” Minato spoke up.

 

“I am sorry. I am just…concerned. You are very special to me. I do not know why, but I always want to be by your side. I want to protect you.” She paused. “I apologise for interrupting you. I will leave you to your studies. Goodnight.”

 

With that, he headed upstairs. Kirika then joined Aigis by her side.

 

“Ryoji Mochizuki is dangerous,” Aigis went on. “What is this uneasiness?”

 

“Nerves mixed with fear,” Kirika said.

 

She thought for a moment. “I am a machine. I cannot die, so they will not have to grieve for me. I must do something. I do not want them to suffer anymore.”

 

“Aigis, just because you can’t technically die…” She let out a heavy sigh. “Whatever it is you may be planning, just be careful. And keep in mind that we don’t want you to suffer, either.”

 

“I appreciate your kind sentiment.”

 

She smiled sheepishly. “I can also help, y’know. I’m here to protect them, too.”

 

“Thank you, but I believe you have been injured enough.”

 

Now she laughed. “Not a bad point.”

 

With that, the two of them also headed up to the third floor and to their separate rooms. Kirika crawled under the covers, curling up. Persephone still felt anxious over what had happened earlier. She was still telling Kirika to get out of there and she didn’t like that. She didn’t like how she now felt the urge to take off again. To run. Just like that.

 

What she liked even less, though, was the feeling she had received from Ryoji Mochizuki. That sensation of dread. What about him was there to be so afraid of? And why him? He seemed normal enough. But the fact that Aigis also believed him to be dangerous was another red flag to her. Kirika couldn’t just ignore this. And she wouldn’t. Instead, she was gonna get to the bottom of it. No matter what.

 

After all, this was also her fight.


	91. December 2nd, 2009

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Goddess, I can't believe it's December already... I also can't believe I've been posting/updating this story since frigging April x.x lmao Just a few months left, though, and then it'll be over.

Kirika’s nightmare woke her up just in time for the turn of the Dark Hour. Rather than wasting any time laying in bed, though, she practically jumped out of it and headed down to Akihiko’s room. She didn’t bother knocking, either.

 

“Kiri?” he said, sitting up. He must’ve been able to sense her urgency.

 

“Something’s wrong,” she said as she sat on the edge of his bed. “Persephone’s freaking out and I can’t breathe and my head is spinning and—”

 

“Hey, hey, calm down.” He rubbed her shoulders. “Did something happen?”

 

“I don’t know… I had a bad dream.”

 

“What was it about?”

 

“I was a little girl, a-and I was running from—from some _thing_. I’m not sure what, exactly, but I was on the Moonlight Bridge… I-it’s a dream I’ve had be—I’ve had more than once, but something about it felt almost real this time.”

 

“Hold on, you’ve had this dream before?”

 

“Plenty of times.” She paused. “Remember back in September during the typhoon? You came downstairs because you heard something fall and it had just been me falling off the sofa? Yeah, that was because of the dream.”

 

“This is still the first I’ve heard of it.”

 

“Yeah, well, this is the first time I’ve dreamt it since then and a lot has also changed since then.” She let out a heavy sigh. “It usually only occurs when Persephone feels as if she’s in an exceptional amount of danger. Well, when _Idun_ felt that way, at least. This is the first I’ve had it since I gained Persephone.”

 

“Why does she feel like she’s in danger right now?”

 

“I wish I knew.”

 

He paused. “Why did she feel like she was in danger back in September?”

 

“C’mon, is that really what’s important right now? Hell, it was probably because of the damn typhoon. Not what matters, though.”

 

“Right. Sorry.”

 

“Sorry to wake you, Senpai,” Fuuka suddenly said telepathically, “but there’s an issue. Please come to the fourth floor immediately.”

 

Kirika’s stomach dropped. “I don’t like this, Aki.”

 

“Stay here, then.”

 

“And risk any of you getting hurt? Hell no.”

 

The two of them then made their way up to the Command Room, along with the rest of the group.

 

“Hey, what’s going on?” Junpei said.

 

“We need to go to the Moonlight Bridge,” Mitsuru said.

 

Kirika gripped Akihiko’s arm, her stomach flipping. “Why?”

 

“Aigis is there,” Yukari said. “We need to make sure she’s okay. It’s not like her to just wander off.”

 

She let out a shaky breath. “Let’s go.”

 

So, they left the dorm and made their way for the dreaded bridge. Once it was in sight, Koromaru ran ahead. When they caught up with him, they saw he had run to Aigis, who looked as if she had taken massive damage. He seemed to be barking out of concern.

 

Yukari’s eyes widened. “Aigis!”

 

“I’m sorry…” Aigis spoke up. “I—I…remember everything… Who I am… Who _he_ is…” She gestured towards Minato. He crouched down beside her and took her hand in his. “I know why I wanted to be by your side. I’m sorry…I failed…”

 

“Save your energy,” he said.

 

“I’m…sorry…”

 

“There’s no need for you to apologise,” a familiar male voice said. Ryoji then revealed himself to the group.

 

Junpei’s eyes widened. “You?”

 

“Ryoji-kun?” Yukari said. “Wait, what’re you doing here?”

 

Aigis’ hand dropped as she began to malfunction.

 

“Aigis,” Fuuka said.

 

“What’s going on?” Akihiko said.

 

Ryoji shook his head. “It’s all my fault…”

 

He stepped forward, but Kirika reached for his hand to stop him. “Don’t—” Hell, did she feel sick. And there was Persephone again, telling her to run.

 

“Akihiko, wait,” Mitsuru went on. “He’s not showing any signs of aggression.” She put her focus on Ryoji. “Tell us…who are you? _What_ are you?”

 

“I’m the same as the beings you call Shadows,” Ryoji said.

 

“You’re a Shadow?” Junpei said.

 

“I’m the embodiment of all Shadows… The Appriser, born from the union of the twelve Arcana.”

 

“The Appriser?” Yukari said.

 

“I remember everything now… The frightening truth about myself…and Shadows.” He paused, looking defeated. “It’s all so hard to believe…” He dropped to his knees.

 

“You know the truth about Shadows?” Mitsuru said.

 

“Yes. Shadows are here to facilitate the rebirth of the maternal being. She will begin to awaken as she is drawn to me… The Appriser.”

 

“You? You’re The Appriser?”

 

He only nodded.

 

“What is this maternal being?” Fuuka said.

 

“She is a great entity… There is no comparable word in your language for her.” Another pause. “Ten years ago, a man collected a great number of Shadows and contained them in a laboratory. That’s when I was born. But the unification was interrupted, and I awoke in an incomplete state. Not long after, I fell to Aigis…as she did to me.”

 

“Aigis?” Junpei said. “Is that true? Ryoji?”

 

“She knew she could not defeat me. So, in an act of desperation, she sealed me within a child who happened to be standing nearby. That child grew up, carrying me inside him. And by a twist of fate, he later returned here…as a transfer student.”

 

“You mean…” Yukari started, her gaze turning towards Minato.

 

“Yes. I lived inside him. His special Persona awakened…as did the twelve Shadows. All in order to become one with me.”

 

“Ryoji, you’re The Appriser?” Junpei went on. “A-and you were inside him? None of this makes sense.”

 

“It’s all my fault… I’m sorry. There’s more I need…to tell you…” Before he could speak another word, he passed out.

 

“Ryoji-kun,” Fuuka said.

 

“He appears to be exhausted,” Mitsuru stated. “Let’s let him rest. We have Aigis to attend to as well. We’ll continue our talk later.” She looked around the group. “Nishioka, are you feeling all right? You look pale.”

 

Kirika swallowed hard. “I knew there was a reason to hate this bridge. At first, I thought it was because this was where we fought the twelfth Shadow, but… There’s something else. Something more. Something is seriously wrong.” She shook her head. “Persephone wants me to run again, but I’m not going to run. Not this time.” She took a deep, shaky breath. “This time…”

 

She began to sway, and Akihiko took hold of her elbows to steady her. And he kept his arms around her as they all made their way back to the dorm.

 

Her urge to take off decreased with him holding her.


	92. December 3rd, 2009

That afternoon, Ryoji awoke from his rest. And that evening, he and the group gathered in the Command Room. Kirika was still feeling sick, but she needed to be a part of this. She needed to face him head-on. She needed to know why Persephone filled her with a sense of trepidation while in his company.

 

“Is everyone present?” Mitsuru prompted.

 

“Are you okay, Ryoji-kun?” Fuuka then said.

 

“Yeah, I’m okay. Thanks,” Ryoji said. “Besides, there’s more I have to tell you guys.”

 

“Ryoji-kun…” Yukari said.

 

“Yes, there are many questions we need answered.” There was no sympathy in Mitsuru’s voice. “To begin with, you said Shadows were here to facilitate the rebirth of the maternal being… Please elaborate on this.”

 

“The maternal being is called Nyx,” Ryoji said.

 

“Who the hell’s Nyx?” Junpei asked.

 

“Nyx is the mother of Shadows. In ancient times, she bestowed ‘Death’ to this world. If she is awakened, darkness will once again cover the land, and all life will vanish.”

 

“You mean everyone will die?” Akihiko said.

 

“All life will vanish?” Mitsuru said. “Th-then that must mean…”

 

“Apathy Syndrome becomes inflicted upon the entire world,” Kirika spoke up, her voice soft, “and we all become a part of the Lost.”

 

“The Fall…” Mitsuru realised.

 

“But it’s still possible to keep it from happening, right?” Yukari said. Ryoji only looked away. Her eyes widened. “Wh-what? There’s no way to prevent it?”

 

Ryoji still refused to make eye contact. “I’m sorry…”

 

“Wait, what’re you apologising for? Are you saying it’s for certain?”

 

“Of course it is, Takeba,” Kirika said. “Death is unavoidable to begin with. So why the hell would this be any different?”

 

“Kiri,” Akihiko stopped her.

 

Ryoji sighed. “Either way, that is what I’m saying… You heard the bell. I’m The Appriser. The Appriser of Death. My existence if the affirmation of the Fall.”

 

Akihiko now shook his head. “When? When will it happen?”

 

“I’m afraid you will not live to see spring.”

 

“But…” Junpei’s eyes widened, “…that’s not too far away,” He looked around at the rest of the group before laughing fretfully. “Wh-what’re you guys freaking out about? All we have to do is defeat this Nyx. And that won’t be a problem because we’ve never lost. Plus, Nishioka-san—”

 

Kirika clenched her jaw. “Don’t you dare say it, Iori…”

 

“But—”

 

“Defeating Nyx is…impossible,” Ryoji went on. “It has nothing to do with strength, ability, power, or a matter of good protection. Just as all living things die…and the flow of time is continuous… Nyx cannot be defeated.”

 

Now Junpei looked angry. “What? That’s bullshit.”

 

Ken’s gaze was on the floor. “This is all so sudden…”

 

“I was born from a collection of Shadows,” Ryoji still continued. “But now I have a human form… So, I can talk with you, laugh with you, cry with you… All gifts I received because I was inside him.” He gestured towards Minato. “So,” he paused, “I can give you a choice.”

 

“A choice?” Yukari said.

 

“Nyx’s coming cannot be avoided. But it is possible to live in peace until she arrives. You’ll have to…” he swallowed hard, “kill me. If I were to disappear, all memories of the Dark Hour would disappear with me, as would any recollection of the fate that awaits you. You won’t remember anything. The coming of the Fall will be instantaneous…and you will not suffer.”

 

“We’ll forget everything?” Mitsuru said.

 

“You’ll be able to return to your normal lives. And in doing so, the time until the Fall will be slightly delayed. In essence, I am the same as Nyx and cannot be killed. But thanks to him,” he gestured again to Minato, “there’s a part of me that’s _human_. So, if death comes from his hands, I think it may be possible.”

 

“Ryoji-kun…” Fuuka said.

 

“If you don’t kill me, you will suffer more than you could ever imagine. With no hope for salvation, you will live every day paralysed by the fear of your impending death. And I—I don’t want you to have to endure such pain.”

 

“I don’t want my memories to be erased,” Yukari said. “To forget everything would be like hiding from the truth.”

 

“Would that really be such a bad thing? All that awaits you now is despair. You don’t know the terror of absolute death.” He let out another sigh. “Please, don’t make your decision without at least thinking about what I’ve said.”

 

Ken shook his head. “Why is this happening?”

 

“I will disappear with the coming of Nyx anyways. So, don’t worry about me.” He rose to his feet. “I’ll be back on New Year’s Eve…” He took one last look at everyone before leaving the Command Room.

 

“H-hey, Ryoji, wait,” Junpei called after him.

 

“Wait,” Fuuka stopped him as he started to go after Ryoji. “I can’t sense him anymore. Ryoji-kun’s no longer here…”

 

“Are you sure?” Akihiko said.

 

“Yes…”

 

“Ryoji-kun…” Yukari said.

 

“We will see him again,” Mitsuru said. “On New Year’s Eve.”

 

Junpei thought for a moment. “H-hey, what were you talking about last night, Nishioka-san?” he then asked. “What felt so wrong?”

 

“I can only imagine it was this information,” Kirika said. “Perhaps I’ve somehow always known this was going to happen, even if only subconsciously.”

 

“No wonder you didn’t like him when you first met him,” Yukari said.

 

She nodded. “I think that was what I sensed from him that evening. Death.” She sighed out of exasperation. “Tch. I knew there was something off about him.”

 

“Hmm.” Mitsuru seemed to be considering something. As if she was debating whether or not to pursue the topic. “There is something else I’ve had on my mind for quite some time now,” she spoke up.

 

“Yeah?” Kirika said. She had a feeling she knew exactly what was on her mind.

 

“It goes back to the night the Chairman attacked us. He mentioned something about how you could’ve warned us.” She now lifted her gaze to meet Kirika’s. “What exactly had he meant by that?”

 

Her breath caught in her throat. “I do palm and tarot readings around the city,” she began without hesitation. “Some of you know that already, but… Anyway, Ikutsuki had come to me one evening before I joined the group. Before I had even been shot. I did a tarot reading for him and his question in focus had been something about if his lifelong goal would be successful or not. Now I realise he must have been referring to becoming the so-called King of the new world after the Fall or whatever that bullshit was.” She shook her head. “During his reading… Well, it had been so _negative_. It explained everything so perfectly, though. What he wanted out of life. The failure with the goal in the past. His success during the present because of you guys—us—unknowingly fighting for it.” She paused. “The card he had received for his final result had been the Tower, which typically stands for change and disruption and misery and deception and ruin…but also for unexpected events and termination and breakthroughs.” Another pause. “At first, I wasn’t sure if that meant his goal would fail yet again or if he would finally be successful and that was what his goal would bring. Now I know that technically it meant both, but in the long run, it was referring to his own downfall rather than the world’s.” She thought for a moment. “Tch. Then again, I guess it still refers to the world, as well.”

 

“That’s…intense,” Junpei spoke up after a moment of silence.

 

“When you met him after joining the group, though, he acted as if you were a stranger,” Akihiko said.

 

“I know, so I just went along with it,” Kirika said. “At first, I thought, y’know, maybe he truly didn’t recognise me. After a while, though…I could tell he did. And I could tell he knew that I didn’t trust him, but he didn’t care. He was so…pretentious. I dunno. But I do know I had a bad feeling about him from the get-go. From the moment he walked up to me for the tarot reading.”

 

“Is there a reason you never brought any that up?” Mitsuru said.

 

She shrugged her shoulders. “I didn’t think it was my place. And I truly believe Ikutsuki knew I felt that way. He knew I wouldn’t say a word on the matter because I felt as if I would’ve been stepping out of line. Plus, Shinji came across me right after I had finished the reading for Ikutsuki, and I mentioned to him how it had been the most negative reading I’d ever done, and Shinji looked at me like I was crazy.”

 

“So, he saw who it had been and just assumed you had done an inaccurate reading?” Ken said.

 

“Can’t blame him, either.”

 

“Yes, the Chairman caught us all by surprise with his betrayal,” Mitsuru went on. “So, of course, Shinjiro’s assumption of inaccuracy would’ve been understandable.”

 

Kirika paused. “Should I have said something? I mean, I hadn’t wanted to overstep any boundaries or put false doubt in your minds.”

 

“Oh, no, it’s fine. I had just been curious about the comment, is all. And I also understand why you wouldn’t have wanted to bring it up to us. For someone who had just joined the group to make an accusation as such… Well, I probably would’ve been more suspicious of you in that matter.”

 

She chuckled a bit. “Right.”

 

“Well…what now?” Ken then asked. “What do we do about the maternal being?”

 

“Now we all make our own decisions,” Mitsuru said.

 

“Our decisions?” Kirika repeated.

 

“About Ryoji, yes.”

 

“Huh? Why? It’s up to Arisato, after all. He’s the one who’ll have to kill Ryoji. If that’s what he even decides to do.”

 

“It should still be a group choice,” Akihiko said. “After all, he’s not the only one who will be effected by the decision. We’ll all be effected.”

 

“So, what if one person disagrees?”

 

“Enough,” Mitsuru said. “Let’s just try our best to go about our days as we so normally would.”

 

“And ignore the issue at hand?”

 

“That’s not what I said.”

 

Kirika jumped to her feet. “I think I’m gonna be sick.”

 

With that, she rushed out of the Command Room. Akihiko didn’t miss a beat, though, for he was already trailing behind her.

 

“Tell me what’s wrong,” he said.

 

“What’s wrong? You wanna know what’s wrong?”

 

“Yes. Please. Just be honest with me for once.”

 

“Fine. What’s wrong is that the world is coming to an end. What’s wrong is that the fate of humanity lies in the hands of a bunch of frigging teenagers.”

 

He sighed. “I know. I’m scared, too, but—”

 

“No. Do not—” She took a deep, shaky breath. “This isn’t just about being _scared_ anymore. This isn’t just some nightmare I can wake myself up from. This is real. This is—” She shook her head. “This is why I never should’ve returned to this godforsaken city. Why I never should’ve joined this _stupid_ group. I should’ve stayed away. I should’ve moved on. I should’ve taken off when I still had the chance. I should’ve—” She stopped, shaking her head again. “Hell, I don’t think I can do this, Aki.”

 

He took her hands in his and just smiled, trying to comfort her. “You won’t be alone for this, Kiri. We’re in it together. You, me, Amada, Kirijo—”

 

She swallowed hard. “Except that’s what scares me the most. I mean, if it was just me—back when I had no family or friends or anything—it would’ve been less. Y’know? And it wouldn’t have mattered as much.” She pulled her hands away. “I could’ve been lost at any point in these last six and a half years and the world would’ve just kept on turning because no one knew me. Because I was insignificant. No one would’ve had to grieve over me. No one’s life would’ve come to a standstill. Everything would’ve gone on as normal. As if I never even existed. And now—”

 

“Now you’re not alone,” he said again. “Now you are known. You are significant. And before you say anything, just…listen—”

 

“I can’t do this. I-I’m sorry, but I can’t.”

 

“Kiri…”

 

She stepped away from him, unable to look him in the eye as she withdrew herself. Her own eyes were wet with tears, and she was forgetting how to breathe again.

 

Next thing she knew, she was out the door and running through the chilled December air. It was late. The sun was beginning to set. Getting caught during the Dark Hour was something she should’ve been wary of, but at that particular moment… She just couldn’t bring herself to care.

 

She headed for Iwatodai Station and waited for the tram. When the train itself pulled out, she debated boarding it instead. Debated riding it to…hell, just about anywhere. When the tram pulled up, though, she found herself still boarding that one. She couldn’t take off. It wouldn’t be fair. To Persephone. To herself. To—She shook her head, throwing her hood up once she was seated. That was enough thinking for now.

 

She pulled out a cigarette once she stepped off the tram at Port Island Station. Then she made her way to Paulownia Mall. She took a few long drags, allowing the smoke to settle in her lungs. Once she reached the mall, she discarded the butt. She then took a good look at her reflection in the glass windows. Her eyes were sunken. Her skin pale. She looked sick. She let out a heavy sigh before entering the mall. And since she wasn’t sure where else to go, she headed for the police box.

 

“Nishioka,” Officer Kurosawa said. He looked her up and down. “What happened to you? Don’t tell me you attacked again.”

 

She swallowed hard. “Guess you could say that.” Her voice cracked, so she cleared her throat. “Uhm. I know this may seem like an odd request, but is there any chance I could stay here?”

 

He raised an eyebrow at her. “Why?”

 

“Let’s just say I overstayed my welcome at the dorm and leave it at that.”

 

“What are you—?”

 

“Please, sir.”

 

“Hmm.” He paused. “Very well.”

 

“Thank you.”

 

Without so much as another word, Kirika headed straight to the back, leading herself to the holding room. She was exhausted and had no idea what her next move would be. Move. Hmm… Maybe that’s what she had to do. Maybe the time had finally come for her to take off again. Maybe she should have boarded the train after all…

 

Damn it. And to think she was under the impression that she was getting better. That she thought this part of her life was finally coming to close. That she had outgrown the desire to take off without any sort of explanation. Without any reason. Any warning. Except here she was.

 

Maybe she truly had overstayed her welcome.


	93. December 23rd, 2009

The days passed by, and Kirika found herself spending more and more time in the back alley. There was so much going on in her head, so she shrouded herself with pointless conversations and cigarette smoke. She had to keep her mind off things. She didn’t want to think about The Appriser or the Fall or Nyx or any of that bullshit. Hell, she didn’t even want to think about Akihiko or the rest of the group. For that reason, she had been avoiding the school and strip mall as best she could.

 

Before she knew it, about two and a half weeks had gone by. She stopped by the mall for a cup of coffee. Once she got her cup, she managed to swipe half a pack of cigarettes off an unknowing businessman as he passed her by, distracted by the phone call he was on. The cigarettes didn’t help her sunken eyes or pale skin, but hell, at least she could pretend they did.

 

Persephone was still seriously considering having her leave the city. Kirika was still considering it, too. At the same time, though, she didn’t want to run away. She didn’t want to turn her back on Akihiko or the others. Then again, she figured it was a little too late for that. The moment she left the dorm was the moment she turned her back on them. She was sure they all resented her by now. And they would be smart to.

 

Once she found herself back at Port Island Station, she also found herself disinterested in the alley. So, she boarded the tram and headed into Iwatodai. And as she wandered the city, she took a careful look at the citizens. All these people going about their daily lives without the slightest clue that the world would be ending in just a couple months. Maybe even sooner. _You will not live to see spring_. Those few words sent a numbness throughout her entire body.

 

Soon enough, Kirika found herself at the city’s small graveyard. She took a deep breath and made her way to the spot she wished wasn’t so familiar.

 

“Hey, Aragaki,” she started, sitting down in front of Shinjiro’s tombstone. “Sorry for the long absence. There’s just been a lot going on…” She sighed. “Y’know, when I made that promise to you about Aki, I had every intention of keeping it, but now… I’m sorry, but I just don’t know if I can stay in this city for another day. I mean, Persephone sure as hell doesn’t want me to.” She chuckled half-heartedly. “Yeah, I know what you’re thinking. _Moron_. And maybe I am, but this is just too much for me. How am I supposed to protect Akihiko and the others from an undefeatable being? Hell, I can barely protect them from Strega half the time. I can barely protect myself most of the time. So, I just—I don’t get why they still rely on me. I don’t understand how they can still have so much faith in me. I’m totally useless to them.” Her gaze fell to the ground. “Maybe that’s why none of them have tried coming after me since I took off. Maybe they’ve finally figured out they’re better off without me.” She looked up at the tombstone again. “Of course, you wouldn’t agree with that, huh? Instead, you’d just shake your head at me and tell me I’m being ridiculous.” She pursed her lips, nodding. “I am being ridiculous, ain’t I? Tch.” She took a deep breath. “Guess I’ll have to stay in the city for another day, after all.” She smiled sheepishly. “Thank you, Shinji. Even without saying anything, you’ve said it all.”

 

With that, Kirika took her leave. Rather than heading back to Port Island, though, she headed for the dorm. But as soon as she reached the front door, she turned around. It had been twenty days; she couldn’t just waltz back in like it was nothing. So, she decided to stop by the Shrine instead. After all, she hadn’t been there for a while.

 

When she arrived, she was relieved by the familiar face she saw.

 

“Hey, stranger,” she greeted Akihiko.

 

He looked over at her and smiled a hurt smile. “Yo.”

 

She sat down beside him on the bench. “So, I may have overreacted before…”

 

“No, you didn’t. We’re all scared. I mean, there’s no way of knowing—”

 

“Except we know exactly what’s gonna happen. And we can’t just ignore it.”

 

“Does that mean you also think we should fight Nyx? Because I’m ready to look it straight in the eyes.”

 

“I’m sorry, but…” She shook her head. “That’s not what I think.”

 

“Wait…so you want to forget?”

 

Did she want to forget? Of course she did. She’d been wanting to forget about her Persona since the day she awakened to her power. Hell, that’s why she had tried so hard to block everything out. Repress the memories. So, she braced herself for the reaction to come. “More than anything.”

 

He only let out a heavy sigh. “Please come back to the dorm.”

 

“Why?”

 

“Because we’ve been worried about you. Why else? We want you to come back.” He took her hand in his. “I want you to come back.”

 

She paused, examining their intertwined fingers. Relishing in the spark she hadn’t felt for over two weeks. “Say we do forget everything about the Dark Hour,” she started. “Does that mean we would forget each other, as well?”

 

“Why? Is that what you want? Do you regret—?”

 

She squeezed his hand gently. “That’s not what I was getting at.”

 

“Hmm. Come back.”

 

“Then what?”

 

“Then you won’t be alone. Because you don’t have to be alone anymore. Plus, I’ll be able to keep an eye on you. And keep you from smoking, hopefully.”

 

She couldn’t help but laugh. “C’mon…you should hate me by now.”

 

“I thought you were supposed to hate me.”

 

“Oh, I do.”

 

Now he chuckled as well. “Right.”

 

Akihiko then went to kiss Kirika on the cheek, but she turned her head and caught his lips with her own, kissing him deeply. He pulled her even closer to him as he kissed her back. And when their lips broke apart, their foreheads connected.

 

“I missed you,” she said, “and I hate you for that.”

 

He smiled in return. “C’mon, let’s go.”

 

So, they made their way back to the dorm. And when they walked through the front door, no one made a big deal about Kirika being there with Akihiko. They all glanced their way and smiled at her. Koromaru wagged his tail. But they kept the welcoming simple, and she appreciated that more than anything else.

 

Akihiko hadn’t let go of her hand yet. Hell, after having been gone for over two weeks, she wasn’t sure if he would ever let go of it again. She was sure she didn’t mind it, though. And she hated him for that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay. So, I've looked into Japanese burial culture and whatnot to try to get a better idea of how it works in their country and how they handle it and whatnot, but I couldn't really find anything specific. I'm not sure how different it may actually be compared to other cultures, but I just sorta ended up going with a standard interpretation of a graveyard for this story. Not like I had very many other options anyhow, haha


	94. December 24th, 2009

It was close to four o’clock in the evening when there was a knock on Kirika’s bedroom door. Before she could answer it, though, Akihiko let himself in.

 

“Hey, stranger,” she greeted him.

 

“Why do you still address me as _stranger_?”

 

“Because ‘hey, familiar’ sounds weird.”

 

He laughed. “You busy tonight?”

 

“Uh…yeah, actually. I have this date with someone I met at the back alley. He had just been released from prison, but we got to know each other pretty well. He’s trying to get his younger sister through college because his parents are useless alcoholics.”

 

“Oh, he seems like a nice guy.”

 

“Yeah, he’s a total sweetheart.”

 

He laughed some more, shaking his head at her. “What am I gonna do with you?”

 

She shrugged her shoulders. “Well, you could take me out on a date instead. Then I guess I would have to cancel with the other guy.”

 

His cheeks flushed a little. “Are you done yet?”

 

She grinned. “Yes, I’m done. And no, obviously I’m not busy tonight.”

 

“Let’s go out, then.”

 

“Like…on a real date?”

 

“Not if labeling it makes you uncomfortable. Or not if it makes Persephone want to run away.”

 

“Honesty, Aki, not once has she ever felt that way when it’s come to you. And it’s been like that since the very beginning. I mean, why do you think she literally ran straight into you the night I got shot?”

 

He blushed a little deeper. “Guess I never really gave it much thought.”

 

“Well, she went to you because you were familiar to her and because, for whatever odd reason, you’ve always made her feel safe.” She looked over at him. “Stop smiling like an idiot or I won’t go anywhere with you tonight.”

 

Now he cocked his head to the side, trying to hide his little grin. “Sorry.”

 

She rolled her eyes at him. “I hate you.”

 

“Just get ready,” he then said. “I’ll be waiting downstairs.”

 

“Fine.”

 

He took his leave and she prepared herself for the evening. And as she exited her room, Yukari was on her way out of her own.

 

“Hey, Takeba,” she said.

 

She smiled. “Hi, Senpai.”

 

“Where are you off to?”

 

“Oh, I’m spending the evening with Minato.”

 

“So, there is something going on there?”

 

“We haven’t put a label on it yet, but we have sorta been seeing each other for a couple months now. I wouldn’t say it’s anything serious.”

 

She chuckled. “Wow, you’re crushing hard.”

 

“Like you aren’t.”

 

“Except I’m not.”

 

“Oh, please, I’m not stupid.” She paused. “Hey, do you think it’s…weird to think about relationships in the midst of everything going on?”

 

“Despite everything going on, I think we’re all still teenagers. So, I’d say it’s pretty damn normal.”

 

“True enough.”

 

That was the end of the conversation. The two girls made their way down to the lounge together. Yukari and Minato left first. Once they were gone, Kirika grabbed her hoodie and threw it on.

 

“Awe man…” Junpei slumped in his seat. “Everyone seems to have a date tonight. And I’m just stuck sitting around here.”

 

“Go out with Yamagishi,” Kirika said.

 

Fuuka’s eyes widened a bit. “Oh, no, I’d prefer to stay in. No offence, Junpei-kun.”

 

“Then go out with Mitsuru.”

 

Mitsuru’s head lifted away from the book she was reading. “Oh, I’m sorry, but I think I’ll have to pass as well.”

 

She laughed. “Guess you’re shit out of luck, Iori.”

 

“Tch. Yeah, thanks, Senpai.”

 

“Stop torturing the poor guy and let’s go,” Akihiko then said.

 

With that, they bid their farewells and headed out.

 

“So, what’s first on the list?” she said.

 

“Dinner. I figured we could stop by our favourite place.”

 

“I do always seem to be in the mood for ramen.”

 

He laughed, and they continued their way to the strip mall. Kirika dug her hands into her pockets, keeping her shoulders lifted in an attempt to stay warm.

 

“This time of year was always the worst,” she spoke up. “When I was living on the streets, I mean. This is the first time in six and a half years where I actually have a roof over my head.”

 

“It’s crazy how you let yourself suffer through this.”

 

“Didn’t really have any other choice.”

 

They fell silent as they entered Hagakure. They seated themselves and ordered their food. The conversation continued once they their food was in front of them, but it now focused more on the present than anything else. When they finished eating and Akihiko paid, they headed out.

 

“All right. Where to next?” she said.

 

“Follow me,” he said.

 

So, they started on their way to Iwatodai Station. From there, they boarded the tram. And once they arrived at Port Island Station, they headed for Paulownia Mall. During this time, Kirika—freezing again—looked around city.

 

“Do you think the Lost notice the change in temperature?” she thought aloud. “Like, do you think they have any idea how cold it is right now?”

 

“I dunno… I doubt it,” Akihiko said. “Their minds are basically mush, so they can’t really comprehend anything.”

 

“Shouldn’t they be getting sick, then?”

 

“They kind of already are sick.”

 

“Yeah…I guess you have a point.”

 

More silence. When they finally arrived at the mall, they headed straight for the café. Akihiko refused to stick around, though, which Kirika had anticipated. She knew he wasn’t the biggest fan of the café. At least, not a fan of actually spending time there. So, he got a coffee and she got a tea and they went out to embrace the cold yet again.

 

They backtracked to the station, returning to Iwatodai. Then they made their way for the Shrine. That was when they finally sat down.

 

“Thank you for this evening,” she said.

 

He smiled. “C’mon, I should be thanking you.”

 

She sipped her tea. “I’m gonna tell you right now, Aki, you better not have gotten me a damn thing for Christmas. It’s bad enough you got me this frigging chain as a late gift for my birthday.”

 

“Oh? And what if I did?”

 

“I won’t accept it.”

 

“Why don’t you want anything?”

 

“You’ve given me enough already.”

 

He took a sip of his coffee. “Like what?”

 

“Peace of mind, for one,” she started. “Security. Familiarity. Friendship.”

 

“Are you sure you’re the same person I met back in April?”

 

She shook her head. “I know you’re joking, but…no. I’m not that same person. And I have you to thank for that, as well.” She paused, gathering her thoughts. “You helped me come to terms with the error of my ways. You helped me figure out that I couldn’t keep living my life the way I had been. You gave me a reason to stick around. And I know I was already a little past my two-month mark when you asked me to join, but still…”

 

“Let me guess: You hate me for that, right?”

 

She smiled sheepishly. “As cliché as it may sound, I don’t know where I’d be right now if I hadn’t met you. Literally and figuratively. I don’t know where I’d be if I hadn’t become friends with you. If I hadn’t—” She paused as her cheeks reddened for a reason other than the cold. “Just…thank you.”

 

He returned the smile. “You’re welcome.” He took a deep breath. “Kirika, I—”

 

“Don’t… Don’t say it.”

 

“How do you know what I was gonna say?”

 

“Aki, I think I know you well enough by now to be able to read you. So, I’m begging you, please don’t say it.”

 

He nodded his head once. “Okay.”

 

And that was the end of it. They then just sat in silence as they finished their drinks. Once they did finish them, they made their way back to the dorm. Silence still filled the air. Yukari and Minato had already returned, and Mitsuru, Fuuka, and Junpei were sitting in the same exact spots they had been in when they left. And it seemed Ken was still in his room with Koromaru.

 

“Welcome back,” Mitsuru greeted them. “How was your evening?”

 

“It was nice,” Kirika said. “Relaxing.”

 

She smiled. “That’s good. I’m glad you two enjoyed yourselves. I think it’s healthy for all of us to be keeping our minds off decision making.”

 

“Right…” She swallowed hard. “Well, I’m still cold, so I think I’m gonna go upstairs and hop in the shower to try to warm up. Then I might turn in early.”

 

With that, she gave Akihiko a quick kiss on the cheek and hurried upstairs. Letting her body soak in hot water sounded like the best thing in the world, at that moment. Maybe she could let all her worries soak away along with the cold. All her concerns and fears and doubts. The things holding her back and pushing her down.

 

Kirika didn’t have to speak with any of the others to figure out what they wanted. She could already tell they all wanted to face Nyx. That was the last thing she wanted, though. She didn’t want to face Nyx, and she didn’t want to see the group fail. And she knew it wasn’t the time to be cynical, but…

 

She let out a heavy sigh. Shit. Did she truly want to forget everything? Would giving up all these memories really be worth it in the end? Would it make everything better in the long run? Would it make for an even exchange? Forget her powers to forget the fate of the world. The Fall.

 

Maybe the end wouldn’t be so scary if she didn’t have to face it alone.


	95. December 25th, 2009

Christmas day. The first Christmas Kirika would be spending in the company of others after about six and a half years. Not that any of the Christmases spent with her so-called parents had been meaningful in any form. Either way, she wasn’t sure if she was looking forward to it or dreading it. Not that anyone had anything special planned.

 

“Good morning,” she greeted the others as she entered the lounge that morning. “Okay, I’m gonna get this out of the way first thing.” She took a deep breath. “So, I’m not big on the holidays, but I do have one condition for today.”

 

“And what’s that?” Mitsuru said.

 

“Just…no going to Tartarus tonight.”

 

“I agree,” Akihiko said. “For once, I’d actually prefer to sit around doing nothing rather than train in Tartarus.”

 

“And that says a lot.”

 

“Works for me,” Minato went on.

 

The others proceeded to mumble their agreements. Everyone then returned to doing their own thing. Kirika took a seat on the couch next to Akihiko. He was sewing his boxing gloves, and she just watched him for a couple moments. She debated picking up a book to read, but she knew she wouldn’t be able to concentrate. She could still barely wrap her mind around the fact that she wasn’t alone in that moment, so there was no way she’d be able to focus her mind on a book.

 

Suddenly, she jumped back to her feet. “Let’s go for a walk.”

 

Akihiko looked up at her. “Where to?”

 

She shrugged her shoulders. “I’m not sure yet.”

 

He chuckled, shaking his head at her. “Yeah, just let me put these in my room. I’ll be right back down.” And he headed upstairs.

 

“Y’know, I like you dating Sanada-san,” Junpei spoke up.

 

She turned to face him. “It ain’t official.”

 

“Nothing seems to be official to you,” Yukari said.

 

“Shut up.”

 

“Either way,” Junpei continued, “I still like you two together. You’re a hell of a lot nicer now than you were when you first joined. Plus, you do seem genuinely happy.”

 

She held back a blush. “Haven’t we already had this conversation?”

 

He shrugged it off. “Just saying.”

 

“I must say, he has a point,” Mitsuru took over. “You two complement each other quite well.”

 

“Okay, we can stop talking about this now.”

 

Yukari giggled. “Look at her blush.”

 

“All right, I’m ready to go,” Akihiko said as he reentered the lounge.

 

“Great. Me too,” Kirika said.

 

With that, the two of them threw their jackets on and left the dorm. They were quiet for a majority of the walk, just enjoying one another’s company. They would steal glances at each other, every so often catching the other as they looked at the same time. When their eyes met during these instances, they simply laughed.

 

Soon enough, they found themselves at the cemetery.

 

“What do you say?” Kirika spoke up. “Wanna visit an old friend?”

 

Akihiko took a deep breath before nodding. “Sure.”

 

So, they found their way to Shinjiro’s tombstone. Kirika sat before it, as she always did, but Akihiko remained on his feet a good few steps behind her.

 

“Hey, Aragaki. Merry Christmas,” she started. “That’s probably one of the last things you wanna hear, but I figured I might as well say it to someone.” She chuckled. “Things over on this side have been pretty…ordinary. Trust me, you’re not missing out on much.” She paused. “That doesn’t mean you’re not being missed, though. Not that I miss you. I mean, why the hell would I miss you?” She chuckled some more. “Nah, I’m talking about your buddy, Sanada, here.” She looked over her shoulder at Akihiko. “He acts strong for the others, but I can see right through him.” He cocked his head to the side, closing his eyes and she returned her gaze to the tombstone. “He is trying his best, though. He’s fighting his hardest. Tch. That boy is way too damn stubborn for his own good.” Now she smiled. “You’d be proud of him. And don’t worry, I’m still watching out for him. Just like you asked. Just like I promised.” With that, she got back to her feet. “Your turn.”

 

Akihiko’s eyes shot back open. “M-my turn?”

 

“Yeah. You sit down and talk to him now.”

 

“I-I don’t really have anything to say to him.”

 

“I didn’t have anything to say, either. But that still didn’t stop me from sitting down and running my mouth.”

 

He sighed. “Can we please just go?” He turned to walk away.

 

“Aki—”

 

“I’ll talk to him in the spring,” he said. “Then I’ll tell him everything.”

 

She shook her head. “Don’t do this.”

 

“Kiri…” He swallowed hard. “Just trust me on this. Okay? I’ll talk to him when the time is right.”

 

Not in the mood to argue, she gave in. “Fine.”

 

With that, they left the cemetery, continuing on with their aimless walk. And continuing in silence. This time around, though, Kirika kept her eyes to the ground. Until, that is, she noticeably shivered.

 

“Here,” Akihiko said, sliding his jacket off.

 

“No, you’ll freeze.”

 

“Will not. I think it’s actually pretty comfortable out, considering.” He wrapped his jacket around her shoulders. “Besides, I know Persephone can get pretty cold, too.”

 

She couldn’t help but smile. “Thank you.” She grabbed onto the collars of his jacket and pulled it tighter around her.

 

“You’re welcome.” He paused, thinking for a moment. “Still can’t believe it’s Christmas. Fate… Death…” He shook his head. “It’ll be better next year.”

 

“Aki—”

 

“Don’t. We’ll make it through spring. There will be a next year. There will be a next Christmas. Damn it, we’re not gonna let the world end.”

 

“I really don’t wanna talk about this right now. Please. I don’t wanna have this fight. Not again.”

 

“C’mon, we can do it. We’ve yet to lose a battle.”

 

“Yet we’ve still managed to lose four people, and that’s with someone whose Persona is strictly a defender.” She sighed. “It’s too risky.”

 

“You don’t think it’s worth the risk?”

 

“Think what is worth the risk? There is no risk. Shit, we’re gonna die no matter what we do. Everything we’ve fought for up to this point doesn’t—”

 

“Doesn’t what? Doesn’t matter?”

 

She clenched her jaw. “I’m sorry, I just…I don’t see the point in fighting this battle. Not when we’re gonna lose the war either way.”

 

“How do you know?”

 

“Did you not listen to a word Mochizuki said?”

 

“No. I listened to every word, and I’ve considered every word. But that doesn’t change anything. My mind is made up.”

 

“Do all of you feel this way?”

 

“I’m not positive. I just know Amada and I are ready to fight with all we’ve got.”

 

“I see… Maybe if I could fight, I would feel differently.”

 

“Let me train you, then.”

 

“Y’know, if you had suggested that three months ago, I maybe would’ve taken you up on the offer. At this point, though, there’s no way—”

 

“How can you still be so negative?”

 

“I ain’t being negative.”

 

He raised an eyebrow at her. “Seriously?”

 

“Seriously. I’m just being realistic.”

 

“Hmm. Maybe you need to have a little more faith in us.”

 

Her eyes widened at this comment. “Tch.” She shrugged the jacket off her shoulders and shoved it back into his hands. “Whatever.” She then walked away.

 

“Kiri,” he called after her.

 

She ignored him, throwing the hood of her jacket up. And as she continued walking, she kept her eyes on the ground, unaware of the path she was treading. Then, before she knew it, she found herself at the Shrine. So, she headed up the steps and just stood in the middle. It wasn’t long before there was a hand on her shoulder. She turned to see Akihiko standing there.

 

“What are you—?”

 

“I’m done letting you always walk away from me,” he said. “So, from now on, whenever you do walk away, I’m gonna be sure to go right after you. I mean, when you vanished for those couple of weeks, I—” He stopped, his head dropping. “The point is that…you can’t just walk away anymore. Okay? It doesn’t work like that.”

 

She shook her head at him, holding back the tears forming in her eyes. “You have no idea how much I hate you right now.”

 

He smiled. “I think I have a little bit of an idea.” He then wrapped his jacket around her shoulders again. “C’mon, let’s head back.”

 

Rather than respond, she grabbed onto his shirt with one hand and pulled him into a deep kiss. And seeing as he was still holding onto his jacket, he was able to hold her close to him as he kissed her back. Then when they broke apart, Akihiko was still smiling, but Kirika looked somber. So, he let out a little sigh and kissed her softly on the forehead. They then returned to the dorm.

 

Hmm. What a Christmas. Fate. Death. And, all of a sudden, Kirika felt more alone than anything else in—the end of—the world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Whatever-the-Hell-You-May-Celebrate to all my readers (and everyone else)!! :3


	96. December 30th, 2009

Kirika spent the following few days in solitary. The rest of the group was slowly making up their minds about Ryoji’s offer, and she knew she was alone on the matter. She knew she was the only one who didn’t want to face Nyx. But she couldn’t yet figure out how to explain how she felt to the others. Hell, she didn’t even know how to explain herself to Akihiko.

 

Then, the day before New Year’s Eve, there was a knock on her bedroom door. She didn’t have to answer to know who it was.

 

“Hey,” Akihiko said once he let himself in. “Aigis is finally back, so we’re having a group meeting.”

 

She only nodded. They then made their way down to the lounge. The others were already gathered.

 

“I’m back, everyone,” Aigis said. “Sorry to have worried you all.”

 

“Man, I’m glad to see you,” Junpei said. “I was getting nervous.”

 

“Me too,” Fuuka said, “I was fearing the worst…”

 

“I am a machine,” Aigis started, “so I can always be rebuilt. Even if I was completely destroyed, the programming data necessary to recreate me would still exist.”

 

Yukari’s brow furrowed. “Hey, don’t talk about yourself like that.”

 

“They said another week would be required for a complete recovery,” Mitsuru said, “but I had the process expedited.” She paused. “Tomorrow is New Year’s Eve.”

 

“I am sorry for all the trouble I have caused,” Aigis went on. “Mitsuru-san visited me at the lab and told me everything… That must have been difficult for you all to hear.” She faced Minato. “Have you been well? I mean, considering the circumstances.”

 

“I was worried about you,” he said.

 

“I am sorry. It is because I wasn’t strong enough… Ten years ago, I—What I did to you was—”

 

“It was the only way.”

 

“But…if I had not done that to you, you would not be suffering like this.” She paused. “Ryoji has presented you with a difficult choice… Have you made your decision?”

 

He took a moment before responding. “No, I haven’t.”

 

“I have a favour to ask of you. Tomorrow, when Ryoji comes, please… Please kill him. I cannot bear to see everyone hurting like this. Please choose to have your memories erased. Even if…even if it means forgetting everything…and everyone…”

 

Now Yukari’s eyes widened. “A-Aigis, what’re you talking about?”

 

“Yeah, this isn’t like you,” Junpei said.

 

“What’s wrong, Aigis?” Mitsuru said.

 

“Why…?” she continued. “Why did I come back here? My mission is to protect humanity from Shadows. But now I know that I cannot defeat them. So then…why am I here? I am useless. I cannot even shed a tear for you all.”

 

“Oh, Aigis…” Fuuka said.

 

“Why fight when you know that you cannot win? What is the purpose of that? Why are you wasting your lives?”

 

“We’re not wasting our lives,” Akihiko spoke up. “We’re just planning for the future. Right, Ken?”

 

Ken nodded his head once. “Right.”

 

“I—I don’t understand.” Aigis sighed. “It must be because I don’t possess a _life_ …”

 

Junpei laughed. “This has nothing to do with having a life.”

 

“I am a machine. A machine that was created to protect humans from Shadows. But I cannot fulfill that mission with the powers I was given… So then, what is my purpose now? Could someone please tell me?” She dropped to her knees.

 

“We don’t know the answer, Aigis. The only one who can tell you what your purpose is, is you. That’s why we’re having such a hard time making our decision. There’s just no easy answer. But as long as we’re alive, we have to do something… When we see others hurting, we want to help them. So that’s our purpose.”

 

“Can finding one’s purpose really be so simple?”

 

Fuuka knelt beside her. “When I saw you collapse, I realised something… I want to protect you; I don’t want to forget about you.”

 

“Fuuka-san…”

 

“There are times when you will lose sight of your goal,” Mitsuru began, “and you will have to search for it. But if you can’t find it again, then you must set your heart on a new goal. To truly live, you will need to make changes sometimes.”

 

“Do you think I can do that? Do you think I can change?”

 

“Yes. I mean, you’ve changed so much already.” She paused. “Haven’t you noticed? In fact, you’re changing even as we speak.”

 

Aigis looked to Fuuka, who nodded at her, smiling. The two of them then got back to their feet.

 

“I know what my purpose is,” Aigis said. “I am a machine. A machine who is here to _live_. And the one who has given me this new purpose is…me.”

 

Yukari smiled. “Aigis…”

 

“This is the promise I have made to myself. I don’t know how I will do it, but I guess that is a part of living, too.” She looked to the group with a set look of fortitude in her gaze. “Will you allow me to join with you all?”

 

“Of course,” Junpei said. “You’ve always been one of us.”

 

Now she smiled as well. “Thank you. I will be with you all. No matter what happens.”

 

Just then, there was a bright flash of light, and it felt as if time had frozen. As quickly as it happened, though, it was over.

 

“I, for one, don’t get it,” Kirika finally spoke up, her arms folded across her chest as she leaned against the far wall, away from the others.

 

“Huh?” Junpei furrowed his brow. “What do you mean?”

 

“I don’t understand any of you. I mean, I agree with what Aigis originally said.”

 

Mitsuru’s eyes widened a little. “You do?”

 

“Yes… Why am I the one who sounds ridiculous for feeling this way? I think you’re all ridiculous for wanting to fight. I mean, I don’t see the point in—”

 

“Yeah, you’ve made that perfectly clear,” Akihiko said. “Just like you’ve made it perfectly clear you’d rather forget everything.”

 

“Don’t start this again.”

 

“No. Why are you so keen on forgetting? Is it so you’d be able to leave without having to worry about—?”

 

“Tch. If you truly believe I wanna forget just for the sake of forgetting, then you must not know me at all.”

 

“Well, you don’t like getting attached to people, so…”

 

“Excuse me? That’s what you think this is about?”

 

He shrugged his shoulders, his gaze on the floor. “All I know is I sure as hell don’t wanna forget you. So, I guess I just don’t understand—”

 

“No, Aki, you don’t understand.”

 

“Then maybe you could try explaining it for once.”

 

She practically lunged off the wall. “Damn it, I can’t protect you from this! I can’t protect any of you from this. Okay? Persephone isn’t strong enough to face this frigging maternal being. She can’t continuously save you from an undefeatable entity. It isn’t that simple.” She let out a shaky breath, trying with all her might to calm herself down. “Shit. No, I don’t want to forget just for the sake of forgetting. I don’t want to forget just so it would make it easier for me to leave. It doesn’t work like that. Not anymore. The only reason I want to forget is so I can’t remember the fact that I can’t help any of you. That I can’t save you all from this. I don’t wanna live knowing I have this ability that has ultimately become useless. I don’t want to spend every single day waiting for this inevitable end, and for the exact moment when my Persona and her existence no longer matters. I can’t just sit on the sidelines and act like everything is perfectly fine. I can’t just pretend I’m unaware of the fact that each day brings us closer to the day when we—when I can’t—when I won’t be able—” Her breath caught in her throat as she couldn’t find the right words. “So, I’d rather just forget,” she then continued. “That way I don’t have to live with the pain of failure.” Another shaky breath as she forced herself to lower her voice. “You can all fight your hardest battle, but it won’t make a difference. And I can do all I can to protect you for as long as I can, but it won’t stop Nyx from being insurmountable.”

 

The others all fell silent at this. No one knew how to respond. Kirika fell back against the wall before sliding down it, hitting the floor with a hard _thud_. Koromaru instantly went over to sit beside her. And it didn’t take much longer before Akihiko was kneeling beside her, as well.

 

“Why didn’t you tell me this before?” he said.

 

“I didn’t know how.” Her voice cracked.

 

He sighed. “You shouldn’t feel that way.”

 

“Don’t disregard—”

 

“I’m not disregarding anything.” He sat all the way down. “You just don’t have to feel that way.”

 

“Why wouldn’t I feel that way?”

 

“Because we don’t view you that way,” Fuuka said.

 

“Yeah, you’re not useless, Senpai,” Ken said.

 

“Four people have died due to my lack of—”

 

Akihiko shook his head. “Shinji didn’t want you to save him.”

 

“We were still bound to the crosses,” Mitsuru went on, “so you weren’t presented with the opportunity to heal my father.”

 

“And Chidori only died to save me,” Junpei continued.

 

“But if I had been there, then I could’ve—” Kirika said.

 

“Honestly, something tells me it just wouldn’t have been the same. Besides, that was the whole reason why Strega had ambushed you in the first place. So that you wouldn’t have been able to interfere.”

 

“Then, as awful as it may sound, the Chairman really didn’t deserve to be saved,” Yukari finished with a shrug of her shoulders.

 

“Exactly,” Akihiko said. “So, you can’t blame any of those instances on yourself.”

 

“But—”

 

“Stop. Don’t try to say it doesn’t change anything. Especially when it was never your fault to begin with.”

 

“No offence, but I wouldn’t expect any of you to understand.”

 

“That’s not very fair,” Fuuka said.

 

“Life isn’t fair.”

 

“C’mon, that’s so cliché,” Yukari said. “And you’re not the type to use clichés.”

 

“Somehow, she has a point.” Akihiko paused. “What’s on your mind?”

 

“Oh, the usual,” Kirika said. She shrugged her shoulders. “Death. The end of the world. A maternal being. Y’know, nothing new.”

 

“I’m getting real sick of your attitude.”

 

Her eyes widened at this. “Excuse me?”

 

He sighed. “I’m sorry, but—”

 

“I understand, Kirika-san,” Aigis suddenly said. “Even if you do not think any of us do, I know I do.” She kneeled before her. “We may not be the same, but I want you to know that if I can find my purpose, then you will be able to discover your purpose as well.”

 

Now she couldn’t help but smile. “Thank you, Aigis. And I’m proud of you, but I don’t think it’ll be as simple for me.”

 

“Of course not,” Akihiko went on, “because you can’t let anything be easy for you.”

 

“Seeing as she’s being so hard on herself,” Mitsuru spoke up, “then perhaps you should take it easy on her.”

 

“Better yet, let’s just stop discussing me altogether,” Kirika said. She nodded her head. “Yeah? That’d be great, thanks.” She then got back to her feet. Aigis stood with her, but Akihiko remained on the floor. She looked down at him before sighing. “I’m turning in early.”

 

So, she headed back to her bedroom, and no one tried to stop her. Hmm. Solitude. Maybe she was better off alone after all. Maybe it was time for her to take her leave. Tch. Maybe it was time to stop bullying herself with the same hollow threat.

 

Soon enough, there was a knock on the door. Akihiko opened it and let himself in. And without saying a word, he closed the door behind him and joined Kirika on the floor in front of her bed. They sat in silence. There was nothing to talk about. All their words had been exhausted for the evening. So, they would just sit together.

 

It wasn’t long before Kirika leaned over to rest her head on Akihiko’s shoulder. He placed a gentle kiss atop her head and she closed her eyes at the touch. The sentiment. Even after freaking out at him, he still came after her. He still cared for her. How could she possibly want to leave that? She didn’t. So then how could she possibly want to forget it?

 

She didn’t.


	97. December 31st, 2009

New Year’s Eve was a quiet day. A tense day. A somber day. Every breath was sharp or shaky or held for a moment. A moment that seemed to last a lifetime. Barely a word was spoken, and no one seemed willing to prompt a conversation. There was small chitchat here and there, but it was nothing like how the dorm customarily was. The atmosphere concerned Kirika even more.

 

It wasn’t until that evening when Ryoji returned. Everyone gathered in the lounge. The path to the end was about to begin…

 

“Hey, long time no see,” he greeted the group. “Midnight’s just around the corner… At midnight, I will change from this form into something unrecognisable.”  He paused. “So, have you reached a decision?” Minato gave nothing more than a small shrug. “Okay. I’ll be waiting in his room until midnight. Come see me when you have your answer.” He began to walk away.

 

“Ryoji-kun…” Fuuka said.

 

“Oh, and one more thing.” He turned back on Minato. “Don’t let the fact that you’ll have to kill me influence your decision. As I said before, I’m going to disappear anyways. I won’t feel any pain by _dying_. So, there’s no need to worry about me.” Another pause. “I’ll be waiting.” And he left.

 

“Have you made your decision?” Mitsuru asked. Minato turned his gaze downward. “I understand. You don’t need to say anything.” She then turned to face the group. “Have the rest of you made your decision?”

 

“No need to ask me,” Akihiko said.

 

Yukari nodded. “You know how I feel.”

 

“I wouldn’t be here if I wasn’t on board,” Junpei said.

 

Fuuka smiled. “I’m with the rest of you.”

 

“I’m in, too,” Ken said.

 

“I have made my decision as well,” Aigis said.

 

They all looked towards Kirika. She shook her head, sighing. “In the end, it really only comes down to Arisato. I mean, if he does kill Ryoji, none of us will even remember that being his decision anyway.” She stopped, that comment almost surprising herself. “Wow…”

 

“Then…we’re all in agreement, yes?” Mitsuru went on.

 

“Better let him know, then,” Akihiko said. “Okay?”

 

Minato nodded. He headed upstairs to meet Ryoji in his room. As soon as he was out of sight, Kirika made her way for the front door.

 

“Where do you think you’re going?” Mitsuru said.

 

“Nowhere,” she said.

 

And she exited the dorm. She really didn’t go anywhere, though. She just took a seat on the front step. Akihiko was soon sitting beside her.

 

She clenched her jaw. “I changed my mind. I don’t want to forget.”

 

“Kiri—”

 

“What if we don’t forget about just the Dark Hour and Tartarus and all of that bullshit? What if we forget almost everything? What if we forget each other? What if I forget all these things I’ve come to discover about myself over these past few months? What if I revert to a life of skipping around from place to place every two months? Shit… I never thought I’d say this, but I don’t want that.”

 

“Hmm. What do you want?”

 

She took a deep breath. What did she want? She wanted to live a normal life. She wanted a life without the Dark Hour and Tartarus and Shadows and even Personas. She was still more than willing to give all that up. But she was no longer willing to give up her new memories. So, she wanted a life void of all the bad she had experienced since April, and full of all the good she had experienced since April. Damn it, all she wanted was the life of a normal teenage girl.

 

“Well?” he spoke up.

 

“I want to be—” She stopped herself, swallowing hard. Now wasn’t the right time. “We should get back inside.”

 

He nodded. “Guess so.”

 

So, they stood up and headed back inside. Just as the door closed behind them, Minato and Ryoji were on their way down the stairs.

 

“Yo,” Junpei greeted them. “What’s up, Ryoji?”

 

He only sighed. “It’s an unfortunate decision, but it is yours to make.”

 

“That’s right,” Yukari said.

 

“But you can’t defeat Nyx… It’s impossible.”

 

“But we must still try,” Mitsuru said.

 

“Personally, I don’t care if it is impossible,” Akihiko said.

 

“I understand,” Ryoji went on. “It’s almost midnight, so I’ll keep this brief. I’ll tell you where to find Nyx… She’ll be at Tartarus. You must reach the top of the tower before the promised day.”

 

“When’s the promised day?” Yukari asked.

 

“Exactly one month from tomorrow. January 31st, 2010.” He paused. “Nyx will descend to Tartarus…and the world will end. If you go to the top of Tartarus on that day, you’ll be able to face her. The tower exists for the purpose of Nyx’s coming. As The Appriser, I usher Nyx into this world…and Tartarus welcomes her arrival.”

 

“The tower exists for the purpose of Nyx’s coming…” Akihiko considered this comment for a moment. “That’s why it’s called the _Tower of Demise_.” He nodded. “So, if we reach the top, we can fight Nyx?”

 

“Yes, but remember… From today, you will fight against eternal despair. Like I’ve said so many times before, Nyx cannot be defeated. When you face her, you will finally understand this truth. And then you will realise what it is you are trying to stand against.”

 

Mitsuru nodded. “We understand. There’s no need to keep telling us. January 31st… We won’t forget that date.”

 

“Well, I’ll be going on ahead of you, then,” he said. “I want to leave you while I’m still in this form.”

 

“Ryoji-kun…” Fuuka said.

 

He headed for the door and everyone got to their feet. He then stopped. “Aigis…I’m sorry for all the pain and suffering I put you through.”

 

“I won’t forget that you were my enemy…and my friend,” Aigis said.

 

“Aigis…” Yukari said.

 

“Thank you,” Ryoji said. “This will probably be the last time I see you all like this. But I’ll always be watching over you…” He paused. “Well, goodbye.” He walked over to the door and opened it before stopping once more. “Best wishes in the coming year. That’s what you say on New Year’s Eve, right?” He smiled. “See ya.” And he finally took his leave.

 

“Heh, that Ryoji…” Junpei said.

 

With that, the lounge fell silent. It was a heavy silence, but somehow comfortable. And at the turn of the Dark Hour, everyone decided to head up to their bedrooms. Kirika was tempted to stay on the second floor with Akihiko, but she knew she wouldn’t be able to get away with it. So, she decided she would wait for the Dark Hour to end, and then maybe she would sneak down. After all, she’d rather not to be alone with her thoughts. Especially now. Hmm…

 

New year, new beginnings. The beginning of a new end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy New Year!!


	98. January 1st, 2010

Almost as soon as the Dark Hour came to an end and the new year began, Kirika opened her bedroom door to find Akihiko already standing on the other side.

 

“After experiencing so many Dark Hours, you kinda learn how to estimate exactly when it’s gonna end,” he said.

 

She laughed. “Happy New Year.”

 

He smiled in return. “Happy New Year.”

 

“Look at you, sneaking up to my room for a change.”

 

“I’m assuming you were about to sneak down to mine?”

 

“That I was.”

 

“Well, can I come in before we get caught?”

 

She jokingly rolled her eyes. “I guess…”

 

So, she stepped aside to let him in, closing the door behind him. He then grabbed her by the hand, pulling her into him and kissing her deeply. His free arm wrapped around her waist as her free hand rested on his shoulder. And for what seemed like forever, they remained just like that.

 

Once they broke apart, they moved to sit on Kirika’s bed together. Then sitting turned to lying. Akihiko lay flat on his back while Kirika was on her side, resting her head on his chest with his arms wrapped around her. And they enjoyed one another’s comfortably silent company.

 

“Y’know, you never did tell me what it is you want,” he then spoke up as the time was nearing 1:30 in the morning.

 

She smiled. “I can’t tell you.”

 

“Why not?”

 

“My control will fall apart completely if I do.”

 

He chuckled. “Fine. Can I tell you what I want, then?”

 

“Go right ahead.”

 

“I want you to stay—”

 

“I know.”

 

“Let me finish.”

 

“Sorry.”

 

He shook his head at her, still chuckling a little. “I want you to stay because…I want to be with you.”

 

She took a deep breath as she listened to his heartbeat. It was synchronised with her own in the most calming manner. “Do you feel it?” she spoke up.

 

“Huh? Feel what?”

 

“The spark every time we touch.”

 

He pulled her even closer to him. “Yeah, I feel it.” He paused. “Kiri, I know you don’t want me to say it—”

 

“Then don’t say it.”

 

“—but I’m going to say it anyway. And I want you to know that I don’t want you to feel obligated to say it back.” Now she sat up, and he sat up with her. “Kirika…”

 

Damn it, he needed to stop saying her name. He needed to stop looking at her, too. She could feel his gaze burning right through her. Finally, she turned her head towards him and hesitantly raised her eyes to meet his. The look in his eyes was intense, like he was really concentrating on what he was about to say.

 

He leaned in a little closer to her. “I love you.” His voice was barely a whisper.

 

Her breath caught in her throat. She couldn’t bring herself to say it back, though. So, after another silent moment passed, she closed the distance between them to kiss him again. He practically pulled her onto his lap as he kissed her back.

 

“Aki…” she said once she pulled away, “I-I’m sorry.”

 

“Hey,” he held her face in his hands, “don’t apologise. I wanted to say it. I felt the need to say it. That doesn’t mean you need to say it, too.”

 

She smiled sheepishly. “That’s not very fair to you, though.”

 

“C’mon, you know me. So, you should know I don’t mind.”

 

“I mind. I don’t—” She swallowed hard, closing her eyes. “I don’t wanna hurt you. That is the last thing I want.”

 

“Then what do you want?”

 

Her eyes shot back open. “How the hell did you manage to bring this conversation full circle?”

 

He smiled and kissed her in response. “What do you want?” he said again. “Do you want me to run away with you?”

 

“Huh? Where is that coming from?”

 

“I had a feeling you wouldn’t remember.” He shook his head. “The night you came back after you had gotten stuck in Tartarus… You told me you didn’t need me saving you, but maybe I could run away with you someday.”

 

“I said that?”

 

“You did.” He nodded his head once. “So…is that what you want?”

 

 _Is that what you want?_ The truth is, Kirika still wasn’t entirely sure. Discussing the future still scared her. Planning a future scared her. Especially with someone trying to plan their future with her. For so long, she believed she wasn’t even going to have a future. After all, she never imagined making it to eighteen years old. But here she was. Eighteen and only a month away from the end of the world. Yet she still found herself thinking about the future.

 

It was amazing how much things could change.

 

“Kiri?” Akihiko soon spoke up.

 

“Huh? Oh.” She shook her head. “Sorry.”

 

“Well?”

 

“I want—” Her cheeks flushed. “I want this. You.”

 

He pressed his forehead to hers. “You have me.” His voice was barely audible. Then he was chuckling again. “You really hate me right now, don’t you?”

 

“Oh, so frigging much.” She chuckled as she kissed him again. “But that doesn’t change anything.”

 

“Good, I’m glad to hear that.” He sighed, content. “We should try to get some sleep. It’s already past two o’clock.”

 

She nodded. “Okay.”

 

So, they returned to the positions they had been laying in before. Akihiko lying flat, and Kirika on her side. Except this time, she rested her head in the nook his shoulder and arm rather than on his chest. He still had his arms wrapped around her, though, holding her close.

 

She felt warm. She felt safe. She felt at home. She felt…loved. She felt she was able to fall asleep and dream sweetly.

 

A few hours later, Kirika was the one to wake up first. She slipped out of bed and crept out of her room, not wanting to disturb Akihiko. Then at the end of the hall, she saw the rest of the girls.

 

“Good morning,” she greeted them. “Happy New Year.”

 

Yukari smiled. “Happy New Year, Senpai.”

 

“Where are you all off to?” She looked them all up and down. “And in kimonos?”

 

“We’re heading to the Shrine,” Fuuka said.

 

“Would you like to join us?” Aigis said.

 

“Thanks, but I think I’ll pass. Besides, I don’t have a kimono I could throw on.”

 

“I have an extra you could borrow, and I’m sure it would fit you,” Mitsuru said. “So why don’t you come with us?”

 

Kirika considered this. “You know what? Why the hell not?”

 

Mitsuru smiled. “C’est magnifique.”

 

The five girls then headed into Mitsuru’s bedroom. She pulled out her extra kimono, and Kirika changed into it. With that, they made their way to the Shrine for the New Year’s Day festivities. It was enjoyable, for the most part. Totally different than what Kirika was used to.

 

Once the girls got ready to leave, the guys ended up showing up as well. When they did, the girls walked over to them to greet them. They made their exchanges with Junpei, who was busy gawking at each of them individually, making each of them uncomfortable in the process.

 

“Damn it, Sanada-san, you are one lucky son of a bitch,” he said once his eyes landed on Kirika.

 

She pursed her lips. “I will hit you.”

 

“Yeah, I’ll hit you, too,” Akihiko said.

 

Junpei’s eyes widened. “What? It was a compliment…”

 

With that, the group remained at the Shrine for a while longer, but diverted into separate groups. Kirika and Akihiko sat at the bench they would always meet at.

 

“I like the Shrine better when it’s quiet,” he said.

 

“Me too,” she said. “The hustle and bustle kinda takes away from it.”

 

“Yeah.” He paused, clearing his throat. “B-by the way…uhm…y-you look—you do look beautiful.”

 

“You’re not even looking at me,” she teased. “Wait, are you embarrassed?”

 

“W-well…”

 

“Oh, that’s so cute.”

 

“Shut up. I mean, I—I’ve never seen you d-dressed like—like this. A-and it doesn’t really help that I-I know you’re—you’re n-not wearing—”

 

“Not wearing what?”

 

His cheeks turned bright red. “Shut up, you know what…”

 

She laughed. “Gotta admit, I do enjoy seeing you flustered.”

 

“I’m aware.” He sighed, though he did also seem a bit amused. “D-did you make a wish for the new year?”

 

Now she shook her head. “No. I’m not into making wishes or any of that superstitious sort of stuff.”

 

“Yet you read people’s palms for a living.”

 

“Tch. Shut up, that’s different. Besides, I figured I might as well spend some time with the girls for once. And Mitsuru had a kimono to spare. Plus, you were still sleeping and I didn’t want to wake you.”

 

“Hah, thanks.”

 

“C’mon, Senpai, we’re heading back to the dorm now,” Yukari then called to them.

 

With that, the group made their way back to the dorm. Once they arrived, the guys seated themselves around the lounge as the girls went to their bedrooms to change into casual clothing. Then they all made their way back down to the lounge. That was when Kirika and Akihiko separated from the group. They headed to the second floor and sat at the table there.

 

“One month,” he spoke up.

 

She nodded. “Yeah, it’s pretty crazy.”

 

“We’re gonna have to make the most of the time we have left. I’ll have to up my training regimen again.”

 

“Please don’t go overboard, Aki.”

 

“Don’t worry about me.”

 

She raised an eyebrow at him. “Really?”

 

He chuckled. “I know, I know… After everything that’s happened, though, it does feel strangely good to be starting a new year. Even despite what’s supposed to happen at the end of this month.”

 

“I get what you mean.” She let out a heavy sigh. “The fate of the world is riding on us. It’s in the hands of a bunch of frigging teenagers.”

 

“Yeah, you had said that before.”

 

“Well, it still sounds ridiculous to me.”

 

“By the way, thank you for staying.”

 

“Not like I had anywhere else to go…or anywhere else to be.”

 

“No offence, but have you ever?”

 

“Tch. Good point.”

 

“Either way, thank you. I mean, you’ve helped me a lot these last few months. Especially towards the end of the year.”

 

“You’re welcome, Aki.”

 

He reached for her hand and kissed the back of it. A light blush covered her cheeks as she smiled. He then gently squeezed her hand.

 

“What changed your mind?” he spoke up.

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“You’ve been here for almost exactly nine months now, right? That’s way past your two-month limit. So, what made you decided to stick around?”

 

“The group, I guess? I dunno.” She paused, thinking. “Or…well…just you, really. I mean, Persephone has always been the one who has urged me to move from place to place. For whatever reason, though, when it came to you she didn’t want to go anywhere. She still doesn’t.”

 

He blushed lightly. “Maybe I should be thanking Persephone, then.”

 

“In all honesty, she’d probably be more appreciative.”

 

“Do you know yet how much longer you’ll be here?”

 

“Have you not figured it out yet?”

 

“Guess I’m just trying not to get my own hopes up. Just in case.”

 

“Hmm. I’m sorry I’ve put you in that mindset.”

 

“No, it’s fine. I just prefer hearing the definite answers from you. It’s a better reassurance rather than just assuming.”

 

“Yeah, I get that.” She let out a sigh. “Either way, you don’t have to worry about me going anywhere anytime soon.”

 

He smiled. “Good. That’s what I wanted to hear.”

 

“Is there anything else you would like to hear?”

 

“Not until you know you’re ready.”

 

She shook her head at him. “You’re ridiculous.”

 

He shrugged his shoulders. “You’re worth it.”

 

Now she laughed. “Tch. I hate you.”

 

He laughed as well. “For now, I will continue to accept those three words.”

 

Her faced reddened a bit more. “Shut up.”

 

They spent the rest of the day just like that. Teasing each other and enjoying one another’s company. Enjoying the closeness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp. This is it, guys. The last full month of posting/updating. Honestly, I can't believe it's already been nine months lmao Hope everyone has enjoyed the story so far and will continue to enjoy the rest of it. Also, Happy 2019 and may this year be good to you all :3


	99. January 2nd, 2010

Kirika spent the day moving around the city, setting up to do her readings at random places rather than her usual spots. And while she had been too focused on the people—and too tired to really let her surroundings sink in—as she walked back to the dorm that evening, she noticed posters hanging just about everywhere. And they all seemed to be referring to the end of the world.

 

The Fall.

 

She asked a few citizens here and there about the posters. Some figured it was just a dumb prank done by a group of punks. Others claimed it was real deal; that the world truly was coming to its untimely end. But there was a way to be saved. Not that that part interested Kirika in the slightest.

 

“So, uh, what’s with all those posters that seemed to have just appeared over night?” she said once she returned to the dorm.

 

Junpei shrugged his shoulders. “Apparently it has to do with some cult.”

 

“Yeah, I saw a news report about that cult,” Ken said. “They’ve become so big so quickly. Weird, huh?”

 

“That mysterious cult put posters up all over town,” Aigis said, reiterating the original question. “But they have not done anything since then. Not that that is a bad thing. It is just a little unnerving.”

 

“Wait, an actual cult?” Kirika said. “Out of nowhere?”

 

“C’mon, Senpai, haven’t you seen the headlines?” Yukari said. “Y’know, the ones saying _Mysterious Cult in Town_ and _The End Is Near_?”

 

“Uh…no. But people aren’t afraid to talk about it when questioned.”

 

“Huh. Well, I think it’s because of Nyx.”

 

“I heard that cult held a meeting recently,” Fuuka went on. “I wonder how much it will affect this city… I’m really worried.”

 

Kirika shook her head. “Hold on, back up… How could this be about Nyx? How could information like that have gotten around in the blink of an eye?”

 

“Yeah, doesn’t make much sense,” Junpei said, still sounding totally nonchalant about whole ordeal.

 

“Oh, and apparently there’s some way to be saved from the end?”

 

“Yes,” Mitsuru spoke up. “The mantra of the cult is, ‘If you believe, you will be saved.’” She shook her head. “Ridiculous, isn’t it? We will need to keep our guards up. The public seems to be fooled by these words.”

 

“If you believe, you will be saved…” Akihiko rolled his eyes. “Tch. What a joke. Who would buy that?”

 

“Half the city would, apparently,” Kirika said. She sighed. “This is insane. There has to be a way for us to tone it down a notch.”

 

“For now, we can only hope it will pass on its own,” Mitsuru said.

 

“Cults aren’t usually something that just pass or die down or whatever. They’re a pretty serious matter. And just the fact that this one spread so quickly makes it all the more concerning.”

 

“I’m sorry, but there isn’t much we can do.”

 

“Besides, we need to focus on our own group,” Akihiko said. “We can’t occupy our time thinking about a damn cult. We need to prepare ourselves for the battle against Nyx. We only have a little less than a month till we face it.”

 

“True as that may be, I feel like we still shouldn’t just ignore the people of this city. After all, they are some of the people we’re gonna be fighting to save.”

 

“No offence, Senpai, but you’re thinking too much about it,” Junpei said.

 

Her eyes widened a bit. “I’m what? I’m overthinking this? Seriously?”

 

“You’re gonna stress yourself out too much,” Yukari went on.

 

Fuuka nodded in agreement. “You really should take it easy.”

 

“They have a point,” Akihiko said. “Don’t focus on the believers. Focus on us. Focus on the fighters. Be like Shinji and just ignore everyone else.”

 

Kirika couldn’t help but laugh. “Yeah, I guess you guys are right. It’s just the fact that this cult popped up out of nowhere, so it kinda freaked me out.”

 

“Understandable,” Mitsuru said. “But we do have more trying matters to attend to.”

 

“Yeah, I know, I get it.” Another sigh. “I’m completely exhausted, so I’m just gonna turn in early. Let’s try to get to Tartarus tomorrow, though.”

 

With that, she headed up to her room. And who followed her, but Akihiko?

 

“Are you feeling okay?” he checked.

 

“I’m fine.”

 

“Are you sure?” She nodded, and he let out a heavy sigh. “Y’know, Kiri, I don’t like this little…game you tend to play. I mean, there’s almost always something on your mind that’s bothering you, yet you still always somehow manage to be _fine_.”

 

She swallowed hard. “Like I said, I’m just a little freaked out.”

 

“We all are. But we’re not in this alone. You’re not alone anymore, so take advantage of that. Don’t shut yourself down and push us all away as we get closer to the end of the month. That isn’t gonna help anyone.”

 

“End of the month? You mean the end of the world.”

 

“No, I mean the end of the month. Okay. There isn’t gonna be an end of the world.”

 

“I really hope you’re not planning on relying too much on me for this battle.”

 

He sighed again, shaking his head at her. “How many times are we gonna have this same argument? I have faith in you, Kiri. We all do. So, I think it’s about damn time you started having faith in us.” He then walked away.

 

She closed the door once he was gone, and took a seat on her bed. She did have faith in the group. But just because the group had faith in her, didn’t mean she also had faith in herself.

 

And therein lied her fake _fine_.


	100. January 5th, 2010

Over the course of the next few of days, Kirika saw a major increase of the Lost around the city. It was worse than any previous timespan nearing the full moon had been. So much worse. With every direction she turned, there seemed to be at least two or three—probably even more—people suffering from Apathy Syndrome. On top of that, more and more posters about the cult had been popping up, as well as graffiti.

 

“This is already getting out of hand,” she said to Akihiko one evening. They were in his room, away from all the others. “We’re barely a week into the new year and—”

 

“I know,” he said. “Trust me, I know. But there isn’t much we can do. People are gonna believe whatever the hell they wanna believe.”

 

“It’s not just that stupid cult, though. It’s the Lost, too. I’ve never seen this many of them around at once.”

 

“Hmm. Yeah…” He paused, thinking. “As I’m sure you’ve figured out by now,” he then began, “whatever occurs during the Dark Hour is acknowledged differently by the public. That includes attacks by Shadows. So, if a person is found injured, the attack is usually blamed on a robber. And if someone disappears, it’s considered a kidnapping or an abduction.” Another pause. “These incidents are sporadic and are classified as mysterious causes because everything about them is unexplainable. But now the numbers of incidents are increasing so fast that they’re drawing the public’s attention.”

 

“I hadn’t even really thought about that.”

 

“No? Well, I’ve given it a lot of thought.”

 

“I can tell.” She sighed. “Damn it, we’re not even supposed to be thinking about all this bullshit.”

 

“It’s not like we can’t…we just shouldn’t.”

 

“At this point, I’m not saying there’s much of a difference.”

 

They fell silent. They were sitting on the floor, leaning against Akihiko’s bed. He had his head tilted back, resting it on the mattress itself. Kirika, on the other hand, was looking around the room. With the amount of time the two of them spent together, they rarely spent that time in either of their bedrooms. Unless they were actually sleeping, of course. So, she had never thoroughly seen Akihiko’s room before with the lights on. At least, she had never looked past the training equipment. She couldn’t get over the number of trophies and awards he had lining his walls. He truly seemed to be an impressive boxer. Then she remembered…

 

“Hey, do you still have that music box?” she spoke up.

 

“Of course I do,” he said, keeping his head back.

 

“Where is it?”

 

“You don’t need to know.”

 

“The hell do you mean I don’t need to know?”

 

He shrugged his shoulders. “You just don’t.”

 

“Excuse you, but that music box is _my_ property. It belongs to me. So, I don’t care if you don’t think I need to know. I deserve to know. I have the right to know.”

 

“Too bad. The key stays with you and the music box stays with me.”

 

“Oh, is that how this is gonna work?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“What if something happens between us and we end up going our separate ways?”

 

Now he finally lifted his head. “You still keep the key and I still keep the music box. That way we’ll always be connected.”

 

She sighed, chuckling. “You’re ridiculous, Aki.” He gave another shrug as he lay his head back again. She shook her head at him and sat up a bit to glance at the nearby table. There were a few magazines resting on top of it, so she scanned through them. The one on the bottom of the pile grabbed her attention. She grinned. “Is this a magazine with an article on how to pick-up girls?”

 

Akihiko’s eyes shot open wide. “Th-that’s not why I have it.”

 

She pulled the magazine from the pile. “Are you sure? Because the page with the article is folded over for easy access.”

 

“By mistake.”

 

“I don’t think so.” He reached across her, but she sprung away from him, getting to her feet as she flipped the article open. She then cleared her throat. “ _Are you able to make others laugh with a well-timed joke?_ Sure, if acting like an idiot is considered a well-timed joke.”

He chuckled. “Oh, thanks.”

“ _When people speak to you, do you try to respond with pure logic and reason?_ ” she went on. “Tch. That’s a resounding yes.”

 

“No, it’s not.” She cocked an eyebrow at him. “Fine. Not so much anymore, though. I’ve gotten better.”

 

“Well, I suppose you do consider other people’s feelings.”

 

He got to his feet and managed to pry the magazine from Kirika’s hands while she was lost in thought. “Enough of this.” He threw the magazine in the trash.

 

“That’s all right. It came out back in August, so those tips probably don’t work anymore anyway.” She paused. “Did you ever trying using any of those stupid tips on me?”

 

“Tch. Are you kidding? You’d need your own magazine entirely. Besides, like you said, they’re stupid. They’d work on girls like—”

 

“Like your fangirls?”

 

“Please don’t call them that.”

 

“That’s exactly what they are.”

 

He sighed. “Either way…yeah. Girls like them.”

 

She swallowed hard before she started backing away towards the door. “Well, I should probably get out of here before it gets to be too late.”

 

“What? Why? You’re fine staying here for now. We’ll know it’s too late when Mitsuru comes knocking.”

 

She held back a smile. It was sweet how much he wanted her there. How much he wanted to be with her. “I dunno. I’d rather it not get to that point.”

 

“Says the girl who sneaks into my room at least twice a week now.”

 

She laughed some more, blushing lightly. “Shut up.”

 

“C’mon, you know it’s true.”

 

“Doesn’t change the fact that I really should go.”

 

She continued for the door, but he swiftly came up behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist to stop her. He began to pull her back, practically pulling her off her feet at the same time. She continued laughing as she gently kicked her feet, trying to break free of his grasp. Next thing either of them knew, they were tumbling onto his bed. That caused them both to break out into laughter. Kirika then rolled off Akihiko before turning to lean over him instead.

 

“I hate you,” she said.

 

He smiled. “I know.”

 

He lifted his head to capture her lips in a kiss. She smiled as she kissed him back. Then there was a knock on the door. They both froze.

 

“Akihiko?” Mitsuru spoke up from the other side.

 

“I guess that’s my cue,” Kirika said, her voice soft. She pushed herself off the bed and went to open the door.

 

Mitsuru looked a bit embarrassed. “Oh, I—I didn’t realise you were still in here. I hope I wasn’t,” she cleared her throat, “interrupting anything.”

 

“No, you weren’t,” she was quick to respond. “I was actually just leaving.” She turned to Akihiko. “G’night.”

 

He nodded his head once. “Goodnight.”

 

With that, Kirika stepped past Mitsuru and headed up to the third floor. That was when she bumped into the other girls.

 

“Oh, there you are, Senpai,” Fuuka said. “We were under the impression you were in bed already.”

 

“Nope, I was—”

 

“With Akihiko-Senpai.” Yukari giggled. “How cute.”

 

Kirika held back another blush. “Yeah, I’m heading to bed now.”

 

“Have a good night’s rest,” Aigis said.

 

“Thank you.” And she continued the course to her bedroom. Once she was on the other side of the door, she let out a heavy sigh. She then touched the chain and key around her neck. _You keep the key and I keep the music box; that way we’ll always be connected_. She shook her head. “Damn it, Aki…” She smiled. “Just look what you’ve done to me.”


	101. January 7th, 2010

There was a knock on Kirika’s door early that morning. She took a deep breath before answering.

 

“Good morning,” Mitsuru greeted her. “May I come in for a moment?”

 

“Oh. Yeah, sure, of course.” She stepped aside, allowing her entrance. She then closed the door. “What’s up? Is something wrong?”

 

“No, nothing is wrong. I just wanted to apologise again for the other night.”

 

“You really don’t need to.” She shrugged her shoulders. “I shouldn’t have been in Aki’s room that late anyhow.” _Tch. I say that like I’ve never snuck into his room before. That’s beside the point, though._ She shook her head. “Anyway, is that all?”

 

“No, there is something in particular I wanted to discuss with you.”

 

She froze. “Oh?” She tried to subtly clear her throat. _Maybe I’m not as sneaky as I thought_. “What’s on your mind?”

 

“First of all, I want you to understand…I’m not saying this because I don’t trust you; I’m saying this as a concerned friend.”

 

“Got it.”

 

She nodded. “Just…don’t hurt Akihiko.”

 

It took Kirika a moment to process that comment. To remember not to feel offended by it. Like Mitsuru had stated, she was only speaking as a concerned friend. Nothing more. Hmm. Something still stung about it. The possibility of it being true. Becoming a reality. “Tch. Believe me, that is the last thing I wanna do,” she finally spoke up.

 

“Then I hope you know what you want.”

 

“I’m figuring it out. Slowly but surely.” She took a seat on her bed, bringing her knees to her chest. “With everything that has happened to that boy—all those things he never deserved—he doesn’t deserve to feel hurt ever again.”

 

“If that’s the case, then do you plan on staying?”

 

“Up until he tells me to leave, I guess.”

 

Mitsuru’s brow furrowed. “Why do you think he would tell you to leave?”

 

“Because I’m sure he’ll find someone better than me eventually. I mean, he does deserve better than me, after all.” She shrugged again. “So, when he does find that someone, I’ll take my leave.”

 

“You’re talking a lot about what he doesn’t deserve and what he does deserve.”

 

“Well…he’s a good guy. And, again, he’s been through a lot of shit that shouldn’t have happened to him. Bad karma that wasn’t fair to him.”

 

“Are you bad karma?”

 

“Maybe. Or maybe not. Either way, I’m sure there’s someone out there who he would be better off with. Someone better suited for him.”

 

“Perhaps you’re correct. There is always the possibility he could meet someone new at one point or another. Especially once he goes off to college.” She folded her arms across her chest, looking thoughtful. “Then again, he’ll never meet another girl who knew his best friend. Nor will he ever meet another girl who knew about the Dark Hour, or who explored Tartarus with him. He’ll never meet another girl with a Persona. He’ll never meet another girl who protected him with those powers. He’ll never meet another girl who will have, quite literally, faced death with him.” She paused. “All I’m saying is that, with everything we’ve gone through this past year…everything we’ve experienced…” She breathed deep. “Falling in love with someone during such vexing times—I believe—can only mean true love.”

 

She shook her head. “There’s no such thing.”

 

“Are you saying that because you truly believe it, or are you saying that because you’re afraid to admit it?”

 

She swallowed hard. “Good question.” She paused. “By the way, you fit the description of that girl, too.”

 

“Perhaps, but Akihiko and I don’t see each other that way.” She then smiled slyly. “Do I detect a hint of jealousy?”

 

“Tch. If I have anyone to be jealous of, I feel like it’d be you.”

 

She laughed a little. “Come now, there’s no need for that.” She took a deep breath, a small smile still on her face. “Either way, you will be staying, correct?” she then diverted them to their original conversation.

 

Kirika shrugged her shoulders. “Does it look like I’ve been trying to get away?”

 

“Hmm. I suppose not.”

 

“Exactly.”

 

“Then you should know Akihiko won’t tell you to go anywhere. Better yet, you should tell him how you feel before it’s too late.”

 

She nodded. “Nyx…”

 

“I do believe we have a chance of beating it, but that still doesn’t eliminate the chance of us being defeated.”

 

“I know.”

 

“Just like we know you’ll do your best to protect us for as long as you can.”

 

“Of course I will.”

 

“But Akihiko still _deserves_ to know how you feel.”

 

“Maybe I should wait till after we defeat Nyx to tell him.”

 

“Why would you take that risk?”

 

“Because he once told me I’m worth the risk…so now I’m deciding he’s worth this risk as well.”

 

“I’m aware I don’t have full context of that previous conversation, but I’m assuming he told you that under a very different circumstance.”

 

“True, but—”

 

“Don’t take a risk over something like this. Be smart about it.”

 

“Hmm…” She paused. “When you spoke with Aki last night after I left, did you talk to him about me?”

 

“I may have. And I think I’ve said it before, but I’ll say it again just in case: I do believe you and Akihiko are very good together. He’s brought out the best in you, too, which says a lot in itself.”

 

She couldn’t help but laugh at that comment. “I’ll admit, you do have a point there.” She took a deep breath. “That doesn’t change the comp—”

 

“Complications?” Now Mitsuru sighed. “I had a feeling you were going to say that. So, let me add that the only reason things are still so complicated for you is because you’re keeping them that way.”

 

Kirika released her knees, stretching out. “That is what I do best.”

 

“Well, you seem to have changed almost everything about yourself. So maybe it’s time to change that aspect as well.”

 

“I’ve changed everything? Tch. No wonder I no longer feel like myself.”

 

“Is that good or bad?”

 

“A little bit of both.” She paused. “I’ve learned, though, that sometimes you need to lose yourself just so you can find yourself.”

 

“Those are wise words to follow. I can relate, as well. That’s close to how I felt after my father died.”

 

“I think that’s what I’ve been doing all these years, y’know? I would always tell people I was traveling, but in all actuality, I was running. I was running away from myself, while running to myself at the same time. If that makes any sense.”

 

“It does.”

 

She nodded. “Never did I think I’d find myself in the same place I lost myself. Although, I guess that would make the most sense.”

 

“Honestly, I’m not sure if it matters when or where. All that matters is that you do find yourself, and that you learn from the experience.”

 

“True enough.” She chuckled, shaking her head. “I think this talk may have gone a bit off track.”

 

“It seems most things have gone a bit off track for us all. But since we’ve stuck together, we’ve been able to get through it all.”

 

“Yeah… By the way, I’m sorry for taking off when I did. Last month for those couple of weeks, I mean. It wasn’t very fair of me to do that.”

 

“You didn’t take off, though. You just took a short break, and there’s nothing wrong with that. Everyone needs a break now and then.”

 

“Feels like there’s been too much going on to take a break.”

 

“I understand, but it’s good to keep your mind off things. To keep your mind busy. To be thinking constantly about something—especially something as drastic as the end of the world—could drive you to insanity.”

 

“So, what are you suggesting?”

 

“I’m suggesting you do something to keep yourself occupied. Especially for when we go back to school.”

 

“Sounds like you’re asking me to make plans.” She shook her head. “I don’t make plans. I just improvise. I go with the flow. After all, life isn’t something you can plan. These last few months have proven that.”

 

“I suppose you’re right.”

 

Kirika got back to her feet. “Thank you.”

 

“For?”

 

“This talk. I mean, most of what I said only came to me because of what you were saying. And that may sound stupid, but—”

 

“It doesn’t sound stupid.” She paused, tilting her head slightly. “Why do you always feel the need to degrade yourself?” Once again, Kirika only shrugged in response. Mitsuru let out another heavy sigh. “Well, you’re welcome anyhow.”

 

She laughed. “You and I have come a long way. I mean, you didn’t like me when I first joined and now—”

 

“That’s not true.”

 

“C’mon, you can’t lie to me. You were not fond of me at first.”

 

She rolled her eyes. “All right, fine, maybe I wasn’t.”

 

She continued laughing. “Yeah, that’s what I thought. I don’t blame you for that, though. I don’t like myself a lot of the time, either. Guess that’s another aspect of myself I can try to change.”

 

“You know, I’ve decided I don’t like that term when you’re talking about yourself.”

 

“Uhm…you used it first.”

 

“I understand that, but your reaction made me realise how dishonest it sounds.”

 

“Dishonest?”

 

“Yes. For instance, when you speak about changing aspects of yourself like that, it sounds like you’re turning yourself into someone you’re not. Even if it is good.”

 

“How am I supposed to put it, then?”

 

Mitsuru thought for a moment. “To simply put it, you’re just working on yourself. You’re bettering yourself.”

 

“But that almost makes it sound like I’m not good enough.”

 

“Huh.” Now she paused. “It does, doesn’t it?”

 

Kirika laughed at this and it wasn’t long before Mitsuru joined her. “Don’t worry, I get what you were trying to say,” Kirika then went on. “So, thanks again.”

 

“Stop thanking me.”

 

“I will stop thanking you so long as you never apologise to me again.”

 

“Ah, yes, that’s right. Akihiko actually has mentioned before how you’re not very fond of apologies.” She grinned. “He knows you quite well.”

 

“He does, huh?” She pursed her lips, nodding. “Kinda sucks.”

 

Mitsuru chuckled a bit more. “Is that why you hate him?”

 

Now she was holding back a blush. “That is exactly why.”

 

“Well, I think it’s about time you tell him the opposite.” And she turned to leave.

 

She paused, thinking. “For the record,” she spoke up, halting Mitsuru, “I don’t think hate is the opposite of love.”

 

“Is that so?” She folded her arms across her chest. “Then what is?”

 

More thinking. “Love is a strong emotion, as is hate. Except hate, of course, has a negative connotation. So, the opposite of love would be—”

 

“A weak emotion?”

 

“Not in a literal sense, no.” Another pause. “Indifference. Not feeling any sort of emotion at all. But,” she grinned, “that’s a whole other conversation.”

 

Mitsuru returned the smile once more. “Let’s save it for another day, then. Perhaps after we defeat Nyx.”

 

Kirika nodded her head, still smiling. “Sounds like a plan.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sentimental Kirika/Mitsuru moment, for the win lmao x3


	102. January 8th, 2010

When the others headed to school that morning, Kirika made her way to the mall. She stopped at the café and had a couple cups of coffee before returning to Port Island Station. She decided to drop by the movie theatre and sit through a couple films. By the time she got out, she realised it was around the time classes would be ending. So, she made her way for Gekkoukan High. And she made it in record time, too, walking up to the gates as soon as Akihiko was walking out.

 

“Yo,” he said with a smile.

 

She smiled in returned. “Hey, there. How was the first day back?”

 

“So far everything is ordinary. I mean, this term seems like any other term. Everyone at school thinks this is just a normal third term, too. They have no clue that this may be the last third term ever.” He took a deep breath. “It’s weird being the only ones who know about this, isn’t it?”

 

“Well, it definitely makes it feel like more of a burden. It’s a burden we chose to carry, though.”

 

He nodded. “I don’t care about what’s going to happen to the world. All I’m going to do is keep moving forward. And I hope you’ll do the same.”

 

“I’m gonna try. Can’t say it’ll be easy, though.”

 

“Then you’re thinking too much about it.”

 

“Yeah, I seem to overthink things better than I do anything else.”

 

“Maybe you should try to break that habit.”

 

“I dunno, could come in handy at some point in the future. I mean, I feel like I need to be able to overthink and overanalyse things if I wanna investigate and whatnot.”

 

He cocked an eyebrow with a curious grin. “Yeah? Is that what you wanna do? Be an investigator?”

 

“Maybe. Or a detective or cop or something in that field.”

 

“What made you come to that decision?”

 

She shrugged. “I dunno. Guess just I realised how I’m always curious about looking into stories, and I’m always coming up with theories, and investigating them and all that.” She chuckled a bit. “Y’know, I think Shinji hated that most about me. Always said one of my theories was gonna get me killed someday.”

 

“Sounds like him.” He paused. “Still, it’s good that you know what you wanna do with your life.”

 

“You say that like I’m actually gonna be able to go somewhere with it.”

 

“Well, why wouldn’t you be able to?”

 

“Not like I’d be able to get into any sort of college or university or…whatever. I mean, I don’t have any sort of education to back me up.”

 

“I’m sure you could figure something out. Maybe Kurosawa-san could give you a push in the right direction.”

 

“I don’t want any help. I’d rather figure it out on my own.”

 

“You can’t do that for everything, Kiri. Besides, there’s no shame in asking for help.”

 

Another shrug of the shoulders. “Don’t worry about me. I’ve made it this far on my own, after all.”

 

“No offence, but I don’t think these last few months count as being on your own.”

 

“Shut up, you know what I mean.”

 

With that, they fell silent. They continued their way to Port Island Station, boarding the tram once it finally arrived.

 

“Hey, what did Mitsuru talk to you about yesterday?” Akihiko spoke up.

 

“Hmm?” Kirika said.

 

“Mitsuru went to your room yesterday morning, and it seemed like she was in there for a good while.”

 

“So?”

 

“So…what were you two talking about?”

 

She couldn’t help the grin creeping across her lips. “What does it matter?”

 

“I guess it doesn’t, but I’m just wondering.”

 

“Does it make you nervous?”

 

“Not unless I have a reason to be nervous.”

 

“You don’t, but I just don’t understand why you care so much. Besides, it was a private conversation.”

 

“C’mon, like you didn’t do the same thing by asking her what she had spoken about with me the night before.”

 

She paused. “I didn’t.”

 

He chuckled. “I like to think I know you better than that.”

 

“Please, you don’t know the first thing about me.”

 

“That sounds like a challenge if I ever heard one.”

 

“C’mon, how could you know me when I don’t even know myself?”

 

“Then I definitely take that as a challenge.”

 

“The hell are you talking about, Aki?”

 

“I’m gonna prove I know you better than you know yourself.”

 

Now she laughed. She was partly amused and partly taken aback by his sudden dubious behaviour. “Oh really?”

 

“Yeah, I am.”

 

When she met his gaze, she realised exactly what this meant to him. This wasn’t actually a challenge to him; it wasn’t gonna be just some silly game. Hell, he was serious about this. The look in his eyes was intense. For whatever reason, he was determined to prove a point to her. And for a split second, she felt as if she was almost…frightened. No, that wasn’t the right word.

 

She was intimidated.

 

“Don’t get so worked up over something so trivial,” she said.

 

“Nothing is trivial when it comes to you.”

 

“Aki, it ain’t even a real challenge. Seriously, don’t get so hotheaded.”

 

“My determination is just another way I know you better than you know yourself. That’ll be explained soon enough, though.”

 

“What? You mean you’re gonna prepare yourself for this?”

 

“Of course. I gotta train for everything.”

 

“Yeah? Gotta take your nasty protein shots?”

 

That broke through his intensity and he laughed. “Shut up.”

 

“Just be careful. When you get this determined, you get this sort of…forceful look in your eyes and it gets Persephone a bit worked up and anxious.”

 

“I’m sorry, I don’t mean—”

 

“I know. I’m just giving you a fair warning.”

 

“Does she feel endanger—?”

 

“No! No, she doesn’t think you’re dangerous in the slightest,” she said before he could even finish asking. Tch. It was the complete opposite when it came to Akihiko. Kirika had figured that out months ago, but it took her even longer to come to terms with it. To admit it. Yet, at the same time… “But that doesn’t change the fact that that intensity of yours can make her uneasy at times.”

 

“I see…”

 

She gave him a quick peck on the cheek as the tram came to its stop. That brought a small smile back to his sullied face.

 

“Race you back to the dorm,” she then said.

 

His smile turned into a smirk. “You’re on.”

 

With that, they booked it off the tram and ran for the dorms. Kirika had managed to get off the tram first, giving herself a little bit of a head start. Akihiko, of course, was in much better shape, though, so it didn’t take long before he was able to advance her. In the end, he reached the dorm steps before she did. On top of that, he seemed to have barely broken a sweat, while she practically collapsed on the sidewalk.

 

“Y’know, you should really be in better shape, considering,” he said. “That’s twice I’ve beat you now.”

 

“Sorry I don’t train as constantly as you do.”

 

“Maybe you should.”

 

“Why? It’s not like I’m fighting.”

 

“Yeah, but you still shouldn’t be—”

 

“Hey, it’s not like it was a light jog. Okay. That was frigging sprint, so I think I have every reason to be like this.”

 

He shook his head at her. “Either way, I got here first. So, what have I won?”

 

She took another moment to catch her breath as that comment sunk in. “Excuse me? The hell are you talking about?”

 

“I think I should receive an award of some sort.”

 

“That so?” She nodded her head as she pushed herself back to her feet. She then stepped up to Akihiko, leaning in to kiss him. She leaned until their lips barely brushed together, and then she grinned and pushed him away. “Nice try, but we didn’t agree on anything, so you ain’t getting shit.”

 

He pursed his lips, but he was chucking. “Fine. I’ll think of something anyway.”

 

“And I’ll ignore the request once you think of it.”

 

He laughed some more before grabbing her hand and pulling her into him, wrapping his arms around her waist. “Start training with me.”

 

“Haven’t we talked about this already?”

 

“Yeah, and I still think it would be a good idea.”

 

She sighed. “Since I know you’ll make me think about it anyway, I’ll at least consider it,” she told him. “Don’t get your hopes up, though.”

 

“Fine. Good enough.”

 

With that, they entered the dorm. Rather than stay separate from the others, though, they both took a seat in the lounge and started doing their own thing in the company of the rest of the group. All of a sudden, though, Kirika was having a hard time focusing. She was no longer moving, but her mind was still racing. For some odd and unknown reason, Persephone was getting to a point where she was no longer sure whether she still felt comfortable or not. Hmm.

 

An elongated state of apprehension that Kirika couldn’t control.


	103. January 10th, 2010

For the next couple of days, Kirika made it routine to meet up with Akihiko at the school gates once classes got out. Then they would walk back to the dorm together. And once they got to Iwatodai Station, they would debate stopping at the strip mall for a meal, yet always somehow decide against it.

 

That particular afternoon, they were both unusually quiet. One of them was always able to carry out a conversation, but something was different about today. Worse yet, Kirika couldn’t figure out if she felt on edge because of Persephone, or if Persephone felt on edge because of her. It was almost like a never-ending cycle.

 

“Anything new going on with you at all?” Akihiko finally spoke up as they were nearing the dorm.

 

“Aki, you literally see me every single day. So, if there was anything new going on, you would know by now.”

 

“Sometimes it just feels like I miss a lot. I mean, you’re still so reserved…”

 

She shrugged her shoulders. “Just what I’m used to.”

 

“Yeah, that’s what you always say.”

 

“Tch. Are you okay? Because something seems to be on your mind.”

 

“No, I’m fine.”

 

“C’mon, that’s my line. Don’t tell me I’m rubbing off on you.”

 

He chuckled a bit, but it didn’t sound normal. Not for him, at least. Then he took a deep breath. “I should probably go study.”

 

“Study? You just started school again the other day. How can you already have midterms coming up?”

 

“Not midterms…”

 

“Then what?”

 

He swallowed hard. “The national admissions test.”

 

Her eyes widened a bit. “Oh.” She sat down on one of the front steps of the dorm, landing a little harder than she had anticipated. “Wow.”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“Uhm…go study, then.”

 

“Aren’t you coming in?”

 

“Y-yeah, just, uh…” She cleared her throat. “Just give me a few minutes.”

 

“It’s cold out here, though.”

 

“Go study.”

 

He sighed, but gave up on arguing with her. So, Akihiko headed into the dorm, but not without first removing his jacket and draping it around Kirika’s shoulders. She smiled softly at the gesture and closed her eyes as she was left alone on the front steps. But then it wasn’t long before Minato showed up. He stopped before her.

 

“You can go on in, Arisato,” she said.

 

He took a seat beside her. “I can also wait.”

 

“Hmm.” She paused, thinking. “You’ve spent a lot of your life going from place to place, right?” He only nodded in response. “You’ve probably always adapted better than I have, too,” she went on. “I mean, I know I say it’s easy for me to adapt, but it’s really not. That’s part of the reason why I would only ever stay in a place for two months at a time. It wasn’t enough time to grow attached to anyone, and it was barely enough time to adapt to the area…if that makes any sense. Tch. It probably doesn’t.” Another pause. “I’m sure this’ll sound foolish, but I’ve always hated the idea of settling down. Now I’ve been in this damn city for nine frigging months, though, and I’ve adapted to living here in the dorm with you and with Aki and with everyone else, and—And, no offence, but it kinda sucks. I mean, I’ve always been the one to take off, yet now I feel as if I’m somehow gonna be the one left behind. Not that I want to be the one leaving any of you behind…” She sighed, shaking her head. “I’m just not used to any of this. I ain’t used to being a part of something bigger than myself, or being with people who genuinely care about what happens to me. I’m used to being on my own and to looking out for no one but me. My life has made a complete 180, though, and I still don’t know how to feel about it. Persephone’s almost always at a loss, too. Some days, she’s all for remaining here, but other days she wants nothing more than to take off again. To run. I don’t know which is worse, either. I mean, I’ve spent my entire life living by some stupid rule I made up when I was eleven. A rule my so-called parents engrained in me. Don’t get attached because it ain’t worth it.” Now she rolled her eyes. “Hell, what does an eleven-year-old even know about attachment? I’ll tell you what. Nothing. They don’t know shit because they’re only _eleven_. I mean, who the hell is an eleven-year-old supposed to be attached to?”

 

He shrugged his shoulders. “Family.”

 

“Well, my parents didn’t like me, let alone each other.” She hugged her knees. “We were far from being a family. We were strangers living under the same roof. Tch. Rather than showing me love and affection, they just—” She took a deep breath. “They taught me not to trust anyone. Not to rely on anyone. That the whole world would always be working against me, no matter what. That there was no such thing as kindness because there would always be some hidden motive. And I learned all that just by watching them, too. Not like they ever spoke to me, anyhow. Not unless they needed my help with some stupid con. Otherwise, I was nothing more than the _nuisance_. So, of course, I wouldn’t have grown attached to my parents. After all, they showed no attachment to me, either. Doesn’t help that I’m basically the reason they’re dead…” She paused, tilting her head in quiet revelation. “Huh. So maybe that’s where I went wrong.”

 

Now he raised an eyebrow at her. “Maybe?”

 

“Oh, shut up.” Another pause. “All right. Let’s say that is exactly where I went wrong, then. Technically, it wasn’t my fault. My Persona screwed me over.”

 

“Not sure if that’s what Arisato-san was referring to, Senpai,” Ken said as he came down the steps with Koromaru.

 

“Hey, how much of that did you hear, kiddo?”

 

“Enough to think that wasn’t what he was referring to.”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“About your parents’ death being where you went wrong.”

 

She thought for a moment before swallowing hard. “Learning from my parents. That’s where I went wrong.” She rolled her eyes at the newfound realisation. “Ugh. I’ve spent my entire life living by the guidelines of two con artists who didn’t give two shits about me. I really am a moron.” She let out a heavy sigh, patting Koromaru on the head. “Would it still be totally crazy for me to take off for a few days to see if I can get a new perspective on things? Because maybe that’s what I need. Maybe I’ve been stuck in this city for too long now and it’s clouding my thought process.”

 

Minato nodded. “It would be.”

 

“Especially with the end closing in so quickly,” Ken went on. “I mean, I can understand where you’re coming from, Senpai, with the idea of it helping you clear your head and whatnot. I just don’t think it would be very fair to the rest of us.”

 

Koromaru then barked. Kirika smiled at him, scratching him behind his ears. “You agree, don’t you, Koro-chan?” she said. “Perhaps you’re right, then.”

 

“Have you spoken with Sanada-san about this?”

 

“Doubtful,” Minato said.

 

She glared at him. “I can’t believe this is the second time in a single conversation I will be telling you to shut up.”

 

Ken laughed a bit. “Well, I’m gonna take Koro-chan for a walk. Would either of you like to join me?”

 

Minato pushed him to his feet. “Sure.”

 

“Thanks, but I think I’ll pass,” Kirika said. “I’ve grown a bit too cold by this point to go for another walk.”

 

With that, Minato, Ken, and Koromaru left for their walk. Kirika then pulled Akihiko’s jacket a little tighter around her before finally entering the dorm. The girls were all seated around the lounge.

 

“Hi,” Fuuka greeted her. “How are you?”

 

She smiled. “Hey. I’m fine, thanks.”

 

“Akihiko-senpai is upstairs if you’re looking for him,” Yukari said.

 

“No, I know. We walked home together. I’ve just been sitting on the front steps. But he’s studying for the admissions test or whatever it is.”

 

“That’s right, I almost forgot that was coming up,” Mitsuru said. “It’s less than a week from now, so I should study for it, as well.”

 

“Does that mean we will not be attending Tartarus tonight?” Aigis asked.

 

“Hmm. Perhaps we should skip Tartarus tonight, after all.”

 

“Fine with me,” Kirika said after she hung up the jacket and took a seat in one of the armchairs. “I don’t know why, but I’ve been overly exhausted lately.”

 

“Well, I still won’t give a definite answer. Yamagishi, just ask Akihiko and myself later tonight and we’ll go from there.”

 

“Okay, Mitsuru-san,” Fuuka said.

 

With that, Mitsuru headed up to her room to study. Kirika picked up the book Mitsuru had put down and started reading. She soon stopped, though, when she felt all eyes on her. She looked up and around at the other three.

 

“Yes?” she spoke up.

 

“Are you okay, Senpai?” Yukari said.

 

“I’m great.” Her eyes fell back to the book. “Forget I said anything.”

 

“You do not seem great,” Aigis went on.

 

Now she sighed. “On second thought, I think I’m gonna turn in early. Can’t say I’m really in the mood to be interrogated anyway.”

 

So, she put the book down and headed up to her own bedroom. She hadn’t actually been planning on going to bed early, but as soon as she closed her door, exhaustion overcame her. It was almost as if her body felt limp. Maybe it was from the cold, or maybe it was from everything going on in general, but Persephone was feeling pretty out of it, too. So, Kirika collapsed onto her bed, and it wasn’t long before her mind was filled with empty dreams.


	104. January 12th, 2010

The group had the previous day off and, for whatever reason, Kirika had found herself feeling a bit uncomfortable hanging around them at the dorm. It was like when she had first joined the group all over again. So, she decided to spend some extra time away from the others, figuring it may put her in the right mindset to help her figure out exactly what was going on.

 

That approach continued into the following day. It was around quarter past five that day when Akihiko showed up at Paulownia Mall. She had just finished packing up her mini reading station.

 

“Hey, stranger,” she greeted him.

 

“Yo. Some of us are meeting at Hagakure for dinner,” he told her.

 

“You can go ahead without me.”

 

He shook his head. “No. I didn’t come all this way just to go back without you.”

 

She let out a soft sigh. “Fine.” She really wasn’t in the mood to argue.

 

“It feels like you’ve been trying to avoid us lately,” he then said.

 

“You all feel that way?”

 

“Sort of, yeah.”

 

“Sort of?”

 

Now he sighed. “C’mon, is everything okay with you, Kiri? You have me a little worried. Ken mentioned something about—”

 

She rolled her eyes. “Ugh, that bastard…”

 

“Kirika.”

 

“What?”

 

“You told both me and Mitsuru that you would be sticking around. Yet, you still asked Arisato and Amada the other day if it would be crazy for you to take off right now? So…I don’t get. Were you lying?”

 

“No, I wasn’t—” She let out a heavy sigh. “I only meant for a few days. Not permanently, which I guess was a point the bastard kid conveniently left out.”

 

“Why, though?”

 

“To help me get a clear view on things.”

 

He took her hand in his. “Let me help you with that.”

 

Damn it. She knew he was trying to be sweet. Sentimental. Considerate. She knew he was only trying to better understand the situation and her point of view. She knew he wanted to help, but— “No offence,” she pulled her hand away, “but it ain’t the same.”

 

“Tch.”

 

They remained silent for the rest of the walk. And when they arrived at Hagakure, Yukari and Aigis were just showing up as well. The four of them exchanged quick greetings and headed inside the restaurant. Not long after, Minato and Junpei showed up.

 

“Is the special okay for everyone?” Yukari said once they were all seated.

 

“Sounds good to me,” Minato said.

 

“Okay. Six specials, please.”

 

Junpei smiled almost giddily. “Man, this is awesome. Akihiko-san’s never treated us all to ramen before.”

 

Akihiko furrowed his brow. “Hey, why do I have to treat everyone?”

 

“Tch. Not this again… Come on, Akihiko-san, a bet’s a bet. Pay up.”

 

“All right, all right. I never said I wouldn’t.”

 

“And what bet would this be?” Kirika spoke up.

 

Akihiko’s face reddened at the question, but Junpei’s grin only widened.

 

“A bet from way back in July,” Junpei said. “We went away to Mitsuru-senpai’s summer home on Yakushima and us three guys made a bet to see which one of us could pick up the most babes.”

 

She pursed her lips as a smile began creeping across her own lips. “And you lost?”

 

Akihiko was looking away now. “It was a stupid bet. I didn’t even want any part of it, but they forced me to play along.”

 

“But the point is, you lost? And to Iori?”

 

That wiped the grin off Junpei’s face. “Hey!”

 

“What a stud,” she went on, ignoring Junpei’s reaction.

 

Akihiko was still hiding his face. “Please shut up.”

 

She leaned closer to him, lowering her voice so only he could hear her. “Is that why you picked up the tabloid with that stupid article?” He glared at her from behind his hands, but the look only caused her to laugh. “Okay, I’ll stop.”

 

He then picked up a nearby magazine. He and Aigis observed it together.

 

“This article looks quite disturbing,” Aigis said. “ _Emergence of a Messiah: The Charismatic One Speaks_.”

 

Yukari rolled her eyes. “It must be about that doomsday cult. They’re all over the Internet, too.”

 

Akihiko turned the page and his eyes widened. “Wh-what the—?”

 

“There’s a picture of their leader,” Aigis said.

 

Everyone else now crowded around to get a look at the article for themselves.

 

“Hey…that’s—” Yukari said.

 

“I-is that Takaya?” Junpei went on.

 

“I thought something was up.” Akihiko shook his head. “So, Strega’s behind that damn cult.”

 

Kirika sat back with a huff. “Go figure.”

 

“Tch. I’ve lost my appetite.”

 

“Listen to what he says,” Aigis prompted. “ _Mankind is currently imprisoned by the sins of hate and anger. But soon a savior will descend upon this world to break the chains that bind us and lift us to new heights. This great being is Nyx. I have beheld her glory, and she has blessed me with power beyond belief. In Nyx there is no pain…no suffering_ …”

 

Now Kirika rolled her eyes. “What a load of bullshit.”

 

“How the hell does he know about Nyx?” Junpei asked.

 

“Wait, he’s saying that Nyx will save the world?” Yukari went on. “That’s not true.”

 

“I don’t think he really means what he’s saying,” Akihiko said. “This is all just a game to him.”

 

“That son of a bitch…” Junpei said.

 

“ _But there are those who do not understand this truth, even though they have also been blessed by her_ ,” Aigis continued. “ _They have acquired the same power as I; yet they abuse it, using it for their own personal gain. These miscreants are the ones to blame for the recent tragedies that have been plaguing our streets_.”

 

Now Junpei’s eyes widened. “Wait, is he talking about us?”

 

Yukari shushed him. “Not so loud.”

 

“Oh, sorry…” He paused, thinking. “Hey, what’s up with them calling him the _charismatic one_? How’d he get so popular all of a sudden?”

 

“Well, Jin’s pretty well-known on the Internet,” Akihiko said. “He’s probably pretty good at stirring up trouble.”

 

“Yeah, I bet he orchestrated Takaya’s rise to fame,” Yukari said. “Ugh, those two make me sick.”

 

“ _Brothers and sisters, I shall go forth to make preparations for Nyx’s arrival_ ,” Aigis still went on. “ _But do not fear those evildoers who desecrate their gifts. Nyx shall right their wrongs. May your hearts be filled with peace as you await your salvation. Blessed are those who take joy in the coming of Nyx. The revolution is here_.”

 

“Salvation?” Kirika said. “Tch…”

 

“Revolution?” Junpei said. “People can’t seriously be buying this crap, can they?”

 

“ _Throughout history, those who have changed the future have often been highly charismatic_ ,” Aigis said. “That’s the end of the article. It appears that after the interview, Jin and Takaya disappeared again.”

 

“Well, there’s only one place they could’ve gone,” Akihiko said. “Tartarus.” He sighed. “They must’ve been planning this all along.”

 

“Takaya’s words have changed the mood of the entire city. Even though they won’t admit it, they are all afraid.”

 

“Yeah…I mean, why else would people believe this nonsense Takaya’s preaching?” Yukari said.

 

Akihiko shrugged his shoulders. “I guess people just need something to believe in.”

 

Kirika scoffed. “They need something better than this bullshit.”

 

“Well, no wonder there’s a sense of doom in the air,” Junpei went on. “We’re all gonna die.”

 

“But is that so surprising?” Aigis asked. “The fact that all life ends one day has nothing to do with Nyx. Death is a natural occurrence in the cycle of life. Don’t all humans realise this?”

 

“I guess…” Yukari said.

 

“To tell you the truth,” Junpei started, “I never would’ve thought about my own death if none of this had happened. But since we’ve made up our minds, why don’t we just leave it at that? Our objective is Nyx. If Strega gets in our way, we’ll just have to deal with them, too.”

 

Akihiko nodded his head once. “I agree. We’ll probably run into them at Tartarus anyways… However you look at it, we’re the obstacle standing in their way.”

 

“The promised day will soon be here,” Yukari said.

 

“Yeah…” Junpei said.

 

“We need to do all we can until then,” Akihiko went on.

 

“And if it’s not enough?” Kirika said.

 

“It will be.”

 

“Yeah,” Junpei repeated. “And we’re gonna need lots of energy. So, let’s eat.” He turned his attention to the chef. “Excuse me. I’d like to order a Hagakure Bowl.” He looked back at Akihiko. “You don’t mind, do you, Akihiko-san?”

 

“Junpei, don’t forget you’re having half of Aigis’ food, too,” Yukari said.

 

“Oh, don’t worry. I’m starving.”

 

“You just better eat it all,” Akihiko said.

 

Once everyone finished their meals, they headed back to the dorm together. When they arrived, Kirika headed straight for stairs, climbing each and every step until she made it to the rooftop. And Akihiko was sure to follow her every step of the way. They stood by the ledge but remained silent for a few minutes.

 

A long few minutes.

 

“Kinda ironic,” Kirika soon spoke up, her gaze turned towards the rising moon. “We get an extra hour in the day, yet it somehow feels like we’re losing time so much more quickly than everyone else. Hmm…” She paused. “Maybe it’s the unwillingness of being aware of the Dark Hour that ruins it.”

 

“Unwillingness?” Akihiko said.

 

“Yeah. Maybe that’s not the right word for it, but—”

 

“I think you mean the fact that we didn’t have a choice in the first place.”

 

“Exactly. So that makes it more of a burden than anything else.”

 

“I guess…” He thought for a moment. “Even if I wasn’t in SEES,” he then began, “I still wouldn’t join a cult. I mean, I assert my individuality through boxing, so there’s no room for the cult to come into my life.”

 

Kirika cocked her head at the subject change. She felt the new topic was strange, but she was sure he had a point to it. “Honestly, I don’t know where I’d be if it wasn’t for SEES,” she said. “And that’s assuming I would’ve stuck around just for the hell of it.”

 

He swallowed hard. “What if Strega had found you first?”

 

“In a way, they kinda did.”

 

“C’mon, you know what I mean.”

 

She paused. “Would I have joined Strega if they had approached me first?”

 

He shrugged his shoulders. “Reasonable question, I think.”

 

She sighed. And there was his point. “I already said…I honestly don’t know,” she started. “I probably wouldn’t even be here still if I hadn’t gotten involved with all this bullshit. I would’ve stuck with my two-month rule, and I would’ve been gone by the beginning of June. Tch. That would’ve eliminated so many of my accidents, too.” She shook her head. “Sometimes I think I’m crazy for breaking all my rules.”

 

“And how do you feel when you don’t think you’re crazy for having done so?”

 

“Hmm. When I don’t think I’m crazy for breaking them, I think I’m stupid for breaking them.”

 

“Ah…”

 

“What?”

 

“Nothing. I’m sorry I asked.”

 

“What were you expecting me to say, Aki?”

 

“I don’t know.” He let out an exasperated sigh. “Maybe just that you don’t regret staying here.”

 

“I never said anything about regret. So, please, don’t put words in my mouth.”

 

“Tch. I’m gonna go try to study some more and get my mind off Strega and this stupid cult.” He walked away, but quickly stopped himself. He then stepped back up to Kirika and placed his hand over hers where it rested on the ledge. “I didn’t mean—”

 

“Stop,” she said. “I know.”

 

He gently squeezed her hand. “I just like knowing what’s on your mind.”

 

“Yeah, well, just because you’re under the impression I’m thinking a certain way, doesn’t mean I’m actually thinking that way.”

 

“No, I—I know…”

 

“You can be real inconsiderate sometimes.”

 

“Yeah, you called me that at the hospital after you had been shot.”

 

She shook her head at him. “Why do you remember that?”

 

“Because you were right.”

 

She then swallowed hard. “Go study. I’ll be fine.”

 

He took a deep breath, nodding. “Try to get some rest.” He kissed her forehead and made his way back inside. The loss of his warm hand made her shiver.

 

Kirika remained on the rooftop until the air froze her thoughts. She then retired to her bedroom for the night. She was the least bit tired, though. Obviously. Every night before she had been exhausted, but now sleep was the last thing on her mind. It was a vicious cycle.

 

She collapsed onto her bed and gazed at the ceiling. She thought more about Akihiko’s question. The one she had technically asked herself. _Would I have joined Strega if they had approached me first_? She wouldn’t have. Persephone wouldn’t have let her because she wouldn’t have felt safe around them. Then again, maybe that would’ve been the perfect strategy to stay safe. Even so, it wouldn’t have lasted long. So, no, she wouldn’t have joined Strega. And no, she didn’t have any regrets about staying…

 

And why was she laying there telling herself all this? Hell, she already knew all this. So, she should’ve been on her feet and on her way down to Akihiko’s room to tell him all this. She wasn’t, though. Instead, she stayed put. After all, she didn’t want to bother him during his studies.

 

She let out a heavy sigh. Her life wasn’t where she had imagined it would be, but if this was where her life was truly going to end, she couldn’t say she had any complaints. And that right there was more than enough to calm her down.


	105. January 15th, 2010

Kirika did a lot of thinking over the course of the next few days. She thought about the past, the present, and the future. She thought about what had been, what could have been, and what could still be. She played through every single possible scenario in her mind of what would happen if she left versus what would happen if she stuck around for good. There were good and bad endings for both choices. There was still no final decision, though. All that time and all that thinking, and she felt as if she had gotten nowhere. So that made her feel even more that she really did need to get out of the city. But she was so sick of having the same argument with herself. With Persephone. Both of them switching sides every single time.

 

It was around eight o’clock one evening when there was a knock on her door. Before she could respond, though, Akihiko let himself in. And he made sure to close the door behind him, which let Kirika know he most likely already had an entire conversation planned out in his head.

 

“Don’t your exams start tomorrow?” she soon spoke up when he didn’t. “Shouldn’t you be participating in some last-minute studying? Or better yet, shouldn’t you be sleeping?”

 

“No, I should be here talking with you,” he said.

 

She stopped what she was doing and looked over at him. “What’s on your mind?”

 

He straightened himself up a bit. “Studying for the national admissions test has made me think about my future,” he began. “Even more so than I already have been. So, I’ll say this again… We are still moving towards the future, and we won’t let Nyx stand in our way.”

 

She nodded. “Okay.”

 

“Okay?”

 

Now she shrugged her shoulders. “Okay.”

 

He shifted his body weight from foot to foot. “I am going to have a future, which means you are going to have a future as well.”

 

“Just remember what I told you, Aki.”

 

“Don’t plan a future with someone like you?”

 

“Exactly.”

 

“Well, would you plan a future with someone like me?”

 

“Of course I would.” She paused. “But I won’t.”

 

“Why not?”

 

“Because, Aki,” she pushed herself away from the desk with a small sigh, “you’re about to take your college admission exams. And that means you’ll be going off to a university soon. Y’know…bigger and better things.” She shrugged. “So that means you’ll also find someone better than me.”

 

His brows furrowed. “E-excuse me?”

 

“You’ll meet someone new who actually deserves to be with you, and—”

 

“Shut up.”

 

Kirika instantly pursed her lips and turned her gaze downward. She could feel Akihiko’s gaze burning right through her. Intense as it always was when he was upset with her. This time was different, though. This time she knew he was more than just upset.

 

He was hurt.

 

“What makes you think you’re so replaceable?” he broke the tense silence. “Why do you always sell yourself short? Why don’t you ever believe you’re good enough?”

 

“It’s complicated.”

 

Now he rolled his eyes. “Go figure.”

 

“Tch. It’s not that I don’t think I’m good enough; I just ain’t good enough for you.”

 

“How is that any different?”

 

“I dunno… It made more sense in my head.”

 

He let out an exasperated sigh. “Don’t be so ridiculous, Kiri.”

 

“What? So, you really think you can’t do any better than me?”

 

“No, it’s not that, I just—Damn it. I don’t want to do any better than you. I mean, even if there is someone better than you out there, I don’t—I don’t care. There’s still no one better for me _than_ you.” He paused. “S-some of that came out wrong, but I’m hoping you get my point.”

 

She chuckled sheepishly. “Yeah, I get it. To an extent, at least.”

 

“And what’s that supposed to mean?”

 

“Well…I understand the point you were trying to get across, but I don’t understand why you would choose me.”

 

“I could ask you the same thing,” he said. “Why me?”

 

“I thought you knew me better—”

 

“Stop. Now’s not the time for that. Just…why did you choose me?”

 

“I think Persephone chose you more than I did.”

 

“Either way, that doesn’t answer my question.”

 

“Please, if you think I know the answer, then you’re crazy.”

 

He let out an exasperated chuckle. “Didn’t I just tell you not to be so ridiculous?”

 

A small smile spread across her lips. “But in all seriousness, Aki, I honestly have no idea what set you aside from everyone else,” she then started, removing herself from the desk chair to reseat herself on the bed. “I don’t know why Persephone chose to grow attached to you. But I do know Shinji once said that maybe our Personas are our gut instincts. And I thought that made sense, so I went with it.”

 

“That actually would make sense.” He stepped up to the bed and hesitated before sitting beside her. “What prompted him to say that, though?”

 

“He had asked me once how Persephone felt about you.”

 

“I see.”

 

“Yeah. It was a sort of odd conversation. One that has stayed pretty fresh in my mind. I think it was basically the first time he had ever shown vague interest in a personal matter of my life. Probably only because that matter involved you, though.”

 

“I bet Shinji cared about you more than he may have led on.”

 

She nodded. “Either way…”

 

Akihiko took her hands in his own. “Please, stop thinking I’m settling for you.” Kirika’s breath caught in her throat. She wasn’t sure if that comment should’ve made her feel happy or guilty or relieved or— “Just know that I-I don’t regret any of the choices I’ve made,” he went on. “Especially the ones that have involved you.”

 

Now she swallowed hard. “I’m sorry,” she said. “Tch. You’ve made me grow accustomed to saying that damn phrase all the time.”

 

“Then stop apologising for everything. You don’t have to apologise for anything.”

 

“You sure about that? I do a lot of things wrong, and I’m always screwing up.”

 

“Stop.” He brushed her hair behind her ear. “I’ve had my fair share of screw ups, too.” He kissed her hands. “Maybe we’ll be able to make up for them in the future.”

 

“Aki—”

 

“I know. Don’t plan a future with you.”

 

“Keep that in mind. It’ll do you good.”

 

“Too bad I’m gonna change your mind.”

 

“Oh really?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Why? Why are you so stuck on me?”

 

He leaned forward, pressing his forehead against her. “Because I am so in love you. And because you are the most important person to me.”

 

“Why me, though? Why not the kid? Or Kirijo, even?”

 

“Because you need to be someone’s most important person.”

 

That response shook her a bit. _You need to be someone’s most important person_. She had never thought of it that way. Hell, she had spent her entire life not being important to anyone. Now, though—Tch. Now she meant something to someone. And even if she only meant something to one person, it was one more person that had ever cared before. And he was right. She did need that.

 

“Kiri,” he spoke up, bringing her back to the present moment. “I know this isn’t easy for you, but…” He closed his eyes. “I’ve already lost so many people—Please, I-I can’t lose you, too…”

 

There was a crack in his voice that broke her heart a little. She pulled away from him, rising to her feet, but he wouldn’t let go of her hands, so she didn’t get far. He stood with her and she no longer felt the desire to get away. So, she wound her arms around his neck and kissed him deeply. Tenderly. And he held her against him as he kissed her back.

 

“Damn it, Sanada,” she said once they broke apart.

 

“Yeah?”

 

“I’m so afraid of—of accidentally—unintentionally—I’m so afraid of hurting you. That is the last thing I ever want to do. So please don’t give me the chance to.”

 

“Heh, I think it may be just a little too late for that.” He smiled almost sadly. “I’m not too worried about it, though.”

 

“Tch. You have way too much faith in me for your own good.”

 

“If that’s the case, then I’ll be able to blame myself for any inflicted pain.”

 

She shook her head at him. “I hate you.”

 

“That’s okay. So long as you feel something towards me.”

 

She pushed him away from her, laughing. “Shut up.”

 

He kept his arms clasped around her waist as he laughed as well. “I’m not letting go. I hope you know that.”

 

She blushed lightly. “You got me. I don’t know how, but you did.”

 

“No regrets?”

 

She considered this before smiling again. “No regrets.”


	106. January 17th, 2010

A couple days later, Kirika returned to the dorm after spending nearly the entire day around the cult-infested city, and she was totally wiped out. So as soon as she returned, she headed straight for her bedroom. She got sidetracked along the way, though, when she noticed Junpei was sitting alone on the second floor with a sketchbook.

 

“Iori,” she announced her presence. “Everything okay?”

 

“Depends,” he said.

 

“That sounds like my sort of answer.”

 

“Yeah, I think you’ve rubbed off on all of us a bit.”

 

“If that’s the case, then I am sincerely sorry.”

 

He chuckled. “No big deal.”

 

She sat down with him. “Talk to me.”

 

“I dunno…”

 

“C’mon, you always wanna talk. You love hearing the sound of your own voice.” That got her a sheepish smile. “Talk to me.”

 

Now he sighed, putting the sketchbook down. “To tell you the truth, Senpai, the thought of fighting Nyx scares the shit out of me. But for some reason, when I look at Chidori’s drawings, I feel a hell of a lot more courageous. Ever since she sacrificed herself, I’ve seen life in a whole new way… I won’t let anyone take that from me.”

 

“Huh. Now it sounds like you’ve been spending too much time with Akihiko.”

 

He laughed again. “Maybe all my Senpai are rubbing off on me.”

 

“Yeah, well, you’d be better off with just Akihiko and Kirijo.” She shook her head. “Either way, it’s good that you’ve drawn courage from your remnants of Chidori.” She paused. “Pun not intended.”

 

“I was gonna say… As much of a bastard as he was, that was Ikutsuki worthy.”

 

“Ugh, don’t even say that.”

 

“Heh, sorry.”

 

“Anyway, I bet Chidori would be so proud of you. At how far you’ve come. Because you have come a long way, Iori.” She smiled. “Sure, you’re still a bit of a prick at times, but you have matured in your own…weird way.”

 

“Oh, thanks.”

 

“I do mean that as a compliment.”

 

“Thanks, Senpai.” His tone was less sarcastic that time.

 

She nodded her head once. “And I’m also sure Chidori would be happy to see that you’re doing so well; that you haven’t given up on fighting. She gave you her life for a reason and you’re certainly doing it justice. You’re making her sacrifice worth it. You know that, right?”

 

He swallowed hard. “Coming from you, that means everything.”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“You just seem like the type who really pays attention to stuff like this. I mean, protection is your thing and you’ve sacrificed a lot in your life—”

 

“I really haven’t sacrificed that much.”

 

“Are you kidding? You practically sacrificed your entire childhood. You could’ve gone to an orphanage after your parents died, but you chose to remain on your own. On the streets. Better yet, you could’ve run away from your parents at any point and have gone to an orphanage. You never did, though. And I’d consider that a sacrifice.”

 

“Huh.” She sat back. “Guess I never really thought of it that way.” Another contemplative pause. “I sacrificed my own childhood… Tch. And for what?”

 

“Uhm…” Junpei cleared his throat. “I feel like I may have just opened a door I should’ve left shut. Sorry…”

 

“N-no, it’s fine.” She shook her head. “Don’t mind me, I’m just—I’m—” She took a deep breath. “Forget it. Just keep in mind that her sacrifice has been made worth it.”

 

“Right.” He smiled. “Thanks.”

 

“No problem.” And she rose to her feet.

 

“Hey, uh, Nishioka-san?” Junpei called after her.

 

She stopped to look back at him. “Yeah?”

 

He swallowed hard. “Are you scared, too?”

 

Scared. Tch. That was an understatement. There wasn’t a word good enough to describe how she felt. “Petrified.”

 

“R-really?”

 

“Of course.”

 

“This may sound weird, but…something about knowing that kinda makes me feel better about the situation. Like I have a reason to be scared, y’know?”

 

She shook her head. “Ain’t nothing wrong with being afraid.”

 

He nodded in response. “I know it’s not really any of my business, but, uh…you and Sanada-san…”

 

“What about us?”

 

He paused. “Do you love him?”

 

Her eyes widened a bit. “Oh. Uhm—”

 

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have even asked that. Like I said, it’s not any of my business. Take it from me, though…” He breathed deeply. “Just make sure you tell him how you feel while you still have the chance. Before it’s too late. Because we can say all we want that we’re going to defeat Nyx, but that doesn’t actually mean we are going to defeat Nyx. So, since we don’t know exactly what’s gonna happen, make sure he knows exactly how you feel.”

 

“Y’know, Iori, that’s extremely good advice,” she said. “And an extremely good example at how you’ve matured.”

 

His cheeks reddened a bit. “Thanks again, Senpai.”

 

“No, thank you.”

 

“Hey, guys,” Akihiko suddenly greeted them as he walked up the stairs.

 

“Hey, Sanada-san,” Junpei said. “How was the exam?”

 

“Not bad.” He looked to Kirika and smiled. “Have you eaten yet? It’s still pretty early, so we could—”

 

“I’d love to, but I’m beat,” she told him. “Maybe tomorrow night.”

 

He nodded his head once. “That works.”

 

“Okay.” She kissed him on the cheek. “Goodnight.” She turned back to Junpei. “G’night, Iori.”

 

“Night, Senpai. Thanks again.”

 

“Seriously, stop thanking me.”

 

He chuckled nervously. “Right. Sorry.”

 

She shook her head at him. “Well, I’ll see you two in the morning.”

 

Akihiko smiled at her. “Goodnight.”

 

With that, Kirika finally made it the rest of the way to her bedroom. Once she was inside, she took a deep breath. At that moment, Persephone was at peace within herself. Tch. She couldn’t help but laugh at herself. There used to be a time when she would take that as a bad sign. When she wouldn’t let herself enjoy it. When she was ignorant and afraid. A different kind of fear. Now, though, she took it for what it truly was: Happiness. Now she was only afraid that it wouldn’t last.

 

Hell, she already had the end of the world to deal with. She didn’t want to have to deal with the end of her contentment on top of that. Yet, at the same time… Ugh. She shook her head. This wasn’t what she wanted to be thinking about. She didn’t want that feeling of serenity to be such a fleeting moment. Hmm. That was part of her issue, though.

 

Her whole life had been nothing more than a series of fleeting moments.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, only ten chapters left to post...holy shit, that's kinda insane x.x


	107. January 19th, 2010

A couple mornings later, Kirika decided to sleep in a bit so she could head to the mall alone. She waited until everyone else had gone off to school, and then she left as well. While she was on the tram, though, she ended up bumping into one of her Kohai.

 

“Oh, good morning, Senpai,” Yukari greeted her.

 

“Takeba,” she said back before clearing her throat. “Aren’t you running late?”

 

“Just a little bit, but not late enough where I’ll miss the first bell.”

 

“I figured you would’ve walked to school with Arisato.”

 

Her cheeks flushed. “W-why do you say that?”

 

“Aren’t you two dating?”

 

“What does that have to do with anything?” She shrugged her shoulders. “I mean, you didn’t walk with Akihiko-senpai today.”

 

“Touché.” She paused. “So why are you alone this morning? Trouble in paradise?”

 

“No, just running late like you said.”

 

“Arisato didn’t wait for you?”

 

“I told him he could go on ahead.”

 

“I see.” She nodded. “How are things between you two, then?”

 

“Are you feeling all right, Senpai?” she then asked.

 

“Yeah. Why?”

 

“Nothing. You’re just not typically one to ask so many questions. Especially about the personal lives and relationships of the rest of us.”

 

“You’ve talked with me about Arisato before.”

 

“I know, but that feels like it was so long ago now.”

 

“Exactly. I’m better now than I was then. So, what’s the issue?”

 

“Hmm.” She looked her up and down. “Maybe I should be the one checking if everything is going well between you and Akihiko-san.”

 

Kirika held back an eyeroll. “Oh, yeah, he’s being as sweet as ever. And that gets pretty exasperating at times, but—”

 

“Hold on. Why is it annoying?”

 

“Never mind. It’s complicated. I wouldn’t really expect you to understand.”

 

Yukari cocked at eyebrow at her. “It’s a personal, made up thing, isn’t it?”

 

“Most likely.”

 

Now she laughed. “At least you can accept that.”

 

“Gotta start somewhere, right?”

 

They fell silent for the rest of the short tram ride. When they got off, they started right for Gekkoukan High and Paulownia Mall. The silence continued, but Kirika had a question at the tip of her tongue. And as the school only grew closer, she knew she was losing time to receive an answer.

 

“Hey, can I ask you something?” she spoke up at last.

 

“Of course,” Yukari said.

 

“How long do you think it takes for two people to fall in love?”

 

“Huh.” She stopped in her tracks and Kirika stopped with her. “Well, I think it depends on the people,” Yukari then began. “For some, I’m sure it could take up to at least year or so. For others, it may only take a few weeks.” She shrugged her shoulders. “I wouldn’t say there’s a set amount of time, though.”

 

“No?” She paused, thinking. A few months to a year, huh? Kirika had met Akihiko back in April and joined the group towards the end of July… That would put her well within that timeframe. Hmm… “All right. So, what about Arisato? Do you think you’re in love with him?”

 

Now she blushed. “I-I love him, sure, but I don’t think I’m _in love_ with him yet.”

 

“Wait, what do you mean?”

 

“C’mon, Senpai, there’s a difference between just loving someone and actually being in love with someone.”

 

“You think so?”

 

“Definitely.”

 

“Hmm.” Kirika took this into consideration. Next thing she knew, they were outside the school gates. “Oh, sorry, I don’t mean to keep you.”

 

“It’s fine. Anything else?”

 

“No, I think that’ll do it.” She forced a smile. “Thanks, Takeba.”

 

“You’re welcome, Senpai. See you later this evening.”

 

As Yukari headed into the school, Kirika continued her way to the mall. She took the rest of the short walk to think about the conversations she had had with Kirijo, Iori, and now Takeba. It almost felt as if each talk had somehow been endless, despite having taken place over the course of almost two weeks and with three different people. After all, each talk may as well have ended up being about the same thing. Bringing her to the same conclusion. The same feeling.

 

Two weeks. In just another two weeks was the promised day. The beginning of the end. The Fall. Her mind started racing and her heart started pounding. She felt like there was still so much left for her to do. First and foremost, she had to speak with Akihiko. That right there was her main concern. _He_ was her main concern. Hell, he deserved nothing more than to know the truth about how she felt.

 

“Tch. There’s a difference between loving someone and being in love with someone,” she said to herself. She swallowed hard. She thought about how just the other night Akihiko had said he was so in love with her. He hadn’t stuttered, either. If anything, he had been more than confident with that statement. And there was no way he had misspoken. She shook her head as she found herself laughing under her breath. “Son of a bitch, how did you do this to me, Aki? You have wrecked me in the best possible way.”


	108. January 20th, 2010

2:00am.

 

Kirika couldn’t sleep. She had been under the impression the Dark Hour and Tartarus were supposed to exhaust people but, apparently, they did the opposite to her. Instead, they kept her wide awake.

 

The group had been continuing their explorations of Tartarus as if nothing had changed. It felt as if nothing had changed, too. Tartarus was the same as always, with just as many Shadows as before. And it still seemed endless. Topless.

 

2:04.

 

There was a barely audible knock on her bedroom door. She knew exactly who was going to be standing on the other side. Akihiko. Then when she opened it, there he was. And he seemed just as wide awake as she was. But he seemed more tense, as well.

 

Without a single word having been spoken, he stepped into the room. She quietly closed the door behind him but didn’t move from that spot. She just leaned on her shoulder against the door, still holding onto the knob. By this point, she knew better than to say anything, so she simply waited. She waited as he paced the room, gathering his scattered thoughts. She could only imagine this was how he was before a boxing match. Before a challenge.

 

2:16.

 

“Kirika Nishioka,” he finally spoke up.

 

She took a deep breath, finally stepping away from the door. “That would be my name.” Persephone was stirring with anticipation.

 

“Yeah. Your name is Kirika Nishioka. You’re eighteen years old, and your birthday is the sixteenth of October.”

 

Shit… He was actually doing this. He was actually gonna state every fact he remembered and knew about her. Every detail he had learned about her. Every nuance and mannerism he had picked up on. He was actually gonna prove how he knew her better than she knew herself.

 

“When you were only eleven years old,” he went on, “you awakened to your Persona, Idun—who has now evolved into Persephone—who is a protector and an _incredible_ healer. A defender. Although, you find those abilities more ironic than anything due to how you discovered them. But that’s not something I need to mention. Partly because you obviously know what happened, but mainly because you hate when it’s brought up. You hate having to think about it. To relive it. So, I won’t make you.” He swallowed hard. “After the unsaid incident, you left the city. You left everything behind, including your childhood. Ever since then, you have spent your life traveling from place to place, never remaining anywhere for longer than two months. I’m not sure exactly where you’ve been, but something tells me you never knew exactly where you were, either.”

 

Kirika folded her arms across her chest. She already felt exposed and vulnerable, and she couldn’t decide if it felt good or not.

 

Akihiko paused for a moment. “You don’t like telling strangers your self-given name, nor do you care to learn the names of others. In fact, you prefer not to have anything to do with other people. You don’t do friendships or any sort of relationships because you don’t like growing attached to people. And you don’t like to grow attached because you believe it makes things easier in the long run. Not just for you, but for everyone. No attachments mean no losses and no goodbyes, which also means not having to worry about getting hurt. Or getting left behind. And you would never admit to that being one of your biggest fears. So, you have spent almost your entire life strictly in the company of your Persona, even though you have a strong dislike for your abilities due to the incident from when you were younger.”

 

She fell against her door again, almost in a complete state of shock. That only added to the feelings of exposure and vulnerability, though.

 

He took a deep breath, seemingly having to calm himself down. “Now you’ve been back in this city for about nine months, and you’ve made friends and you’ve lost a friend. You still debate taking off again at times, but you’ve learned it’s okay to remain in one place. It’s okay to be involved with people. To grow attached. And you still have a strong dislike for your Persona abilities, but you’ve also grown more comfortable with them. Or so it seems. You are still pretty good at lying, after all. So much so that you even believe your own deceits half the time. Yet, you can’t always tell when someone else sees right through them.”

 

Akihiko took another pause as he collected more of his rising thoughts. This time, though, he stopped to finally look at Kirika. He looked at her for the first time since he had started speaking. Her back was still against her door with her gaze was turned downwards. Her breathing was uneven, and she still couldn’t decide if she was enjoying feeling exposed and vulnerable. It was all so new to her… But that didn’t necessarily make it a bad thing. In most recent cases for her, new was usually good.

 

“Things have changed. Your world has turned upside since you returned to this city. In both good and bad ways,” he soon continued. “I mean, now there’s someone in your life who cares about you and loves you and knows you better than you know yourself. You didn’t believe he did, but that was just your fear of attachment popping up again. In fact, each time you shut down and pull away, it’s that same fear acting up. You’re terrified of the possibility of someone knowing you well enough to read you; to be able to figure you out just by the expression on your face or the tone of your voice or even your posture. It’s hard for you to accept. You’re probably gonna apologise for doubting me, too, despite the fact that you hate saying sorry because it doesn’t fix anything. And you know what? You’re right. It doesn’t. But the sentiment still means something. So, I will accept your unspoken apology. Just like I’ve accepted the fact that you still try to make things way more complicated than they need to be. I don’t care, though. I don’t mind.”

 

She was beginning to feel almost sick, like she was breaking into a cold sweat. She grew fidgety, and she was having a pretty hard time catching her breath. Then he stepped up to her and placed his hands on her shoulders in the most comforting way. And with that simple touch—that spark—she still felt exposed and vulnerable, but… Hell, did she feel good about it. Persephone felt good about it.

 

“I do want you to know—I _need_ you to know—I’m not doing this to prove you wrong or anything like that,” he said, still holding onto her. “I’ve only done this because I need you to understand just how much I care. I need you to understand that someone can have seen the worst side of you and still be so in love with you. And that may scare you away even more or—Or maybe it’ll bring the rest of your walls crumbling down.”

 

She remained silent, her gaze on his chest. She couldn’t force herself to meet his eyes yet. Persephone was in a state of…shock. Relief. Fear. Angst. Hell, he had brought up facts about her she didn’t even remember mentioning to him. But she supposed that was the point. Tch. He really did know her better than she knew herself. And he was right about that both scaring her and freeing her.

 

2:38.

 

He hesitantly removed his hands from her shoulders. Like if he did, it’d be the last time he could have touched her. “You really hate me right now, huh?”

 

She let out a little laugh, straining to keep it quiet. “I do.” She paused. Huh. Did she hate him? Well, no, of course not. She knew that and he knew that, but—It wasn’t fair to him anymore. Saying that… Keeping it from him… “A-actually…no, I don’t.”

 

“What?”

 

She folded her arms across her chest. “I’ll admit it, Aki, you clearly do know me. I claimed you didn’t, but I couldn’t have been more wrong. I mean, you’re the first person who’s ever been able to talk on about me like that for…I don’t even know how long.” She shook her head. “Long enough, I guess.”

 

He smiled. “I pay attention.”

 

“And I appreciate that because that was incredible. The fact that you’ve retained all that information, and that you were able to decipher even more info about me just by reading into my behaviour is pretty remarkable.”

 

“C’mon, now you’re only making it sound like I’ve just analysed you as a psych patient or something.”

 

Her laugh caught in her throat as she fought back tears. “That’s not how I meant it.” She swallowed hard. “Although, there is one pretty important fact you missed.”

 

“Oh? And what would that be?”

 

“Y-you.”

 

“Me?” He considered this, his brow furrowed. “What do you mean?”

 

“I-I—I, uhm…” She cleared her throat, finally bringing her gaze up to meet his. This was it. Now or never. “I love you, too, Aki.”

 

His eyes widened a bit before a smile formed across his lips. A smile that made him seem almost…relieved. Grateful. “By this point, y’know, I was kind of afraid you were gonna wait till after the thirty-first to say it back…if at all.”

 

“Honestly,” she attempted to discreetly rub her eyes, “I’m surprised you didn’t wait that long in the first place.”

 

“I wasn’t gonna take that risk.”

 

“Yeah. Kirijo told me I shouldn’t take it, either.”

 

He nodded his head once. “Despite believing we can defeat Nyx, taking that chance still wouldn’t have been worth it. After all, I do understand we might not—”

 

“Stop,” she said. “Please, don’t—” She closed her eyes. “Let’s not think about that right now. I don’t want to.”

 

“Then let me ask what made you decide to say it.”

 

“Well, there was something Kirijo had said during our talk that really resonated with me. Then Takeba and even Iori had said some things that also got me thinking. Plus, with everything you just said, it made it that much clearer to me.”

 

He smiled again. “I’m glad.” He brushed some of her hair out of her face. “I bet Shinji is rolling his eyes at us right now.”

 

She chuckled. “Most likely.”

 

Akihiko then took a step closer to her. She went to move back, but she was still practically right up against the door. He closed the distance between himself and Kirika, giving her no choice but to push herself against the door. He placed one hand on the nape of her neck and the other on her waist. He leaned into her, ghosting his lips over her own. He pulled back for a brief moment before kissing her deeply. She rested both her hands on his chest, and she kissed him back. When he pulled away, her breath caught in her throat. Her head spun and she found herself grasping onto his shirt, her knees having gone a bit weak. Her eyes fluttered open to find him staring at her, a small smile—a smirk—across his lips. She blushed deeply.

 

“C’mon,” she said. “You’re not—You don’t s-seem like the type—the type to, uhm—to lose…control.”

 

“No?” They were still only a breath apart. “You don’t wanna just close your eyes and let our bodies do the rest of the talking?”

 

That was when she pushed him away, laughing. “Did you really just say that? Tch. You are such an idiot.”

 

His cheeks were a deep red, but he still looked serious. So Kirika calmed herself down before stepping away from the door to close the distance between them again, Akihiko gladly welcoming her back into his arms. And for a while, they simply stood in the middle of the room holding onto each other. Kissing. There wasn’t anything left to be said anyhow.

 

Soon enough, they crawled into bed and beneath the covers. Akihiko wrapped his arms around Kirika to hold her close, and she buried her face in his warm chest. She listened to the pounding of his heartbeat. The way it fell in sync with hers as it relaxed. She was content. She felt safe and warm. She felt at home. She felt like a normal teenage girl.

 

She had come to learn that that was the best feeling in the world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those of you who have maybe not played p3p or the fem MC's story, "Just close your eyes and let our bodies do the talking" is a legitimate line Akihiko uses with her and it seriously cracks me up every time, so I couldn't resist throwing it in there. I mean, c'mon, Akihiko is the only person who could get away with using a line like that lmao


	109. Jamuary 25th, 2010

The days to follow were comprised of recurrent outings to Tartarus. With the promised day fast approaching—barely even a week now—the group was beginning to fall into a slight frenzy. So, training had become an even bigger priority than ever before. On the day of the juniors’ career counseling, though, they decided beforehand they would use that as an excuse to take a break. And on Kirika’s walk home from the mall that evening, she bumped into Fuuka and Aigis.

 

“Hello, Senpai,” Fuuka greeted her.

 

“Hey, I don’t think I’ve ever seen either of you out this late,” she said.

 

“It was a long day.”

 

“Right. How was career counseling?”

 

“Oh, it went well.”

 

“And what have you decided you’re going to do?”

 

“I’m planning on going to college.” Fuuka nodded, a look of bewilderment in her eyes. “We’re fighting Nyx in less than a week, yet I’m making plans to go to college.”

 

She laughed a little. “Good. Don’t stop making those plans.” She turned to the other. “So, what about you, Aigis?”

 

“I am unsure of what I will do,” Aigis said. “To answer the teacher’s prompt, though, I simply told her I was planning on going right into the workforce. Plus, seeing as I am not the average student, I do not think college would be the ideal choice for me. Yet, I was only built to destroy Shadows, so I do not know what else I could do for a career. It is a lot to think about and I have only just begun to learn the process of _living_.”

 

“You’re thinking too hard. Just let it come naturally.”

 

“Natural?”

 

“Yeah. Do whatever feels right to you.”

 

“I see…”

 

“I have faith you’ll figure it out,” Fuuka went on. “What about you, Senpai?” She turned her attention to Kirika. “I know you don’t attend school, but do you have any plans for the future?”

 

“Yes and no,” Kirika said. “I mean, I have an idea as to what I want to do with my life, I just don’t know how to go about doing it. I guess… I don’t even really know where I’ll be once the school year ends.”

 

“You mean you will not be here?” Aigis said.

 

She shrugged her shoulders. “I’m not sure.”

 

“Well, you’ll at least be here to see Akihiko-senpai and Mitsuru-senpai graduate, right?” Fuuka checked.

 

“Shit. They are graduating, aren’t they? Hmm… Somehow that fact just keeps slipping my mind.”

 

“I know. With everything going on, I don’t know how they’ve managed to stay so on top of things. It’s very inspirational.”

 

“And quite admirable,” Aigis went on.

 

“Well, I may just end up continuing to travel,” Kirika then said. “Never been much of a homebody, after all. Plus, it’s not like I have anywhere to go in particular. So maybe I’ll just go everywhere.”

 

Fuuka furrowed her brow, almost out of bewilderment. “Oh, you don’t plan on staying with Akihiko-san? I mean, couldn’t you just travel to wherever he attends college?”

 

“Like a puppy?” She shook her head. “Not my style. Besides, I should give him the chance to be independent.”

 

“Not sure if I’ll want that chance,” a male voice said. Akihiko then showed up beside the three girls. “Not my style.”

 

“Tch. You have impeccable timing.”

 

He smiled. “If you ask me, independence is a bit overrated.”

 

“If you ask me, so are relationships.”

 

“C’mon, stop being so ridiculous.”

 

“What are you even doing here?”

 

“Training. What else?” He kissed her on the cheek. “See you back at the dorm.” And he jogged off.

 

Kirika blushed lightly as she watched him disappear. She then chuckled out of distress. “On second thought…maybe I will just go wherever he goes.”

 

Fuuka giggled. “You two are cute together.”

 

“Even Mitsuru-san believes you two make a perfect couple,” Aigis said.

 

Now Kirika let out a heavy sigh. “Perfect is a strong word.”

 

“A strong word for two strong people.”

 

“Why have you even stuck around for this long if you still think about leaving?” Fuuka went on.

 

“Uhm…” She cleared her throat. “Well, I promised Aragaki I would look after Akihiko for him. And I’ll be damned if I break that promise, but—” She shook her head again. “I dunno. Anyway… Speaking of strength, are you guys ready to fight Nyx?”

 

“Oh, yes, I think I am,” Fuuka went along with the subject change.

 

“I am ready to defeat Nyx,” Aigis said. “I will fight to serve and protect my friends. And together, we shall succeed.”

 

Kirika smiled. “I admire your confidence.”

 

“Are you not confident?”

 

“Please, I’m terrified. I’m still trying to figure out whether or not Persephone will actually be useful during this battle.”

 

“We have faith in you, Senpai,” Fuuka said.

 

“Yeah, Akihiko mentioned that… I just don’t want you all relying on me too much in case Persephone can’t pull through.”

 

“Don’t worry, we still rely on everyone as a group.”

 

She nodded. “Guess there’s not much else we can do except continue to train. After all, we may have no control over the outcome of the battle, but we do have control over what we bring to it. So, let’s be sure to bring our best fight.”

 

Fuuka smiled. “Definitely.”

 

“Indeed, we will,” Aigis said.

 

“No matter what, though, it’ll be good enough. Nyx will never know what hit her. So maybe she’s the one who should be afraid.”

 

Now Fuuka laughed. “Akihiko-san is right; you can be a bit ridiculous. No offence.”

 

“None taken.” She sighed again. “Y’know, I feel more ready now than I did towards the beginning of this conversation.”

 

“Me too.”

 

“Yes, we are more than prepared,” Aigis said.

 

“I think you’re right,” Kirika said. “With that being the case, I’ll face Nyx head-on. I’ll look her straight in the eye and I will not back down. I won’t make it easy for her to knock any of us down, either.” She took a deep breath, nodding. “Yeah. I’m ready.”


	110. January 28th, 2010

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The palm reading deck I have referenced in this chapter is "Palm Reading: The Complete Kit" miniature guide book by Dennis Fairchild and Julie Kaschkis, published in 2006

“Three days,” Akihiko said that evening. He was with Kirika in her bedroom, and they were both lying on the floor, just staring at the ceiling. “Can you believe it? We’re gonna be facing Nyx in just three days.”

 

“Yeah? Huh. My plan has been to not think about it until the Dark Hour on the thirty-first hits,” Kirika said. “It’s been working so far.”

 

“Then help me take my mind off it somehow. Actually…” He sat up.  “You never read my palm. I mean, back when we first started dating, we were on the tram and you were tracing my hand and you mentioned something about palm reading.”

 

She stared at him in awe before chuckling. “I don’t think I’ll ever get over how incredible your memory is.”

 

He smiled in return. “Well, would you still be interested?”

 

“This is super random.”

 

“That doesn’t answer the question.”

 

Now she sat up, turning to face him. “I guess I will if you want me to.”

 

“I do want you to. And it will help to temporarily keep my mind off things.” He shrugged his shoulders. “So, let’s see what it is you can tell me about myself and my future and whatever else palm reading entails.”

 

“Do you want a tarot reading as well?”

 

“Nah. Palm reading seems more…personal.”

 

She held back a blush. “Y’know, you’re gonna have to take off your gloves for this.”

 

He laughed. “I think I can do that.”

 

So, they sat cross-legged on the floor, facing one another. Akihiko removed his gloves and held out his hands. Kirika’s placed her own beneath his.

 

“First things first,” she started, “you probably don’t realise there’s a lot more that goes into palm reading than just telling you what the little lines of your hands mean. And each hand represents something different.”

 

He paused. “Huh?”

 

She caught a laugh, though she still smiled. “Your left represents you personally; it’s your private side. It reveals your dreams, fantasies, hopes, so on and so forth. Then your right hand represents the way you show yourself to the world; it’s your public side. Size is a factour as well.”

 

“You’re right. I definitely did not realise so much went into palm reading.”

 

“How do you think I’ve managed to earn a living off it?”

 

“Good point.”

 

“Now, I’d say your hands are on the bigger side. So that would make you versatile and curious. You are full of mental energy, and also aggressive about getting what you want, but flexible enough to see another point of view.” She pulled her hands away. “Could you apply pressure to your fingers, carefully bending them backwards?” He did as he was asked on both of his hands, then put them back out. “The degree of flexibility of your fingers explains how adaptable you are,” she went on. “The stiffer, the stingier. The more flexible, the more willing you are to avoid confrontation.”

 

“So, what would that make me?”

 

“Well, you’re definitely not stingy.”

 

“But I don’t avoid confrontation, either.”

 

“You don’t avoid it, no, but you do have a preference against it.”

 

“Tch.”

 

She took his hands again. “You have a shorter palm with longer fingers,” she continued. “That makes you mentally alert, insatiably curious, and you enjoy exchanging opinions and ideas. To you, putting together a puzzle’s pieces is stimulating. You are intelligent, well-mannered, and diplomatic. You also try to avoid arguments.”

 

He rolled his eyes. “That again…”

 

“Sorry, Aki, but it’s in your hands.”

 

His look of exasperation turned into a glare. “Was that supposed to be a pun?”

 

“Yeah, I’m pretty ashamed of myself right now.” She shook her head, clearing her throat. “Anyway.” She flipped his hands. “Being a boxer, you have pretty prominent knuckles. So that would signify reasoning abilities. You are a problem-solver and tend to rely on logic.” She turned his hands back over. “As for your fingertips, they seem to flare at the tip, and then sort of taper in towards the knuckles a bit. That would make sense, though, because that would mean you love physical activity. Oh, it also means you’re not a lover of detail, and you’re better with facts rather than philosophy.”

 

“This is gonna take longer than I had anticipated.”

 

“We don’t have to finish.”

 

“Unfortunately, I’m too intrigued to let you stop now.”

 

She smiled. “Good.” She flipped his hands again. “Moving on to the fingernails.”

 

“Fingernails?”

 

“Yes. Pretty much every part of the hand is analysed.”

 

“Damn. You’re gonna know my hands better than I do by the time we’re finished with this.”

 

“We’ll call it even for you knowing me better than I know myself.”

 

He chuckled. “Deal.”

 

“Okay. Now, like your hands, your fingernails are also on the bigger side. And that makes you a big thinker. Once you decide you want something, you are not easily distracted or discouraged, and you often succeed due to persistent single-mindedness.”

 

“That means Nyx will be defeated.”

 

She shook her head at him, lips pursed. “I knew you were gonna say that. Tch. And you call me ridiculous.” She released his hands. “Could you tell me whether the ridges of your nails form vertically or horizontally?”

 

He examined his fingernails closely. “Vertically. I think?”

 

“That makes you a worrywart. You’re almost too compassionate because of a need for love, and you have great difficulty drawing the line with dependent people. You are a dreamer, and often get so mired in your fantasies that you forget the mundane world of paying bills and doing housework. Even so, you’re far too critical of yourself.”

 

“Sounds more like you than me.”

 

“Yeah, even I’ll admit that one’s a bit iffy.”

 

“What’s next?”

 

“Fingerprints.” She turned his hands over once more. “You seem to have the arch type of prints, which means you are efficient, hard-working, and reliable. It also means you’re cautious and conservative in your ideas and opinions, acting as more of a follower than a pioneer. You’re comfortable with the tried-and-true.”

 

“Hey, I am not a follower.”

 

“C’mon, you’re not even the leader of SEES, Arisato is. And you’ve been around two and a half years longer than him.”

 

“He was only appointed leader because I was injured when he joined. Then by the time I was able to get back in the fight, I wanted to be able to focus strictly on training since I had lost a couple months.”

 

“Exactly.”

 

“But—”

 

“Give it up, Aki.”

 

He sighed. “Fine.”

 

“Next are your wrist lines,” she went on. “You show three distinct lines, which denote great physical strength and endurance. Money and possessions also give you a sense of security, and you enjoy great pleasure in seeing a job well done. You plan carefully and work hard.”

 

“Money and possessions do not give me a sense of security.”

 

“The rest of it was accurate, though. Most of it has been pretty damn accurate, as a matter of fact.”

 

“But there’s still more, so don’t get ahead of yourself. The rest may not be as precise.”

 

“Let’s find out. Next we examine just the fingers.”

 

“I bet Shinji is shaking his head at me right now for letting you do this.”

 

“I did the tarot reading with him, remember?”

 

He paused. “Damn it, I forgot you had mentioned that.”

 

“Oh, of course. Of all the things for you to have forgotten about.” He sneered jokingly and she winked at him playfully in return. “You ready to move on now?”

 

“Go right ahead.”

 

“Okay. So, each finger has a legitimate name and tells a specific story, and they are named for ancient mythological deities or heavenly planets. The index finger is named Jupiter and it reveals your assertiveness. The middle finger is called Saturn and denotes how you learn things and how disciplined you are. Venus, the ring finger, reveals your style, personal flair, and happiness with work and your appreciation of the arts. The little finger, Mercury, deals with how you communicate and learn—your wits. The thumb, Uranus, speaks of ego, individuality, perseverance, and sense of self-worth.”

 

“Y’know, you say I have an incredible memory, yet you’ve managed to remember all of this information.”

 

“Once you recite it enough times, it kinda becomes second nature.”

 

“And that’s pretty damn incredible.”

 

She blushed faintly. “C’mon, stop interrupting me, yeah? That’s part of the reason why this is taking so damn long.”

 

“Okay, okay, sorry.”

 

“Palms down,” she said. He did as he was told and she did her examining. “All right. So, your index finger rises above the nail base of your middle finger, putting it on the longer side. That suggests a healthy ego; you have faith in yourself. You test your own limits and believe that you never know what you can do until you try. You take pride in yourself and in your accomplishments. You also have a strong sense of self, and always seek new ways to do things.” She examined again. “Your middle finger is long, straight, and stands proudly above the rest, symbolizing a love for schedule. You’re serious about your commitments, and don’t mind being alone. Work is very important to you, and you’re happiest when situations are orderly and structured. You possess natural executive abilities and you are known for shrewdness, diligence, and reliability. And while you’re ambitious, status and recognition are not as important to you as honour and personal happiness.” And more examinations. “Your ring finger seems to be about the same length as your index. That would mean you don’t fear showing your emotions. Caring for others makes your world safe and desirable.” She chuckled a bit. “If I had done this when I first met you, I would’ve called bullshit on that one myself.”

 

“Huh? I care about others.”

 

“Yeah, but you’ve never really been one to express yourself until pretty recently.”

 

“Says you.”

 

“Whatever.” She pulled his left hand a little closer. “Your little finger just barely reaches above the ring finger’s top knuckle, revealing that you think big and talk well. Optimistic and thrill-seeking, your enthusiasm is contagious. It’s also a bit squared off at the tip, meaning you speak—and argue—well. You state your case with exactness because you act from equality and fairness.” She released his hand. “Could you tell me whether you have three or more lines below your ring finger or your little finger?”

 

Now he examined his own hand again. “Little finger.”

 

“Mercury Lines,” she went on. “That suggests you are good at decision-making, and see things logically. You pride yourself on efficiency and your dedication to duty and to get the job done.” She took his hand again. “Like the rest of your fingers, your thumb seems to be on the longer side. This is the sign of a strong ego. You’re one who is always ready with a word of encouragement. And you are secure in a commanding position—”

 

“I know.”

 

She shot him a quick glare. “Any who, pride keeps you from becoming overly dependent on others,” she continued. “Your thumb also seems a bit inflexible and stiff-tipped, which makes you argumentative. You rarely take chances with time or money. And while your friendships may be few, they are usually forever.”

 

“You have now contradicted two things. Being a follower versus being leader, and being one to avoid confrontation versus being argumentative.”

 

“Just because you lean more towards being a follower, doesn’t mean you can’t be a leader as well. And then if you ask me, being argumentative is all the better reason to want to avoid confrontation in the first place.”

 

He paused. “Guess I’ll give you that.”

 

“Now, your thumb hugs your fingers more than it ‘shuns’ them. So that means you are secretive and close-minded and don’t trust others easily. You reveal little about yourself, but you want to know everything about others and what makes them _tick_. Stubborn and willful, you like having your own way. You also don’t like to do things spontaneously or without adequate planning.”

 

“I’ll say that’s half correct.”

 

“I’m not done yet.”

 

“How much more of the thumb can you possibly analyse?”

 

She laughed a little. “Your thumb has something known as a _waist_ , which suggests tact. Your boundless curiosity and desire to learn is important. Then the rise here below your thumb,” she gently traced the area and held back a smile when he closed his eyes at the touch, “is called the Mount of Apollo. And, much like the sun god for which it’s named, it speaks of personal warmth and high energy levels. Yours is high and round, meaning you are generous, possess enthusiasm for life, and recover quickly from illness. Self-expression is also a major concern. Although you yourself may not be great with words, you still communicate loud and clear.”

 

“Seriously still impressed with how you’re able to retain all this information. I mean, it’s all so particular…”

 

“Are you done?”

 

“I’m sorry, I’ll be sure to stop complimenting you.”

 

“Y’know, we’re finally getting into the actual palm lines now.”

 

“Oh, thank god. It’s about time.”

 

She pursed her lips. “Yeah, that’s what Shinji said.” She cleared her throat. “Every palm is different. Every palm can change. The way the lines are drawn say something about you in themselves.” She took his hand in hers once more. “For you, it seems you have fewer lines, meaning you are more of a physical, organised spirit. But these few lines are also deep and well-etched, meaning you have strong feelings, and specific likes and dislikes. You’re not one for typical storybook romances, or fly-by-night schemes.”

 

“Kinda ironic,” he said.

 

“Little bit since you’re more of a romantic than I am.”

 

“I wouldn’t call our relationship a storybook romance.”

 

“True enough.”

 

“I was more so referring to the fly-by-night schemes, though. I mean, that’s basically what our trips to Tartarus are.”

 

“To an extent, I guess. They’re not really schemes, though. And I think you’re taking the term _fly-by-night_ a little too literally.”

 

“Huh.” He paused. “Go on,” he then prompted.

 

“Right. First is the Life Line, or the Vitality Line.” She traced the line on his palm. “Rather than revealing how long you’ll live, though, it speaks of your enthusiasm for life, as well as your willingness to fight for what you want and love. Your Life Line starts high under the index finger, signifying a need for acknowledgment. The ultimate individualist, you can’t bear to have someone tell you what to do or how to do it. You are energetic, but you may have trouble focusing your abundant energy. Although you enjoy praise, it’s almost impossible for you to accept advice or acknowledge errors.”

 

“Yeah, I’m only giving you half for that one, too.”

 

“Yeah, that was kind of all over the place, huh?” She shook her head. “Either way, next is the Head Line. This one is all about your quality of mind and intellectual appetite.” As she had done before, she traced the line on his palm. “Now, you have a longer Head Line, which means you respect knowledge and equal rights. You never tire of learning new things. You may also tend to overestimate yourself, but your willingness to learn takes you far. It’s also deeper-etched, meaning you harness your wits and put know-how to good use. Optimistic and idealistic, you always see the silver lining inside every cloud, and believe things will turn out for the better. It also travels straight and level across your palm, which says you’re a just-the-facts, cool, logical type. You prefer to talk only with those whom you know well, and you hold stubbornly to your beliefs. Clear thinking is your ideology.”

 

“I’m not so sure about that last part.”

 

“Neither am I. Just let me finish, though. Next is the Heart Line.” Following her routine, she traced the line on his palm. “This line is an emotional barometer and tells about your affection for people in general, not just lovers. This line is deeply-etched—just like the others—stating you place great emphasis on home and family.” She swallowed hard. “And whether or not your experiences with your family are positive, your ties to them are strong.” She paused to look at him, but he had now focused all his attention on their hands. So, she decided she would just keep going. “You have a pretty wide space between your Heart Line and Head Line, so you approach life eagerly and aggressively, and are willing to take chances. And for once, this line is actually on the shorter side.” A light blush spread across her cheeks. “This means that no one takes love, relationships, and, uhm…sex more seriously than you do. Passionate and playful, sensual yet sensible, you don’t leap into love affairs blindly.”

 

He leaned forward and kissed her. “No, I don’t.”

 

Her blush deepened as she turned her head away, that action having caught her off guard a bit. “Next is the Fate Line,” she continued, tracing the line on his palm. “It tells how you feel about the material world and economic opportunities. A straight, clear line—like what you have—denotes a prevailing sense of contentment with your belongings. It also seems to start within the Life Line, which states that many of your tests and financial hurdles will involve home and family. Your physical home spells security and stability to you. _Old ways_ make you feel safe.”

 

“So…what? That’s supposed to be more of a prediction?”

 

“That would be why it’s called the Fate Line.”

 

He paused. “Shut up.”

 

She laughed. “Moving on to the Venus Line,” she traced it, “yours seems to be predicting help from family. You’re attentive, affectionate, and loyal to those you love. Then there’s the Mercury Line.” More tracing. “Another straight, clear line. It says you know how to have a good time, and you never take life too seriously. You rarely allow depression, nervousness, or worry to overpower you.”

 

He shrugged his shoulders. “I guess…”

 

“Lastly,” she traced a couple short lines, “the Affection Lines. Your deep and well-etched lines signify that you are capable of strong, sincere, affectionate, and lasting friendships, concerned with permanence and security.” She curled his fingers to close his hands. “And there you have it.”

 

Keeping their hands connected, Akihiko leaned forward and kissed her again. “Thank you.” He smiled. “Not gonna lie, that was pretty accurate. For the most part, at least.”

 

Kirika smiled back. “I’m glad you don’t feel like your time has been wasted.”

 

“Please. No amount of time I spend with you is ever wasted.”

 

Kirika blushed again. Hard. And she could’ve sworn Persephone blushed with her. Then, without knowing exactly what came over her, she practically pounced Akihiko, knocking him back as she kissed him. He laughed into the kiss, wrapping his arms around her. For a while, they remained on the floor like that. For a while, Kirika didn’t want to move. She didn’t want this moment to end. And when Akihiko rolled them over so that he was the one towering over her, her stomach turned with them. It flipped and her heart started to race. It was racing so when he finally pulled away from her, it could try to catch up.

 

“Waste your time with me until the world ends?” she said, her voice barely more than a whisper.

 

He continued smiling as he moved to lay on the floor beside her. “I wouldn’t spend my time any other way.”


	111. January 30th, 2010

That chilly afternoon, Kirika found herself sitting in front of Shinjiro’s tombstone. At least an hour had passed since she first sat down, but she had yet to say anything. Ironically enough, she was there for more of a comfort than anything else. Though, the cold January air was quite uncomfortable, especially with the strong breeze.

 

“Wouldn’t surprise me if you were causing that breeze,” she finally spoke up. “I bet that’s you trying to tell me to go home before I get sick. Can’t bring myself to go the dorm right now, though. Not with everything that’s supposed to happen tomorrow.” She let out a heavy sigh. “Sometimes I can’t help but wonder where I’d be right now if I had just stuck to my two-month rule. If I had, I would’ve been out of here by June. So that means I never would’ve gotten shot. Never would’ve gotten that frigging head injury, either. Or the second one, at least.” She shook her head. “And Akihiko never would’ve asked me to join SEES, which then obviously means I never would have joined the group. So, then I wouldn’t have had to deal with losing you. I wouldn’t have to live with the regret of not being able to save Kirijo’s father. Better yet, I wouldn’t know about the end of the world. I would’ve been able to—somewhat—live in peace until the Fall. I wouldn’t be so ready to—” She stopped herself, swallowing hard. “Join you,” she said instead with a shaky breath. Then she smiled. “Oh, and Akihiko… Hell, that boy has done more for me than I ever could’ve imagined; than I ever could’ve asked for.” She shrugged her shoulders, still smiling, but it swiftly fell away. “I know I’m supposed to be the defender, but I think I’m the one who’s the most fearful about tomorrow. So, I want you to promise me something, Aragaki. Promise me that you’ll be there. You’ll fight alongside us, won’t you?” Just then, there was another strong breeze. She closed her eyes as the smile returned to her face. “Tch. I knew I could count on you.”

 

“I had a feeling I’d find you here,” Akihiko then said. She turned to see him walking over to her. “How long have you been here?”

 

“A little over an hour, I think. Possibly longer.”

 

“Aren’t you cold?”

 

“Freezing.”

 

He laughed. “You’re ridiculous.” He looked down at the tombstone. “Y’know…of course I have faith in the group, but I still can’t help but imagine what Shinji would say to me if I did meet him in Heaven tomorrow.”

 

“Oh yeah? And what would he say?”

 

“Nothing. He would just punch me in the face. He’s got a strong right hook, too, so I’m sure it would hurt like hell.”

 

Now she laughed. “I’m sure he’d throw an _idiot_ in there somewhere, as well.”

 

“Probably.”

 

“I can’t help but wonder what’ll happen if we all forget. I mean,” she stood up, “doesn’t that mean we’d forget about how Shinji died? And how Kirijo’s father, and Ikutsuki, and Chidori died. We’d all join the civilians who don’t remember anything. All their deaths would just be…random incidents. Insignificant, almost. And I don’t want that to be the case.”

 

“Yeah, I don’t like the sound of that, either. There’s not much we can do about that aspect, though. If we do defeat Nyx, there’s no way of knowing what’ll happen to us after.”

 

“Ryoji said if we killed him we’d lose our powers and forget everything…” she said. “So, will the result be the same if we defeat Nyx?”

 

He shrugged his shoulders. “I guess it very well could be. Only one way to find out.”

 

“We won’t really find out, though, because if we don’t remember then this whole concept kinda becomes pointless.”

 

“You’re thinking too much.”

 

She sighed. “Yeah…”

 

“C’mon, it’s freezing out here. Let’s get back to the dorm.”

 

“Okay.”

 

So, they made their way to the dorm. For the duration of the walk, they huddled close to one another, sharing what little body heat they had left. After all, the wind seemed to be blowing stronger and stronger with each step they took. But as soon as the dorm entered their line of view, just the thought of warmth took away some of the chill.

 

“Hey, Nishioka-san,” Junpei practically yelled as soon as they walked through the door. “Akihiko-san told us you read his palm the other day.”

 

She stopped. “What?” She cocked an eyebrow at Akihiko. “Were you bragging about it or something?”

 

“Nah, Mitsuru-san questioned him on why he had been in your room for so long.”

 

Mitsuru’s eyes narrowed. “You were eavesdropping, Iori?”

 

“Uh…”

 

For once, Kirika was thankful for the cold. It left the others unable to notice how red from embarrassment her face had turned since her cheeks were still rosy from the winter air. At least she felt pretty warm now.

 

“Either way,” Yukari started, “we were just wondering if you’d be willing to read our palms as well.”

 

“All of you?” Kirika said.

 

“Not myself or Koro-chan,” Aigis said. “You wouldn’t be very successful otherwise.”

 

She chuckled. “Of course. But the rest of you want me to?”

 

“If you don’t mind,” Fuuka said.

 

“Oh. Well…I mean, I guess it’d be okay. I just hope there weren’t any plans for us to go to Tartarus tonight, because doing this for the six of you—”

 

“You don’t have to read mine,” Ken told her. “I don’t believe in that kind of stuff.”

 

“Neither do I,” Akihiko spoke up. “It sure is a damn good distraction, though.”

 

“Well, there were no plans for a Tartarus trip tonight,” Mitsuru went on. “With the final battle being tomorrow, we decided it’d be smart to take it easy tonight.”

 

“True,” Kirika said. “Okay. Five palm readings it is.”

 

“Four,” Minato said. “I’ll pass, too.”

 

She nodded. “Why am I not surprised?”

 

“Oh, oh, me first,” Junpei said.

 

“Since Takeba is the one who actually asked, she gets to go first.”

 

He folded his arms across his chest. “Fine.”

 

“Do you need to get anything from your room before you start?” Yukari checked. “Some sort of palm reading supplies or…whatever?”

 

“No, she recites it all from memory,” Akihiko said.

 

Fuuka’s eyes widened a bit. “Wow, that’s impressive, Senpai.”

 

“Well, I do this for a living after all, so…” Kirika shrugged her shoulders. “No big deal.” She took a seat in one of the armchairs. “C’mere,” she said, gesturing to Yukari. She sat down at the end of the couch nearest to her. “Let’s begin. Shall we?”

 

And for the rest of the evening, Kirika simply read palms. She started with Yukari, who only asked a few questions here and there. Junpei was second, and he asked far too many questions throughout the entire reading. Fuuka was third, and she was sure to save all her questions until Kirika finished. And she had had quite a few of them. Then Mitsuru sat down, deciding last minute she would participate in the festivities. By the end, everyone was in agreement that hers had certainly been the most accurate.

 

“That’s why I always save the best for last,” Kirika said with a joking wink.

 

Mitsuru laughed. “Thank you. That was quite intriguing.”

 

“Pretty insightful, too,” Yukari said.

 

Fuuka nodded. “Yes, I didn’t realise how much went into it.”

 

“And it definitely was a good distraction,” Junpei went on. “But I’m exhausted now, so I’m gonna head to bed. Night.” And he left.

 

“I think I’ll go to bed, too,” Fuuka said. “Tomorrow is a big day for us, after all.”

 

With that, Fuuka, Yukari, Aigis, Minato, and Ken all retired to their bedrooms for the night. That left Kirika, Akihiko, Mitsuru, and Koromaru in the lounge.

 

“Can’t believe tomorrow is the day,” Akihiko said.

 

“Seriously…” Kirika shook her head as she petted the Shiba Inu. “Did this month even happen?”

 

“Yes, I know what you mean,” Mitsuru said. “This month did pass by quickly.”

 

She thought for a moment. “So…what are our plans for Monday morning?”

 

Akihiko smiled. “That’s what I like to hear.”

 

“Actually, what will you do come Monday?” Mitsuru asked.

 

“Huh?” Kirika said. “What do you mean?”

 

“Once this is all officially over, SEES will disband for good. Then this dorm will revert to being just a normal dorm.”

 

“Oh. I hadn’t even thought of that.” She paused. “Guess I’ll just go back to staying in that abandoned house Shinji and I used to stay in.”

 

“But you said you never wanted to see that place again,” Akihiko said. He then shook his head. “Don’t worry, we’ll figure something out. I’ll make sure you don’t end up back on the streets.”

 

She smiled. “I know.”

 

Mitsuru also smiled. “I’m glad you joined the group, Nishioka. You’ve been an excellent addition.”

 

“Tch. Thanks. Let’s not get all sappy just yet, though.”

 

“Yes, of course.” She took a deep breath. “Well, we should probably do as the others have done and get to bed. We’ll want to be more than well rested for tomorrow’s battle.”

 

Akihiko nodded. “Right.”

 

So, the three of them made their way upstairs. They stopped on the second floor landing, and a slight awkwardness filled the air around them.

 

“Well, uhm…goodnight,” he said. He gave Kirika a quick kiss on the cheek and headed to his room.

 

Kirika then headed for the stairs, but she stopped herself. “Y’know, I’m gonna go to the bathroom first.”

 

Mitsuru raised an eyebrow at her. “Of course.” There was a hint of a smirk at the corners of her lips. “Goodnight.” With that, she disappeared up the staircase.

 

Kirika watched Mitsuru until she was out of sight. She could tell Mitsuru hadn’t believed her, but she hadn’t tried to stop her either. So, she took a deep breath and walked over to Akihiko’s door. She lifted her hand to knock, but decided to just let herself in. She saw him standing by his punching bag, one hand resting on it. She closed the door and he let out a heavy sigh.

 

“All my training…has led up to this moment,” he spoke up.

 

She shook her head. “No, it hasn’t.” She stepped up to him, placing her own hand on the punching bag as she faced him. “It’s led up to every boxing match you’ll have after this battle.”

 

He smiled, but it was bittersweet. “I’m fighting for everyone. Miki. Shinji. You. Everyone who has ever mattered to me will drive me to win this fight. I’m not afraid to stare death in the face.”

 

“Good.” She swallowed hard. “Because I’m still terrified, Aki, and I need you to be brave for me. I need you to be strong for me. Okay?”

 

He rested his forehead against hers. “I will be.”

 

Kirika squeezed her eyes shut as she practically choked on her own breath. It grew shaky as she tried holding back tears. Akihiko wrapped his arms tight around her. She nestled her face in the crook of his neck as he held her close. And for a while, they stayed just like that. He didn’t let her go until her breathing evened out. Even then, he was still hesitant of letting her pull away from him.

 

“Thank you,” she spoke up. “For everything.”

 

“Haven’t I told you before that you don’t have to thank me for anything?”

 

“No, you told me I don’t have to apologise for anything.”

 

“Well, you don’t have to thank me, either.”

 

She let out a strangled laugh. He then smoothed her hair back before kissing her. It was a chaste touch of their lips. Tender. Yet, somehow, it still left them both breathless. Left them with electricity under their skin.

 

She swallowed hard. “I’m tired.”

 

He nodded. “Me too.”

 

With that, they crawled into bed. Akihiko pulled Kirika close, and she willingly molded against him. Her head rested on his chest and she listened to his heartbeat. The rhythm soothed her to sleep. Persephone slept well that night, too. After all, Kirika was home. And so long as she was home, nothing could make her feel insecure.

 

Not even death itself.


	112. January 31st, 2010

The Promised Day.

 

The time had finally come. The group was gathered in the Command Room, preparing themselves for their very last operation.

 

“All right,” Mitsuru prompted, “this will probably be the last time we meet like this… Is everyone ready?”

 

“Uhm, can I say something?” Yukari stood up. “I know we have to defeat Nyx, but if you think about it, that means we’ll be getting rid of the Dark Hour. So, our memories may disappear… But even if that happens, I want you all to know, I won’t forget you. Even if it robs us of all our memories together… I will still remember you all.”

 

Junpei laughed. “We know you will, Yuka-tan.”

 

“I won’t forget you, either,” Fuuka said.

 

“Neither will I,” Ken went on.

 

“I will not forget you, Yukari-san,” Aigis said.

 

“Don’t worry,” Mitsuru continued with a soft smile, “even if you do forget about us, I’ll remind you.”

 

Akihiko nodded his head once. “Yeah…so don’t worry about it.”

 

Yukari smiled in relief. “Oh, I’m so glad to hear that.”

 

Now Junpei stood up as well. “Okay. Then after the battle, no matter what happens, let’s promise to meet each other again.”

 

“Good idea,” Ken said. “But where should we meet?”

 

“I don’t think it should be the dorm,” Fuuka said. “We’ll come back here anyways if all goes well… Hey, shouldn’t we also decide on when we’ll meet.”

 

“Yeah, it should be a special day,” Akihiko said.

 

“What about Graduation Day?” Yukari suggested. “When the Dark Hour vanishes, our memories might not disappear right away. So, we shouldn’t plan to meet too soon after the battle. And there’s no day that will have more significance to us all.”

 

“Wow, you’re really smart, Yukari-san,” Ken said. “Graduation Day… Yes, that will be easy to remember.”

 

“Yeah, that’s probably our best bet,” Junpei said. “Graduation Day it is. Now, where should we meet?”

 

“It should be somewhere where it’s easy to recognise that peace has returned to the city,” Mitsuru said. “And when we meet again, we should all remember how we’re feeling right now… That no matter what happens, we will never look back…”

 

Yukari nodded. “I agree.”

 

Koromaru barked in agreement as well.

 

Mitsuru laughed. “Sorry, but you’ll just have to wait.” She paused. “Nishioka, you’ve been awfully quiet.”

 

Kirika simply shrugged her shoulders. “Let’s just get this done and over with. Why waste time?”

 

Akihiko took her hand. “Kiri…”

 

She let out a heavy sigh. “If we do forget…” She paused, shaking her head. “Never mind. That’s not the main concern at this moment. Right now we need to put all our focus on Nyx.”

 

“Very well. Let’s get going, then,” Mitsuru said.

 

Minato got to his feet. “Let’s do this like always.”

 

Yukari nodded again. “Yeah.”

 

Fuuka smiled. “Together.”

 

“I will do my best,” Aigis said.

 

“Good, ‘cause I’m counting on you,” Junpei said.

 

Akihiko smirked. “This is going to be easy.”

 

“Yes, it is,” Mitsuru finished.

 

The team left the dorm and made their way for Tartarus. They arrived as soon as the Dark Hour began. The final Dark Hour. Kirika took a deep breath, still trying to ready herself. Mentally. Physically. Emotionally. She was all over the place. And Akihiko must have been able to sense her uneasiness, because he refused to let go of her hand.

 

Everyone made their way to the top of Tartarus. Minato, Akihiko, Junpei, and Aigis took care of most of the Shadows they ran into along the way. When they reached the 258th floor, they ran into their first real roadblock:

 

Jin.

 

“So, you came after all,” he spoke up.

 

Akihiko stepped up. “You… Where’s your partner?”

 

“Takaya went on ahead of me. He’s destined for greater things.” He focused his attention on the group. “So, it looks like you’re serious about fighting Nyx.”

 

Fuuka’s eyes widened a bit. “How do you know about Nyx?”

 

“I pieced together the information Ikutsuki left behind. But not all of it made sense… He was a real nut job.”

 

“Did you know Ikutsuki?” Yukari asked.

 

“We were surprised to find out he was your boss. We really only knew his name. He was just one of the researchers who created us.”

 

“He _created_ you?” Mitsuru said.

 

“Who are you?” Fuuka went on.

 

“Heh, there’s no use in telling you… The end is near.”

 

“He’s stalling,” Kirika muttered to the group.

 

“You’re right. We don’t have time for this.” Mitsuru stood straighter, squaring off her shoulders. “Get out of our way.”

 

“Can’t do that, little lady,” Jin said with a shake of his head. “There’s no way you’ll be able to stop Nyx… But I can’t let you interfere with Takaya’s wish.”

 

“Do you even understand what you’re saying?” Yukari said. “If Nyx isn’t stopped, all life will be destroyed.”

 

“Exactly. We won’t live much longer…and we want to see the end before we die. That is Takaya’s wish…so I’m not backing down. Enough talk. Let’s do this.”

 

So, they began fighting. And Kirika did what she always did; she stood by Fuuka, hand hovering over her Evoker in case she would be needed. _Please don’t let me be needed_. Not yet, at least.

 

“That’s it, I ain’t holding back,” Jin said. “I’ve improved since our last fight. You can’t hide your weaknesses from me.”

 

Words of provocation. Instigation. Although, they only seemed to fuel the group while they weakened Jin. _Tch, you think you’re tough? I won’t lose this time_. _No…I ain’t finished yet. Come on_. _Damn it_ …

 

Surprisingly enough, this battle ended up being easier than the first.

 

“Ugh…I failed…”  Jin fell to his knees. “What’re you waiting for? Finish me off. I would do anything for Takaya.”

 

Akihiko’s brow furrowed. “Why are you so loyal to him?”

 

“Heh…you wouldn’t understand… Takaya showed me the light when I was in the darkness…” He sat himself down. “It was a long time ago… In order to better understand the Dark Hour, Kirijo rounded up kids that were living on the streets, and gave them special powers…so they could investigate Tartarus.”

 

Mitsuru’s eyes widened. “What?”

 

“But when that power doesn’t emerge naturally,” he continued, “it’s difficult to control. So, the kids had to take experimental medication, so their powers wouldn’t kill them. Only three kids out of the original hundred survived, and after six months, the experiment was cancelled.”

 

“Then, those three were—” Fuuka stopped herself with a soft gasp.

 

Mitsuru’s gaze had since fallen to the floor. “You all suffered at the hands of Kirijo…”

 

“Takaya saved me from it all,” Jin went on. “He said, ‘Don’t let the past control you, and don’t look to the future; simply live in the moment…’ To be honest, I don’t even care about Kirijo anymore. But Takaya’s wish…must be…fulfilled.”

 

“You—” Yukari said.

 

All of a sudden, Shadows flooded the scene.

 

“Tch, we were here too long,” Akihiko said.

 

“We’re running out of time,” Mitsuru went on. “We have to go. Now.”

 

“But…we can’t—” Junpei said.

 

“You idiots,” Jin said. “I don’t want your pity…”

 

And so the group took off running. Kirika looked back to see the Shadows converging around Jin. She breathed deep to keep up with the others. Then they all felt the vibration of an explosion from the stairs.

 

Junpei stopped. “Hey, was that—? Did he—?”

 

Kirika shook her head. “Don’t think about it.”

 

“Let’s go,” Mitsuru said.

 

They continued to the top of Tartarus, dealing with the single Shadows they faced along the way. Then they met their second intrusion on the 262nd floor:

 

Takaya.

 

“Is the top of Tartarus past here?” Akihiko spoke up first again.

 

“Indeed,” Takaya said.

 

“Then let us through.”

 

“I am not standing in your way.” He rose to his feet. “I take it you have defeated Jin. You are quite troublesome. What is it that you seek? These are your final moments… The end is nigh.”

 

“Sorry, but we’re not gonna let that happen.”

 

“You are merely wasting your energy. Why not celebrate this wonderful moment? What better way could you spend your final moments together?”

 

“Will you shut up already?” Yukari said.

 

“My life was stolen from me,” Takaya went on. “And in its place, I was given a power I never asked for… And so I learned that the future is only a delusion. Only by striving to live every moment to its fullest can the soul be truly satisfied. That is why we welcome this glorious revelation; to shine a light upon this darkened world.”

 

“You’re so full of shit,” Junpei said. “I’m not dying so you can have a frigging nightlight.”  


“This is not merely my desire. There are many who have also gathered to rejoice in her arrival.”

 

“That’s just because all these weird things have been happening,” Fuuka said.

 

“That is untrue… Who is responsible for reviving Nyx? Can a single person boast of this great accomplishment? You all worked so tirelessly to prevent it, and yet in doing so, you unwittingly aided in her coming… So, you see, this is not just my will; it is the will of all people. Man cannot face death without first finding meaning in life… But the world has realised that any meaning in life was lost long ago… Nyx has come because humanity has cried out for her salvation.”

 

Fuuka’s eyes now widened. “That can’t be.”

 

Ken shook his head. “I-I don’t believe you.”

 

“And yet, there is truth in what he says,” Aigis spoke up.

 

“Aigis…” Yukari said.

 

“But now we know that it was a mistake,” she went on. “And that’s why we’re here. It’s not a matter of whether it is possible or not… It’s matter of believing in ourselves. That’s what it means to _live_.”

 

“The world isn’t so simple that one person can decide whether we all live or we all die,” Mitsuru said. “So, even if there is no hope, we won’t give up.”

 

Kirika smirked. “Memento vivere.”

 

“Hmph.” Takaya now stepped in front of the group. “What do you know of this world? No matter how long you search or how hard you pray, eventually you will realise there is no truth. Just as death is eternal, a truth that has been lost can never be found again. Are you really so desperate to die that you will stand before the almighty Nyx? Such foolishness is what I am trying to rid this world of.” He pulled out his Evoker. “If you insist on asserting your way of living, then I shall do the same. The coming of Nyx is but moments away.” And he broke into maniacal laughter.

 

That was when they started fighting him. So, Kirika’s hand returned to her Evoker. At the ready.

 

“You needn’t hurry,” Takaya continued. “The moment we await is predestined. It’s only a matter of time.”

 

Words of wisdom. Or so Kirika assumed that’s what Takaya believed them to be. _Even as I speak, I can feel it. The end of everything…I pity those who cannot see it for what it truly is…a blessing_. _We are mere mortals; we cannot change fate. You would be foolish to deny it_ … _It seems were are destined to be in opposition…How can you summon such power even in the face of death_?

 

By the end, Takaya lay on the floor, defeated. “I have failed…haven’t I?” He breathed heavily. “There is nothing more I can do. Now…kill me.”

 

Aigis paused. “Are you scared?”

 

“What a peculiar question… You know nothing of death if you think it is something to fear.”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“You fear it because you do not understand it… I will not explain to you any further.”

 

“There’s no honour in taking the life of someone who can’t move,” Mitsuru spoke up. “You will live to see if what you wished for comes true or not.”

 

“Yeah, lie there and repent for what you’ve done,” Junpei said.

 

Takaya chuckled. “You are all so odd…” He closed his eyes.

 

Kirika crouched beside him. “Y’know, if it’s any consolation, none of us asked for these powers, either.”

 

“We’re finally here,” Mitsuru went on. “Up ahead is the top of Tartarus; the promised place Ryoji spoke of… Let’s regroup for the final battle.”

 

Kirika rose to her feet as Akihiko stepped over to her. She shot him a sheepish smile, and he took a deep breath, nodding his head a couple times. They were just about at the top of the tower that seemed to touch the moon.

 

Once they recuperated, they continued on their way. And when they finally arrived on the roof of Tartarus, the first thing each of them noticed were the dark clouds billowing all around.

 

“We finally reached the top,” Mitsuru said.

 

“Hey, look at the sky,” Yukari said.

 

And so everyone looked up.

 

“Something’s coming,” Fuuka said.

 

“Is it Nyx?” Akihiko went on.

 

“I can sense it even without my Persona. This is the first time that’s ever happened…”

 

A large-winged creature descended upon the tower. Once it was close enough, they saw the resemblance of its face…

 

“You are—” Aigis started.

 

Yukari’s eyes widened. “Ryoji-kun?”

 

“That was my name for a time,” the creature spoke up. “I didn’t mind it.”

 

“What’s going on?” Mitsuru said. “Wait, are you—?”

 

“I am merely a harbinger of the Fall… Although, Nyx and myself are now one in the same.”

 

“Is that so?” Akihiko thought for a moment. “Well, regardless, I don’t regret my decision. I’ll defeat you, no matter what you are.”

 

“I see… Then you must already know. What people fear most… What they try to ignore… That is what I am.”

 

“We know that already,” Ken said.

 

“Yeah…everyone does,” Akihiko said.

 

“You are what awaits all living things from the moment they are born,” Mitsuru went on.

 

“Then you also understand it’s pointless to resist,” the creature continued. “So why do you? There must be fear in your hearts.”

 

“Yeah, of course I’m scared,” Junpei spoke up. “But it’s no use carrying on about it. I wanna live.”

 

“I’m tired of running,” Yukari said. “Living means looking death square in the face. So, I won’t back down…not even from you.”

 

“I will stop you,” Aigis went on, “even if it costs me my life. That is my own decision.”

 

Kirika swallowed hard. “I’ve had plenty of near-death experiences already. Why should this one be any different?”

 

The creature seemed to take all this into deep consideration. “I see.”

 

“Everyone, get ready,” Fuuka said. “Nyx is prepared to attack.” She turned around. “I’m sensing Shadows approaching from below, too.”

 

“Everyone who’s not fighting Nyx should try to keep them at bay,” Mitsuru said. “This is our last chance… We can’t afford to lose.”

 

With that, the group dispersed into two. Yukari, Junpei, Ken, and Koromaru focused on the Shadows coming from inside Tartarus. Minato, Akihiko, Mitsuru, and Aigis focused on the creature, as well as Fuuka for backup. Kirika made sure to pay close attention to just about everyone, her Evoker already in her hand. Once a good amount of damage had been dealt to the creature, she had only been needed twice. Yet she couldn’t decide if that was good or bad.

 

“The moment man devoured the fruit of knowledge,” the creature spoke up, “he sealed his fate… Entrusting his future to the cards, man clings to a dim hope.” There was a brief pause. “Yet, the Arcana is the means by which all is revealed… Attaining one’s dream requires a stern will and unfailing determination.”

 

That was when Fuuka sensed a change of Arcana and properties. Fool to Magician. But the four continued to fight the creature without missing a beat. Until, that is, Fuuka picked up on another alteration of the creature’s Arcana.

 

“The Arcana is the means by which all is revealed…” the creature repeated. “The silent voice within one’s heart whispers the most profound wisdom.”

 

Magician to Priestess.

 

“Shit… It’s a pattern,” Kirika said to Fuuka. “I think Nyx is gonna go through each of the main Arcana.”

 

And it seemed she would be correct about that.

 

Empress. _Celebrate life’s grandeur…it’s brilliance…it’s magnificence._ Emperor. _Only courage in the face of doubt can lead one to the answer._ Hierophant. _It is indeed a precious gift to understand the forces that guide oneself._ Lovers. _There is both joy and wonder in coming to understand another._ Chariot. _One of life’s greatest blessings is the freedom to pursue one’s goals._ Justice. _To find the one true path, one must seek guidance amidst uncertainty._ Hermit. _It requires great courage to look at oneself honestly and forge one’s own path._ Fortune. _Alongside time exists fate, the bearer of cruelty._ Strength. _Only with strength can one endure suffering and torment._ Hanged Man. _In the face of disaster lies opportunity for renewal._

 

At long last, they fought through and defeated the thirteen Arcana.

 

“The moment man devoured the fruit of knowledge,” the creature began to repeat once more, “he sealed his fate… Entrusting his future to the cards, man clings to a dim hope. Yet, the Arcana is the means by which all is revealed… Beyond the beaten path lies the absolute end. It matters not who you are… Death awaits you.”

 

And the creature’s Arcana changed once more. Death.

 

They continued to fight. Fuuka continued to provide backup. Kirika continued to defend. To protect. All to the best of their abilities.

 

“You cannot avoid death,” the creature said. “To live is to die; they are one in the same…”

 

A barrier then appeared in front of the creature. Given a bad feeling, Fuuka made sure everyone held their attacks. And Kirika made sure to hold tightly to her Evoker. She refused to lose anyone this time around. Soon enough, the barrier disappeared. They then continued fighting as normal.

 

“Let us finish this,” the creature spoke up. “It is the path of your choosing.”

 

The battle carried on. Then, after what seemed like forever, they managed to defeat the tireless creature. He slumped to the ground, suddenly becoming motionless.

 

Mitsuru paused. “Did we do it?”

 

Having spoken too soon, the creature suddenly stirred. He slowly began to levitate into the blackened sky.

 

“Such a pity,” the creature started. “You understand fate, yet you still fight against it with all of your will… If more people were like you, then perhaps the Fall could have been prevented…but it’s too late now.”

 

The creature continued to rise, and the moon began to…open? It opened, revealing a large entity within.

 

“The moon…” Fuuka said.

 

“What is that?” Yukari said.

 

The creature sent a beam up into the moon.

 

Akihiko’s eyes widened. “This—This can’t be real.”

 

“Soon… Soon it will descend upon us—upon us all,” Aigis said.

 

Kirika looked down over the city so far below them. Despite how high up they were, she could still make out the chaos their home was turning into.

 

“The coffins are gone,” she spoke up. “Everyone can see what’s happening…” She shook her head. “No one deserves to be aware of this.”

 

“At last…” a male voice then said.

 

They all turned to see Takaya. He had dropped to his knees and broke out into laughter again.

 

“You…” Ken said.

 

He chuckled a bit more. “Vexing, isn’t it? The look on your face is priceless.”

 

Akihiko clenched his fists. “Shut up.”

 

“But what’re we gonna do?” Yukari said.

 

Fuuka’s eyes widened. “Something’s coming.”

 

Just then, the moon shot out a wave of energy. It hit the group, and it suddenly became the most difficult task for them to remain on their feet. Kirika held onto Akihiko, and he did the same with her.

 

“What is this…?” Ken said.

 

“This is…nothing…” Yukari went on.

 

“How ridiculous,” Takaya said. “Are you out of your mind?”

 

“Look who’s talking,” Junpei spoke up.

 

“Death is imminent… Surely you know this… What do you hope to accomplish now? I wanted to see the end with my own eyes… Jin…” And he passed out.

 

“I will never give up,” Aigis said. “Never.”

 

The creature only continued feeding the beam into the moon. “Why resist that which is inevitable? You will only suffer…”

 

“Damn it, I won’t back down,” Junpei said.

 

“I’ve made up my mind,” Yukari continued. “I’ll fight to the end.”

 

Everyone managed to work their way back to their feet. So, the moon sent out another wave. Kirika and Ken wen back down.

 

“Ken,” Akihiko called out to the kid. He looked down at his side. “Kiri…”

 

Still holding onto her, he tried pulling her back up, but failed, rejoining her on the ground. Aigis and Junpei then fell again as well, followed by Yukari and Fuuka.

 

“Son of a—” Junpei said.

 

“We’ve come this far,” Mitsuru spoke up. “I will not submit.”

 

She, Minato, and Koromaru then also collapsed.

 

Kirika tried to breathe. She tried to reach for her Evoker, but she could barely move her arms. Plus, she refused to release her grip on Akihiko. So, she attempted summoning Persephone without the extra help, but to no avail. So, she continued to just focus on breathing. Remember to breathe. Remember to live.

 

Memento vivere.

 

And then, all of a sudden, Minato effortlessly rose to his feet. He began floating upwards toward the entity in the moon.

 

“What the—?” Akihiko spoke up.

 

“No, don’t go,” Aigis called after him.

 

They all tried to stop him and bring him back, but none of them could manage to stand up and stay up.

 

“What is he doing?” Yukari said.

 

“Damn it, why the hell can’t I stand up?” Junpei said.

 

“Why? After all we’ve been through… Stop, don’t do this. Come back.”

 

It was too late, though. Minato had already disappeared inside the moon.

 

“There’s nothing we can do,” Ken went on.

 

“Don’t give up,” Akihiko said. “We have to believe in him.”

 

“Give him strength,” Mitsuru said. “Take my life is you must.”

 

Yukari nodded. “Yeah, I’m willing to risk mine, too.”

 

“He’s going to face it all by himself,” Fuuka said.

 

Junpei shook his head. “No, he’s not alone. I won’t let him die.”

 

Koromaru barked in agreement with the others.

 

“I won’t allow this world to be destroyed,” Aigis said.

 

“Persephone is yours for the taking, Arisato,” Kirika spoke up. “Use her.”

 

There was then a blinding light. By the time it faded, the scene around the group had altered. They now seemed to be standing in…space.

 

Yukari looked around. “Where are we…?”

 

“Did Nyx create this place?” Mitsuru said. “Or was it Arisato?”

 

“Is he all right, Fuuka?” Akihiko checked. “What happened?”

 

“Everything was engulfed by a bright light,” Fuuka said. “I don’t sense him…”

 

“Don’t tell me he—” Ken started.

 

“No,” Junpei shut him up. “That can’t be. Try again. He can’t be the only one…” Fuuka shook her head, looking down. He sighed. “You gotta be kidding me…”

 

“Damn it… Not again,” Akihiko said.

 

Kirika dropped to her knees. “I can’t believe this…”

 

“We all decided to put our lives on the line,” Mitsuru went on. “In fact, we came here knowing we would most likely die.”

 

“But we’re not dead, Kirijo,” she said. “And he is. And that doesn’t seem fair.”

 

“How could I be so powerless?” Aigis spoke up. “This is what I was trying to prevent.”

 

Yukari then looked up. “You’re there, aren’t you? I know you are. I refuse to believe that you’re gone.” She paused. “Answer me. I know you can hear me.”

 

“We’re here,” Aigis continued. “Please, let us hear your voice.”

 

Everyone began calling out, desperately attempting to get some sort of answer from the void all around them.

 

“It’s all right,” a male voice finally said.

 

Everyone’s gaze turned upwards.

 

“Don’t worry,” another male voice took over.

 

Akihiko’s eyes widened a bit. “That voice…”

 

“I will sleep once again,” it continued. “Normal days will return to this universe. For you…and for him.” There was a pause. “He’s found the answer to life’s greatest question. It just happened a bit sooner than it will for the rest of you.”

 

“Life’s greatest question…” Aigis said.

 

“Aigis…you’ll find the answer one day, as well. You, too, are a precious living thing. You just need to realise how the bonds of friendship have changed you…” Another pause. “The Dark Hour will soon vanish from this world… All will truly be relinquished from its dominion, and the legacy of life will continue. Congratulations, you have the miracle you sought. We shall meet again someday…”

 

Next thing any of them knew, they were standing right outside of Tartarus. The tower suddenly broke apart and disintegrated into the night before their very eyes. Once it was gone, Minato reappeared before them, but he didn’t seem like himself. Aigis took hold of him as they both fell to the ground, and she began to cry. The others gathered around them in silence. The sky returned to normal…

 

The Dark Hour had ended. Permanently.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp, talk about an intense chapter...an intense end to the month, haha Can't believe there are only four more updates left after this. Stay tuned :3


	113. February [Unknown], 2010

Kirika awoke with a start. A panic. It took her a long moment to recollect herself and force her mind into believing she truly was on a moving train. She wasn’t on the streets. Out in the open. She wasn’t in any sort of danger. She was perfectly safe. She was fine.

 

As fine as she could be.

 

Only about two weeks into the new month, and it had already been a busy one. Kirika had found herself in four different towns during that short amount of time. When she had woken up on the first on the month, she had woken up with the strongest desire to travel everywhere and not stay anywhere for too long. After all, she had been in Iwatodai for a good nine months, and that was definitely far too long.

 

As she traveled, she picked up a few single-day odd jobs here and there. In the smaller towns, it usually just involved cleaning. In the bigger cities, she reverted to tarot and palm readings. Tch. City folks always seemed so captivated by those mystical and paranormal things. She never really understood why.

 

She looked out the window towards the light of the new day. She wasn’t sure how long she had been on this train, but she’d ride it to its final stop if she had to. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes, quickly reopening them when she found she couldn’t stop thinking about—Tch. Nothing. Instead, she thought back on a conversation she had had before leaving the previous town she had been in:

 

_“Do you really have to go so soon?” a young girl from the town asked her on the day she was leaving._

 

 _“Yep,” Kirika said. Short and…not-so-sweet. Simple_.

 

_“Why?”_

 

_“That’s just the way it is, kid.” She didn’t have to give a reason._

 

_“Where do you plan on going next?”_

 

_She shrugged her shoulders. “Nowhere in particular.”_

 

_“You don’t have family you wanna visit?”_

 

_“Nope.”_

_“What about friends?”_

 

_“Tch.”_

 

_“Hmm.” She paused, thinking. Then an eager smile popped onto her face. “Doesn’t that mean you could just stay here, then?”_

 

_“I can’t.”_

 

_“Why not?”_

 

Huh. Good question. Why couldn’t Kirika have just stayed there? Why couldn’t she just find a nice, small, random town to settle down in? A place in the middle of nowhere. In solitary. Where she could be alone and not have to deal with other people. Why couldn’t it be that simple for her…?

 

That’s right. Because something inside her was telling her that would be wrong. That she had somewhere to be.

 

_“We could be your family and friends,” the little girl went on._

 

_“Tch.” Kirika had to hold back a laugh. “Thanks, but no thanks. I don’t need a family or friends,” she said with a shake of her head. “Besides, this place just don’t feel right to me. And if I ever do decide to actually stay in one place for the rest of my life, I want to make sure that one place feels right.”_

 

_“How will you know?”_

 

_“I’ll just know once I get there.”_

 

_“Oh.” The girl smiled dreamily. “Kinda like when you meet the person you’re supposed to be with forever and you just know they’re the one?”_

 

_She scoffed. “Not at all like that. I don’t do relationships.”_

 

_“Huh? Why not?”_

 

_“You’re asking me way too many damn questions, kid, and I’ve already given you more than enough answers.”_

 

_She folded her arms across her chest. “Hmph.”_

 

_Just then, the train arrived._

 

_“Well, this is me,” Kirika said, holding her shoulder bag tighter to herself._

 

_“Thanks for your help around town,” the girl said._

 

_“Yeah, no problem.”_

 

_“Will we ever see you again?”_

 

_She smiled. “Definitely not.”_

 

From there, she had boarded the train and found an empty seat far enough away from the other passengers. A seat on the opposite side of the stop. That way she could look out the window without seeing the stranger from the town. Without seeing the place that she could’ve called home. Just another place she never would call home. Because, to Kirika, home never would be a place. Home was—Maybe it was wherever this train was going next. She had no idea. The train’s route was a total mystery to her.

 

It wasn’t the only enigma.

 

When it came to dreams versus reality, there were plenty of things Kirika could no longer decipher. Scars on her body that seemed to have appeared out of nowhere. A key hanging around her neck that didn’t seem to belong to anything. A fake pistol hidden within her bag with a peculiar inscription: _Memento Vivere_. Whatever the hell that was supposed to mean. And dreams—nightmares—of being chased by shadow-like creatures. Nightmares of gunshots and waking up to a loud ringing in her ears…

 

These were the things she didn’t want to think about. The things she had questions to but was too afraid to ask. Too afraid of what the answers may be. These were the things that kept her moving. That stopped her from settling down in one place for too long. It seemed she had already made that mistake, and so she refused to make it again. Because when someone becomes familiar with a city, they also become familiar with all its people. Then when that happens, friendships happen. Relationships.

 

Those are what cause memories. And those were what she was trying to avoid.

 

Memories.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nothing romantic about this chapter, but Happy Valentine's Day to all my readers x3


	114. March 3rd, 2010

Kirika stepped off the train and looked around the station. Iwatodai. She had been here in this godforsaken city only a month ago, yet it still felt so strange to her. It felt different. Then again, after a good seven years of traveling, she supposed her original home would feel strange.

 

She had spent the entirety of February traveling from place to place to place. Except she had made it just about a day to day to day thing instead. After all, when she had woken up on the first day of the new month, she couldn’t for the life of her remember why she had returned to Iwatodai. Or why she had stuck around for as long as she had. So, she had wanted to make up for that lost travel time.

 

With each new town she had arrived in, though, she couldn’t shake this growing feeling within her. A feeling that she didn’t belong. So, she started retracing her steps. And now she found herself back where she started.

 

She breathed deep, touching the necklace around her neck. The key pendant. An item she couldn’t remember acquiring. But something told her not to question it. It was that same nagging feeling that had led her back to the city. The place she once left when she was only eleven because she had never wanted to see it again. Just another thing she couldn’t remember. But now she did actually feel better being back here. She felt comfortable and safe and—

 

Damn it. What was going on?

 

She decided to shake it off for now and just take a walk around the city. So, she did. She left the station and made her way around the tiny strip mall. She went from shop to shop, browsing more than anything else. Then she headed even deeper into the city.

 

Along the way, she came across what she guessed could only be one of the school dorms. She stopped outside it and gave it a once over. Seemed a little out of place for a dorm, but what did she care? Why should she be so intrigued? Tch… A guy with blue hair then walked out of the building. He gave her a quick glance—a small nod—but didn’t seem fazed by her presence. For whatever reason, she watched him until he was out a sight. Maybe it was the blue hair that had caught her attention. Either way, once he was gone, she turned back around. And she jumped when she saw a girl standing before her.

 

“The hell is your issue?” she said.

 

“My apologies,” the blonde girl said. “Uhm… Do you live here?”

 

“Tch. I don’t live anywhere. Nor do I even attend this frigging school. Or any school, in that matter.”

 

“Graduation is in two days.”

 

She paused, raising an eyebrow. “And…?”

 

“You should be there.”

 

“Pretty sure I wouldn’t be let in.” She folded her arms across her chest. “Why would I go anyway?”

 

“Be-because—”

 

“I think you might have me confused with someone else.” And she walked away.

 

“My name is Aigis,” she called after her.

 

She froze, but only for a brief moment. “Sorry, but I don’t give my name out to random people.” Then she shook her head, and continued walking away.

 

Soon enough, she found herself at the old Shrine. She headed up the steps only to almost instantly be pounced by a small dog. An albino Shiba Inu.

 

“Hi, boy,” she greeted him with a smile as she knelt beside him to pet him. “You lost?” The dog seemed saddened by that question. “Do you need help finding your owner, or your way home?” He whimpered before nudging at her knees. “Hmm. Do you not have a home?” The dog continued to only whine and nuzzle her. “Sorry, boy, but I’m not sure I can help you.” She stood back up. “Hope you find what you need.”

 

With that, she left the Shrine. Then, just as she turned the corner, someone was coming from the other side and ran straight into her at full force. They both went tumbling to the cold ground.

 

“S-sorry,” the guy said, half on top of her. “I’m really sorry about that.”

 

“Get off me.” She pushed him away from her.

 

“Sorry.” He used the ground to bring himself to his knees. “Guess I was so caught up in my training that I—”

 

“Just watch where you’re going next time. Okay?” She propped herself onto her elbows, her weight digging into the pavement. “I ain’t in the mood to deal with morons who don’t pay attention to their surroundings.”

 

“Hey, I apologised.”

 

“Oh yeah, because I totally forgot saying sorry automatically fixes everything.” She rolled her eyes at him.

 

Without another word, the guy returned to his feet. She figured he was gonna leave her be, but instead, he held out a gloved hand. That was when she finally focused on him and got a good look. Grey eyes. White hair. Just another stranger. Yet, there was a familiarity about him…

 

“I don’t need your chivalry,” she spoke up.

 

His hand dropped. “What’s your problem?”

 

“Right now, it’s you.”

 

“Tch. Fix your attitude.” And he jogged off.

 

Her eyes widened at this. “Excuse me? Who the hell does he think he is? Telling me to fix my attitude. Ugh.” She got back to her feet and brushed herself off.

 

She then continued on her walk. Soon enough, the Moonlight Bridge appeared in her line of view. At first, a sense of fear washed over her, practically leaving her body numb. That odd sensation didn’t last long, though. In fact, it ended as soon as it had begun. Puzzled, she decided to turn around and head back in the other direction.

 

“It’s starting to get dark,” she mumbled under her breath. “I need to figure out a place to spend the night.”

 

She made her way back towards Iwatodai Station. She debated heading into Port Island, but decided against it. So, she continued on her way, soon coming across what seemed to be an abandoned neighbourhood. She looked around, not stopping again until she found herself in front of an old brick house. She examined it, trying to figure out a way inside. And when she discovered a shattered window, she climbed through it, cautiously landing on the other side. Glass crunched beneath her feet, but she ignored it, too caught up in yet another wave of familiarity sweeping over her.

 

Great. More shit for her to not understand.

 

Right now, she didn’t want to think about the things she didn’t understand or remember. Not the people nor the places. Not the couple of scars on her body she couldn’t place to accidents. No. She didn’t want to burden herself with that nagging feeling deep inside. That feeling…like something was trying to escape.

 

Awaken.

 

Before she stopped thinking about it, though, she pulled out a weapon she kept tucked away inside her loose-fitted boot. A fake gun. One last item she had no sort of recollection of. So, she examined it, and now she did try to remember. There was a single, vague clue etched into the weapon. Two words:

 

Memento vivere.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're so close to the end...I almost can't believe it, haha


	115. March 5th, 2010

Kirika found herself wide awake early that morning. She had been back in the city for barely two days and she already wanted to leave again. That nagging feeling was telling her to stick around for just a little while longer, though. So, she did. And so she readied herself for the day ahead of her before making her way into the public eye.

 

First and foremost, she stopped by Paulownia Mall. More specifically, the café for a cup of coffee. Once she downed it, she began her aimless wandering all over the city.

 

On that day, her lack of direction led her to the cemetery. Seeing as she had nowhere else to be or go, she decided she might as well pay her respects to the strangers buried there. She picked out random tombstones as she made her rounds. Then there was a particular tombstone she stopped in front of.

 

“Shinjiro Aragaki,” she read. “Huh. Why the hell does that name sound so familiar?” She read the date engraved on the tombstone. “October fourth. Hmm… Well, I was in town then. Guess I must’ve just heard your name on the news or read about it in the paper or something. You were killed in some act of gang violence or whatever.” She shrugged her shoulders before pausing. “Gang violence? No. That doesn’t sound right… You _were_ shot, but—” She shook her head. “Hell, what do I even care? Not like I knew you. Tch. You were just another face in the crowd while I was here.”

 

“Uhm. Nishioka-san?” a boy’s voice then spoke up. She turned to see a kid and the dog from the Shrine standing off to the side. She raised an eyebrow at him as she looked him up and down, causing an expression of defeat to spread across his face. “I’m gonna say it’s safe to assume you don’t remember.”

 

“Remember what?”

 

He sighed. “Today is Graduation Day.”

 

“Why the hell does that seem so significant to everyone? Some random girl told me the same thing the other day.”

 

“We made a promise, Senpai,” he went on. “We promised we would all meet again on Graduation Day. No matter what.”

 

“Look, kiddo, sorry to burst your bubble, but I have no idea what you’re talking about. Okay. I don’t make promises.” She turned back to the tombstone. “Tch. Promises.” She rolled her eyes. “Just like the one I made to you to watch over—” She stopped, her breath catching in her throat as her eyes widened. “Son of a bitch…”

 

The memories overcame her all at once, like a tsunami or an earthquake or—

 

A typhoon.

 

She then felt something nudging at the back of her knees. She turned to see the dog at her feet. She dropped down. “Koromaru.” She petted him, laughing. “Damn it, Amada.”

 

Ken smiled. “It’s good to see you again, Senpai.”

 

She shook her head, still chuckling and choking back tears at the same time. “When did you get your memories back? Or did you ever even forget?”

 

“Is that really what’s important right now?”

 

“Guess not.” She stood up and faced the tombstone one last time. “You somehow always pull through for me, Aragaki.” She swallowed hard, nodding. “Thank you.” She turned back to Ken and Koromaru. “C’mon,” she smiled, “we have a graduation to crash.”

 

They took off, making their way for Gekkoukan High. They reached Iwatodai just in time to board the tram at the very last moment. They also caused a bit of an uproar by having Koromaru with them. Once the doors closed, though, there was nothing anyone could do about it. Then, as soon as the tram stopped at Port Island Station, the three of them ran off. And they sprinted the rest of the way to the high school. Once they reached it, they didn’t bother slowing down. Instead, they burst through the front doors. Quickly looking around, they spotted the others, halfway up the staircase. But they stopped at the sight of the other three.

 

“Ken-kun,” Fuuka said with a smile.

 

Yukari smiled as well. “Oh, Koro-chan.”

 

Junpei laughed. “Hey, even Nishioka-san made it.”

 

Akihiko didn’t say a single word. He just jumped down the stairs. Kirika rushed up to him, throwing her arms around his neck. He hugged her back tightly.

 

“I fixed my attitude,” she said in his ear. He only chuckled low in response.

 

“Come on, we’re heading up to the roof,” Mitsuru then said.

 

So, the group continued their way up the stairs. Adrenaline was pumping through each and every one of their bloodstreams; it was even filling the atmosphere. Then when they reached the rooftop, they saw that Minato and Aigis were already present. Waiting for them. Aigis was sitting on one of the benches, and Minato was laying down, resting his head on her lap. It seemed like he was just about ready to fall asleep, too…

 

Reality hit them all at once.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I seriously can't believe this...only one chapter left...this is kinda insane, given the fact that my very first update was, like, April 2nd of 2018 lmao it's been a long journey, but it's not over quite yet x3


	116. March 8th, 2010

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanna take this moment to thank everyone who has stuck with me throughout this entire story. It means so, so much to me. More than any of you will ever know or understand. To those who have been here since day one: Thank you. To those who I picked up and joined me along the way: Thank you. To those just tuning in: Thank you. I hope each and every one of you enjoyed or will enjoy this story. Honestly, I still just can't believe it's the end already, haha  
> Seriously, though, thank you so much. Thank you to the few who left comments. Thank you for the kudos. Thank you to all my readers. I appreciate every single one of you.

It took a few days for the fact to hit that Minato was gone. Although, the doctors couldn’t technically find anything wrong with him; they said he just seemed to have fallen asleep. The issue was that he showed no vital signs. No heartbeat. No pulse. No brainwaves. He hadn’t even seemed to have been breathing. So, that just made it all the more confusing for the group.

 

At least everyone got the chance to say their goodbyes.

 

Now that Kirika had been able to let the news sink in, she was ready to move on. Too bad still had no idea as to what she wanted to do. If she wanted to continue traveling like she had been for the last seven years of her life, or if she wanted to stay with one particular person. Then again, that one person wasn’t even sure yet as to where he’d be going.

 

She and Akihiko had taken a couple days to catch up. After all, they had lost an entire month of time together. So, he told her what he had been up to, which was really the same as always with him just being caught up with school and training and whatnot. Then she let him know about how she had ended up reverting to traveling for the month of February. How she had managed to visit thirteen different towns in a single month. How she had still ended up back in the city due to a nagging feeling she only could’ve assumed was Persephone. And how her memory was restored with a little help from an old friend.

 

Speaking of Persephone…

 

Originally, Kirika had been under the impression that with the elimination of the Dark Hour, her Persona would shut up, too. Persephone’s presence was still as prominent as ever within her, though. And right now, she was in battle. She was at a loss for what to do. Persephone was telling her to stay. To take it day by day and just wait to see what happened. But Kirika didn’t feel like herself by doing that.

 

She took a walk of the dorm. Everyone else was out doing their own thing. Akihiko was at the gym. Mitsuru was busy with the Group. Yukari was prepping for cram school. Ken, Fuuka, and Aigis had taken Koromaru out for a long walk. Junpei, she could only assume, was at the arcade to keep his mind off things.

 

She started on the rooftop. Let the breeze pass through her. There was still a slight chill to it, but she didn’t mind. It was soothing. She looked over the city she had been a part of for the last eleven months. All of a sudden, that wasn’t as soothing. So, she made her way back inside, heading down to the Command Room. She examined some of the books in the cases around the walls. Took a couple out to briefly flip through them and read some excerpts. Then she made her way for the third floor. She stopped in her bedroom—the room she’d been sleeping in for just about eight months now. She didn’t take much time in there. After all, not like there was anything special about it. Blank walls. So, she headed down to the second floor. She stood in the doorway of Shinjiro’s old bedroom, just like she had the night of his passing. His room was just as vacant as her own. That wasn’t very surprising. She folded her arms across her chest before she began to absentmindedly fiddle with the key around her neck. And as she looked around the empty room, it hit her all once…

 

She realised what it was she needed to do.

 

She rushed into Akihiko’s room, rummaging through his desk for a pen and a blank piece of paper. Once she found them, she scribbled a quick note:

 

_You know where to meet me._

 

With that, she left the dorm. She gave it a once over before taking a deep breath, nodding her head. She had been planning on visiting the old brick house—just one last time—but Akihiko had been right when he mentioned how she never wanted to see that place again. So, she decided against it and headed straight for the Shrine instead. When she arrived, she took a seat on the usual bench. And then she closed her eyes and waited.

 

Soon enough, she felt the presence of another body beside her.

 

“Funny how even with our memories temporarily wiped,” she spoke up, her eyes still shut, “our little run-in here that second time went down pretty much the exact same way it had happened the first time around.” She opened her eyes. “What do you think that could mean?”

 

Akihiko shrugged his shoulders. “I think it means we’re supposed to be a part of each other’s lives. That we’re meant to be together.”

 

“Do you think we’re supposed to be together right now?”

 

“Hmm.” He considered this for a long moment. “Y’know, Kiri, that night—the night the world was supposed to end—you were almost the only thing I could think about. All I wanted to do was keep you safe; I needed to know you weren’t gonna get hurt.” He paused. “Even amidst all that chaos, I realised something. I realised just how much I want to be with you. I realised just how many doubts you may still have about being with someone. So…I want to prove to you just how much you mean to me. I want to prove just how much I love you.”

 

She smiled sheepishly. “I was afraid you were gonna say that.”

 

“Kiri—”

 

“If I’m being totally honest, Aki, this last year has been absolute hell for me,” she went on. “Between the Dark Hour and Shadows and Strega and Shinji… It was just a lot of bullshit I never wanted to bother dealing with.” She paused. “I did deal with it, though. And if it hadn’t been for you, I don’t think I would’ve made it through all the way to the very end. I truly believe I would’ve taken off again after Shinji’s death. Or, better yet, after getting shot. But I stuck it out for you. I stuck _around_ for you.” Another thoughtful pause. “Although, I’m still not sure whether I stayed so I could support you, or so you could support me.”

 

“We’ve supported each other.”

 

“I know, but still…” She let out a heavy sigh. “Y’know, it was because of you I broke all my rules.” She thought for a moment. “Except the two-month rule; that one I technically broke because of Shinji.” She shook her head, chuckling half-heartedly. That was a stupid thing to bring up. To correct herself on. “Either way, every other rule was broken because of you. And I will forever hate and love you for that.”

 

He swallowed hard. “Where are you going with this?”

 

Tch. Where was she going with this? Her mind was racing a mile a minute; even Kirika could barely keep up with it. Persephone kept her on track, though. And without leading her astray.

 

“I told you from the very beginning,” she started, “that you shouldn’t try to plan a future with someone like me because I’m a flight risk.”

 

“And…?”

 

“And…I can’t stay here.” She shook her head again. “I’m sorry, but…I-I can’t just follow you to college like you want me to. I need to let you go and let you do your own thing. You deserve the opportunity to live a normal life.”

 

“Is this about you thinking you’re not good enough for me?”

 

“No, it has nothing to do with that. It has everything to do with me breaking my rules for you.”

 

“Two minutes ago, you made that sound like it was a good thing.”

 

Another shamefaced smile. “My rules were based on things I learned from my parents. Not to trust anyone because everyone will betray you. Because everyone always has some ulterior motive. And I’ve finally come to terms with how _stupid_ it was of me to let myself be controlled by two people who never even bothered naming me. Neither of them cared about what could’ve happened to me. All they cared about was the success of their cons. I was so young, though, I—I guess I somehow still wished they would want me. That by taking part in their cons, I could still be a part of their lives.” Kirika paused. “Every child wants their parents’ love and affection. Even when their parents aren’t good people. So, I made those rules to…honour them, in a sense. And now that I know how wrong that was, I need to learn the proper way to live for myself.”

 

“I could help you.”

 

She shook her head. “Over these last few months, Aki, I’ve built this sort of…dependency around you. A-and I can’t live like that. I can’t learn like that. I need to figure out who I am as my own person. But I can’t do that by following you wherever it is you go.”

 

He nodded. “I understand.”

 

He gave in way more easily than she had been anticipating. Hell, it almost caught her off guard. “What I need you to understand most is that I—” She needed to choose her words carefully now. “I don’t want this to be a goodbye. That’s actually the last thing I want. I just can’t guarantee when we’ll see each other again. So, until then—” The words caught in her throat. “I’m not running away. I’m running to the person I’m supposed to be. The person I lost sight of all those years ago. I mean, she’s still out there, right? She has to be. So, I need to find her.”

 

He took this into consideration. “You made a promise to Shinji…” His voice was barely audible.

 

And there it was. The backlash. “Please, don’t do that. Don’t throw that in my face; it’s not fair.” She let out a heavy sigh. “C’mon, Aki, I don’t want this to end on bad terms. I don’t want this to end at all, but this is just—it’s something I need to do.”

 

“You’re right. I’m sorry.” He took a deep breath, recomposing himself. “This is just a little hard for me. I mean, I had been expecting you to end up staying.”

 

“Well, things don’t always work out the way we plan.” Not that she ever had a plan. Not that falling in love would’ve ever been part of it. Here she was, though. Yet, she was still about ready to say goodbye. “But if you wanna prove to me just how much I mean to you and just how much you love me—like you said—then you’ll let me do this.” She paused, swallowing hard. “You’ll let me go.”

 

He still refused to meet her gaze. “When do you plan on leaving?” he asked. When she didn’t respond, he finally looked up at her. “You’re leaving now, aren’t you?”

 

“If I don’t, then I know you’ll come up with a convincing argument to make me stay.”

 

Now he chuckled, but it was bittersweet. “You just gotta make everything complicated, huh?” He shook his head. “You’re so ridiculous.” He paused, thinking before getting to his feet. “All right, let’s go. We’ll stop at the dorm so you can say goodbye to the others, then I’ll walk you to the station.” He turned to leave.

 

“No,” she said.

 

He stopped. “No?”

 

She rose to her feet as well, pulling her shoulder bag closer to her. “I’m not very good at goodbyes. That’s why I asked you to meet me here. And honestly, I almost didn’t even do that, but I figured you at least deserved an explanation. So, I’m gonna need you to tell the others goodbye for me.”

 

“But…they’ll wanna see you off.”

 

Without another word, Kirika stepped up to Akihiko, closing the distance between them. Two or three months ago, there would’ve been a hint of hesitation in her step. Not now, though. Not anymore. And when she did step up to him, she kissed him deeply. He wound his arms tightly around her waist, kissing her back almost desperately. And, in that moment, the spark made time stop. It stopped, and the world emptied of every other person. Right then, they were the only two people who existed. And after living through the end of the world and looking death straight in the eye, that said a lot.

 

“Kiri, I—” he said once they broke apart.

 

“Don’t say it,” she said. “I already know.” She stepped away from him. “Just like I know, one day, Persephone will lead me back to you. Until that day, though…” Once again, the words caught in her throat. Hell, she really wasn’t any good at goodbyes.

 

He smiled a sad smile. “I’ll be waiting.”

 

With that, she let go of him, and she walked away. She walked away from the Shrine. She walked away from the life she had grown so accustomed to. The life she had grown so comfortable with. And she walked away from Akihiko. But she wasn’t running. At least, she wasn’t running away from anything. No. For the first time in her life, she was running to something. Some _one_. Herself.

 

This was something Kirika needed to do. She had accepted that already. Just like she had accepted the fact that she was a normal teenage girl with abnormal abilities. Maybe it wasn’t the exact life she had wanted, but it was no longer a life she felt the need to change. Now she would retrace her steps to collect the pieces of herself she had left behind along the way.

 

And when the time was right, Kirika would run back home to where she belonged.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FYI, there will be sequels coming for this story, but not until more towards the end of the year. Probably October-ish. So, stay tuned :3


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